Susanne White - Caregiver Warrior

As caregivers we have so many things that hit us all the time and we can't always nail these things down by ourselves. Who helps you what does that look like I'm Peter Rosenberg and I wanted to you about a program but a part of. Now for almost 10 years. That's legal shield for less than $30 a month.

I have access to a full law firm they can handle all kinds of things. If I get a contract put in front of me if I get of dispute was something doesn't matter, I've got full law firm that can help me navigate through all the sticky wicket is that we as caregivers have to deal with power of attorney medical power of attorney will every bit of it as a caregiver. We need someone who advocates for us and that's why I use legal shield to go to caregiver legal.com look on the left-hand side versus legal shield to selected turns purple this pick a plan to give you some options if you don't need to do those no selected checkout and be protected. Starting today that caregiver legal.com all this.com some years ago I met a wonderful lady, Suzanne, why she was on the program will � too long and she's got a new book out called self-care for caregivers. Her website is caregiver warrior and she is one and I'm glad to have you back. Suzanne is been way too long. So thank you for being back and I apologize for taking so long to get you well this program all I can be with you.

I will wait forever. I'm here very gracious of you bring us up to speed on your journey. First, it will get this new book looks at don't know you haven't met you before, tell us little bit about your journey yes I will be glad to get a happy do that. So I was a caregiver for my parents and other family members and so often I would feel lost and alone and realize that they don't tell you anything I can tell you about this stuff so I I was blessed to take care of mom and dad during the journey since any get along with mom. Well, I had to make a lot of changes in my life and I still got some to step down because I was a singer-songwriter. I knew that writing stuff down and journaling for me would really be helpful. So I cut a catalog no notes here and there so as I finished, they both are lost both of them within seven weeks of each other just thinking maybe some caregivers out there could benefit from some steaks I made. So I started blogging you know I came up caregiver warrior because I think the caregivers are warriors. I think they are out there fighting every day and I start a blog and website and it seems to be helping people so here I am caregiver warrior in China, save one caregiver at a time well and you're not a timid person you are a fighter, bring a great deal of passion. Everything you do, tell me about this book self-care for caregivers self-care for caregivers just came out this brand-new have my copy at all, which is a shame you know that I got you so so but about this book. I'm so excited my hands you know incredible processing in your head and put your hands up have it up the hard copy in my hands. I know I just thought you know what, let me let me jot down and as I was doing stuff on Instagram and all my social media and everything Adams media, which is a division of Simon & Schuster came to me and said hey would you ever think about writing a book and I went funny like you do something for you. Trust so we jumped out together and they have been absolutely lovely. I came up self-care for caregivers hundred and 40 tools and tips and strategies that I came up with and really easy to read. Jumping anywhere in the book guide for caregivers to help them prioritize themselves. What does it look like for you to be an example I know, when looks like for me, but what does that look like it looks like being self aware that that was the big ticket that drove me home was that I had to be self-aware Howdy self aware of what I was physically feeling when I was emotionally feeling you know I had to really lock into what was going on with me on a daily basis.

I say no caregivers need to take their emotional temperature. I really had to do that because I tend to be a control freak and perfectionist and I push my own feelings down and I'm not aware of. I wasn't as aware of my body and my mind as I should have been when I was caring for the people start to get snarky, you know, I start to get like emotionally start to get crazy, short tempered, frustrated and exhausted so you know I'm from me, self-care really began when I look in the mirror and said you know what you really focused on them. You need to focus on you a little bit like how are you feeling you know how they're feeling, you know what their temperature is going on the van what's going on with you and that's how I store the self-care process you been doing this well. Talking to the caregivers, and so forth there fighting this battle. What a surprise you about you through this journey means a things about you that you just didn't even realize you had in such a great question and it has to come from another caregiver. Chris is getting is a journey for every body for those we care for and for us every body every body changes. I think there's a lot of adaptation that you have to go through but I think for me, caregiving. What really surprised me about my knee was that how I can function being completely exhausted like I had no idea how we selling and I was. I know that I knew that I could get things done. That's my personality and not business. What I didn't understand about myself was how I was unstoppable like I was stopped for myself before I would stop for the people I love and I think the energy is on God-given you know I mean energy that we have is caregivers have to be really careful because it can be dangerous because we can run on nothing in the gas tank and I think you know surprise me how I can keep going and what surprised me was how damaged I can be from know that I we push ourselves so we push ourselves recklessly ourselves recklessly. It's something that cannot be changed and it it's when we become brittle in the process and you would've had that conversation before.

I want, when you get up there and you're starting to see people engage with this book. What are you hoping your readers, because I think the title of this unit been doing this for long term things that we do that are very obvious to us, but they're not a silly obvious to anybody else just because we been doing it out of time and becomes obvious right before becomes obvious and and so one of things that I tried to remind myself was that what I'm doing every day.

I just can't get into this pattern of doing out of expediency, that of necessity. Other people may have no clue how to incorporate this in their own life.

Talk about that in your book and how that's going to affect people in their journey yes and yes you and I really get Ellen and I think that somebody caregivers?

Like, you realize the caregivers you know you happen anybody out anything your caregiver. Second of all you don't realize how isolating it is and how you isolate.

I think that caregivers don't realize that you know they want to fix every body and fix everything that's not what this is about, we can control everything you know and I think you have to learn these things. I think that when you first go into caregiving you think you can do it all, all perfectly and you going to do it all alone. And you know wrong wrong wrong wrong that's not how it works in your you going to burn out all going to get burned out young people say all you know. Avoid caregiver burnout.

Everything located right out gets burnout that I would have to write good you care about somebody that would eat and it's impossible me with blessing in the goodness of our hearts.

We are trying to do something that is devastating for all involved. You cannot avoid caregiver burnout. My whole thing is you want to always caregiver burn it at 10 miles an hour or hundred and 50 miles an hour that's the thing we can control. In other words, if you're aware of yourself and you focus on you and you try to prioritize things that make you feel better in your life when you do you hit that wall caregiver burnout.

It's not going to be so devastating and it's not going to take you a week to get back to back to you better self.

You know I think that's the thing that's that's so important is that you think of some athletes. We have to be in the best form we can be body mind spirit, personal athlete, bowler: just a curiosity, what speed did you get the wallet. The first 100 mph and not what that's the message I want to get a message to his cat. There is no perfect caregiver and there's no perfect way to do it. And there's not a book by a book that can give you suggestions and guide you, but there's no rulebook everyone is everyone is doing the best they can. So I I went into it thinking that I had all the answers and I was going to do it and I understood everything I hit the wall and thank God I knew other caregivers and I called them. That was the first thing I learned how focal you know, surprisingly easy, because here I was so bad I was physically and emotionally so freaked out I was shaking I had the shakes. I was literally like shaking I I I I was in a state of terror. I thought something I just I can't tell you how upset and frightened. I was physically and spiritually and emotionally so scared that I thank God, I'm glad you do journey you've been on since that phone call your your helping a lot of people, including me, just very grateful to have you as a part of this book is called self-care for caregiver Suzanne will like caregiver warrior.com she's a great friend of the show.

Great for the heavy tobacco soon okay all right my love. Thank you so much and remember you're just brilliant the way you are right now Rosenberg� Hopefully caregiver will see you next