Relational Intelligence - Follow Your Heart, Part 2

God commands us to guard our heart with all diligence, because in all of life's relationships. Decisions, actions and words flow from our question how you do that. Thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge shipping Living on the Edges of international discipleship ministry between the Bible teaching of excited to have you with us because you're about to hear some challenges think about relationships. You might not consider real quick.

Let me Notes jump online and on the edge.org doing easy download of the message notes for this one. You may want to jot a few things down chips invited his son Ryan Ingram to bring us this message with us after Ryan's teaching to share some additional thoughts, so be sure to stay with well let's get started.

Shelley, here's Ryan Ingram with part two of this message, follow your heart. Not one of the things our culture has gotten right is our heart is of central the Bible has actually a lot to say about the heart and when it speaks about the heart doesn't just speak about your feelings or your emotions.

In fact, the Hebrew thought didn't separate the interior life of a person. The heart according to the Bible when you read that in Scripture means the center of a person's mind and emotions and will. It is the seat of one's moral conscience and affection. This is the heart is the interior you and so when the Bible speaks of it speaks much more broadly and significantly, and how we are to send and care for our hearts. And that is not separated from your mind, your will or your feelings but it's all of who you are and in Proverbs. If you would open up to Proverbs chapter 4 verse 23, the author gives us incredible wisdom. Okay, if you're not going to follow your heart. If it is not the best guide if is not the truest thing about me.

What in the world do I do with its because now I'm just confused. I don't know which direction to go. Ingram listen to what the author sets above all else, guard your heart for everything you do flows just underline above all else. This is one of those comparative statements were the same. If you compare your activity your intentionality, your energy and your time where you're put the most energy the most time the most focus and guard your heart watch, protect, preserve, more than anything else. If you do nothing else, is what he saying. Guard your heart. Why, for everything circle that word everything everything you do flows from principal Dr. Singh.

All of life flows from your heart all of your life flows from your heart everything you have done and will do has first originated from inside of you from your heart and so the condition of your heart directly impacts the quality of your relationships around voices guard your heart and our tendency we think about our heart, our tendency is to think our hearts are neutral that there just is neutral reality. And yet the truth is our hearts are deeply and profoundly influenced how we think how we feel, how we ask is actually shaped and formed by what I call the streams of influence they pull up the proverb again.

Above all else, guard your heart for from it flow the help me out springs that he's painting a picture here and I want to paint a picture for you. And yes, I can't help but get the whiteboard out and I know in the back and have a little hard time seeing this, but this picture is going to stick with you and it might be one of the most important pictures you see and you get this year. I call it the streams of influence because we can understand what the author saying here, it will reshape how you go about your life and what he saying is I just want you have yet heart in your bulletin.

I know it's not like Thanksgiving Thanksgiving Valentine's Day yet.

Here's what I want you to do. II want you to write your name right in the middle on the right mind right there. Ryan, this is your heart. The picture that the author is saying is, your heart is like a reservoir.

Your heart is a spring from which life are water flows into what the author saying this is your heart and like a reservoir has one place that it pours out that is your life. Your identity flows from here right your work, your relationships the way you love the way you talk that Jesus would say on the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The way you spend your energy, your time, your passions, all of who you are and what you do flows from here just one river coming out all of that what you treasure you want to know what has your heart Jesus and say what you treasure and value most, has your heart. Now here's the part weakness. The part we tend to miss on this is that our heart is constantly being influenced and impacted. That's the reason the author says guard or watch over your heart. Just like a reservoir has streams streams that are flowing into it. These streams fill up the reservoir and once a reservoir is full only out of the overflow does the reservoir poured forth. The question is what are the streams of influence in your life.

See, I know for some of us many of us past hurts may be trauma to stream of influence in your life this pouring into your heart. Maybe it's your family of origin. This pouring into your life, your self talk and what you say to yourself, the shame, the guilt that the euro never be good enough you and you have to prove your desire for acceptance is pouring into your life. Okay, let's let's get a little bit personal here social media. The average person we said last week spends three hours a day on social media.

I did some quick math because I'm fantastic at it. That means on average adults been 1095 hours per year on social media, here's the fascinating part, we all know and have seen the studies. At least I assume so time on social media platforms increases anxiety, depression, insecurity like we understand that this stream is pouring into here and was coming out as insecurity was coming out. His anxiety was coming out is a sense of comparing and never being good enough.

D. Again, it's home in this was going to hurt TV media movies binge watching. See, we somehow have deluded ourselves to think that I can take all that in and has no impact. And yet it is like a stream pouring into the reservoir. Now here's how were.

This is reason Jeremiah would say the heart is deceptive. Above all else is.

