God's Boundaries for Abundant Living - A Word to Families in an Age of Chaos, Part 2

Honor your father and mother what comes to your mind when you hear those words and by the way, are there times when you can't. What if you don't have a good dad or a good mom what they ask you to do things that wreck your marriage. How do you honor your folks when it seems absolutely impossible. That's what we explore today. Thanks for joining us for this Wednesday vision of living on the chip serves as our Bible teacher on this daily international discipleship program and were in the middle of a series called God's boundaries for abundant living chips taking a fresh look at the 10 Commandments tackles a really tough one. Especially if you had a difficult childhood. The question is how do you obey God and honor your parents. Your parents don't act honorably. So let's get going Georgia for part two of this message from Exodus chapter 22nd aspect is then not when their child but as a young person I honor my parents by respecting and cooperating with them. This is for Kannada middle to late teens, early adulthood, but you're still living in their home you're still eaten their food, you're still sleeping in their bed they still buy you a pretty good portion of your close the car insurance you not taking care of another words you are still dependent you're mature, there's a natural tension and there is a breaking away and you're making more and more of your own decisions in your choosing your friends and you been taught well. When you're making good progress and now respecting and cooperating with your parents is what it looks like to honor them. Notice Proverbs 2322 it says listen to your father who gave you life and do not despise your mother when she is old.

I would add don't despise her anytime, but especially when she's old. He goes on to say in Proverbs 2020 if you curse your parents, your life will and like a lamp that goes out in the dark. You need to teach and if you are a middle teenager someone still living at home. You need to respect your parents.

You know what you can disagree. Are you ready for this. Your parents don't have to be right that it will happen on rare occasions you're sitting here in your student, your listing my voice and you know what, there are certain times where yeah they don't get it. And they say this is the way it is in your thinking. That is totally wrong. You know what God's will. If you is respect your parents cooperate with them. God is sovereign. Your parents get over buildup back one day and realize how smart you were and how much you know. And they should have done it your way. But you know God's get a hold you responsible to respect and cooperate with your folks and you know what wise parents understand there's real tension at the picture I have the word picture that help me so much of my kids is during this time.

Those those middle teens and on I view my kids like a kite and what they really need to do they need to learn how to fly and fly on their own and what you do is use keep. Let not string use keep. Let not string, as long as you're doing fine. Keep letting out string and the string is is that you have responsibility over here and you have authority over here and they get to make more and more choices the more more responsible. They are when they make really bad choices the response it in the responsibility, authority. You just keep them together and you know what how how how late they stay out when they can use the car how much money gets allotted to hear there it is all based on the more responsible. They are more and more and more you let loose at one of our kids right now I'm just she's very very mature. She's doing things. It 17 that none of her brothers did.

She's more responsible than they were.

They say girls you know mature faster and part of that I'm sure is true physically, but with her.

It was it's true spiritually. So one of the things I wanted her to learn is I'm thinking you know a year. So from now she's in have to make all the decisions and so Teresa and I sat down we figured out how much money in general do we spend on everything for our daughter and I may not do some sort of allowance but close makeup camps everything and we we decided that we would take that X amount of money and just give it to her each month and she has her own account she makes her own decisions she saves money.

She is learning all the things like you know she just went to a camp and cheap she paid half of it was she had to figure out last December. How much money she's gonna say have money for camp and when she goes to store. It's not like came on a dead look at that blouse Can I have that one could I have when she's not like that but but it's like well you know it cost X amount of dollars you have X amount of money make a good decision.

See what you want to do. The goal is not that you restrict your kids and create some artificial bubble, whether it's in a school or your home or some environment what your goal is how do I help my kids learn to make great decisions had a lot help my kids learn to be loving and other centered and how do I help them learn to be responsible and and and and said that that's and I love God, you don't want to become independent. You want to transfer their dependents from you to God, and if you're a student you're living in your parent's home for the responsibility from God's perspective, honor your parents respect them cooperate you if you ever thought about what we like. When Jesus was a teenager. You think he knew more than his folks.

I think so yeah I don't think he ever had a bad day, but I have a passage it tells me that from age 12 on, but after that little event member where mom and dad did know where he was and he was learning from the rabbis and teaching some of the rabbis I get a passage it says from that age on. He lived in subjection to his parents and when he modeled for every teen post teen and early adult is that you know something. This can be dialogue godly times around the table were this healthy exchange really real disagreements but at the end of the day you say, you know, mom, dad, I just want you know I totally disagree. I don't think it's a very good decision. I think I should be able to do that.

