Submitting to a Sinner

Makes us shrink our lives to the narrow confines of our little self defined soon causes us to shrink our focus and are concerned of the size of our own wants and her own feeling sin causes us to go around through life way too self-important sin is essentially anti-social. One author said we don't have time to love other people and we don't have time to love our spouse because were too busy loving. I have some don't let this shot, but here it is your married to a sinner.

Of course you already know that what you might not be so quick to acknowledge is that your spouse is also married to a sinner. Sin has tarnished every relationship, every single one. Therefore, marriage is not immune to sin's effects. Today Stephen begins a teaching series on marriage called for better or for worse. It comes from first Peter three, where Peter gives God's wisdom for husbands and wives. Stevens calling today's lesson submitting to a sinner.

Paul David Tripp in his book for couples titled what did you expect, I think is a great title.

He compared a wedding to a vacation brochure you know this is true if you've ever looked at a vacation brochure or website before traveling there no vacation site will ever look as nice or function, as well as the promotional information of the triggers for those of you are married when you stood and repeated those valves, for richer or for poorer, you never had any idea how poor that poorer would be when you promise for better or for worse. You had no idea how worse they could get right to love the humorous, tongue-in-cheek story, Harris Ontario three months after her wedding day, young bride rushes back into the pastor's office. She's hysterical. She's a pastor. My husband and I had our first big fight together. It was really bad it was. It was awful. Now what am I going to do. The pastor said just calm down. It isn't as bad as you think every marriage has to have his first big argument is okay. She said, well, all right, but what am I going to do with the body.

Maybe there are reasons why our world is still skeptical about this kind of commitment. There's a reason you can now lease, wedding rings, one month at a time. You really can't. There's a reason the traditional as long as life shall last is been rewritten to say as long as love shall last 1960s, 70% of all adults were married today, that number is half more and more couples are living together and making that commitment. I think the reason why summarize just a couple of days ago by an unbelieving actress who was interviewed and she after separating them from her second husband said this rather telling statement. She said I think the idea of marriage is romantic.

It's a beautiful idea. I think it's natural to be monogamous and it's a lot of work. In other words, it is beautiful. It really shouldn't be so much hard work it is in many ways against our nature.

It runs counter to who we are apart from what God wants us to be effective going to demand spiritual wisdom and spiritual commitment, spiritual power, the Bible says, by wisdom a house is built by understanding it is established and by knowledge its rooms are filled with pleasant riches.

That's quite a promise, but it takes God's wisdom to build to establish and to fill with precious things sorry can you find God's wisdom will be on the telephone to going through all your cell phones off day I find out wisdom to build it. Establish and fill your home with the right things and glad you asked because were at the text were we begin to uncover the answer now verse one in the same way you wives be submissive to your own husbands, so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be one without a word, by the behavior of their wives just his first phrase in the same way you wives be submissive to your own husbands, not this this opening in the same way makes you immediately asked the question in the same way as what is in the same way as God the son submitted himself to God the father.

They are equal in essence equally divine yet subordinate and function in that way is God the son submits to God the father doing is will, for the purpose of redemption.

The larger context effect goes back to chapter 2 and verse 13 which we study that includes the believers submission to the institutions of government and authorities it takes us.

Then in verse 18 as we've studied into the modern world of domestic servitude, the equivalent modern-day employee employer relationship which we studied. Now in chapter 3. The verb appears again in this same way wives, be submissive to your husbands to be careful here Peter is not telling wives to submit to their husbands like you submit to your employer or to your Emperor with her codes and orders and decrees.

I would certainly hope not. You might follow those orders and decrees and ordinances, but that definitely the elite of the got a marriage that that fills its rooms with precious things. The opening adverb in the same way means that the citizen and the employee and the wife and even the Lord Jesus.

As we observed is life submitted with the same motive, with the same sacred perspective for the same reason that you submitted to an institution and Emperor and employer without a higher perspective which leads you to bring glory to God. Submit with that same sacred motive and that same sacred perspective. You are ultimately then wife wives submitting in the same way that is out of love for and out of obedience to head for the exaltation of the glory of God and his wise purposes and player so you might write in the margin. The commentary where it says in the same way you could add there in the margin for the glory of God in the same way. That is, for the sake of the glory of God, be submissive to your own husbands now you might have already skipped ahead through this paragraph instead of listening mailing of said so far and and you might notice that there are six verses dealing with the wives and only one verse dealing with husbands seems lopsided six times more information and instructions given the wives then husbands. Some men might say that's because we don't need as much instruction that's not the answer.

Someone might think well because you know women love information more than men. They actually read the directions so you know that there appreciating the fact that no were still guessing. I would agree with one author. Like several of them as I prepared for this study suggested that more space is devoted to Christian wives here simply because many of them at husbands who were either indifferent or opposed to the gospel, and it definitely fits the context or doesn't it. Submitting husbands who may not be obedient to the word really is difficult and I'll tell you rather nicely over my years of ministry.

It is easily six times more likely for me to hear from a devoted Christian wife who is suffering from and I'm spiritually minded husband or unbelieving husband then the other way around. I guess exactly the problem here and today this is women want not respond to that most difficult environment how to respect their husbands were that in in that most difficult situation where there husbands provide little to respect effect. Really, this is a challenge when you see what were being told in relation wives are responding to husbands, we ought to be the kind of husbands that are are are giving wives someone the lead follow licensor giving them some example making it as easy as possible for them to obey God while Peter is speaking to all wives. I believe there is no specific group of members in the church that was more in need of warm encouragement and godly counsel and understanding these wives who now because of their faith.

It's implied, of come to Christ are married one believers very difficult situation. Perhaps not nearly as painful as a wife, who is married to a man who says he is a Christian but is spiritually indifferent, uninterested in leading I've never had a wife over 31 years of ministry companies that you know what bothers me about my husband is that he's committed to being a spiritual leader really bothers me that he was read the word what to give godly counsel just just really ticks me off. Never have had that happen. I hear the office notice.

Again, the context you wives be submissive to your husbands. Of the many of them are disobedient to the word, they may be one without a word, no more on that word less testimony next Lord's day but for today. What exactly does it mean for a wife to be submissive me just mention the word submission in our culture. Bristles with no patriarchal bigotry here you go, and even the evangelical church today. This is a bad word submission is probably one of our controversy all issues in practically speaking in the New Testament church today. Let me answer the question by first telling you, according to Scripture what submission is not submission is not based upon the belief that women are inferior in essence, morally, intellectually, emotionally or spiritually.

That would mean that Jesus is he submitted to the will of the father would be somehow deficient or inferior.

Furthermore, submission is not blind obedience.

Many men abuse this is for the thing verse in the dating of the inside the van otherwise drives submit and this is not where wife becomes a doormat for man to walk over where she is and a lot of making decisions or suggestions or exercise any management responsibility to how I can tell you that in order for the skillful management of my life. I wouldn't be here today clothing in my right mind the fact that's how other religions view submission not Christianity. Christianity does not promote subjugation, it doesn't treat a woman is a thing, it elevates her gives her dignity effective. You just sail with me long enough in this series will eventually get to her Jesus through Peter tells men that they miss use their headship and they treat their wives callously or unkindly, they might as well stop praying because God has stopped listening. Let me give you another thought. Biblical submission is then not the basis for verbal or physical abuse. In other words, if you're listening to me and your husband is physically abusing you and you're hiding the bruises contact the authorities and then let us know so that we can shepherd you and protect you and provide for you and provide counsel for your husband. You will be the first one we have provided sanctuary submission is not a free pass for violence or even bad behavior word wears me put it this way, headship is not dictatorship it is the loving exercise of divine authority under the Lordship of Jesus Christ so others would say that submission the principle of submission and the principle of headship are the result of the fall of Adam and Eve in the sin that submission and headship were never God's original design. The opposite is actually the truth Adam and Eve were created within their roles and responsibilities of headship and submission, respectively, and they had within that relationship. Perfect unity, openness, transparency and cooperation. Sin actually involve a violation of the principle of submission as Eve acted on her own independent authority in response to the tempter's offer and then Adam violated the principle of godly headship in submitting to Eve's offer.

Following the fall of Adam and Eve. God delivers to them the effects of this curse. In Genesis 3 that man is not gonna work by the sweat of the brow of the earth is not going to respond to him is gonna have to tame it.

It's going to be hard work in woman's desire will be for their husbands. Literally, her desire will be to dominate to attempt to control her husband. Genesis 316 so the battle all in marriage and in the marriage relationship came as a result of sin, cooperation turns in the competition is one author said wedlock becomes a deadlock. So at the outset of our study. What you need to understand is that the Holy Spirit through the apostle Peter is beginning to explain to us in this paragraph. What is nothing less than a radical reversal of the effects of sin and the curse is going to take us back to how it ought to be returned to the kind of relationship God intended in the beginning for a husband and wife so what is biblical submission of the Greek verb Peter uses here who protest so means to willingly rank under two willingly rank under in order to complete it's an administrative term by the way, which means to voluntarily assist in order to complete Genesis back again in chapter 2, especially verse 18, where God makes this rather startling statement where he says it is not good for man to be alone I will make him a helper suitable for him. So the concept of a divinely created assistance to complete the man is found in his creative design long before sin occurred. God effectively is saying I'm going to make Adam a help meet those him to create for him a personal assistant in every way, and the implication is that that Adam will then be able to accomplish God's purposes for his life which he would not have been able to accomplish and glorify God without her assistance. That doesn't mean by the way that a single man or woman is somehow out of the will of God, or that they can complete God's assignment for their lives.

This is simply God's creative design in general. For those who marry. This is his intention for you and for those of you who do to him. Peter is addressing here. This is one of those defining roles of the help meet the assistant. Let me illustrate it with just a simple analogy. Maybe you have an administrative assistant at work.

Maybe you have an assistant in the shop or in the store or in the office are they less valuables a person than you are they lesser in essence, are you superior to them as an individual because you have more responsibility. Are you better than they are because you make more money are are they inferior to you in character because you set their schedule.

Are you by the way closer to God than they are because there your assistant. Of course not. So likewise the husband when I thought about a husband who is superior or better or more valuable or more important or closer to God because of his role. By the way is that assistant at work really helpful to you if they never offer any ideas to you or question you or correct you, or proof you or improve what you're doing or suggest you should do it differently or tell you what you forgot to do and remind you what you need to do art those the qualities of a good assistant at work absolutely. I walked into my office on Tuesday. My administrative assistant. So what are you doing here I sit is her problem. She said you're supposed to be the airport. I miss my flight had to reschedule. Likewise, the submissive wife who voluntarily ranks under in assisting her husband will offer ideas asked questions, make corrections and improvements and suggest options and other ideas and remind you what you forgot remind you what you should be doing so, the world's idea of submission that you know your doormat. Now the Bible you Christian juvenile justice. And it is not Christianity. Their ideas very different than God's, God's idea is a voluntary selflessness submitting to a husband's leadership is a choice to complement him with your unique gifts and talents rather than compete with him so in other words, the principal and in fact the beauty to me. The beauty of biblical submission is rooted in understanding the sovereignty of God in his creative design. He didn't stop with Adam and Eve, he included you so find yourself in in that creative sovereign act of God, who knew wives what your husband would need and thus like Eve, the first wife he created. God created you with your unique gifts and talents and perspectives in order to complete in your assistance. That man which means that together you make a complete package in bringing him glory ever wondered why God puts opposites together haven't haven't you gotten old enough perhaps to see a couple you know dating knowing while they are so different they think there are a lot alike but just wait there can discover all those differences and isn't it true that all those differences that happened to be one of the most irritating things about marriage is at the same time the most during the most protecting the most balancing aspect of marriage I'll never forget a man telling me after church Wednesday how different he and his wife were in every possible way. What really provoke my attention then is he been married over 50 years and he said were still so very different. In fact, this wise, older, godly man looked at me, laughed as he said the only thing the only thing my wife and I have in common is that we were both married on the same day.

That's it.

That's it. Well it's let's wrap up RR's are introduction really today by just rehearsing together three general reminders and this will be for both husbands and wives so much. In fact, it's really kind of hard to whittle it all down to just five sermons. First, remember that you are building a marriage in a fallen world in a very real way you're trying to build by the strength and grace and wisdom of God. A marriage in a culture that is constantly trying to steal your tools eager busy trying to build something and people around you are thinking up wires or translate your screwdriver in your hamburger glue and all the nails and what what you need.

There no encouragement. The world system is the gravitational pull away from selflessness and into selfishness, which is at the root of someone saying in a marriage is a great idea, but takes too much work. In fact, monogamy is just unnatural. So all go from one partner to the next love is all about them. William Barclay wrote that submission is when a woman voluntarily chooses selflessness submission.

He writes listen to this is the death of pride will apply that to husbands later construe here submission to a husband, is the death of pride in the world is constantly gonna send you wise messages look good for you. Re: why don't you ever want to chase around something that requires the death of pride then going to make you happy.

Yes, it will because the happiest, most fulfilling moments of life are those selfless moments where your pride is crushed and humility rises to serve someone else wasn't Christ himself, fulfilling the glory and purposes of the triune God, and he humbled himself, accepting the limitations of that redemptive purpose fact he died because secondly, remember you committed yourself in marriage to a fallen sinner, you're only trying to construct a marriage in a fallen world. You committed yourself a marriage to a fallen sinner, you happen to have married a sinner and I get an amen.

Now you're very polite.

You married a sinner your sinner to that marriage is the union of two sinners and what do sinners do naturally. Sin makes us shrink our lives to it to the narrow confines of our little self defined world sin causes us to shrink our focus and are concerned of the size of our own wants and our own needs and her own feeling sin causes us to go around through life way too self-aware far too self-important. Sin causes us to be offended most by that which offends us. Sin is essentially anti-social. When author said we don't have time to love other people and we don't have time to love our own spouse because were too busy loving ourselves.

That's what sin does. That's what sinners naturally do Peter's applying. Here's this topic opens in chapter 3 that marriage is not an escape from a center marriage is an attempt to glorify God by winning that sinner to glorify God with you allowing God to demonstrate in and through you the gospel to them, just as Christ loved us while we were still sinners and a fallen spouse is God's assignment for developing and demonstrating and he begins here in first Peter chapter 3 with the wife submitting to a sinner and in so doing, demonstrating the industry of merit raise of God in daily in the message. He called submitting to a sinner.

It's from Stephen series on marriage called for better or for worse.

Stephen has this series available as a book if you're married or if you're single and considering marriage. This book provides biblical insight into the marriage relationship. During this series, we have Stephen's book available at a special price give us a call today at 86 648 Bible and we can give you information take advantage of that opportunity and then come back and join us next time. Stephen continues through this series of first Peter here on wisdom for the heart