Jesus on Marriage

Jeannie Greer friendship or companionship is the purpose of marriage not the only purpose if friendship is the purpose of marriage have massive implications for dating because of marriage is about friendship friendship ought to be the basis of data you want to be looking for someone who is your equal.

Which is why I say if you're not a Christian. What the Bible says you should never date or marry somebody is not a Christian pastor. I'm your host Molly that events pastor did he begin a brand-new teaching series called forever family about marriage affects the way that you use so much more of life. If you're not married. Topics like dating, conflict and even singleness are ultimately shaped by your view of marriage pastor JD shows us how the gospel shapes the essence and purpose of marriage teaches us why no matter what you've been called to whether marriage or singleness going to help to accomplish it. Grab your Bible and 10 in less joint castigating sex family, kids and other small trifling topics to say from the outset that this would be a great series for you to bring your 12 and die because there's is just some but I think everybody will find really relevant. There are three things in church that we have found people who don't typically come the church are often open to receiving an invitation for Christmas services Christmas Eve services, Easter services, with the second. The third would begin a series on marriage and family were dating.

So, state the obvious, okay. The obvious is that romance and marriage have great potential for good in your life really is one of God's greatest gifts to the flipside of that is because it has great potential for good. It also has great potential for harm. Think about it, as most people most of you if you were to recount your most painful memory, chances are it could have something to do with with some kind of heartbreaking and in in in romance or in family. If you have somebody to tell you about the greatest mistake that they made. It's almost always related to something something sexual when people come in and mop into my office and sit down and they say pastor above never told anybody just got tell you this almost always is almost always really related to sex and someways some never heard it said you think of Saxon romance like like a like a God like a pistol when my dad taught me how to use gone.

The first thing he taught me to do was respected as of the worst thing is somebody grabbed pistol and waving at or around with no idea what it could do.

My dad would tell me to never point that it's something that you don't intend to shoot for the same thing is true for for romance. If you don't respect it. You don't understand its power many could do you any could do other people. Great harm. This this Bible this Bible we open every single weekend.

This is the recounting of God's intentions. His design for sexuality is design for marriage is designed for romance explains what is what it's for and how it's supposed to work after I got married Danny Aiken, who is president over Southeastern seminary and the friend and in many ways, a mentor of mine. He told Veronica and I meet. We were sitting there having dinner with him and he said listener two things there two things that you need to understand to have a happy marriage is the first one is that God is the author of all of it in his word instruct you on the best way that you can set it up. He said if you want to have a happy marriage. If you want to have a fulfilling, romantic life. A happy family. You follow God's counsel as carefully as you can is the second thing you need to understand is that is that when it comes to marriage, men are a lot like dogs and women are a lot like cats. Veronica looked at him sort of quizzically news I got men like dogs you look at my life and he said how you make a dog happy three things you want to get all happy you feed it you praise it, and you play with.

He said you want if you want to make JD happy said that should be your guide. He said our women like cats say somebody make a cat happy that nobody really knows.

But whatever you did the first time I was unaware the second time just to be your assignment as you go through this. This series is can be more about Danny Aiken's first piece of counsel about what God's word says about marriage and romance and family and and less about the second but it's would be great. I think Matthew chapter 19 is where we are going to be work on this series forever family and the idea comes from an answer that Jesus gave to him. A controversial question that he was asked there.

Matthew 19 and the answer that Jesus gives he introduces a new outlook on marriage. At least I would say that it's good to be new for most of us new outlook on marriage that will reshape how we think about everything connected to marriage connected to do divorces can be the question that he talks about singleness sex conflict and many other things you might be sitting there and say well I'm not married and I don't think I'm going to be married anytime in the near future.

So what's gonna what's gonna have for me. Ironically, this series might be the most helpful for you because you see understanding God's purposes for marriage will help you understand how he fulfills those same purposes in your life in other ways when when you're not married Matthew 19 Jesus is hosting up a live version of his own asked me anything podcast and the Pharisees were three came up to him and they tested it as it is it lawful Jesus to divorce one's wife for any cause.

Jesus answered, he said, have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them both male and female he said now quoting from Genesis to the opening chapters of the Bible. He sent for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and that Sue in that marriage are going to become one flesh.

So they are no longer two but one flesh.

What God has therefore joined together.

No man should separate my before we get into Jesus's answer to the divorce question.

Let's just consider this. What is Jesus teaching us about marriage with this quotation with his application of it, because his thoughts about marriage or to shape his his answer to divorce and also to teach us how to think about a lot of other things are connected to marriage also usually teaching is number one showing us that the essence of marriage is a covenant that were cleave the Jesus sites there in Genesis 2 in verse from Genesis to verse five that were cleave in Hebrew literally means to make covenant, the essence of a marriage is covenant marriage in a technical sense is your public vowel of faithfulness. Without that value, not married, having intensely loving feelings or affections for somebody doesn't make you marry me for for meeting nobody seems to be more excited about you everyday than your dog when it comes to affection or loving feelings. Your dog has a feeling that all that is married to the dog that we think about it.

The marriage ceremony is less about the state of your feelings in the present and the marriage is more about your promise to love in the future you are covenant seems to be tender to be faithful to be kind and compassionate and affectionate in a patient from that point on, when I done wedding some. A lot of times the couple will ask if they can write their own balance. That's great and always say yes, but always asking if I can see their valves before they actually give them in the ceremony because a lot of times the bowels of a right end up being a lot about how much they love each other now all your awesome and you smell like rainbows and sunshine or whatever. But that's not really what a marriage covenant is about.

Those things are sweet yes for the covenant is not about your feelings in the present.

The covenant is about your promise for the future marriage is also not just an efficient system that God creates the to propagate the human species order to anchor society.

Rapid rapid rabbits and rats are greater rapid propagation of their species within will get married.

Marriage is a union Jesus says, in which God uses two lives in the one you see verse six what God has joined together right nobody should separate in a marriage covenant. Your lives are intertwined in such a way that everything about you becomes one your future families become one. Your future happiness and success is become one your bank accounts become one. Your emotional lies become one. All that culminates in sex were physically your bodies become one she got to have massive implications for how you think about divorce. Jesus says will get to that in a minute.

But it's also got massive implications for how we think about sex which really get you later in the series. You see, if God designed marriage is a total fusion of souls, and when you separate physical oneness sex from oneness in every other area that's going to tear you apart at a fundamental level, you will mixes zombie creepy is that it somebody without a soul, that the fact that it was to eat you. Of course, but but what will mixes zombie zombies. You gotta you get a working body without a soul in their sexual partner.

Marriage separates the body from all the other dimensions of the soul is my says but I really really love this person yeah I get that but you and I both know that without that covenant, you can walk away from it at any moment the creator's design for sex. From the beginning is that it was to be experienced in a relationship in which that physical oneness is coupled by oneness in every other area I can really get more to that later. Let me just say this right now.

Okay, a lot of people think that Christians are really negative when it comes to sex. Our messages don't do it.

Don't talk about that. I will explain this to you later.

It's actually exactly the opposite is that we recognize its power and its beauty, its potential for good potential for harm and how it's supposed to be a part of a complete fusion of our lives on that someone is at the essence of marriage is covenant and the second thing Jesus teaches us is that the purpose for marriage is friendship.

I hear me out here okay because I am a sinner a lot of purposes for marriage. But when you look in Genesis 2, the Jesus quoting here the immediate cause, but he points to is the reason the God created marriage was the need for companionship. You see, there verse five.

For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother in cleave to his wife. What reason is he talking about what you read verse before that the phrase before, that is, from the beginning God made them male and female God's creation of the female was in response to a problem and that problem. Genesis 218, was that it was. Not good for man to be alone, so God says I want to make him a companion about everything else that God had made. God said it's good for the man in his alone state that was the one thing that all of creation before the fall that God look at it and said not good God makes this statement before the fall. Before Adam says that ache of loneliness is the one egg that we have that does not arise from sin, Adam.

I explained you had a perfect, quiet time with God 24 hours a day and yet still, even with imperfect quiet time walking with God 24 hours a day. He still has an ache for human companionship mass because God created us in his image of God exist eternally is a Trinity in community with his equals. So God creates for Adam a companion is equal just from the opposite gender. The word that God uses to describe the woman that he made Ed and Sarah connect literally means alike but different somebody like Adam somebody his equal, but also different a different gender. In that way. Their marriage would be like the Trinity and that is same in the essence in their essence the same, but in the person and roles different. The woman was created to be his companion, his equal. His friend back several times in the Old Testament the marriage partners call just that in Hebrew, who which means a deep friend.

By the way, I think I'm given y'all some great nicknames for your boom right my my my my my my hot hello my little Ed Sarah connect up that's better than sugar butter I think so. You want to pressure you call your loop. All this is why city friendship or companionship is the purpose of marriage not the only purpose but the immediate cause that Jesus pointed to is the reason that God created it and you see if friendship is the purpose of marriage that's going to have massive implications for dating because of marriage is about friendship friendship ought to be the basis of data you want to be looking for someone who is your equal somebody who can be your friend somebody with whom you can share your deepest commitments, which is why I say if you're not a Christian. What the Bible says you should never date or marry somebody who's not a Christian, she for a marriage really to work for it to be like giving them an in and sustaining yet to open up and share the deepest parts of yourself. If it's good to be fulfilling.

If you're committed to Jesus and that's important you and your partner is not when you open up this part of your life to them and I can understand it right and you're going to feel violated because they don't share that thing that is deepest in your heart to think of life over to sit like rowing a boat if you got the one outside the front row in two different directions on that's what it's like to marry somebody who doesn't share your faith in Christ. If it's important to you.

You're constantly there, because it misunderstands you, your gonna when it comes to raising kids when it comes to doing stuff with money in your future when it comes to priorities in your life you will be poured into different directions, friendship is God's purpose for marriage that's can I have massive implications for dating this also can have implications for singleness because what Jesus is going to do is to point to a union between members of his body that stronger even the marriage, a family that is more significant even than our biological families are so number two, number two, we see the purpose friendship is marriage number three. Jesus explains in the pattern for marriage is the gospel better for marriage of the gospel. This might be the biggest idea of the mall something Jesus only alludes to.

Here in Ephesians 5, Paul, quote the same passages Jesus does explained in that first marriage. God is giving us a picture of his love for his people. Now, again, Jesus only alludes to it here, but this is a huge idea God designed marriage. Paul says in everything that goes with it to give us a taste of his love. Not only is that going to give you a pattern for how you can love your spouse, but ironically is to show you how you can be happy and fulfilled in a season when you're not married even when you really want to be how you can be content in a marriage that you're disappointed in how you can be happy in an unhappy marriage that CS Lewis I'm obviously you're like the idea to get married so very much for later in life and his and he was in his mid-50s.

He compared the blessing of marriage to a ray of sunshine. He said he said you know when the sun when you walk out in the morning, then a ray of sunshine hits your face and it warms your face as you look back up along the rates of the sun from which it emanates. He said the sun is the actual source. The rate is just that the manifestation of it. Marriage is like a array of the sunshine of God's beauty and his love, and if something in life obscures you from that rate. If the cloud comes between you and that Ray.

Well, you're still in the presence of the sun even though the rays not shining on your face the sun from which it emanates is still something that is a part of your life right before I got married first time that I went out with Veronica and that went into my class the next morning seminary class of one of my friends. You knew what had gone out with Veronica and I before the Lord, you know what you think. And so I went out of my new book a piece of paper that is redone every adjective that I can think the described are like 60 some different adjectives in a put on the sex and that's what I think about her and then just you know he was like the myopic you looking for maybe two seconds and handed it back and more me than than him opposite. So I give my notebook and by the grace of God succeed up to that notebook. Couple years later when we got we got engaged as one of us will have that no but one that found that list got it framed and then on her wedding day.

Give that to her and it had little statement under it by CS Lewis that basically was you represent something that can never be taken away from me. What I meant was, yes, there are situations where Veronica could be taken away from me know. Death could come to one of us in. She might not be a part of my life that you represent something the beauty that I experience to her. The love that the tenderness those are things that emanate from the sunshine of God's love that can never be taken away in some dark cloud were to obscure the raid, the son of God's love remains. By the way, I hope that you will start learning to look at all of the blessings of life that way. The book that the attention the tenderness I felt for my parents. That was a stand-in for God's love and so if your parents disappoint you. Well the raised all the sun remains in the day, the affirmation. Sometimes the community that I feel from friends. Those things are all manifestations of the goodness of God and experiencing them. I'm learning to experience goodness that comes from him. The sunshine that the sun itself is God's love and his presence.

One of the raised one of the manifestations is marriage and it's a great but CS Lewis said in the Bible because you don't get fixated on the raid because of the sun is what's important. So those are the three things that Jesus teaches us about marriage. He teaches us to submission few short statements. The essence of marriage is the covenant. The purpose for marriage is friendship and a pattern for marriage is the gospel.

Now let's look at how Jesus uses those concepts to spell out what he's gonna say is an obvious answer to the to the divorce question what is Jesus teaching a marriage mean for the horse verse six or six and therefore what God has joined together, no man on a separate notice that the other the other note neuritis. No, no, no, no fine print snow.

Recommended reading. In the sentence.

Marriage is a covenant instituted by God to demonstrate his love. If marriage really is a fusion of two souls into one sin.

Divorce should never be an option for seven they said in Lord Jesus.

Why then did Moses was speaking under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit.

Why did Moses then command one to give a certificate of divorce in the center away that point. If you're writing the score for the CU Q the dramatic music that was true.

Moses had said in Deuteronomy 24 one. When a man takes a wife and marries her if he finds any indecency in her, then, well, he could divorce her know I will wait a minute.

Jesus you're saying we shouldn't get divorce but Moses clearly says we could use the word command.

He commands us to got to Jesus, by the way, for the record you and say you should never get in the battle of wits with Jesus, particularly over the Bible but the Pharisees were not always as spicy as Doritos in the bag so they did. Jesus look back at them very calmly and says, okay, it's because of the hardness of your heart, Moses allowed you to divorce your wives even command you, he allowed it from the beginning, according to God's original design. It was not so rabbis in Jesus day taught a distinction.

Listen to this between a command in the wall and a concession from the law, the command they said express God's heart. The command reveals God's desires and his plans from the beginning. A concession was something that God allowed in society because of the fallenness of man because were broken people in order to keep peace in the society that are filled with with different ones of us at various levels of spiritual maturity disallowance for divorce. Jesus said it was never a command and you know that he tells the Pharisees. It was not a command express God's heart. It was a concession due to our fallen state and the Pharisees knew that many of the rabbis of the time for the difference in a commandment concession log that wasn't something new Jesus, but he was there trap. What did Moses mean by something indecent.

Deuteronomy 24 is and you get divorce and technically not be in sin if it was because of something indecent.

In Hebrew the phrase for something indecent is or what the bar it was an ambiguous phrase even for people who were fluent in Hebrew, so the Pharisees are trying to get Jesus on record saying something about marriage and divorce will make him really unpopular. So what is Jesus answer out as he responded verse nine I say to you, whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery, Jesus actually comes out stronger than the conservative position. Not only should you not get divorce. He says if you marry somebody else. After leaving your first spouse you are living in adultery with the second person because in God's eyes. At first covenant is still active because the marriage is not a contract where you agree to a set of conditions, so long as the other party satisfactorily fulfills theirs. Marriage is a covenant. He said were you leave and cleave you coveting you pledge complete unconditional sacrificial love that mirrors God's love for what God has joined together. He said nobody separate you missed part of this message or would like to be the transcript@jeanniegreer.com Jenny we have a resource to help us memorize 50 verses in the Bible this year, but I know it's and people are thinking Scripture memory seems like an activity for kids. So why is it so important for us as adults to keep this practice to you. Sadly, I think we emphasize it in the church mainly to our children. The Holy Spirit can only ignite what's in your heart. But in order for him to be able to ignite that you do so in there and so is not just for kids.

It's a lifelong discipline. A level Psalm 119 says, how can a young man cleanses ways how can you walk with God helping you. You live abundantly. It's by knowing the word of God, but taking heed according to your word. I know a lot of people who ask, how can I know the will of God.

The will of God is directly tied to your knowledge of the word of God. If you say you want to know the will of God and are not devoting yourself to the word of God then you're leaving yourself down the wrong path because that your ability to know is will is directly proportionate to how much you study his word when Jesus confronted Satan. We all know that he used Scripture. We don't think about is the fact that Jesus got up one Scripture. So if even the son of God to do battle with Satan needed to quote Scripture.

How foolish is it for you immediate for us to engage Satan in our lives and our families.

For the sake of our kids and not know the Scripture that Jesus was so familiar with it. Jesus needed Scripture to file Satan. How much more how much more the week that's one of the reasons we've given your giving out this this month. This pack of versus 50 verses that will will help you memorize God's Word hope that you can reach out us get one of these go to JD where.com allows you to be a part of her ministry. Here is a way of saying thank you for that. Would love to get you these gifts see see the word of God to get shape, etc. are a magnet perfect for hanging on your fridge filing cabinet.

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