I think it indicates maybe you don't trust me like you need to. But, boom boom above but you know at the end of the data table at mom that I'm going honor you and I think got a reward my life for and by the way, when you start creating that kind of atmosphere the way you produce great kids as you feed him responsibility you let them do things early early and earlier on as they demonstrate themselves responsible that they look at you like you let me do that and I never forget I was actually lucky from Indiana here I was between my senior and junior year and it was a basketball tournament my parents. I had a Volkswagen van and four of my buddies after the state tournament and we drove to in Annapolis to meet some guy I met a tournament to play hoops outside and I'm not even a senior and I asked my mom to you. Let me go yeah. In fact, my dad walks over, pulled out his wallet says here's a credit card you probably a bit low on gas measures four guys, 17 who meet a bunch of guys of the state tournament were in a drive for a couple three days in Annapolis.

There's a lot of not good things happen right, and I remember thinking my parents are nuts. Yeah, I would never let me do this. I just asked, thinking they probably won't.

You know, and I'll never forget my mom was with my dad. She leaned over she goes chip. We know that you would never do anything to disappoint. I made the thought of doing anything. The thought of doing anything that would bring shame on them or disgrace never entered my mind. But it wasn't because they figured out a zillion ways to restrict me it's because there was open dialogue and they demonstrated that much trust in me. When you are a small child. You obey God, you honor your parents by obeying them in your teen and young adult years you honor them by respecting and cooperating with them. And third, as an adult I honor my parents by affirmation and provision. Those are two key words affirmation and provision an essay will how do you affirm your parents.

I'm to say the number one way you affirm your parents is by your life by your character by your godliness.

Proverbs 2324 says the father of a righteous man has great joy. He who has a wise son delights in him. You're 30 years old 40 years old 50 years old, your parents are still living 60 years old and your parents are still living. The greatest gift is not a phone call is wonderful. That is the greatest gift is not a birthday card is wonderful as that is the greatest gift is not binding little trip and sending them somewhere. The greatest gift as an adult, a grown adult you ever give your kids is becoming the kind of man or the kind of woman that is pleasing to God. It is Christlike that your parents can look and say, while while, oh Lord, who I to get to be the mom or the dad of that godly man or that godly woman and all.

Oh Lord, what an amazing thing to see this godly son or godly daughter raising my grandchildren and the fear of the Lord powerful how you honor, you affirm them by your life. Second, it says do not withhold good from those who deserve it. When is in your power to do it. That's Proverbs 327. I want to suggest that you not only honor them by your life but you honor them by your actions. Affirm them by your actions and let me just give you a little, salad bar of suggestions and the one that hits home. You're probably doing a number of these, but one is I would say communication especially when we get spread out. Communicate with your folks. Whether that's a call whether that's a letter and I know there's times where the relationships get really funky and there's some generational issues. I've watched at least with my parents and in my my wife's parents is when there's conflict. They don't like conflict at all in, speaking the truth in love. You want to get that out on the table and bring resolution. They don't do that when there's conflict. They just withdraw for like three or four months, or at least they use to and and then you get a phone call like six months later like nothing happened.

I you doing every thing okay and you're gone. Well, what about that big argument at Thanksgiving and you know you did this in all this stuff and don't we need to get this on the table, speak the truth in love, and and you know it's just wild and so there's times where you feel like the last thing I want to do is give them a call or jot them a note but I think one of the ways we affirm our parents is that as far as it depends on us an appropriate way at appropriate times of times you can't where you communicate with calls and letters and visits, and I think his thoughtfulness did just being thoughtful.

You know what wheat we don't know I'm growing old is something that happens other people until it you and I think just being thoughtful about the dynamics of what it's like to grow old what it's like to be alone what it's like to not be in on the action what it's like to experience some level I think of us as you grow older. All of us are to have some level of regrets what it's like to deal with internal issues and just just being thoughtful including them when possible and special events. You know if you can arrange your birthday with you. One of the grandkids are working things out where you know just by shifting it a few days this way or that way you're celebrating a vacation on this direction where you can include them. You know when that works.

I think that communicates you affirm them by your action in one of the ways I found you affirm them. It is just by making requests and ask what they think I meant doesn't have to take their counsel, but some of us you know you had the early knocking of the heads and so you had that early in the knocking the heads were you learned not to listen to them and then you go to the next 30 years acting like they don't have any wise counsel to give you yeah it's an amazing thing at one of the things I've cherished and I got two adult sons that I guess there's 30 now and mate. One of the great when they have emotional issues and issues of the heart.

I hear Teresa talking on the phone for long hours.

I just think now I know why those guys when they score touchdowns would say hi mom and help waiting for some guy score a touchdown go.

Thanks dad. You threw the ball with me.

98,000 toys hi Monica, is there some about mom you know when they have a big decision to make or a couple of them are involved in full-time ministry that the third was going into it now work or when I have a truth in love, issue or wisdom issue. I can tell you, even if they don't take it. It makes me feel so affirm when they say that I could issue currently run this by and I listen and you know if there's a passage or something or an experience I can say what you know, let God lead you, but you know from where I've been these last years. Here's, here's my take on the situation's powerful how you know something you can be in a wheelchair and give counsel you can feel like your life doesn't have a lot of value and say dad, mom, would you would you pray I really need your prayers on this one. What one of the grandkids is going through this, which would mean would you pray and then ask him to pray and then tell them what happened to you. We affirm our adult parents by affirmation and then also by provision. This is probably the most radical part of this entire lesson. Let me read first Timothy 54 in first Timothy 58 without any interruption is what I want you to see is that when you become an adult. A nonnegotiable requirement of honoring your parents is to financially provide for their welfare in their latter years. This was written. This command was given before Social Security okay and you praise God for any government programs or praise God for life insurance or praise God for different things, a people of done to care for themselves, but you need to hear that the biblical model of who is responsible in this thing called the cycle of life. You know this is a fact. Sometimes we lose sight of.

If it wasn't for your mom and dad, you would be here ponder that one deeply. I made bad mom and dad hard mom and dad difficult mom and dad, abusive mom and dad difficult childhood. All that being said if it wasn't for that mom and that dad I've got on good authority, I'm good. I just got a limbs that you would be and when you came into the world. You can do anything. Could you nothing. If your mom and dad what you were feeble you were completely dependent.

You were tiny you couldn't feed yourself. You couldn't close yourself all you did is make messes and they joyfully on most parts not all that they joyfully embrace you and your messes and did everything for you. God's wisdom and God's Word and God's plan is then there will come a day when that cycle will go full circle and you will have a mom or you will have a dad that will be completely dependent on you and you know what they might need a diaper and you might need to feed them and you will have to figure out what that looks like it is in a million different ways and whether that's moving in or moving in isn't good or assisted-living or daily visits or weekly visits or monthly visits. Or, you know what you've gotta figure out there's a whole lot issues to figure out what that looks like in your particular situation but listen to this passage because the Bible is very clear that were morally responsible to do that and that's what it means to honor our folks. It says that if a widow has children or grandchildren.

You talk about who receive financial funds from the church is only so much money the church to go around and apostle Paul is speaking to Timothy and says I Timothy you asked me a couple questions you young pastor. Let me give you the lowdown.

This is God's perspective on who should get money and who shouldn't which widows so he says if a widow has children or grandchildren. These should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family. The acid test of putting your religious and the practice is in a bot isn't, you know, your quiet time is not going to church is not ministry involvement. What great things he says. First, they should put the religion into practice by caring for their own family and so re-paying their parents and grandparents for this is pleasing to God.

Skip down to verse eight.

If anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for his immediate family. He's denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever is that strong or what you have to be wise and discerning so it looks like but we are morally responsible as believers to care for aging parents. That's what it looks like to honor our grandparents. We affirm them and we financially provide form I put on the bottom of your notes. Matthew a, 15, 1 to 9.

