God's Boundaries for Abundant Living - Declaring War on Deceit, Part 1

When someone lies to me it hurts they betray my trust and I get angry and I have it on good authority that you feel the same way to so why do we lie to one another and maybe more importantly, how do we stop today on Living on the Edge of you seven reasons why we choose to live in the broadcast great pointers on how we can stop welcome to this Friday edition of living on the chipping, Living on the Edges of international discipleship ministry featuring the Bible teaching debris Victor continues his look at the 10 Commandments with a fresh perspective on why what happens to our relationship with God, others and ourselves rely left of the teaching trip will join us in studio with a hopeful conclusion.

Today's message, so be sure to stay with us for that. Now with today's talk from Exodus chapter 20 verse 16. Here's trip the ninth command is God's boundary for truth, justice, and trust. It's the primary application to this command although it gets broadened to personal integrity, although it's quickly broadened to you telling the truth in me telling the truth.

The primary application of this command when it was given was it was Israel's court system notice as I read Exodus 2016 says you shall not give false testimony against your neighbor and let me play out for you how it happened.

Someone steal something from or where we find out that your 15-year-old daughter was raped or there was a fight and someone on the way back from this side of the camp. To that side of the camp was brutally beat up some two guys of the tribe of Benjamin and you're from the tribe of Judah. What you do with that stuff. Here's what happened. First, the personal fence would occur. You would do the investigation and research and find out in your community of people and you would discover as best you could binding some witnesses, this man or these people or that woman did that event, she stole it and then you would have eyewitnesses come before a judge and if you look at member Exodus 18 used to happen. Moses was trying to pull this off all by himself just just wrote. Jethro said hey Juergen where yourself and the people out and they developed a fairly complex system of judges over you know 50 and 110 and all the rest and then the Supreme Court type stuff came to him and so this offense would occur someone be would be charged with the crime and then the entire judicial social system was based on eyewitness testimony.

I saw her go into your tent and steel that I was behind the tree when those two men from the tribe of Benjamin beat this man up and so they were called to be witnesses. Everything about justice and social order. Hinged on people obeying the ninth command. You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor. Now you ask yourself, you know, that sounds like a kinda shaky system of people lie little bit.

You could have some big problems.

In Exodus 23, 1 to 7.

You might jot that down in Deuteronomy 19 versus about 15 to 21. There were some warnings to witnesses.

The first morning was is that if it was a capital offense and you are one of the witnesses you would be one of the first people to be involved in execution. In other words, if you said I saw those to kill that man, they would say okay you are one of the witnesses and they put the stone in your hand and you would be the one to actually initiate execution if by chance they find out that you are lying, what ever offense later in Deuteronomy 19 about 15 to 21. What ever offense that you lied about that was your punishment so the level of scrutiny was you better tell the truth is, if you don't tell the truth you find yourself culpable of murder and if you don't tell the truth, anyone finds out about it. Whatever crime the other person's punished for their gonna turn around and punish you and so the first and foremost application of the ninth command was to bring about justice, truth out of you know. Imagine I don't care how good the people are two or 3 million people.

He had people lined up from morning tonight with cases of judgment against one another as this command expands. Leviticus 1911 Israel's code of conduct is not just in lawsuits or eyewitnesses. It says do not steal, do not lie. Do not deceive one another, and so the idea was more than just telling the truth in a formal court but it was the year to be truthful all the time with everyone today. The New Testament picks it up and expands it even further. Where were to have integrity in everything. The apostle Paul speaking in of inspiration of the Holy Spirit in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 25 says therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body and the put off falsehood is not just in your speech.

It's your actions and your life you are going to tell the truth in what you say and how you live your not going to even leave false impressions by your silence and I think we would all agree and I had one of those good grandmother. She was from Scotland and she had a number of little sayings and we were Christians but we we learned later that you know she was and she had one of those little sayings about the "with me right. Honesty is the best policy in that great. The other one was chip if you can't say something nice about someone, don't say anything at all right you know honesty is the best policy. The fabric of human relationships are based on that one issue you realize that if people aren't honest with you if you're not honest with each other in your marriage if you're not honest with your kids. If you not honest with the friendship if not honest in business deals.

If you're not honest in the church.

If there's not honesty there's not trust. If there's not trust there's no relationship is just pseudo-relationship. The commodity of human relationships just like economies are built on money, relationships are built on trust and under. Trust is what once a person lies to you once lies to you twice what you think about the next few things they say a man in I don't if I can, but I don't know whether this is Paris or not. Right. And so we all want out about you.

I want people to tell me the truth. In fact, as I get a little bit older. I even want people to tell me the truth that I don't want to hear because what I what I've learned over the years is the truth I don't even want to hear. If I don't hear it. If people don't tell me all end up facing that truth probably more painfully later. Gotten to the point where if I messed up. Tell me show me, help me because it will be more pain later to hear from you now.

And yet, even though we all want everyone to be honest with us. The research indicates that at least in America were not doing too well here of 40% of all Americans admit that they lie on their resumes and in a research study done 60% of American adults said they lied at least once last week and in a book when America told the truth and in personal interviews, 91% of Americans said they rock.

They lie regularly about trivial issues. 36% said they lie on important issues.

Half of salespeople and don't take this personally.

I'm sure you want the honest ones say they lie to customers and despite all of us wanting everyone to tell us the truth. The truth is a fairly rare commodity and I want to just take some time now and I want to walk through.

Why is it that we like when I want to unearth only do a little probing and you know I live you lie were people we lie and then I want to ponder the consequences of what lying does to our relationships and then finally, I want to give you a game plan. I want to give you a game plan for personal integrity in your speech. Your thoughts and your relationships and if you got that trustee pin that I've asked you to bring wanted to pull it out and I actually want you jot these down because they'll be helpful. This is the kind of stuff that you have to get these notes out later in and get a little place may be near the water park bench away from someone or maybe late at night, turn on the lamp and you need to have a private talk with the Lord is with an appropriate deeply. Let me give you at least owe six different reasons why we like the first and most common reason we lie is fear. Fear SEAR at we we lie to cover up the fear of consequences. The fear of getting caught it's it's a good short-term solution. I learned it is an early as as a kid did you do that ship no. Why do I say that because getting spanked. I said yes you thing on thumb I can say yes I did that, but what you find out it was get you later and some of us are still doing the same thing as the patrolman pulls you over. Did you know the speed limit.

I didn't know I was unaware like my foot was a lock on the gas pedal is a new car.

These cruise controls in their work the way your weed is line when faced with something the fear of the consequences. We can have an automatic response short-term cover-up is to lie for the second time we lies when were hurt. The goal is payback or vengeance. Someone is wounded us. Someone is said something someone is taken something from us were angry and were bitter and resentful in the lie.

According to Scripture that often comes out of this is what's called slander or gossip.

And so we attack or assassinate another person's character we pass on untested truth or we make up stuff about people and I don't know anyone that hasn't been guilty now and then and even even in our marriages when you've been wounded and when you've been hurt. Have you ever found yourself lying in oak shading things about your mates behavior to make them feel really bad. Sure, we lie because of fear we lie for payback or vengeance. The third reason we lies because of insecurity.

Sometimes we just like to impress member being at a concert. Most my kids are musicians and I was at a concert as an outdoor concert. My son was playing and doing something in this kind of real cool guy can both imagine how you doing doing okay and he kinda threw some stuff that me and I was pretty naïve about the music world and he told me who he knew in this great world wide band and need run the sound for them and this and that and you nice wow that's really neat unit kinda took me and so he took me to the next level and told me this other set of stories. And then he told me no Clint Eastwood talking on the phone earlier that day and there would be get together for stuff later and I'm thinking I'm mature and I said, see that guy up there playing the drums and said yeah and he hated know that I thought well me to test this out. The drummer came to a church. I member when he came to Christ. I remember when and why decided to go back to Nashville to go back in the music and what he was doing and he said yeah that guy. He and I and we are we are we are like this man I'm you were like this utilize going back to Nashville and since I did know I thought I play dumb. I said no tell me said signed a $2 million contract to go back to Nashville to make music man. And I just thought to myself, this dude is so out to lunch. He doesn't even know me. Why is he doing this he's doing this for the same reason I have and you have he wants to him press me to give or exaggerate about something I me I mean I want to be trite but everything from your golf game to the size of the fish to Helen to be how many people showed up at a Bible study. Is it silly sometimes. You know you're leaving the Bible study coming people came all about 12 or 14 and there were the rate there were eight does the person care whether there's 12 or 14 or eight know. So what is it in you and what is in me tells 1214 yeah 1214 and then if you're married to someone like I married you get off the phone and they say was that you tell them what were they asking and you tell him and night in my life loving, gentle Teresa goes, so I July. I didn't lie lives around that minute we counted at the end of the night. We only had eight glasses out. Yeah, we did. That's right, something in us wants to project something that's better than who we really are. We lie about how much we know. We lie about who we know we lie about how successfully we are we doing very subtle ways out of our insecurity we exaggerate and we distort the fourth reason we lie is for greed, selfish reasons your people con you hate this car was driven by one elderly lady only to church and back in the last 25 years. That's why it's a 1956 and only has 9000 miles bad and my mechanic in the back pulled back the odometer. About 90,000 miles and this product.

I mean it's it's cutting edge.

No one is ever so McNair got guaranteed.

You are going to love is. I'm telling you George W. Bush uses this money I know is personal so he uses this. Your company will and people just lie we just lie and we con for personal gain or greed. The fifth reason we lie is what I call misguided helper protection. This is the category of white lies.

We want to protect others from the truth.

As a pastor. You get a lot of this at times and families. Meanwhile, it's usually these are people that have great motives, but how they go about doing life really is not wise or good or biblical. And so uncle Bob has cancer and uncle Bob's going to die and so uncle Bob wife and and one of uncle Bob's kids and the doctor get together and they decide you know what were not in the tell uncle Bob. We want to uncle Bob. Everything's gonna be okay. We really think you can be what we want to protect uncle Bob it'll be too devastating to be too hard for him to handle. We treat adults like children instead of realizing God gives grace people can bear truth. If you were uncle Bob and you knew you had a few weeks or a few months would you want to know. I would like the privilege to determine how I would live out my last days, and what I want to do and my mom, bless her heart.

She died about 12 years ago. She was like one. The wonder woman of protection and she always got me no matter what happened, that she she died a very rare blood disease and at one point because the circulation went bad.

She got gangrene and they amputated part of her foot and it gets more and more and more severe. And you call her on the phone she lived in Florida mom how you do I'm doing great ship everything is one of you know, it's just healing right up.

You know, and she was in one of those barium things with the oxygen and United call one of my sisters call my dad: neighbor in an mean my mom's story about her. Was this an reality was about hundred 80°. You know you can't care for people and you can't love for people when they don't take the truth and you know we we make light white lies and my dad earlier in his life as an alcoholic and our whole family system developed around hiding my dad's dysfunction and the dysfunction of our family, you know stuff like he could make and he loved to be here be here. He's really tired. We are what you are really tired when you down about 36 to 40 beers on one Saturday or how about the one some of us as adult kids, you know, my mom wasn't one of them. She was the glue she can keep the family intact, everyone's gonna love each other and if you this kid doesn't know this kid. She's can play the triangle game and bring them together, and if things okay everything's okay here.

I talked your sister what you call your sister in a triangulating is not only stupid and unwise. It just doesn't work. And so I would get a phone call and she would say oh yeah, it's good to talk to your dad is dying to talk to you. It would be. He's like asleep on the couch right right right over you.

Okay you know except the problem was she didn't quite get when we were visiting and we will call one of my sisters and my dad was cut out of it. She would say your dad is dying to talk to you here kiddo, and she was so badly wanting the relationship.

The work was she doing she's lying. A lot happened that robbed me of the first season of relationship with my dad.

My dad and want to talk to me that maybe I need to say that maybe some we need to get resolved on what the issue is, but you know what to have someone tell white lies to protect and create the pseudo-atmosphere like everything is okay.

That is like a Christian disease and it happens in churches. How many times have you had your pastor falls to something immoral and that the board instead of coming clean doing church discipline, letting them own his stuff get before the church, humble himself call what is what is go through a healthy process, grieve and pray that he can be restored. He's really repentant you what happens in the average church. He gets a call from God to go somewhere else. Often they don't tell the next church. What happened, and here's what I can guarantee your sin will always find you out so then three months later three years later some group in the church finds out what really happened. It always happens now.

Guess who they're mad at their not met the pastor are they who demand them at the board because as you know what number one, the board often with the right motives. We want to protect the church from this disgrace of Christ and how bad it would look in our community. Sin is sin. The Bible is clear and how you deal with sin and when dealt with in a correct and good white church discipline is healthy purging and purifying. But when people find out it wasn't the truth.

Guess what now they don't trust the leaders about the capital campaign.

Now they don't trust the leaders about the next pastor they hire now, you've done unbelievable damage because member with the issue.

The only commodity you have in a relationship is trust.

So fear payback or vengeance, insecurity, greed, misguided help and what is just laziness ever had someone come up and say, could you help us out with this and you so I don't really really love to, but I just can't indent you know and is just made it. It's just lazy. You don't want to go through the process of my schedule is full. I'm not passionate about that.

You and I aren't very close.

There's nothing about that project that motivates me. But what I do as I say, all I'd love to but I just can't know the answer. The truth is it doesn't align with what God wants me to do in my life and I don't want to do it. It's not that I can't, it's that I won't.

It's that I want to let you know in a kind and loving when some way that there's boundaries because my gifts in my time and my energy, my resources are in mind their gods, so I need to put them where he wants me to put them in, so we we say little lies but little lies go to bed lies.

Could you help us with this this and this. Instead of I'd love to. I can't you say well if you if you know here's what I used to do on my phone for two years as people as pastors do stuff a lot on my phone.

I taped above it all call you back in 10 minutes.

You know why because III kept saying stuff I didn't mean or signing up for stuff I didn't want to do. I'll call you back in 10 minutes and then I prayed about it and I get clear on it and then it got to where I got a reverse habit were people would ask me something and if I knew immediately say you know something that sounds like an awesome ministry that God might really want done. I don't feel called to that but I'm glad you are and I'm honored that you would invite me to join you. That's not something I think God wants me to give my time to do you understand what can happen when we start speaking the truth and how much of this phoniness under the guise of being polite. You have to hurt people's feelings.

You have to be ruthless with the truth, but we had to start speaking the truth speaking the truth in love. The final reason I think II said I give you six but this is sort of an outgrowth is that the final reason number seven is habit once you start lying about little stuff, you know what, I found myself this is such an indictment, I found myself talking on the phone with someone and they asked me a question and I hear something coming out of my mouth and I think myself. What's that doing coming out of my mouth as untrue as entryways look at what I'm to think what it's and it's immaterial and it doesn't matter but you know what unless you declare war on the seat. That's what this message is about working to declare war on deceit working to be truth tellers to be truth receivers to be people that are true from the inside out.

Unless you declare war, you will have a little patterns of lying and you can get to. It's just I mean is not even willful. I had one son who became an expert at one point time he could lie so convincingly.

A couple days later he was convinced of his own will and where we had a journey breaking. How about you, we were all thieves this morning. I'm getting the sense that I'm among the brethren and sisters of the liar hood right here. You do remember that the goal of these commands were not that anyone could ever keep them.

The goal of these commands.

Never could you earn your salvation. The goal of these commands were to demonstrate the character of God in his heart and his holiness and they were to be boundaries for us for our benefit and then we know from New Testament that they were to help us understand that no matter how hard you try, you will always fall short in each of these boundaries helps you know that you need to cry out to God for mercy and there will come a day where there'll be a Redeemer and a Savior who will make up the distance between you, where you fall short and is the blood of Christ. These 10 commands are always to remind us that word desperately needs. I can't be honest in my own power. I can't not steal.

In my own power. I can't not less than my own power. I can't have any other gods, but God in my own power right back. If you're just joining us, you're listening to living on the Jew with Chip Ingram chips message declaring war on deceit is from a series God's boundaries for abundant living. As Chip explained, rather than a harsh bunch of rules. The commandments are actually lifesaving instructions from a father who loves his children.

God's boundaries for abundant living provides a high view of God that will give you a new appreciation of your relationship with them, creating a solid foundation for every aspect of your life that something you'd like to learn more about. We want to help for limited time, the CDs for God's boundaries are discounted and the MP3s are absolutely free. You'll find God's boundaries resources on our website LivingontheEdge.org or give us a call at 1-888-333-6003 chip you want to jump in here, I want to pause just for a minute and if you're a financial partner with Living on the Edge. I just want you to hear a message that we received from a lady named Kelly who listens every single day.

She said thanks so much for your ministry and daily podcast I listen every day I'm a recovering addict of many things. I grew up in a Christian family was saved at the age of 17. Shortly after that because of peer pressure in school started doing drugs. I now have a few years of sobriety and God save my life and he is totally remove the physical words, use drugs and alcohol and cigarettes have now joined an awesome church that has small groups and Christ is blessed me in recovery meetings.

Anyway, thanks so much for sharing your life with others.

You made a positive difference in my life.

You know Kelly is one of hundreds actually thousands of emails that we get it Living on the Edge and I just call them life change spirit of God took the word of God and might've been on the podcast could been on the radio could've been in the small group could have even been a CD or a book, but God intervenes with their life and something happens that changes the course of their life and I just want to pause and thank you you know some of you write a check every month. Some of you have it taken out of your account every month.

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Twice a year you give to Living on the Edge. I want to remind you what it actually does. It's not about giving money, it's about extending ministry and changing lives. So thank you thank you thank you and if by chance you're listening in your thinking and I've never given to Living on the Edge, but I'd like to get in on that will give you a very simple way of how you can join the team and really make a difference to send a gift to Living on the Edge. Visit us online at http://livingontheedge.org if you prefer to give a gift over the phone.

Just give us a call at 1-888-333-6003 on behalf of Chip and the staff here.

Thank you in advance for partnering with us together. We are making a difference. Now with some final thoughts. Here's Chip in today's program.

We talked about seven specific reasons why very good people. I'm gonna go out on the limb and say pretty good people like you and me who really don't think of ourselves as liars often don't tell the truth.

We talked about fear. We talked about when were hurt.

We talked about insecurity and pride, greed and selfishness. A misguided helper protection and downright laziness and then as we shared the very end of the program. Some of us have just gotten into the habit of lying now let me ask you as you listen today which one of those strikes a chord of identification with you. I think it's very important to ask yourself why do I lie when I lie because until you do.

You just gonna be covering in been in denial, and the habit will continue if you got it. Why do you lie, why do as a general rule, when you don't tell the truth, and even small things, why do you do it if you got it in the second thing I want to address is what is it going to look like for you today to declare war on deceit. In other words, why should you not just to say while yet I know I do. Everyone does. I wish I wasn't this way and instead say I refuse to be a liar anymore. I'm gonna be a truth teller. I've got to tell the truth. Let me give you two reasons. Number one, the source of lying to member what Jesus said who is the father of all lies. It's Satan you know I don't know about you but if there's one person I do not want to be like it is him. He's the source of lies. He's the author of wine and the second reason is this going to develop this in our next broadcast is that lying destroys relationships.

I mean, it will destroy you will learn your relationship with God yourself and others so get quiet for a minute or two we you right now find a place and get quiet and talk with God and say Lord today.

I draw a line in the sand. I declare war on deceit. I want to be a man. I want to be a woman of truth and may God richly give you the grace to follow through. Have a great you know a great way to stay engaged and connected to chip and Living on the Edge is with the chipping remap will get free access to all of Chip's recent messages is message notes and much more. Not only that, but it couldn't be easier to order resources or call or email us directly from the app download the free shipping remap when you go to Google play or the app store. Why hope you'll join us again on Monday as Chip continues his current series God's boundaries for living until then, this is Dave really saying thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge