Danger Signs of Marital Erosion, Part 2

Today on Insight for living from Chuck's window. We need to pay real close attention to folks were with our children when were not there. We need to listen to reports from the teacher school. We need to listen to the principal. We need to listen to the coach finding blame of the teacher and principal are putting down the coach, you need to say thank you.

Help me know what's going wedge into a marriage relation quite like children who show signs of rebellion all too often husband and wife ignore the warning signs or they disagree on how to help their team get back on track today on Insight for living.

Chuck Swindoll continues a message started yesterday which identifies these pitfalls and he provides biblical wisdom on how to protect and nurture our most cherished relationships teaching from the Old Testament book of first Samuel titled today's message danger signs of marital road erosion is a treacherous thing. Probably because you don't know what's going on when all the while it is eating away disintegrating destroying slowly, silently, subtly, we began well by coming first of the cross and we come to our Savior and acknowledge that there's nothing in ourselves, we can bring is only by his grace that were able to approach him and take his offer of eternal life by faith we start our life with him by-and-by in the process of time, cracks brought on by character flaws that are unsuspected and undetected by others. Widen begin to take their toll in our lives compromise here and off-color statement. There some contamination from here and before you know it, like in the case of King Saul, that life once standing tall and strong begins to weaken and finally collapse erosion. What did happen in the building and what can happen in the life can occur in a family every couple begins at an altar or before the justice of the peace and they stand and say all the right words. The Calder valves. We had a lovely wedding here just yesterday afternoon one of our own staff members. Mary is a lovely young lady was a part of our insight for living ministry and it was just perfect. This in all the right things in several times my wife would squeeze my hand, maybe to remind me. That's what we said way back there and I nudged her we all felt warm all over. It was all just so good. Starts like that but as the bride and groom were reminded yesterday. Don't don't in this relationship. Don't let that happen. Don't give up on why would the minister say that because he understands erosion, dizziness, the whole time factor. The demands and deadlines life being what it is.

Before you know it. Both are busy at their work engaged even in ministry little slip here little slide there along, children have always found it interesting that brides and grooms and husbands and wives who think their lives are somehow difficult and and having struggle think they think maybe having a child will help. That's the first step toward erosion. When you begin the process of rearing the children and all they bring in, then there's not one to another, or do. Therefore, another hard to support their friends and their no schooling and there's always stuff of life and before you know it, you've lost touch you may be surprised to know that that's not a new phenomenon. It's happened since time immemorial.

My Bible is open to an ancient book filled with the stories of what we would call ancient people who live very relevant lives. Here is a very responsible man rearing, not just two sides of his own, but no one adopted son, whom the Lord brought to the mother in a very special way. As we just read, but things begin not to be unraveled it, it occurred to me that there are erosion verses in the Bible. Listen to a few. It was said of Samson.

In Judges 1620, he did not know that the Lord had departed from him. How could you not know the Lord is departed from you, but if you live the life Samson had lived lived in the latter part of his time you you can understand erosion.

He had gotten so used to operating without the Lord's power.

It was all about Samson José of the prophet administered to a wayward group of people known as the people of Israel in the northern kingdom, and on one occasion, the Lord gave José of the prophet the word to give to the people you so that when you reap the whirlwind.

That's an erosion's Hosea 87 is so the wind meaning what you're already moving in the wrong direction. And the more you move the more rapid the wind and the more the wind, the deeper the the decline until you have eroded. As you find yourself now. Jeremiah said similar words to the people of Judah.

If you have run with the footman and they have made you tired, what would you do when the cavalry comes and if in a time of peace. You trusted and couldn't make it. What would you do in the swelling of the jungle of the Jordan, if your walk is beginning to erode. When days are peaceful. What would you do would jungle fighting, it's and you gotta find yourself defending and you're too weak to fight. Probably the most familiar erosion verses from Paul's pen be not deceived, God is not mocked. For whatsoever a man sows, what, that shall he also reap you so to the flesh. The next verse says you will from the flesh reap corruption that's an erosion verse. Eli did not know that it was eroding mean you didn't know at the time if silent it's it's it's it's slow with subtle, there were no blast of trumpets. There was there. It was not a voice from heaven announced he would just daddy just busy about his work laboring over the affairs of the tabernacle. In fact, he did it for 40 years, not only as a priest but as a judge means little to us today. Since were not led so much by judges, but in those days the nation was led by judges. That's where the book just before Samuel gets its name.

A list of judges who were the authority of the people over the people. So Eli has a double job. The high priest, not just any priest, and believing judge so is dealing with religious affairs and civic affairs and political affairs in the demands of this in the deadlines of that before you know it. These boys sorta raise themselves. We say now day that you've never met Eli the first mention of him in all the Bible is chapter 1 verse nine where were told in the book of first Samuel that Eli is sitting on the seat by the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. It's where people and authorities said, who judged and who led those of that day. He's he's a priest he's a is the high priest.

Chapter 4 verse 18 we just read earlier tells us that he judged Israel for 40 years so this is no fly-by-night leader. He's been at it for decades and his children, his boys have seen them growing up all of their early years there daddy was the judge my grandfather Elmo Lundy who was really a well-known individual in my hometown of L Campo down in South Texas was a justice of the peace for as long as I knew him when I was born, he was already the justice of the peace. In fact, my father always referred to his father-in-law's judge Lundy. He was Judge Lundy, probably the most well-known name in the town.

Mrs. Judge Eli. This is the priest Eli today we would call him a statesman. Let me also add that verse 22 of chapter 2 adds that he is very old. He's very old verse eight of chapter 3 is also discerning that the Lord is speaking to Samuel and so he may be losing his eyesight.

According to verse three. His eyesight had begun to grow dim but he's still sensitive to the Lord's voice and so he's telling Samuel the voice your hearing in the mind is the voice of the Lord stay there and listen carefully.

So Eli is not become deadened things of God. He just out of touch with his boys home. He's not the last preacher to lose touch with his children at home. The people respected him, at least for a while and he still spiritually sensitive according to what we just read. In fact, let's get a complete picture and notice in verse 15 of chapter 4 that he is now 98 years old and his eyes were set so that he could not see. So in the passing of more time he loses his eyesight in the end of verse of the 18th verse Eli falls off the seat backward beside the gate.

His neck is broken and he died for. He was old and heavy well will leave it at that.

No need to make that even more clear. He is, he's a large man who has lost touch with his family still stayed in the stirrups still do this job still doing his job but his boys no longer respect him. It's let's meet his sons. They too were priests. If you can believe it.

Verse three of chapter 1.

I wish I could give all of this in one simple section of Scripture. But you gotta go back and forth in these first four chapters so bear with me here were building toward a case verse three. The two of his sons were Eli of Eli work half million for any house they were priests to the Lord there so they're younger priests there daddy is the high priest, boys are the verse 12 of chapter 2 just comes to the bottom line, the sons of Eli were worthless. Men they did not know the Lord. They're not the last preacher or priest to serve a church who didn't know the Lord good place for me to adhere that you need to pay close attention to whom you follow as your spiritual leader.

Be very careful very discerning who you listen to your watch on television pay close attention to what is said and what is not said looking what they write.

Watch how they lead and live here were boys who were doing the work of the priesthood in a perfunctory, even cynical manner, taking advantage of the people, even according to verse 22. They lay with the women who served at the door of the tent of meeting. How vile can you get Eli is so out of touch these boys are out of control and is going right on with his judging and preaching and leading it can happen honey. Pause for a caveat here sometime.

A dad does what he ought to be doing and the kids just go bad okay kids have a will of their own. Let me just set that straight. Lest you think I'm not aware of it but sometimes is rare, but sometime a father is done all that could have been done and the kids turn out wrong more often than not, however, the dad is too busy to involved and therefore out of touch. Verse 12 makes it real clear in chapter 2 that they were worthless. That's a pretty strong word would say in Texas. Sorry our sorry couple guys at the Texas expression God uses the word worthless. They have no plans to repent. There too old now or the to sit there too stubborn to change.

In fact, when the wrong father says something to them.

They don't respect him at the date they they they turn against his reproof verse 25 says they would not listen to the voice of their father Eli and his half To correct things a little late does not get the attention of his son. And then there's 1/3 boys name is Samuel, he's not Eli Sonny's habits Hannah and LK not have had this boy and have a promise of the Lord would give her a child when he when she weaned him. She would bring him to Eli and that she would have Eli mentor him as he would grow up there in that tabernacle, you know, maybe Hannah did not know the setting. Maybe a lot of people for a long time didn't know it can happen.

Erosion is like that these boys are making decisions behind-the-scenes and their lives are turning in the wrong direction. Samuel reminds me of a of a beautiful rose that grows in blooms over a cesspool flower the blossoms your swamp the bad environment, but the guy turns out great. He's never contaminated by the lives of hafnium in the house just occurs it may be by now, Eli realizes that the other boys are too far to help. Maybe is one chances with Samuel and he pours himself in to him.

I don't know what were the sins of the older signs will no reason to linger here needlessly but verse 17 of chapter 2 states the sin of the young man was very great before the Lord for the man despised the offering of the Lord; they would drive their flesh hook into the meat that was brought per sacrifice and they were to take out only the part that stuck to the hook and then those boys took out whatever they wanted. They they serve themselves and the people were an insignificant it was all about them. To make matters worse, they became a lustful taking advantage of the women would come for worship. You can believe it, and before long, everybody knows about it. Verse 23 Eli when talking to the boys is what you do such things. The evil things that I hear from all these people. People are not talking you can't live like that think it's a mistake like it is going to get back to the to the dad verse 24 know my son. The report is not good, which I hear the Lord's people circulate you see Eli's being worn by different sources. He's got the people who came to worship telling look at verse 27 of chapter 2. He's got an unnamed man of God, a prophet who came to Eli and said he gives him a little historical lesson on the people of the Hebrews and says to him, and 29.

Why do you kick at my sacrifice it at my offering, which I commanded in my dwelling and honor your sons above me by making yourselves fat with the choices of every offering of my people Israel. That's how we got fat. He fell into the trap of his own sons habit of eating more than they should. Taking what they shouldn't.

Now the Lord is reproving this dad saying you're beginning to look a lot like your son and you remember Samuel asleep at night and getting the remembered Sunday school being told that Sandy was asleep on this little cotton he wakes up and hears the boys and the stories in chapter 3 member sink pictures and Sunday school class that were on the wall of one of them was always Samuel is he sitting up on the side of his caught listening to the voice of the Lord and the Lord to Samuel single and Simon thinks it's Eli so he runs into Eli and Eli discerns. Finally, this is the Lord so Samuel lies back down. It happens again, and it does it again.

Finally, the Lord tells them what he has on his mom at my Sunday school. I never learned what God said he will give up three times and you never, never said anything what you said a lot. In fact, he said to Samuel, he said to Samuel, verse 13, I told Eli that I'm about to judge his house forever for the iniquity which he knew because his sons brought a curse on themselves. And he did not rebuke them to me till Samuel and you couldn't believe it. The very next morning, Eli wants to know what it is, say, so Samuel tells Eli so he's not only hearing it from the people from a nameless property. He's hearing it from the Lord himself through the lips of Samuel and his response but if it's a little pathetic. You know why because by now he is numbered with them.

He sort of fall into that trap. As I mentioned earlier, he sort of wringing his hands in chapter 2, verse 23, saying, why do you do such thing.

Why do you do the in the classic case of the passive fathers. Chapter 3 in verse 13 the Lord says I told him that I'm about the judge's house forever, which he knew because his sons brought a curse in themselves and finally just stopped rebuking this no longer. I want to add a word to all of us who are parents we need to pay real close attention to folks who are with our children when were not there. We need to listen to reports from the teacher at school. We need to listen to the principal's office or her office contacts us. We need to listen to the coach who said I'm asking him to leave the team. He listen need to ask why, rather than finding blame of the teacher are principal or putting down the coach, you need to say thank you. Help me know what's going on. Thank you for telling me. Let me hear what it is that you found out warnings are given to families along the way and often they verify our worst fears in John White's moving book parents in pain. He gives this story honey, a police car just pulled in front of the house. Jim and Elaine stared at it ominous. Even without flashing lights, a couple of bystander stopped to watch along with some neighborhood children curtains across the street were slowly drawn aside for a minute nothing happened in from the car emerge to uniform city police officers. One of them held the door open to allow the bedraggled youth to get out Peter Elaine said horse it's Peter that she was not surprised. Listen. She had long feared this very scene. Slowly Peter, his head held high and defiant walked up the path between the two officers Jim and Elaine felt suspended in the foreign universe when the trio finally reached the front door.

The bill sounded with unnatural clarity. Oh God, Elaine said softly, by all means, be sure to join us. When Chuck Swindoll continues this message he's talking about the danger signs of marital erosion and on tomorrow's edition of Insight for living. Chuck will identify four very specific red flags that will help us know when our marriage is running into trouble, and to learn more about today's topic. Be sure to visit us online@insightworld.org and then as an added resource to you. Remember Insight for living provides interactive study notes for every message. Please take a few moments to review this popular resource. You'll find the entire series marriage from surviving to thriving available right now in the searching the Scriptures section of our website. There's no cost to access these interactive study notes that you can print them out and share them with friends. Just go to Insight.org/studies plus Chuck wrote a full-length book on this topic like is a part sermon series. The book is also titled marriage from surviving to thriving. It includes an entire chapter on the topic we address today and there's another chapter on staying young as your family grows older.

This book on marriage is for everyone no matter your age. You know good marriages need to heed the danger signs and even healthy relationships need a tuneup every now and then.

The title of Chuck's book again is marriage from surviving to thriving available when you call us listening in the United States dial 1-800-772-8888 or go online to Insight.org/offer. We rely on your support to make these daily Bible studies with Chuck possible grateful to our monthly companions. All those who give one time contribution we couldn't do this without you. Perhaps it's been a while since you responded to the encourager to give a donation today.

Just give us a phone call listening in the United States dial 1-800-772-8888 or give a donation online@insight.or/Chuck Swindoll continues because the danger signs of marital erosion Wednesday on Insight for living. The preceding message danger signs of marital erosion was copyrighted in 2005, 2006 and 2022 in the sound recording was copyrighted in 2022 by Charles R.

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