I don't want to develop it but this is one of those you grab a cup of coffee and read it through but you need one little tiny piece of information, because it'll really make a lot of sense. Jesus is being attacked and they're saying you are destroying the traditions you are not obeying God you are, this radical teacher what are you doing in the first couple verses in Matthew 15 and Jesus turns the tables quickly so wait a second. You are the ones that are destroying the truth of God based on the traditions of men, and then he quotes he quotes the fifth command. It says the Scripture says honor your father and mother that it he lays it all out. He says that you have said you that you have taken that which rightfully belongs to supporting your parents and what they would do is that it was called core bond. You have called it core bond and what they would do is like a little trust fund and they would say this is designated for God and of the trust fund designated for God, but they wouldn't actually give it into the temple, they would say this money is set aside for God, they would take the money that was supposed to go to their folks so they would have to support help their folks and they said all this, make it spiritual will call this core bond and it is designated for God someday some way and then they wait till their parents die so they could use the money on themselves and he says you have taken the traditions of men and nullified the truth of Scripture. Jesus takes this actual command about supporting parents and goes right to the jugular with. I think as people are living longer and longer and longer. This is going to be one of the real big issues to the body of Christ. What does it look like to lovingly support and provide for and some of us thought you know if we could ever get our kids through college. If we ever get close to paying off our house. I got news for you. We may get there made me need to start saving and planning for the whole next big picture, which may be supporting our parents and it also has applications to for as we get older thinking you know how can I help be a part of this process where I don't kill my kids because there morally responsible. How can I set my life up in such a way that I'm not too much of a burden on the things my dad did not. I still remember I thought it was crazy. He took of pretty expensive assisted care policy out and I thought to myself, I mean it was it was pretty expensive.

Couldn't take it up to 70 and at 70. My dad's plain softball with 30-year-old playing first base back about 650.

Go figure that that high furnace I get honestly by 75 my dad spinning good portions time in a wheelchair and he contracts a rare disease called Shea draggers where the autonomic system starts with your feet and then little by little it goes up all through your body until nothing works, and now his legs don't work and you know something's insurance policy pays hundred dollars every single day for a in-house healthcare professional and it was his wisdom and discernment to do that but took tons of pressure off me and my sisters for some of us need to think about what the kids need to do and so must need to think about what we might need to do. Let's wrap up because there some I promised who is this tasteful, what is this talk about its reality in your heart of hearts and your emotions are.

I don't want to honor okay menu knocking to show what you not to give a facial expression. This room but down deep in your got you think I don't want to honor my mom and dad okay I don't. In fact, I don't want to not, I don't even like him okay in fact I have anger fantasies for my mom and dad but you know this sounds nice cute little Bible type stuff for you.

You didn't grow up in my home. You are an abuse like my sister and I was you know what it was like when he came home drunk and beat mom up I'll take what I can't honor my mom and my dad and I would say that the Scriptures clearly were to respect what's right in the sight of all men to be at peace with them.

As far as it depends on us and I think there are four times when you can't honor your parents. I've given you the passages that I want to highlight him and let you dig them out for yourself the first time is the priority of salvation. Mark 10 2023 to 31. My wife recently had the opportunity to lead a young Jewish girl Christ and a one of her big issues was do I tell my dad or not and what the enemy and she had to go through this issue of am I gonna align with God. What my dad says you know you're out of this house.

Forget it and she had to come to the point where rather than honor her father's wishes she had to say. I'm going to receive the salvation of your shoe, she is my Savior and my Messiah and put my faith in him regardless of what my father thinks, and there are times where we cannot honor our parents or their wishes when it comes to choosing between them and their desires and putting your faith in Christ. Second is the priority of service. Luke 959 62.

He says you can.

There's times where were called to serve God and who dilute you leave mother, brothers, sisters, homes, families, right when we took off for seminary. Teresa's dad would not speak to us for about four or five months. He did not even he did not show up to say goodbye. He was so close to my older boys and he was so angry it was just hurt and he did not expressly get so ticked off. It was, you know you he couldn't see were preparing for ministry was a call of God. All he could see was I'm losing my grandkids and I and I mean just what you know what, we had a choice of either honoring her father or honoring God.

There's times were God will call you and to service. Were you honor God and not your parents.

The third is Ephesians 531 to 33, the priority of marriage. There are some parents some in-laws and they figure out ways. Some subtle, some not-so-subtle to put a wedge between you and your wife or you and your husband at one point in time and you know this isn't pretty, to share, but you know my mom is is gone now and my dad is the 81 years old in a wheelchair and I don't think you mind me sharing this, but out of their great love for me. They put a wedge in our marriage my eye we would get occasional calls a person to person call my wife would answer the phone at person-to-person call that would say hello. This is for Chip Ingram, who is this is mother's father and my wife answered the phone that can you imagine what it be like to pick up the phone and have someone's parents call and call person-to-person is that like a not-so-subtle. We want to talk to you.

You don't matter and then I had to have one of those big sitdown times with my folks and basically and they did it this way.

In this way. In this way.

In this way and I had one of those you to come to Jesus meetings and I said you know what, if you want to you if you want to pick me against my wife hear me, you lose. Okay, if you want a relationship with me, it's me. My wife and our family. If you want with me alone. You lose it all, the priority of my life before God is that woman. Don't ever treated that way again on another occasion her dad came in and every time he would come in, he would.

He was just like an expert at, like how to ruin her world. It took her three months to recover after every visit this washers this washer on this.

How come no one fix this. Look at these knives. These Nizoral you and I just go around the house for three or four days and just everything that was wrong and so you know you live through eat a few meals then you can you know it was like when in-laws are there sometimes. Then you know you sit up in bed talking your wife cries and you get them thinking and this is insane.

So Fred and I have we. We had a come to Jesus meeting at Kmart and we wish you a Kmart and you know he's his great-grandfather and buys you know enough enough candy to kill 17 kids on any two days and it's his way of loving and I let it go. Kids brush her teeth needed kids brush her teeth as a way pulling from Kmart were sitting outside and I said you know Fred I said you know we've had our differences and I know you really love your daughter and II know you care about the kids, but we need talk about some I said when you come you pick apart every single thing in my house and everything thing about my wife and I mean is destroying her in Rotorua. Well, you know, it is not all be short message I said Fred you know what it ain't your job to figure out how not how sharper knives need to be and what losses work or don't work okay Fred hear me. I love you man and your daughter loves you, but working to go in that house.

Okay.

And when we go in that house. If you continue to criticize my wife. You can leave and your only to come back until you can figure out how to have good stuff come out of your mouth toward your daughter instead.

Bad stuff okay now it's your choice.

You do whatever you want.

I love you she loves you. The kids love you but I'm not gonna let you destroy my wife and destroy my family very quiet. Fred walked in. It was like a button was pushed night and day. I never heard criticize my wife next in 15 years and see what I want to say is there's a time you don't honor them. There's a priority as salvation service in marriage and then finally, this last one is the priority of what I call wisdom. If you have your Bible flip it open. It's important passage in Proverbs chapter 9 verse seven it says whoever cracks a mocker invites insult whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse. Do not rebuke a mocker or he'll hate you rebuke a wise man into love you instruct the wise man.

He'll be still wiser teach a righteous man and will add to his learning that first-line whoever cracks a mocker invites insult whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse in in Proverbs. There's four characters. The simpleton empty headed, has no knowledge needs to get it. There's a fool who's against God. There is the mocker who opposes God and all that God is and there's the wise person who responds to truth puts into practice. As you read all to the book of Proverbs. Those of the four characters in it says when there is a mocker when there's someone who's hostile when there is an alcoholic and drug addict when you are in your situation and you say, dad, you can't swear and and and drink in front of my kids like it are you trying to tell me I might kids at my house.

What you know and then you try and speak the truth in love, and they blow up.

Mom, you know, I'm sorry. I know I know you want to see the kids. We can't want me that is vile. We can't watch that kind of stuff with my kids in the room I'm I'm sorry and she blows up who you think you are, you relive your childhood.

There is a time when there is behavior among your parents where they are mockers and they are ungodly and when you lovingly try to respond to them and they blow up in the abuse where you draw boundaries around it and you don't reprove and you take a step back and you say the door is always open.

We would love to have a relationship with you. But when my kids are involved or my families involved.

If these behaviors this drugs these alcohols. These outlandish bursts of anger or this type of manipulation. If that occurs, then you need to understand the doors open, but we won't be back until that gets resolved and sometimes you have to set wisdom boundaries you can't in attempt to honor your parents allow them to destroy your whole family or to ruin your kids and it takes great wisdom and great discernment and and is always an open hand in your prayer form but there are times when because of their ungodly behavior.

You set boundaries for your family and yet you honor your parents. You honor the office, but not the person I been through seasons of that where just the behavior was so outlandish. You had to honor the office. He's my dad. He brought me into the world.

Thank you Jesus. But that behavior will not be allowed to impact my family. I draw a boundary around it and I'm to protect my family honor the office, I can't honor the person with that particular behavior got on question what is the next step for you to honor your folks. If your student here.

Are you cooperating obey. If your parents are your kids learning to obey and if you're an adult. Are you affirming your parents and are you mentally, physically and financially for pairing. That's what it means to ship right back.

If you're just joining us, you're listening to living on the Jew with Chip Ingram chips message award to families in an age of chaos is from his series God's boundaries for abundant living.

As Chip explained today rather than a rigid list of goals.

The 10 Commandments are really safety guardrails from a heavenly father who loves his children, creating a solid foundation for every aspect of life. God's boundaries provides a high view of God that will give you a fresh appreciation of your relationship with them if you like a better more meaningful understanding of God's boundaries. We want to help for limited time, the CDs for God's boundaries are discounted and the MP3s are absolutely free. You'll find God's boundaries resources on our website LivingontheEdge.org or to talk with one of our customer care representatives. Just give us a call at 1-888-333-6003 will trip. I know a lot of people who think the Bible is nothing but a bunch of do's and don'ts get turned off by God. It seems like some kind of spiritual bully like he only cares about the rules. Why is it so important for us to understand that the 10 Commandments come from a loving father all day. You need understand that God's boundaries come out of his heart and his heart is as a father that wants to protect his children and until you hear his voice, until you really understand personally not what someone else says about the Bible. But until you get into the Scriptures yourself and hear the Holy Spirit speak compassion and protection and encouragement in your heart. It's very difficult to see the 10 Commandments is anything more than than rules I have to follow and what we all know is we can't, in and of ourselves. And that's honestly why we've created free video resource called how to hear God's voice in Scripture it's five brief online videos where I literally walk people through step-by-step how to get into God's word.

I just find so many people that they just come at you and I tried reading the Bible and I just don't get it I or you and I read so many chapters and it's just performance what we want you to know is that there's an easy clear way.

There's a daily pattern of spending time with God, and you can learn to hear his voice and when you do kill direct your life is people who say have never open God's word and say I don't know where to begin this video series will help you start sort of that point Eddie and begin to hear God's voice and learn to study Scripture for yourself.

We were really excited about putting this in people's hands and it's absolutely free will is online video course how to hear God's voice in Scripture really is a great resource from Living on the Edge with your opening the Bible for the first time or you've been reading it for years.

What Chip shares take your ability to discern God's voice to a whole new level. You can do these five video sessions on your own time at your own pace as your relationship with God deepens your confidence will increase and you'll actually begin to look forward to spending time with them. Just go online to LivingontheEdge.org to check out this free video resource and take your next step toward hearing God speak to you through his word will now here's Chip to wrap up today's program as I've taught this passage I want you to know that the lightning rod of response is around this issue. Are there times when we can't honor our parents or honor them in the traditional way that we have, you know I'm supposed to do what they say you and cooperate with whatever they think and we learned today that the priority of salvation is one time you cannot yet honor God. First, the second was the priority of service God calls you to do something your parents. You're an adult they say forget it.

You you have to honor God's calling of the third was a priority marriage.

You can't honor your parents in a way that puts a wedge between you and your mate and the fourth was the priority wisdom. I mean, if you've got a alcohol or drug problem or anger issues that can hurt you your marriage or your family. You have to set boundaries. Now all that is great except for body into it. What I believe the goal of this broadcast is in your life is primarily to bring these issues up. I know for my personal experience that I hadn't thought these through and I always felt between a rock and a hard place. One to honor my mom and dad, but they didn't come to faith until late and they did certain things even unintentionally that I mean was absolutely messing with my marriage and I had to sit down and and sort of say hey you know this. These couple things we can't do anymore and I know that we came from backgrounds. I praise God in my dad's been wonderfully saved. But he he had an alcohol issue for many years and and Teresa's father was able to quit the alcohol but an alcohol issue in his background. There were certain things were. We had to have very hard talks and really get some things on the table. Here's what I want you to hear.

I doubt if you can do that alone. They are so complex there so emotionally loaded that you feel so guilty when often you're doing the very right thing. You will need either a wise elder counselor or pastor who you can say I feel on between the rock and the hard place. I know I'm supposed to honor my folks, but I don't how to work this out.

So here's my counsel. Let this get up on the table and as a couple. Listen to this and say you know we've been not dealing with this in a righteous way.

We've got to get to the root of this, let's get some help. Who should we go talk to and I think the next 10, 20, 30 years got a really honor it may be tough on the front and I can tell you from personal experience. God restores and repairs those things once you set wise, godly boundaries.

It will be hard but you'll be glad you did not go for it on easy way to hear this message again like Chip suggested would be to download the Chip Ingram app will have access to always God's boundaries, messages, trips, free interactive message notes and much more. Not only that, but it couldn't be easier to email order or give us a call right from the app to download the Chip Ingram app.

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This is the room saying thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge