Honoring Mother

Philip Yancey in his book what so amazing about Grace tells the story he tells of a friend whose monitor gone through tumultuous times. One night George past the breaking point. He pounded the table on the floor. I hate you. He screamed at his wife.

I won't take it anymore. I thought enough. I won't go on. I won't let it happen.

No, no, no. Several months later my friend woke up in the middle of the night and have strange sounds coming from the room where his two-year-old son slept. He pounded down the hall stood for a moment outside his son's door and sugars ran through his flesh. He could not draw breath in the soft voice of the two-year-old was repeating word for word with precise inflection, the argument between his mother and father. I hate you I want take it anymore. No, no, no, families are wonderful, but families also can have a lot of problems can and is very difficult, as in the raising children in the society I think is always been difficult is what I have quoted from Psalm 127 unless the Lord builds the house, we labor in vain.

However skilled we think we are however much we love our spouses leather parents lover children. I hope all of us here realize that we need the Lord's help this Mother's Day want to remind you what God says to families such as should subject, but I want us to stand and read together. The fifth commandment with stand together. It comes from Exodus 28 verse 12, one short verse 10 commandments.

Here is the fifth commandment.

Let's read it together. Honor your father and mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. Thank you. Please be seated.

The principal place for the spiritual, moral and emotional training of our children is within the family is in the family where we first. I trust we do experience unconditional love and care and protection and companionship is within the family, where we begin to understand what it means to be masculine and feminine is within the family, where we learn how to communicate and how to resolve conflicts and differences is within the family, where we first learned about respect and authority is within the family, where we develop our sense of humor. I thought that I know exactly what kind of humor will make by brothers life.

Could we have the same strange sense of humor. Learning it within her family and is within the family. I trust we will learn to love and care for others. If you have your Bible open it with me to Paul's letter to the Ephesians, Paul is going to quote the very commandment that we read the fifth commandment of the 10 Commandments in Ephesians chapter 6 are the contacts as Paul is giving instructions to the family and he's giving instructions to the wives and husbands. I know he turns to children not remember this would've been a letter received by the church at Ephesus and can you imagine the church being gathered together, and there but I was one of the elders is standing up and reading this letter received from Paul and children were there.

Wonderful to have children in the church as we have at Calvary church children yes need to be in church and can you imagine how these children of all ages. We did listen carefully, as no the spirit of God through the apostle Paul addresses them, but hear what God says at the children.

Here in Ephesians 6 verse one children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right on your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the lands father's father's here listening, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6 verses 1 to 3. I want to say this Mother's Day father, your mother on their your mother why should we honor our mother. First of all, it is a command of God, God tells us we read it from the Old Testament and reread it from the New Testament we are to honor our parents in particular this Mother's Day I'm saying to all of us.

This is what God wants is is a command of God honoring your mother the human heart is naturally rebellious.

But if were not taught to respect and regions in the home is very unlikely that we will respect and on those and honor others. As such as schoolteachers or police officers or employers or church leaders today all of us need to listen to the command of God. It is a command I'm emphasizing that this is a command of God. This is not optional.

This is for you and for me. Honor your father and your mother. I grew up in a large family. I didn't always agree with my parents sometimes is probably all Christian children think sometimes I thought my parents were too strict and possibly sometimes they were and I would try to argue with them. They rarely do. My great frustration when are you back. My mother didn't argue. Occasionally, my father might've, but he didn't said he would say something like this to me something I didn't like to hear him say John whether you going to learn to do what you're told. It was a good question. It was a penetrating question. It was a well constructed question. The question which I needed to hear John when you going to learn to do what you're told you my friends love me. I knew they wanted to guide me in the paths of righteousness. Sometimes I find that difficult. That's why we need a command is in the which is optional. MS arousal givers on the boat but I'm going to choose and asked what I will obey them and analyze what I want because is a good all particulars your teenager. The comes a point where you think that you know more than your parents know will be your parents, John, this is a command of God, all of God's commandments are wives. This is God saying that God your creator and God is all wise.

God is good. We were singing about.

This is a good command as will see obey the commands honor your mother. This is a command of God. Secondly, this is a command with a promise. Look at verse one again of Ephesians 6 children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise here is the promise that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land of Israel obey this command, the nation would prosper in the promised land that would be a stable society with strong families experiencing the Lord's blessing. This provision is protection his blessing will accompany those who obey this command. Life will go well with you.

If you obey the command. The clear implication is if you disregard the command life will not go well with you that it may go where no with you. Looking at the broad late when the family is strong, the nation is strong One Life to go out with you. I do on their your parents on your mother obey your parents who can quantify the pain. When children are raised in homes where they're not loved some of you were raised in such homes. Think of the confusion in homes where parents do not model Christ to the children. Think of homes where moms and dads are not instructing their children and the importance of the word of God. Think of the tremendous pain. When children rebel against parents were heartache depends, and so the importance of the command is emphasized. Yes, it is a command even if it didn't go well with me. I could still a bit but God is so good God is, who is garden doesn't choose his commandments in a whimsical arbitrary way. They are wise, therefore our good life will go well with you.

If you listen to God and if you honor your parents. In fact, you will be blessed by God.

One of the principles that I tried to follow in my life on this matter of honor. Gases talk to my parents and then for Samuel to move our starting. There's a wonderful statement by God is a statement with a promise. Those who honor me, I will honor.

If you honor your parents. If you honor your mother God will honor you.

Those who honor God. Those who obey God, God will honor Jesus put it this way in the Gospels.

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added to your life will go well with you.

If you seek first the kingdom of God. If you obey God. If you are humble if in particular you obey this command, there is a promise. Life will go well as a command, with the promise that wonderful that God gives us a promise. In this command. Thirdly, this is a command which is the right thing to do.

Ephesians 6 verse one children, obey your parents in the large and people say why should I obey mom and dad, you don't know them that unreasonable sometimes and sometimes they're very strict.

Sometimes Paul says well is the right thing to do for this is right.

Paul is instructing children to obey their parents, for this is right children.

Students listen it's the right thing to do.

There's a natural law.

The work here a lot written in our hearts as well as in the 10 Commandments. People throughout the world know it is the right thing to do it the right thing to do for children to honor their parents is the right thing to do to obey your parents and children, you know that student, you know it teens you know that I knew that I knew it was the right thing to do. We had on Sunday night or next-generation children singing in the took some Scripture beginning within went through to Scripture and then with after one of the ones they sign was Colossians 3 verse 20 unit is in the English standard version.

Paul is writing again children obey your parents in everything. It was everything I sometimes struggled with, but that's another point.

True humility child regions comes in obeying where you don't want to obey. That is a real task is easy to obey your parents when you agree with them.

No children, obey your parents and everything for this pleases who the Lord, yet it pleases your mom and dad, but more importantly it pleases the Lord. You want to please God, your nature old rebar you want to please God, your in 18-year-old young woman you want to please God, obey your parents obeying your parents is more important than your self-expression when you obey your parents, God is pleased with your parents. They usually go to church you obey them you go to church there. The spiritual leaders in the home. I least I hope they are, they choose not you when you worship. Do you realize that the Lord Jesus here on out in his incarnation could say I always do the things that please the father. Here is the perfect son giving us the perfect example in every single detail our Lord Jesus Christ, please the father.

In fact, Luke tells us when the Lord was 12 years old. Some of you remember the story of them going to the temple and so on. But look to verse 51 says this he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them.

Here is the Lord of glory, God himself.

God incarnate. When he is here on earth, as these are young boy of 12 years old to know what he does to to Mary and Joseph. He is submissive to the and his mother treasured up all these things in her heart.

Proverb says that a wise son makes a glad father. You recall that wonderful saying of the Lord's baptism when the heavens opened and the father said of his son.

This is my beloved son in whom I well pleased. You want to please God will be your parents. I sometimes have young people come to me and I'm privileged that they want to talk to me about the future what college you go there who to marry, should I go on this missions trip are all kinds of exciting things and they want to do the Lord's will know this is God's will for you, obey your parents is that this design very exciting, that's the test.

Why are you wanting God's will for your regarding where you are going to go to school or what kind of career who you're going to marry and you are not obeying the command and not doing the Lord's will in this very, very, very important aspect.

This training school for the rest of your life. You know it's the right thing to do on the your mother do the right thing. There's another reason for the command. This is a command with benefits. Yes, all go well with you in particular, if you honor your parents, your children are much more likely to honor you when you get older as a general rule is in the my parents took care of my maternal grandmother after my grandfather died she would come to to leave the little village in the height of winter for about three or four months and come and stay with us during that time and then for seven or eight months of go back to her own home and then as HK Mandan health situations and you got a bit forgetful, and so on, and she came to stay with our family.

I had moved died. By that time, but she would be there when I would would visit now let me ask you, is the fact that my mother cared for her mother. Does that make it more likely that my brothers and I will care for my mother. Of course it is. We saw that model we saw modeled in her own home.

Our parents caring for my maternal grandmother.

We watched it we saw the love sometimes it wasn't easy in the home there. It was is another story. Once there was an old man who was in declining health and whose hands trembled because he no place to live. He moved in with his son's family.

The son's wife wasn't exactly thrilled with the new arrangement, and she especially hated it at the dinner table when he ate. He often spilled his food.

Finally, in her exasperation, she insisted that he ate his meals in a corner of the kitchen. He began to eat alone and was served food in a bowl and then one day his hands were shaking so much that he dropped his ball on the floor, spilling his food that just does it northernmost Clinton.

You're going to eat like a pig. You will figure like a pig. She made a wooden trough and told him that you would have to eat out of the wooden trough so we did that one afternoon a few days later the room is little boy came in the house excited about something he had made good mama.

He cited I made a trough to feed you and daddy.

I love when you get to be oldest grandpa.

She didn't say a word, just began to cry and from that day forward.

The old man ate his meals at the table with the rest of the family. If that story sounds vaguely familiar, it is because a person of his or not I'm since the 1800s. Adapted from the Brothers Grimm stories. Yes, there are many reasons for the commands.

This is a good command command of God command with a promise mind with benefits. I command that if you obeyed it will go well with you. Honor your mother this Mother's Day. Not just for a day. Of course, before all of life to honor your mother. Now you say how can we do that. Some ways to honor your mother first of all, this is repetition. Honor your mother by obeying her opening. We ought to give our parents respect and significance. What does it mean to honor well.

This is an interesting word to honor our parents is to give way to their position as parents. They are our parents. Proverbs 1 verse eight. Solomon says here, my son, your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching. Listen again to Proverbs 7, Solomon is writing to his son.

Proverbs 7 verse one my son, keep my words and treasure out my commandments with you, keep my commandments and live keep my teaching as the apple of your lawyer. How do you honor your parents, children, students will be yes.

Children are to be the parents, not the other, not parents obeying the children as some of you have decided I read the writer on just this past Friday. This was in Australia thought this trillions. You better, but there's a sexuality expert who would whatever that means. Call Dan Carson and she said how important it is and I saw the little clip to teach a child. According that they had response matters from a young age. This was a lesson.

My parents did not know about and what does that mean she gives an example here is a little baby. We dedicate this on little babies and this might surprise some of you before you change the diaper of the baby.

You have to ask the baby for permission because the babies got rights okay.

How does that work that I thought the only way I would do that was if I was changing the diaper and was really messy. I would say to the child. You do want mommy to change it on your mommy.

I mean he says we think it is ridiculous, but isn't that a move in our society to talk so much about rights. Everyone's got rights, little Johnny's guys rights. God looks at the another way, Judy, your responsibility, of course were to respect a child to love a child. Of course, that goes without without saying, but the responsibility is given to the parents, the child has to obey the parents, not the other way around. Jordan Peterson, the bestseller of 12 rules for for life, not a Christian but but but but fascinating. I think he's got a chapter headed he gives he gives this chapter, a very interesting title as one of the 12 rules he says do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike him again and consult with them. Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them, and he sees he's Canadian. He sees today's parents as stratified by their children court simply paralyzed by the fear that they will no longer be liked or even loved by their children if they chastise them for any reason can imagine can imagine my dad saying John needs discipline but all you might not love me he might not like me and so I wonder, is a professor of psychology, University of Toronto. He believes the children. Surprise, surprise. Need structure rules and discipline. He writes children are perfectly capable of attempting to subsist on hotdogs jewel chicken fingers and Froot Loops if doing so will attract attention, provide power or shield them from trying anything you instead of going to bed wisely and peacefully. Children will fight nighttime unconsciousness until they are staggered by fatigue.

There also perfectly willing to provoke adults while exploring the complex contours of the social experiment, but we don't need a professor of psychology to tell us that do. The Bible tells us that throughout Scripture the pattern is for parents to teach the children the word of God for this Paul say here to father's inverse floor of the Ephesians 6 don't provoke your children to anger, of culture to respect don't be abusive, don't manipulate, don't control them. But here's a positive bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord and then children are to honor their parents by obeying them when your children, your parents speak to them speak to you listen to respect them on the obey them. God has placed them in a position of authority over you and can I say always always speak respectfully to your parents and about your parents.

There's something that doesn't seem right. Does it when you hear someone the parents are not there. Speaking in a despising mean-spirited dude way up by their mom and dad that bother you. It bothers me.

One of the things that I began to get to know good night.

One of the things I quickly find out about her was that she respected her parents and she spoke well of her parents were they perfect know her mother didn't speak English, which did help sometimes. But I still fell out with her, and when occasion she loved her parents.

She spoke well of them.

Here she was, this young woman from a different culture and when I introduced her to my parents and to my family which were very, very different from her cultural center. She showed respect and grew to love them I thought that is a good thing for young woman is you say well your fortune good in your fortune let my parents what were terrible little unbelievers.

I understand there's abuse of 10, and I understand that not everyone comes from the whole kind of home that I came from and some of you come from terrible homes where you have been abused and for your parents didn't love you but still as you live in their home. You are unless your parents are asking you to do something against Scripture. You are to obey them in the Lord of asking you to do something wrong. Don't do that because it's the right thing to do is the truth that many people wreck their life's because the rebel against their parents. They defined appearance. Think of it this way young people God chose your parents.

I didn't choose my mom and dad had no control over it. You didn't choose who your parents are, I understand are not perfect but if you think there badly. Karen could imagine. I often thought that okay everything my parents are visiting. When you look around and think on very thankful that's not my dad not stop my mother and God choose is your mother and father for you.

Of course they're not perfect of course you're going to disagree with them sometimes. Of course they make mistakes. Of course, are frustrated with you. Sometimes, of course, they lose their temper with your sometimes part here is still the injunction children will be your parents, let me say this, we are no longer to obey our parents. Once we are married and leave home that I understand in some cultures that's true even when someone's marriage and that they they still are under the authority day of their of their own parents and these parents try to tell you what kind of life you live in by the didn't come from that culture I think is an un-biblical pattern. What does the Bible say in marriage for this cause a man shall leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. A new unit is being farmed. The day I got married in the eyes of God. I was a leader of my home and it was not for my my father was known for my mother ordered me to do certain things. I had now set up under God. A new unit, a family unit that is the biblical way and can I say to parents who have gotten children who are married and have their own homes, stones don't try to control. I understand your wise men you may have the privilege of them asking you for advice is a wonderful thing but it's their home decisions have to be made. It is true I'm always to honor my mother. I still honor my mother but I don't obey her. If she were to tell me to do something that I didn't agree with. I would say no mom, and certainly I have to understand that as a married man. The top human relationship in my life is no longer my parents is my wife.

If you're married man wipes your talk relationship is to your spouse, so if anyone interferes in your marriage even apparent that you love dearly.

You got to say I understand what you're saying. I understand you think this is good advice but this is what we have chosen.

We have prayed about this and this is what we are doing so we all her mother by obeying her.

Secondly, we honor our mother by loving her. It's in the home will be forced to experience love. I hope you came from a home when you love most of us have had parents who loved us a sense of belonging. This moms and dads make sure your children are left. It's amazing how in the busyness of life.

We can minimize their children got a great sense of personal security and stability and well-being from the home and use of the great privileges. We dedicated these beautiful children today that they are being raised in homes where they are loved and for their care for where their love irrespective of their fibrils irrespective of their faults and even when I disagreed with my parents are never diluted for one split second that they didn't love me. So one of the ways we honor mother is by loving her today. Give your mother a big love big make sure make sure your mother knows but you love is around you knows that when the last tally, tell your mom but you never should maybe old, my mother will be 93 next month and to tell my mother see her next month, Lord willing, will be the first thing I say to her mom. I love you. Your mother's overtime today call her and tell her how much you appreciate her, tell her much you love it. Don't take that for granted and you say well I don't have a good relationship with my mother. I understand maybe she's a very poor mother. Maybe she's a very compelling Curtis person. Maybe you're very compelling Curtis child right.

If you have wronged her teller so please forgive me if she's wronged you the quick to forgive, demonstrate your love for your mother is wonderful to know that when our Lord was on the cross and dying in the diner. His mother and he commended his mother to John. Love your mother.

Thirdly, lastly, honor your mother by caring for her in her old age. This is true for for those of us who are older yes were always to honor our mother and that doesn't stop when we get married and we leave it on the home where always to honor our mother, irrespective of our of their age programs. 23 unit is this verse Proverbs 23 verse 22. Listen to your father who gave you life is good is listen to your father.

He gave you life and his do not despise your mother when she is old never ever been embarrassed by her mother to get a bit old but decrepit. The dementia looked quite as healthy, not quite. This active fish once was. Don't despise your mother.

The Scriptures say when she is old, we maybe parents ourselves, but were always to honor our parents as a say when Jesus was on the cross he requested the disciple John to take care of his mother, woman will hold your son and John took Mary into his own home and left her.

Would you expect anything else from the perfect son in the tragic when so many people set aside their parents when they get old forgotten that even the smartest, if you know anything about retirement homes, you will know that there is a group of people elderly man and woman in these homes who are rarely visited by anyone tragic, tragic, that is not what God wants. Honor your parents and honor your prayer, your mother by taking care of her in their declining years. You see your mother, beginning to be less able to do things make it clear to her that you and your siblings. If you have any are going to take care of her and her declining years. I'm not saying you can all take it into your own.

That may not be practical, but you're going to do all you can to honor your mother and care for your mother, as she gets older. Think of the insanity of an elderly person may have when they wonder what's going to happen to me.

Perhaps they bear very little savings and then there very concerned about health problems and practical problems and they they sense the mind is beginning to go wonderful to have loving children who say a word. Mom were going to make sure you're taking care of with its taking them into your own the home with her is making arrangement for some other home and assisted living retirement home or nursing home, whatever it may be, but Scripture reminds us that we are to honor our parents by supporting them financially member the fantasies in Mark chapter 7 instead of financially supporting their parents. They said trouble getting into. The Lord is a gift and Jesus said, none of them do that. Paul says in first Timothy five families have a responsibility to their widowed mother's to support them financially is villagers should do that. Yeah, the church may have the responsibility is your responsibility for my mother is not the church she attended in Scotland, but are myself and my brothers. It's our responsibility. She is our mother. This is the way that we honor him this command to honor our parents still stands today, would you think about it does apply to you. This affects all of us thousand when you hear it and will you. It was a thought of theirs. I thought you know will come short, there's no perfect families there's no perfect parents. There's no perfect sons or daughters human love is never perfect. All of us of sure as we reflect on our relationship with her parents with her siblings with her children with grandchildren. All of us here.

I would think have some regrets. We realize we don't do as we should, because were falling people love fall short by want to remind you of the gospel present with him and John.

The gospel is the gospel tells us that we do have a perfect loving heavenly father.

You may have had the worst father in Charlotte who was mean, who neglected you was abusive, but when they tell you that God the father is a perfect father and that he loves us unconditionally with a perfect love and in his grace he sends one into the world, who is the only perfect son, our Lord Jesus Christ because it is only Jesus who perfectly fulfilled the fifth commandment. He's the only human being who walk this, who fulfilled the fifth commandment perfectly, who always honored his father who always did the things that pleased him and God sends him into this world because all of us without exception here have broken the commandments not just the fifth commandment by the other commandments as well and what is God's remedy for that to judge others in the say you should've known better. Yes, in a sense, we should've known better but we are falling short to live. We have sinned and come short of the glory of God and God in his grace sends our Lord Jesus Christ to rescue us and to take our sins including the sins of the breach of the fifth commandment as we have disobeyed our parents as we have rebelled against them is we've not always raise our children in the fear and admonition of the Lord and we've not provided the homes that we should have instead of wallowing in our guilt. I want you to receive the grace of God and to know that whatever home. You came from. That is a perfect family. The family of God. But God loves you what Christ came to reteam. You who took your sins on his body on the tree, so that in Jesus Christ there can be a new beginning and that you can have a new family because Jesus said this John said of the Lord as many as received him, to them he gave the right to become the children of God, even to those who believe in his name that we are welcomed into this family into this eternal family and much as I appreciate my physical family.

The Monroe family. I appreciate a thousand times more a million times more the family of God is the most Monroe family is not perfect family is a broken family is like your family is like every family, but God in his grace provides in Jesus Christ love and mercy and forgiveness where you can answer this family to have God as our father who loves you perfectly.

Christ who loves you perfectly.

The Holy Spirit who calms and empowers you to live for Jesus Christ. In May, then we who are followers of Jesus filled with the spirit of God loving God, receiving his lame that love be reflected to others, including certainly including our own family, because the commandment still sent honor your father and your mother.

Help us to do that today we pray we come short, we feel, but thank you for this clear word from you. Thank you that you see our brokenness and you see our sin you sent Christ into this world to transform us to forgive us and to help us. I pray for the moms and dads here today.

I pray for children. Pray for students to pray for each of our homes. I pray for those who are single who live on their own and ask that each one of us will understand the wonder of the family of God that my child of God and that for all of eternity. Strengthen us father open our hearts to receive Christ.

We pray in his name.

It meant