It starts as a trickle starts a little and it just slowly kind of fills up you ever seen something gradually change over the course and if you're if you're constantly there all the time. You never noticed the change for many of us, the state of your heart music don't muzzle my music I love music. By the way is watching the Grammys the other night. Love the Grammys.

It was one of the most dark Grammys I've seen Jesus would say it this way as a person thinks so they become when I was in high school I got into a phase of Nirvana.

Nirvana was big. Some of you just need to go will come up site and I had one because I had a snake and my parents would let me have it and I'm listening on repeat and I just remember being so harassed and down and not even known what because of the team.

We don't get it. We don't understand it but we just got a ticket and because like I like an ass, rebellious upgrade. And yet it is flowing into our hearts.

This is a big one. Friendships, who are the people around you. Paul would say it this way. Take note of this in first Corinthians 14 or 15 bad company corrupts good character like the friendships you surround yourself. It's been said many times, show me your friends and I can show you your future. Why because they are a stream of influence in to your life that is shaping and molding who you are; like Ingemar you ever going to get to God's word. Yeah, right now, thank you very much, think about this God's word is a stream of influence someone 19 says this. How can a young person stay on the path of purity by living according to your word.

Dennis is it I will seek you with all my heart.

How much of their heart, all of its why don't let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you because word stream and in-store heart godly mentors.

He who walks with the wise will become wise, but a companion of fools suffer harm who you surround yourself church worshiping together sitting under the teaching of God's word and then applying its seat.

Let me ask you how is your heart to some point we have to address and think about the streams of influence that are feeding into our hearts because those are the very things that shape our future and what we do. They shape our relationships and how they is a Relational Intelligence is this don't follow your heart. Guard your heart. Don't follow your heart. Guard your heart why all of life flows from parents, quick word to we are guardians of the streams of influence in our kids lives and that changes Odyssey as they get older but I'm very concerned that too many parents are handing their kids iPads having no idea what they're on, and allowing them to be shaped and formed and influenced by everything else in sitting on guess what, guardian of my kids and so on. But I know the type of friends. The music what they're watching social media.

I want to know the self talk that they're telling themselves because I want God's word to inform their identity, not culture, not social media. The secret streams we can talk about the streams that you don't want anyone else to know stream that you say was not hurting anyone else first one that comes to mind, pornography, the seeker's teams not only pollute your heart, but it will ultimately publicly expose in your relationships to their streams in your life that you need to dam up there are streams in your life that you need to put a filter on a Brita filter for that stream in your life.

Maybe it's with your social media. Hey I have a filter.

I just don't have any social media on my phone I don't get the newsfeed anymore because the newsfeed was messing me up like I don't want all that coming in at me. So maybe Nina put a filter on it.

Maybe there's some friendships that honestly or dating relationship.

That is, that is a stream, thus polluting your heart and you actually need to cut it off and I know that sounds harsh. The question is and follow your heart is are you guarding me ask you, what are the streams of influence that are polluting or purifying your heart would you take that picture and actually unpack it in your life and recognize what are the streams of influence that are polluting what are the streams of influences that are purifying and refining you like. We got to amp up God's word.

We got to amp up and actually commit. I get that this is a busy season and a busy place where you gotta get in a group and grow some people get honest and be real and go you know what I want to become the man or the woman God is created me to be and so I'm going to begin to invest in these areas. What are the streams of influence that up to polluting or purifying and I just want to give you just this one word here. It's a process. We kind of think I got into God's word and everything should here should change it took a long time to fill that reservoir up and I will take time of cutting off some bad streams filtering out some of those and pumping in fresh, clean, pure water, and as you consistently do that. What you'll see is your heart and your life will change in your work in your relationships and the way you talk your identity. What are the streams of influence that are polluting or purifying your heart and then this question for the sake of your and you fill in the blank.

Where do you need to apply disproportionate energy for the sake of your marriage. Where do you need apply disproportionate energy, remember, is said above all else that is disproportionate energy.

Where do you need to go above all else, for the sake of your family where you need apply disproportionate energy for the sake of your friendship for the sake of your future, listen and you can write this one and for the sake of your hearts. Where do you need to apply disproportionate energies singles in the room.

I want to just extend this challenge to you when it comes to relationships of this. Would you focus would you focus on becoming the right person over finding the right person. Would you focus on the heart work instead of just trying to get someone to meet you. In fact, I have given this challenge multiple times in this. The one thing that people come back to years later and thank me. In fact, my wife and I were on a date the other day and this guy stopped and thanked me for this bit of advice is said when you said during that relationship series that I challenge men on this man. We need this women you're more in tune, but you need this as well, but men you need to step up in this take one year stop dating.

Focus on your character. Focus on your heart.

Focus on your relationship with Jesus about three months on average woman your dreams. Once your life. All my goodness. And she's really the woman usually just let her know you made the commitment you can be friends, but you can't date and shall wait.

But you know what I've had the joy of having men come up to me years later introduce me to their wives thanked me for that piece of advice, and then show me their kids in there like I'm so grateful for its see because everything you do flows from here in your life.

And so if you want to have a great relationship starts with your hearts.

That's my word to some of you marrieds maybe been in relationship a long time would you focus on your part change over trying to change your spouse's heart.

We spend way too much time and energy in marriage trying to change our spouse's heart. You can't only God can so stop trying, and realize it's an issue of my heart got going to give you my heart which you change your listening to all the with us to talk about the message adjuster, but in case you jumped in late August. Today was Ryan Ingram with his message, follow your heart from his series, Relational Intelligence, navigating relationships is never been easy, which is why Chip asked Brian to come ensure these messages that bring such practical applications to the daily challenges culture is a powerful voice that influences our attitudes and our thinking so Ryan's fresh perspective on relationship building. From a biblical point of view provides the tools you may need to make a few course corrections for limited time, resources for Relational Intelligence are discounted and the MP3s are always free to order your copy or descended to a friend visit us online at http://livingontheedge.org for additional information. Just give us a call at 1-888-333-6003 will Chip I don't got a great application for today but before we get to that out. What we have that will help people put into practice. Some of the things Ryan was talking about Dave. I remember a quote by Les and Leslie parent who's written a number of books on relationships who make this foundational statement unless you first become a whole person that is deeply loved by God, then you will search to fill the gap or the hole in your heart by some person in some way that will always be dysfunctional. In other words, what they were saying is you have to be filled with love and be secure before we can have a healthy relationship and so what were doing in the daily discipleship with Chip is we are studying the book of Ephesians and what we learn is that before God. We are wanted before God were secure before God were valuable, significant and precious, and when we study those passages and that gets from her head to her heart. Then, instead of looking for love from people that will always be physical and will let us down. God says you will be positioned to be a giver and have the kind of healthy relationships that really last for a lifetime. So let me invite you if you want to really practice Relational Intelligence join me for daily discipleship with Chip if you'd like to join the short daily video sessions with Chip. Sign up today. Each video session will only be about 10 minutes and as the course progresses triple walk you through how to read Scripture and how to hear God speak directly to you through the first three chapters of the book of Ephesians the sign up for daily discipleship with Chip. Visit us online at http://livingontheedge.org for more information just give us a call at 1-888-333-6003 as we wrap up today's program.

I had an amazing experience. I happen to not just listen or watch online. I was in the room as Ryan was teaching this and I was taking notes and I don't know why I'm not taught the Bible for an awful long time.

But when he drew that picture of the heart, and then he started putting all these arrows of the different streams in and made the metaphor, the heart is like a reservoir and it gets filled up there whenever he gets filled up with then it overflows into your thinking.

Your words, your decisions, your relationships and for the life of me I sat there and I'm I'm drawing pictures and and I'm writing down all the stuff I just realized this is such a vivid word picture. It is so true, and I begin to think of how our hearts get hard and what the Bible says of God will give us a new hard and just passages were flooding in my mind. And then I looked it literally what are the streams of media of music of people that are going into my life that pollute my heart that hard my heart that make my heart insensitive toward God and what are the streams the people, the word of God. Beautiful music walks in nature.

Memorizing Scripture fellowship.

That's deep and rich, the streams of things that fill the reservoir of my heart with life and peace and joy, and they overflow into everything and everyone else. And as we close today's program. I have a small assignment that could make a big difference.

Would you make a picture of the heart on the sheet of paper and then I want you to begin to list and put an arrow into that heart all the positive things that are going into your heart of hearts that are life-giving Christ centered, and then I would like you to be as honest as you can possibly be, and make a list of things and then put arrows entering in your heart of the negative people the negative music. The actions the attitudes, the media, perhaps the pornography. Perhaps the current relationship that is doing everything to pollute your heart because here's the issue, your life, your decisions, your future. Everything about you will flow out of your heart and here's the decision today, you need to decide to stop some of the things that are polluting your heart the room in your life and today you need to start saying what's the one thing I can do to purify my heart, take a baby step say no to the negative. Say yes to the positive and say Lord I can't do this apart from you. Help me, and here's the promise he will, as we wrap up I want to say thank you to those who make this program possible through your generous financial support. Your gifts help us create programs purchase airtime and develop additional resources to help Christians live like Christians. If you've been blessed by the ministry of Living on the Edge.

Would you consider sending a gift today. You can call us at 1-888-333-6003. Tap the donate button or donate online at http://livingontheedge.org. Your support is greatly appreciated. Until next time, this is Dave brewing saying thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge