A Word to Fathers (Part 3 of 3)

The time we encounter a specific parenting tantrum or rebellious teenagers. It's tempting to seek out a short-term solution quick fix.

But today unTruth for Life.

Alastair Begg encourages us to keep in mind the ultimate purpose of parenting need to remember that our discipline and instruction are to be shaped by the gospel teaching today from Ephesians chapter 6 verse four I give you this morning and DI NDI I three words nourishment discipline and instruction. First of all, then nourishment that the phrase here bring them up out of error that is used there, which means to rear or to raise also means to nourish you watch a young mother with their children. They have all these wonderful mechanisms is all about nourishment.

Some of it goes in the right place and some progress all over the face and some of those everywhere, but nobody would've been any doubt this is a nourishing experience note to our second word which is discipline. This nourishment involves both discipline and instruction. The word discipline here simply means child training bring them up then in the training of a child is the same word that Paul uses in second Timothy three talking about the word of God and its impact, which he says is profitable for correction, and for proof and for training in righteousness, that's the exact same verb that is used there for the discipline here. That's why some English translations translated training when we wrestle with this. We have to realize that in this respect, it is the good of our children. That is to be the motive of any exercise of punishment nor the relief of our animosity by the well-being of their souls that the reason that this is going to be engaged upon is not because it is a happy experience for the father because his is a necessary responsibility entrusted to the father in order that the child might become what God intends for her or for him to be there for it has to be expressed purposefully and sparingly and accurately.

This may be wrong but it would seem to me that anatomically. That is 1 Peculiar Pl. that seems aptly positioned for the exercise of any kind of corporal punishment, namely your posterior also known as your bottom indication that God has provided that expressly for that purpose. But it does see map doesn't see here is the quest do we believe that God who created the universe. When I say so reverently knows what he's on about, or do we believe that the United Nations charter on human rights has actually figured it out and that God the creator's had it wrong from the beginning. Do we have any reason to believe that the God was revealed himself in the provision of his only son is calling for activity in the lives of those that he is created that will undermine the very filial relationships that he has established in family life as he has ordained that is illogical to does not make sense and therefore parents have to do something with this and it really calls the question again. Namely, do I believe the Bible do actually believe the Bible is true in this area and when I do that I have to realize that there is a huge, huge difference between abusive behavior that takes delight in harming or inheriting a child and what is being humorously referred to as the powwow treatment that the parent pose and the child while's that it doesn't last very long.

It doesn't need to last very long. In fact, I've been held by one person's observation who says in relationship to this and I will move on from it. In exercising any kind of corporal discipline is number one has to be carefully considered. In other words, it is not to be answered upon in in terms of reactive anger at the same time, it should be extremely restrained our children on the rear of the go to the bedroom and show the marks left on their bodies is no need for that. And thirdly, that it should be demonstrably rest of it is punitive but it is at the same time. Rest of it restoring that which has now broken the boundaries that has created discord within the framework of the family and so on. So that because this is what the Bible says concerning discipline. We must do this, but having done that we want our children to understand that we do this because it is essential because it is biblical because it is practical because it is spiritual and we don't actually wanted to be continual. It is our sad home.

It is a sad where you find children living in a kind of cowed fearfulness waiting for the next volcanic eruption from their dad not knowing what will trigger it. Not knowing how it will be not knowing how long it will last. That is not there is no basis for that in the and then in the entire Bible. Rather, we want our children being nurtured, nourished, discipline and a loving home where laughter and joy that is grounded in the gospel and takes into account all of our faults and failings, and stupidities that somehow in that in that framework. It is, it is possible for us to function whereby the rule and exercise of discipline is the exception rather than the routine event notes 11 o'clock time for discipline as opposed to as we we haven't had to deal with anything like this for a long time. Why are we dealing with it today because that's very angry. No, because this has to be tackled nourishment, discipline, and thirdly instruction instruction. So I said to you that that that discipline, child training in the realm of conduct here now in terms of if you like conversation. That's why read from Psalm hundred and 19.

The whole emphasis of the word. The word of God being brought to bear upon the mind of a child in order to see transformation in the character of a child.

Psalm hundred 19 we read part did we have fewer law had not be my delight I would've perished in other words, the law is there, in order to constrain and to restrain so that we don't so we don't. That's why there's a huge big sign that says Cliff danger in our is something seriously wrong with so many users woo avoidance only put a sign there, why did somebody tell me that this was the result of this was for you in the Bible.

That's why you have your mom and dad, that's my dad you have responsibility and so do I to say danger danger ahead. That's why we read Deuteronomy 6 all the time these words he says to Israel are to be upon your hearts. Psalm 19 the law of the Lord is perfect and converts the soul.

The testimony of the Lord is sure, it makes wise the simple.

The statutes of the Lord are right there rejoice the heart. Our children may sound believable. One word of that but it's okay that doesn't alter anything.

I just want you to know that this world will be a lamp to your feet will be a light your path. You can trust it. These words are to be upon your hearts. Deuteronomy 11 lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul so that the influence of the word of God upon the minds of our children so as to constrain something of their believe in our understanding may then yield the benefit in behaving. We can make our children love the Bible but we can encourage our children to learn the Bible fear so I don't want them to learn until 11. The never learned educational moment militates against the whole idea of learning. Of course you're supposed to feel it or experience it or imagine what it would be like if you were a soldier in the 12th cavalry unit one 22,000 you know it is fascinating stuff you learns and histories bunk. So if you get young couples who have imbibed that within the framework of secular thinking in any bring to bear upon the Bible while they were teaching children the Bible is waiting for them to experience it. Father's father's. This extends actually be on the Bible. It means that in terms of our instruction has to be instruction given in terms of what they read in terms of what they view in terms of what they hear. Again, not a legalistic way, but it means that we have to recognize how easy it is to turn our children. As a result of the influence we have over them into little funny little people little automatons who look as though they've got everything done, but on the inside, they may be done at all. On the inside, they may just be waiting for the first chance they have done well you know how they really feel about all of this material is not be 90 or children are sinful or silly. And the reason you been given parents is because you are silly because they used to be as silly as you are now by their parents who aren't as silly as they are held to. And so the process goes catechism is not the answer either, so I thought you wanted us to do the catechism. I do find my time over again with our children. We would've been far better than this, than we have been. I don't have my time over again.

I can say something concerning my grandchildren, but is not my desk but is not just about the Kathy in this instruction, it means allowing our children to bring their questions and their concerns about every subject in the universe into a context whereby the framework of a worldview of God and his word can be brought to bear upon the issues at large. So why wouldn't you like me listening to the wrapper.

Whoever this is something wrong with rap music particularly well in the left of the discussion I what what what what is the what is the Bible actually say about gender. What is it say about friendship. What is it say about sex.

What is it say about all of these things you seek to instruct their children in this way is not simply to give them proof text for all of this while here's a verse for that. Here is a verse for that. Here's a verse for that that's okay, but unless our children is possible for us to subdue the minds of our children without educating our children to simply bring them under subjugation as subjugation that they are never persuaded off in their own hearts so consequently demands everything office and it isn't simply that what the Bible is saying here is that we need to instill in our children. This is the sort of morality of a civil society. Of course that's part and parcel of it. You should make. Make sure you have a firm handshake son okay good. Make sure you look at people in the eye when you speak to them.

Okay, good.

So now we've got all that going. We finished whole family started because what Paul is referencing here is the total moral and spiritual well-being of our children, our time is gone but let me just finish it by pointing out the way in which this instruction is bracketed.

Look at verse one begins. Children obey your parents in the Lord. Look at how it ends in verse four in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. In other words, what is being referenced here is a distinctly Christian Judy is being conveyed in the context of the gospel is not simply moralism. Our greatest listen carefully. Our greatest desire and ambition for our children more than anything else in the entire universe should be that they will come to know and love and follow Christ as their Savior and their Lord more than anything else in the entire universe writing in an earlier generation. One commentator put it like this parent should care more for the loyalty of their children to Christ than for anything besides more for this than their health, their intellectual vigor and brilliance. Their material prosperity. Their social status, their exemption from great sorrows and great misfortunes.

More than anything else is rendered.

Cotton wool all around our children to save them from great misfortune, not realizing that in the providence of God. It is through that great misfortune that they will now come to cry out to God for the Savior who require we cannot save our children, we cannot and we must not force them in to making expressions that are not there by conviction that is relatively easy to do.

Incidentally, and in passing that is one of the reasons that we baptize nobody under the age of 13 year but I never met a child with any sensitive part of toll that if you said to them, you know you. You love Jesus enough to get baptized all yeah definitely I do you find them in the 18 years of age hang around somewhere down here with no knowledge of anything that happened to them at all because it is very possible to press them into that position they love us the trust as though do what we say. By and large that's not conversion you get this. Don't you ask why you see putting our children in the context of credible Bible teaching, putting our children in the context of credible Bible teaching, from whatever source is far more important in their swimming lessons in their tennis lessons is far more important. So take advantage of being in a good church when you think about your life and I think about my life this morning, I realized that, along with many many others in my life cannot be explained apart from the influence of Bible class on Sunday school teachers who stuck with me who put up with me. You may not believe this because you see me now but I used to be thrown out of our Bible class. Not every week but but routinely for causing trouble in the place get out the egg all and I have to keep around the neighborhood until it was time for the end of the class so I could go on to my parents would know that I was home early and I'm sure that like many a teacher and are organizing a decision that nothing's happening, you know, there's no lasting benefit to this is that he doesn't even listen to a word that you're saying and sore. No many a child will finally acknowledge that some of the greatest influences of being in context that he never really imagined for significance. It it really takes a church to help in doing this it does II think about that particular Bible class. I may have told you before, but on the day that I went there I was nine years old for my first attempt endeavor. I'd already been to church in the morning. I was going to church in the evening and then of any option and my father had decided be good for me to go in the afternoon as well and so after we finish lunch she drove me drove me to the Clarkson holes in suburban Glasgow any part to the bottom of the stairs that led up and he said go up the stairs and go in there I said I want to go to were not having a conversation about it. Go up the stairs so I went up the stairs and I waited to see if he drove away because I figured if he drove away. I go back down the stairs but he waited because he knew that I was waiting, so he never he never drove away. He never drove away and so I'm stuck. So I waited silent in and I loved I actually did I hear I hear you young parents asking their kids that would you like to have lunch. What we talking about. Would you like to have Larry I understand you will be kind to the they have to have lunch but if they say no to that for 17 days in a row where you want to do with the emaciated little creature not only lunch today is now. Would you like to go by what would you like to go to youth group. Would you like to come to evening church. No no no no no. Are we ever going to go unless the father has the guts and let's listen if you don't do this is because you don't believe it, or because you don't have the courage to enforce it. Face it, that's the fact. Do you care should care care enough to let them know that the gospel transcends everything touches everything forgiveness and faith. The everyday events of life brought under his control, and it takes grace takes grace takes patience, takes patience of me when you think about your children when they're tiny when your your that thing where I mean I see the young ladies on the plane now. I just I could burst into tears thinking about them, but they have the they have the bucket that they have that big pail that you have to sit your child in and then they have one bag over here with diapers and another bag over here and something house and it's light all all and if you don't, whatever you do see the you know look after them while they're young because it doesn't last very long.

You know you're about to get a significant punch in the nose. From that lady out target because from where she says this thing is going on forever. There is no way out of this. This creatures only 13 months old. I got two more and that's and a husband. There is no possibility of surviving this takes grace.

It takes patience. This is in stock market terms. This is not daytrading.

This is long-term investment's amazing how a monstrous four-year-old who is constantly loved and disciplined can become a charming young adult by her late teens, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord a high and important calling for fathers from Alastair big Truth for Life. Alastair will close today in prayer in just a minute, so please keep listening well as we reflect on the difficulty that the global virus has brought into our world in the past few months it has been truly extraordinary to see how God has used this ministry to bring hope and peace and truth to people all around the world who are hurting.

We've heard stories of those who have been encouraged and established in their faith.

During very difficult times and it's a reminder to us of just how important it is for Bible teaching to be available for people free of charge reaching in the hearts and homes all around the world. So keep in mind anytime you partner with Truth for Life. That's what you're giving accomplishes to show our gratitude for your support today will you become a true partner or you make a generous one time donation would love to send you a book that comes recommended by Alastair.

It's a book titled discovering the good life. The author of the book Tim Savage reminds us that though we can sometimes feel like were simply surviving on this journey of life.

God actually intends for us to drive Jesus is the central figure in this book, but interestingly, Tim has built it around the theme of three trees found in Scripture trees that point us beyond survival to the riches of God's grace available to us in Christ. If you want to see what God intends for us is the abundant life. This is a book we think you will benefit from requester copy when you donate today for when you make your first gift is a monthly true partner. Visit Truth for Life.org/true partner or call 888-588-7884 and on behalf of everyone listing today. Thank you for your support in a closing prayer.

Here's Alastair. We thank you father for the Bible and we pray that as we consider its claims that it will turn us to the subject of the Bible, namely to Jesus and that we as fathers will first come to trust in the Christ. We then want to convey lovingly to our children.

Help us Lord, we pray for Christ sake, Bob Lapine join us again tomorrow as we continue our study in the book of Ephesians called life together.

The Bible teaching of Alastair Beck is furnished by Truth for Life for the Learning is for Living