Breaking Through Life's Biggest Barriers - How to Overcome Loneliness and Isolation, Part 1

When you do when you're consumed with loneliness. Where do you go when the feelings of isolation threatened to choke off your desire to live. Have you been there you wish there was a way you can overcome these lonely feelings before they overcome you, there's good news.

Welcome to this Wednesday. Addition of Living on the Edge with children living over the edges of international discipleship ministry training. The Bible teaching of shipping today.

Trip launches a new series called breaking through life's barriers over the next couple of weeks will explore the issues and behaviors that tend to trip us up from the perspective of how to overcome after the teaching trips always with us and to bring some more personal thoughts application message sure to stay with us for that. Now with his message how to overcome loneliness and isolation. Here is our teacher Chip Ingram, loneliness, isolation, member when you were four or five years old. It happened almost at least once you looked up and your mom is gone. You were in the mall or the grocery store and that panic that feeling that came over you. That's loneliness member when you're 89 maybe 10 and you went to a new school.

You walked in, and every head in that place turned toward you and you felt like an outsider member. The first gym class you ever went to in junior high terrible feeling of they really can make us take showers. Remember when you hit those preteens for summer teams for others and they can call it puppy love.

It wasn't to you in your heart really gotten into a person of the opposite sex and it was this overwhelming elation and you can remember what it was like when you got dumped how lonely, how curtains are hurt like you've never known for many is still no one for some of us it's a memory of being single and yearning, coming home to an empty apartment and yearning for a life mate yearning to eat dinner with someone but there's no one there and you been asking God, but so far he hasn't provided that person. One author wrote.

It's the most desolate word in all human language.

It's capable of hurling that heaviest awaits the heart can endure. It plays no favorites yields no mercy refuses all bargaining crowns only make it worse activity simply drives it deeper. Tears fall from our eyes as groans fall from our lips, but loneliness that uninvited guest of the soul arrives at dusk and stays for dinner.

When's the last time you felt like was it this week.

What era of your life brings back memories of the deepest sense of isolation and loneliness.

And as you think you're just in the quiet of this moment where and when you feel the pangs of feeling like you don't belong like no one cares like you not really connected right now.

One final question why, why do you think breaking down the barrier of loneliness and isolation is so critical to have a life that's full a life of roaming white invite you to join with me in and we want to address this together how to overcome loneliness and isolation is universal before before we go too far. We better define what were talking about because until loneliness is understood and overwhelm some of us think that something is wrong with us, but there's this secret problem we have and no one really has it like we have. There's three concepts when you study the idea loneliness that are critical to understand before we find out what God's answer is the first is that loneliness is more than being alone you look up the word in Webster's as I did. If you study and look at the Hebrew words translated for loneliness. If you look at the word loneliness in the New Testament. What you find is that there's a couple different ideas. One is an alumnus or a private nest. Jesus went to be alone in a positive context. They were alone. No problem, but the kind of loneliness were talking about is more than being alone. Webster describe it is without involving others, separate feelings of lonesomeness, desolate yearning for companionship on frequented to be separated to be disconnected. You can be lonely and thinking of this group and praying about what to share you the loneliest feeling I've ever had in this church. I did know hardly anyone and there were near as many people then there were hundreds of people.

This picnic they were laughing and throwing Frisbees and having fun in having a great time and on the past and I walked around all these faces that I didn't know I felt like I was in a glass box like Plexiglas walking around and I didn't belong and I didn't and I didn't know anyone and people kinda came up and gave a sort of smiles of high and I just had this overwhelming feeling like this 1 to 1 of their I couldn't and I call and I did little superficial type stuff, but I didn't know anybody. I didn't connect with anyone. I was in a huge crowd where I was supposed to belong, but I didn't.

I member. I remember coming home from the picnic and being as depressed as I've been since I've been here and you know the fact of the matter is there's people in this room right now. You had that experience when you come to church. You know you're a believer but you feel like you're walking in a little glass box and you get a smile here in a pleasantry here not connected, you will feel like someone really cares. You don't feel like you really belong you if something happened to you, someone wouldn't believe emotionally is being alone is a lot more than just not having people around. It's not being relationally connected in a meaningful way where you might say well you know I don't have that problem. Henry clouded his book healings that change says there's 8 to 10 symptoms of loneliness that people don't identify with loneliness, but when we don't feel connected. We covered up. He gave a few examples he said, often depression, feelings of meaninglessness, feelings of badness or guilt. A sense of distorted thinking. No one wants to be around me addictions fantasy excessive caretaking some the loneliest people take care of everyone you know why I can't stand the fact that no one's really reaching into their life and some of us have such distorted thinking. We don't think anybody wants to and we are connected people we feel bad because were we assume the reason were not connected as people must must be something bad about us. If you feel pangs of loneliness. There's nothing wrong with you is nothing wrong with you means you human means you have legitimate needs means God really wants to care about you. Loneliness is more than being alone and loneliness wears many masks we covered up in a lot of different ways. Some people make a friend out of the bottle. Some people make a friend out of a pretend fantasy person.

Some people make out a friend out of ESPN romance novel loneliness wears many masks. Third thing you need understand about loneliness. It's not a unique malady, but is a universal reality is not something that only rich people have a problem with poor people or outgoing people or shy people or very intellectual people or average people.

In fact, my favorite quote my research, Albert Einstein what Albert Einstein said. He said it is a strange phenomenon to be so universally known and yet to be so long see. We think people have it together because they're famous or wealthy or well-known or popular or have an outgoing personality or seem to have friends. Loneliness is a part of what I struggle with, you struggle with every person, every baby every old person.

Every middle-age person, every teenager, every black person every white person every Asian person every Hispanic person person on the earth struggles with this week. The sense that they don't matter that they're isolated and that there alone. In fact, this is the only problem I can find in Scripture that God alone has chosen not to solve by himself think that Genesis chapter 1 before sin entered into mankind before there was a problem. Perfect environment. Here's Adam. It never rains plenty of food. He's never born. He can talk to God whenever he wants, but did you notice there's a problem that God can't solve. Not that he could if he didn't want to but he made you and he made me to have this need to be connected meaningfully with other people and so remember what he said when he saw it is not good for man to be alone. See loneliness isn't bad. It's not a permanent state but it lets you know it lets me know that life was meant for community that life was meant for relationships that life was meant for us to be together and not in some superficial go through the motions, but to be together in such a way that things come out of your heart into the lives of others and things come out of their heart into yours.

In such a way that you matter and they matter and got to do a lot of things for you and your life you ministered directly directly give grace uses word gives a spirit, but there are some ways where the only way you will experience God's love is not directly, it will be indirectly it'll be through the touch of a person to the words of a friend through the prayers of the group.

The question is if we all have this need. If you can be lonely in a crowd if it wears many masking we all struggle with it. How in the world do we ever overcome loneliness and isolation and I'm excited to tell you that God has a game plan to give you four reasons why you don't have to be lonely. First, you don't have to be lonely because God cares about your loneliness I mentioned in passing. Genesis 218 the Lord God said it is not good for the man to be alone I will make him a helper suitable for him that were helper means corresponding partner network helper is actually used in the Psalms of God uses this word for himself means one who will complete one who provide companionship. Someone who make a team. Someone who creates a place where you belong. God knows joint depots feelings of loneliness and he cares he understands what you think when you lay awake at night with your hands in your head. She knows what it's like when you take a walk on the beach and you feel like no one really understands.

She knows what is like to be a single mom or a single dad had to drop your kids often visitation get back in the car and feel this ache inside. He knows what is like to be a teenager or young person for a single person with this craving desire to be connected and you're praying and seems like nothing's he cares about your loneliness and can I suggest he wants to solve perfectly in this life. Never. Not a perfect world, but he wants to move in. He cares and is all-knowing is all-powerful and if he cares and he can do something about second reason that you don't have to be lonely.

I don't have to be lonely is Jesus understand your loneliness, Mark 15 verse 34 says, and at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice is on the cross very in the Gospels, enemas, life Eloi Eli Lamas about Donny, which means my God, my God, why have you forsaken me to some major theology going on here.

If you ever wondered why Jesus said that when explained before the foundations of the earth. God created you as a relational being before the foundations of the earth. He knew that sin would enter the world and cause a division of breakdown in relationship between God and man before the foundations of the earth, the Godhead, the tri-unity God the father, God the son God the Holy Spirit Council meeting and they decided that God the son would come and take on human flesh and be fully God and fully man can live a perfect life on the earth, so you would understand so I would understand what God's love is like what his holiness is like how he feels and how he thinks and how much you matter and then at the end of his life he would be the ultimate payment totally sin free.

He would hang on a cross and he would absorb the just wrath of God and the full penalty of your sand and my sin as our substitute are sin offering, you might jot down second Corinthians 521 explains that as he hung on the cross and God the father willfully allowed his son to be the sacrifice who did nothing to deserve it took on your send my send the penalty and the guilt of it and God poured out his wrath in place that sin is a payment on Christ when sin came upon the son. The father turned his head and turned away, and the relationship was broken between a holy God.

And in that instantaneous moment when the sun took on sin and that's why Jesus prayed like God, my God, we don't understand the pain there.

We can't fathom the pain you think human lonely you think you've been abandoned. You think you meant letdown. Jesus understands he was abandoned righteously so by the father where the 12 disciples, they abandon him. He came to is on the Jews and what they received him not. They abandon him. Jesus understands what it's like to be. Hebrews 415 says that we don't have a high priest can't sympathize with our weaknesses, but he like us has been tempted in every way, yet without sin. He understands what is like to be frustrated in marriage be lonely because he was married Noah because he was fully human and knows that he understands what like what is like to be unfulfilled to feel like on the outside looking in to understand everything that you feel in the realm of loneliness. God not only cares, but Jesus completely understands because he understands there's 1/3 reason we don't have to be lonely.

The third reason is Jesus invites you into a relationship with him.

This is a great passage. This passage is so different than all about what I learn of God.

Growing up Jesus in Matthew 1128 through 30 says listen to this, arms open, come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest doesn't loneliness make you feel that way sometimes I just feel the way down. Is it amazing that when you feel connected with people she feel like you can charge you will want no matter what.

When you feel isolated and lonely. I know that you have no motivation to make, so it's Jesus say, if you weary and burdened, like the way the world on you come to me. I'll give you rest. The notice the offer. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me so you got a big load to pull in life. Would you like me to have a yoke and allow you to be hooked here and need to be hooked here and would you like to go through life with me, since I know all things since I have unlimited resources, since I love you unconditionally.

Since I want to care about you and fulfill the deepest desires that I placed in your heart just come take my yoke and its processes and learn from me, why do we learn from him. Notice the two adjectives I am gentle.

The word means power and control power under control and humble of heart. That word means vulnerable, approachable nonjudgment, and you will find rest for your souls everything. Maybe it's time to quit hustling and bustling and trying to impress people look this way get this way and get this.

Again, this should learn that have this and do this and hope your kids have this.

Have you ever just wondered what it be like to have rest for your soul to be clean to be forgiven and have a God of the universe, put his arm around you and say I love you just how your and in ways that you can take a little at a time, will teach you and love you and help you become all that I designed you to be. Notice how it ends.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. See a lot of us grew up with a view of God and God's got his arms crossed and got his finger out, you better get their laterals Akita not even really matter to this matter today that an initiative that our view of some distorted the God of the Bible has arms open, do you have to surrender sure to let up on your own agenda.

Sure.

But let me ask you how you doing running your life filled with anxiety struggling relationships no matter how much you get a how much I get it never satisfies us wouldn't be wise to come in on how this works. But even as I'm talking a little light goes on inside your heart Holy Spirit is moving all throughout this lights on. Some of you because he brought you here just for today because he wants to have a connection relationship sees the offer of relationship and you seem to you. I'm standing at the door of your life. I don't care where you been. I don't care what you've done. I don't care who you've heard. I don't care the sin that so greetings to your heart and feel so guilty I come. And when I died on the cross I paid for. Come to me if you don't have a relationship with Christ, if you're not 100% sure but if you died because it happened all the sometimes somewhere Jesus is inviting you.

I'd like to solve your loneliness problem. I like to forgive you the moment you pray and say Lord Jesus come into my life. I believe when you died on the cross was for me and my sins are forgiven. The moment you pray and receive him as your Savior. The Holy Spirit will come into your life to pick up dwelling place. The Bible says you be sealed in the spirit you be adopted as one of his sons or daughters you have power over sin, you still struggle you have freedom from the penalty of sin, you have new relationships you will move into a whole new arena will be easy. Of course, live a holy, pure life in a fallen world with the flesh and the enemy.

Of course it will be easy but is your life easy now. My, but you can go through it with someone look at first John what you see this relationship between being in relationship with God and therefore in relationship with other believers. By the way, that's the theme of the book of first John the apostle writes that which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, speaking of Christ which we have looked at and our hands have touched these things is real. This we proclaim concerning the word of life. The life appeared Jesus we have seen it and testify at to it and we proclaim to you the eternal life which was with the father, and is paired us the gospel great get the next two verses we proclaim to you that we have seen, and we have heard. Notice the purpose clause so that you also may have fellowship with us. I was expecting to say what so you can have fellowship with so you proclaimed it when we share the gospel with so people can have fellowship with us.

Our fellowship is with the father and with his son Christ Jesus.

We write this to make our joy complete to get once you're related to God.

You are now organically related to other believers all over the world and have you pick this up yet. Have you figured this out about life that joy is not a target or thing that you can try to achieve with that joy is a byproduct of relationships.

You know you you want to write that down and if you learn that it'll transform how you live life to there's a lot of people that think success will bring them joy and in a successful once empty, they think getting something burning something achieving something being something dressing a certain way. Having a certain house driving a certain car that they think will bring them joy. What happens like the old cat chases him you bite into it, only to find out it certainly wasn't what you expected. See joy as a byproduct of relationships with one another before we go any farther, prayed with me today.

I want you to do a couple things right now. If you're driving obviously do this when you get home.

But first tell the best Christian you know that I just prayed to receive Christ as my Savior today and then second what you go to the internet@livingontheedge.org that's one long word LivingontheEdge.org that's our website to find a wealth of information were to give you the beginning steps of how to grow in your relationship with Christ, if you don't have Internet access. You can call 1-888-333-6003. And finally, please let me know if you made that decision today. It is an amazing encouragement to all of us here Living on the Edge to hear your story. You can email it to us or even gives call on the phone at 1-888-333-6003 and tell us what's going on your life. We want to hear how God is working in you if you prayed along with Chip. I hope you'll take a few minutes and call us at 1-888-333-6003. We'd love to talk with you get a free resource revered and specifically designed to help you get started out right on your new journey of faith. Another option is to go to our website LivingontheEdge.org just click the new believers button to find that same resource while you're there, click share your story.

We really do want to hear how God is working in your life again for the new believers button or to share your story find it all on our homepage@livingontheedge.org as we close today's program. I would ask you to pray for those people prayed to receive Christ today, and for those people who made him the Lord of their life.

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I hope you'll go to LivingontheEdge.org and download it may be shirt with a friend. Don't forget to include a note about how it made a difference in your life will tomorrow. Chip will continue our series breaking through life's biggest barriers should make plans to join us for chipper the entire team. This is the same. Thanks for listening. this Edition of Living on the Edge