How to Receive Difficult Conversations; click here to listen

Jesus masculine. Many losing life feels more like a losing battle for last is my domicile. This is pretty rough. But I managed no opposition for will be laid out for a while and I want to give a hand. I can tell you anything that you need to know you understand what should be my assistant succumbed the practices in the sit on the bench with games me me… Of phonic shade show up at the games on time practices where should I got myself sued. Darren got a wing dinner. I had married Nancy and that you're sober on my wife's I sent what is my thinking that my knowledge about basketball you can drink fire you smelly traceable to hear that your embarrassing welcome to messenger the confusion will be when you look you will commune with something to talk about tonight with a wing dinner was so quick I would wait to use that says removing Hoosiers and will be talking about tonight is a continuation of last week's topic on difficult conversations.

Last week we focused on how to initiate those in this week with no talk a lot more about how to receive those.

And honestly I don't know which ones harder time driving you yeah the one you knows, you know when you've got to deliver that piece of news, whatever that may be, but the other one is catches you completely off guard. Often that wow I didn't know this was, and then it it it it's a shocker so the older I get, the more I as I reflect back on how many of those kind of conversations I've been hit with over the years and it's a fascinating journey you can afford to be shot on the phone from Manassas, Virginia. We have Al out the user doing well.

Actually, I will hold forgetting the pursuit just my River went in the world. So this this topic of difficult conversations is hard sometimes to receive them. No probably. I think harder than having the talk when you walk away from it from the talk you're giving no your heart is for that person. When you walk away from receiving a talk like that. You're just confusing you're trying to figure things out. You usually don't think the best of that person, sometimes quite often not in our times are questioning what was their motive that clip, it's beginning to show you listen to Jean Hackman's character and in if you seen the movie it's it's a really good movie.

If you haven't, please watch it. It's it's up road is really family-friendly lines about Indiana and so I guess I'm going place in Sam's heart that is nothing better that's unpopular to say in the light just when you listen to that you hear Jean Hackman's character really is showing love to him but he doesn't really have shooter doesn't have have the ears to receive a test and that that's often the case, about one you told me about this topic immediately ran through my mind what what I now look at is a fairly conversation of when I found out I had cancer that I had had a these tumors but I did were tumors I just thought they were sores and they did a biopsy at the dermatologist and so I was supposed to get the results, and they called me on a Friday afternoon and they said? We have your results from your biopsy. You need to come in and at the time I I ram a Chrysler store over hero point Boulevard I thought it was a big shot sounds like I'm a busy man. You just need to tell me what's going on.

I said no sir we this kind of news we really prefer that you come in and we be able to discuss this nice, big boy. Just tell me what is it I've got and I said well you have lymphoma in the course being totally ignorant. I have no idea what what what's lymphoma. And they said that's cancer of the lymph system. Oh, I'll be right there is a matter of light just a millisecond everything I was no longer a big shot in anybody.

You know it just it really took me to a completely different place in the and you have a feeling that that's where shooter found himself like I had no idea that this would come between me and my sons name of the love that he had between the game and a son, and all that was involved in units true, and I think that when you get in those conversations like the one we heard from Hoosiers at some point if you're receiving that you have to say okay what is that person's motive was her motive to get something out of it was her motive to manipulate me was her motive really good towards me. That's we can start begin to hear some of the true thousand.

Think about this topic and think about looking at the other person times you said okay I don't like what I'm hearing, but I got a trust that other person's heart towards me and talk with my father doing the talking and I knew he was right. We talk about the duality within man knowledge we have in the flesh and the knowledge we have in the spirit. My spirituality was very low so I heard it in the flesh, and I knew it was right down but I couldn't.

I didn't know how to make the changes that he wanted me to make an and I sat there just confounded that you know he's given me the hard discussion about this is where you are. This is where you need to be, but I just didn't know how to make changes so I was lost on me to just come across as you tend to go through the list I do. Almost like a grief cycle unity of anger to the point of anger passes. He starts okay what can I learn from this.

What's the truth. Where can I go with it New Mexico to get a clip with its from the movie Fun with Dick and Jane will listen to this and just listen to how his demeanor changes as he begins to accept the truth of the situation when he didn't always see it that way.

Sure, it seems that when financial bounce back longer than expected natural process today. They can do that you should start thinking of accepting something a little bit VP know to be 15 years ago VP ship if I step back now work for some months.

Come on stage with Billy is looking at the glass half full text standing in her house pumping like we sold our house today. We would actually it was churning in my gut is also the relationships I just spent his whole life just so much to laugh about the situation is not funny but obviously the conversation with hilarious and I again I have a purse full of it when Chrysler payment did the audit and the dealership.

You know, the auditor came in my office is one of those.

What we need to talk talk you know when he sits down and he said you're in a pickle. Gilmore is a deer checking account showing $650,000 more in it than you have an and I was almost like a similar moment like what it and actually it turned out to be over a million that was gone that had been you know and and everything changed in a flash and its it's a really difficult place, but honestly he was there to try to help me work through something that was the truth that I clearly did not state but at the time I thought he was the you're this guy was out to destroy me. There's not you know that was completely his motives were definitely suspect you you you listen to this and I was cc a transition, you talk about. You go from where you think it this one place and then you have the realization that another thing is you listen to it when he begins to believe that not believe any begins to admit he Artie kinda knew something was going on. Often when were honest with herself. We kinda know there's something going on and maybe not in that situation you described. There times when people come to us and want to talk to us yell muskets now and then it when the need to talk to you. Try to get defensive. You try to handle another way to look back and talk about how you really handle that what you do with that we get some news honestly want to hear that this is coming from God. You don't how to interpret that walking back here just few minutes and go to mask injury rated outdoor if you like it more divisive. Some of our blogs and I will be glad to see you back here on the baseball field. Single decision can change again for men with prostate cancer single decision can change his entire life. This is Joe Torre. All I chose surgery less aggressive approach called active surveillance might be the best choice for you. Ask your doctor about the genomic test that may help you make the right decision. Learn more in your prostate your decision.com public service message from men's health network zero here. I think my wife thinks it before winter break. We played a clip from a movie called Fun with Dick and Jane and it's a comedy units.

When the dark comedies were sent you some things that happen in life. That's not much fun it just a little side note when things are fine, very funny as her son speaks Spanish or they does English is always with the babysitter who speak Spanish you know this is kind of sad but funny at the same time. When you listen that clip and we talked about earlier. Something in that clip that really kinda spoke to you about how we handle something clip always look at the man what. Part of the body with the mind when I think of Hoosiers I look at the truth in that.

I can't think of a name shooter shooter problem with it when he was younger. The game was tied they were down by one and he took a last second shot missed it in his vision of himself was a loser, so he drank and he was afraid to give up the bottle because he was afraid the reality would surface that he was a loser fighting you know something with his body, but when we look at Dick and Jane. We look at the mind and I live in denial and his wife revealed it through the number she can show him and reveal the truth to so we talk about spiritually. That's the most difficult part because that reality is when you reconcile things with God and that the most important piece the rest of it will fall in the place and time, but the best first step reconcile with God to do for me. I'm not a very smart man. Now that is very good. Yet sometimes we just get it taken say what's really causing this. When you look in the mirror. We can say is there something here. I need to deal with running the movie Hoosiers. But she does have a bit of a change of heart for a while and something more happens. But he's able to do that because he looks back he says I know the coach. His heart was good towards me. He wasn't trying to do anything here wasn't trying to get one up or get me to do something I don't want to do. He was calling me out to the place of really his glory shooter does no basketball in that movie better than probably anybody around maybe even better than the coach.

In some ways, so he's calling out to this place. It of his glory and an shooter can't really accept that he wants to believe it, but he wants to kinda stay in the background something and won't letting the past in order to go to clip here from a movie called the lion King, and as you listen to this conversation going. Listen to Simba as he tries to accept what is really the truth but it's hard for them to do all go back when you hear that we could display that clip. That clip is amazingly and in so many ways and not.

No pun intended, like I did a lot of just that original statement that you know that's only my reflection, I don't see any goes. Look closer because your father is in you and you know that's one of my biggest moments from the masculine journey was to understand that in the image of God.

There is a glory that I was given that every human being has and if you look close enough in the mirror, you know, you will begin to see that which is his God and remembering that and finding that place is a really difficult thing and that the challenges Satan has been trying to knock that down I knew from the moment that you been on the planet and he's done everything he can to we call it whack a mole because every time you begin to stand up and and and and and act like godson. That's when he's coming after you with the persecution and the interesting thing is he is trying to get you to believe that God's heart sped toward you and your own heart is bad and if think if you can buy either side of that lie, then that's a place of misery, tumbling and put you in a place we can't trust the heart of others. Right you.

God sometimes sends people in our lives to remind us.

Sometimes he sends people in our lives to give us a little bit truth, even we don't want to hear it is we need to hear it. I think back about the clips we've used nine a lot of stuff we talk about unmasking journey is shooter that has brokenness and that makes him unable to hear the truth. Unable to have a difficult conversation is is looking at it through the lens of his brokenness, which starts to let that down.

You can start to hear the truth and you can start to move towards healing on about you. It sounds a lot about my story just like that. And then there are situations that come up hard things in life that really just can knock your feet out from under him losing everything, losing jobs he had for years losing relationships and in the world tries to steal those things from you, but after that if you watch a movie fun with Dick and Jane they really truly find life later on in the movie, but they have to go through that hardship to get there and after he can accept the truth of the situation and he can really move to a place where he can pass the healing in more into that glory to talk about as comical to think that his son had because of his childlike heart you know he was loving the dirt wasn't in the grass that EE could have that childlike spirit like dirt. As you know, that's what it is because aggressors got been repossessed.

What you do what you do if a difficult conversation is somebody trying to manipulate you, and we didn't really touch on that. How do you handle those things is a way that you can just say okay what I do with this here.

I guess for me and I look at it and say well I know the parts of it I got a not take on this truth but still in it.

God is there something here for me. Is there something in the way of responding with this person. Is there something that I need to face in the mirror and if not, help me to walk through that lashing out at that other person is going to fix anything in's and sometimes it you find yourself needing to go after the other person's glory as their friend even though you see the manipulation to go and just last Friday, I found myself in that very position and God led me to pray with that person right there on the phone and it changed every that what was completely adversarial because I wasn't responding to the manipulation. When God got involved it. It amazed.

I'm still amazed that that prayer is changed everything. Now you start to say something, everything.

I'm probably really talk about a link on the fabric of time until your reconciled with God is in you start to live that out. There's a wrinkle in the fabric of your personality. The duality where you can't truly be yourself because you're caught in a place that cannot you it's not the father living three. That's one of the things I love about the three of us because Robby is no Rob you talk about how we are made in the image of God but were all like little bitty pieces of a merely come together and when the three of us. You know are talking with Vinnie and with Dennis as well. I see Robby that unconditional love who you are where you are lobby seizure glory for me.

I see somebody attentional.

I see exactly what they could do they live it out. You have incredible way of bringing that out in people and in lifting them up and we start talking about being manipulated. If you know who you are, what your potential is within the realm of your spirituality with God the father. Just as Robby lived out it doesn't matter the somebody's trying to manipulate you.

What matters is you after their heart you care because they're manipulating you they're not living out his father is in them. That's what Robby did.

Even after the glory he went back and love them unconditionally, so you gotta be able to have the truth seeking find out the lies that I know that there's times that the enemy likes these people that we love you use his voice so to speak and and that makes it hard to hear you hear someone say something that you kinda been feeling that your whole life and honestly that's probably not as much from that person as it is the enemy trying to get you to react trying to get it to buy into that and so that difficult product conversation may not be an actually what they're saying that fighting through what they're saying and moving back towards the truth, asking God to step in and intercede and give you truth in it so you can hear what you need to hear through his his love. Have a great thing you'll hear what I'm not that happen more often than not conversation people don't hear what you're saying they here with the enemy whispering in their ear and we really have to focus hard to get really try to understand where they're coming from and then you can start to seek and so when you find yourself in a difficult conversation this week step setback this listen don't react if it's not giving in.

This is choosing not to react and say what I do with this is everything I need to do here. I need look in the mirror and say that something needs to change any to fight against the enemy better walk toward you and towards truth.

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