My Search for a Father's Love (Part 2 of 2)

Has the hurt in your marriage become too much to bear. Focus on the Family's hope restored marriage intensive. Can we work with you so you can have a thriving marriage you want. Find out how to receive your free consultation and help restore.com. Part of my purpose and calling is just seeing captive set free, healing the brokenhearted, now breaking the chains just all of these different here and all of these verses in my head and felt like That's have to do with the Snyder describing how God got a hold of her life and gave her a passion to serve others who are struggling as she did for so many years. This is Focus on the Family with your host focus president Dr. Jim Daly and I'm John John Lester matured a powerful conversation that you and I recorded with you. They have several hundred restaurants scattered over the western part of the United States and recently they've opened a handful restaurants are in Colorado. We are very glad about that tell you my son Troy and it's probably too often we say dad let's go. But what most people don't know is about the incredible challenges Lindsay faced as a girl as a teenager is a twentysomething and it started with the death of her beloved father when she was 17 years old and how that led to a downward spiral in her life pursuing relationship after relationship in search of that true love and I know many people listening to us right now can relate to that.

Maybe you have a checkered past, that you're not proud of, and you wonder if God can ever truly forgive you for the mistakes and bad decisions that you've made along the way. And if that describes you, I urge you to contact us here at Focus on the Family we have Karen Christian counselors who want to give you a different perspective. A godly perspective about how you can experience forgiveness and restoration and new hope for the future.

Just like Lindsay did and if you missed program last time point. Let me encourage you to get the CD from us or the download the smart phone app. However, you can do it. It was so encouraging and inspiring. It really was. So we urge you to check that out and contact us if you need more details or if you'd like to speak to one of those Christian counselors. The gym just reference our phone number is 800 the letter a in the word family or check the episode notes we got all the details. There not today were going to share part two of our conversation with Lindsay Snyder and about halfway through will introduce you to her husband John man we have talked about some really tough stuff and of the Lord. I think that the amazing thing in all of your stories just God's grace right and it reminds me of something that somebody said to me just the other day that God's love for us is unchanging. He loved you when you are not close to him the same as you are close to him. It's hard to fathom God's love is that consistent we just don't realize it right.

Let's go back to the point where you were struggling. I think you described being in that pit and you'd already had a couple marriages and now you felt trapped in this third toxic relationship and I think you described your spirit is just been crushed and crying out quietly.

I'm sure in the middle of the pain is very felt like that is where the Lord met you. There's people listening that are in the very spot right now. Different circumstances, but their encounter with the holy one, may be just around the corner. So in that regard.

Tell us your experience and I'm sure people are going to lean in and say I'm right there, and I'd really been trying to get my walk back on track and I was so distracted and troubled with the marriage and and just wanting it to work and wanting to have no just one week of peace and having things be okay in so it really email push me to just pray constantly and I was crying out and it wasn't always quietly. It was on my face on the floor.

Are you now crying out to God and I think that you know there was time I took a loan and went off and just would pray in and talk to him and listen sell yeah it was really hard and I just had already separated before and get back together and try and try and try. It's kinda crazy how it happened because I call I found out more in the marriage and you know I have had to tell myself, okay, got divorce is the one thing God hates you, know he hates lying lips. He hates people that Russian deal that shed innocent blood, like you know all the people that cause dissension and instead are all these other things and so I think that I don't ever wish that on someone. I tried to counsel people and save their marriage in every situation I can, and less. Of course there's very obvious things and and a lack of repentance to you is if someone does something you can forget them and you can you can move forward but there was time overtime. Overtime a long period of time of just there is not to be repentance there so will you. In that regard. I think this is one of the most difficult things you know when I'm speaking about my own childhood and somebody will come up and say I had an alcoholic father I have your type bed. How did you let go of the bitterness. I think in that way. How did God, what did God ask you for the better way to say that I think I have a little insight here he asked you in your heart you filter? – You cannot come in. Is that fair what it was for me is letting him be enough right because I was always searching for that tangible person you know what it was when my dad wasn't in my life is much that is that there and then just that.

Fear of loss of love and trying to use a relationship to fill that void. And so it was, it was really letting the Lord be enough and make me whole. And I think that that was the turning point for my life.

You know I hadn't had that I guess just peace of being okay alone. Until then, and I was happy I was so happy and I felt set free. I felt like he was protecting me.

I felt like I don't know this is to relate to that. It's almost like a different gear spiritually like a deeper relationship. I member my 20s feel like I was things that I should do. I didn't do the things shouldn't do. I bid the kind of thing and I just remember then coming to the realization the Lord.

While this I'm not living for you the way I should be living for you and that experience for me and it just was a deeper gear.

It was I'd say an integration where your faith really does begin to shape who you are in a deeper way. But is it so tough. I think it would be good to just move to know the things we cover last time the tough things now today where your the wonder of it and it's a good place. It seems like you're in a really good place now, but speak to that. I guess the importance of sharing faith on the right now in the country.

It seems like you one of two directions.

Either just hold back because you don't want to put it out there or you do put it out there and there's consequences for that you seem again very comfortable. This is who I am. This is what I'm about and that's okay. Yeah, I think that you were supposed to let our light shine before men, so I think that I wouldn't want to put it under a basket, but I also don't want to just be be out there and I don't want to make it about me. I want to make it about one on the worksite about what an amazing company and amazing people I work with and I think that God's blessed company so much she's had his hand over the company through so many different tragedies in different really tough situations but you know he's he's just definitely protecting and guarding the company. I can feel that and then on the other hand, it's like my life has been pretty crazy and I want to be able to reach others and help others by sharing my testimony your offering up in a different counselor words and just hope that that God can just receive all the glory.

And there still one thing that strikes me about you and it's so refreshing is just that authentic faith and I think one of the errors of Christian leadership is been trying to project some kind of perfection that they don't possess that no human being can possess right because were not perfect and you do such a great job of acknowledging just being authentic.

This is where I fall down.

And this is where I got up and this is where the Lord met so many people need to hear that because they're looking at leaders, when, why, I can't be like that.

The reality is you can't it's not it's not something special, just have different assignments within a burger.

I think your uncle Rich and grandmother Esther started in and out foundation. What's the goal of the foundation so they started in the 80s and my uncle and he came to the realization that he had been an abuse child and he went to my dad and my dad was kind of like, no kidding.

You just now putting this together opposite personalities but my dad had eat. It was very honest and in real my uncle was sweet, sweet guy, but function more denial and is, if so, I think that they dealt with it differently. But when my uncle finally realized while we were abused as children. My dad gonna was almost upset that he finally realize that, but my mom was really feeling passionate about and she actually joined with them and they start the foundation good. My grandmother and estimates to stop child abuse to prevent it to you know really and it's grown over the years, you know from different foundations different organizations just a few to hundreds and and even catching the ones that age out the Fosters assignment. All that because they need me to help but it's and I've said this before course, we have weighed no more Sophos reduction effort probably roughly about 5000 kids adopted the programmer through the program and it really is an area of chaos. You want to see chaos in the world. Go to the foster care system and Lord knows we need more Christians balder you know that whatever level commitment. People can provide. But I so appreciate what you do with foundation and does helpless because which I was one that nine years old I was a foster kid and it was it was a mess. Sean, I want to get you here. Welcome to the folks on valid program. Thank you for having us that don't talk a little bit about you two could you two met, you know, started touching each other's. I am sure you did something really great which you decided to base your relationship on prayer described that so I think from the very beginning we both had been praying for somebody to come into our life and I had always know I had started praying I just let the military started praying for a family realized after coming back from military how hard it was just about life with just the expenses and just seemed far-reaching to build a happy family supportive family site I was praying that God would you show me who I was building up to be a provider and a man to have a family and have kids and those were the things are just deep inside my heart and I think so when I saw God answer that prayer. It was like okay from the very beginning. It's like you go to God about this and this and this and this and get confirmation in just really aside from prayer, but also include other other believers for counsel elders and so it's our faith is been established from the beginning we've obviously struggled and had her issues. You guys to have issues and I've been married 35 years. And guess what, we still have issues and ideas of right from the beginning to set your relationship in prayer is really especially for young people but that's a noble thing to do doesn't come easily, right, and that was a great thing to do. Who suggested it, is she only suggested it. II wasn't where I am now. Today my faith.

When we first met I was raised with the background of faith, my family, my great grandfather founded a church in Los Angeles in the 30s and so it's been my family so I was raised that way and I veered off very far and came back and so when we met I had really just after serving the military realize that I didn't want to be in vain. The effort that I put out there and I just wish really hoping that God would show me why he created me and the question that a lot of people are.

Yeah, the answer want to be in ministry. I think with the way he's uniquely created us, myself in the art of personality in my heart for people on I definitely see him use those things for the sake of the kingdom and for really setting people free why I care about people and I want to see them suffer with addiction orders human trafficking and you are I want to I want to go in and I want to grab those people want to take him out of that life and shown that God has so much more for them in store for them. Just joy and fulfillment. So much there.

I was can ask you we we've kind of really no correctly can open for you Lindsay you been so generous last time. Talk about your life that we started today so Shauna got up a little pressure on you. I mean have you know you leaned into drug addiction. How did God pull you out of that so many people that are there. Whether it's alcohol abuse, drug addiction, people are looking to medicate some issue. So what what was that thing for you. The brokenness in your family. I heard you, and then how did God say Sean your mind will get out of here so I you I think you can come to the drug addiction come up can come about. Quite a few different ways from traumatic experiences are passing her childhood and even from the womb to be some generational things that were doing leisure and I can just be from just thinking that you're going to have fun going out making the wrong decision, and it can spur from there. So I I got pretty much sucked into that life and up on my own choices and the people I surrounded myself with insurance very toxic environment but asserted doing cocaine in many other drugs and long story short, after suffering through that is constantly the internal fight that you wanting to be wanting to get rid of that out of my life how I wanted to be done with it, but being sucked back in through the chemical addiction in it was it was tough but I started to pray, and I knew that I knew that that was the answer and one day is may be referred but it was my birthday and I had done too much and I was feeling like I was absolutely on my deathbed and which were there was such a thing is 26. Yes. 26 of the time and I just reached out to God and laying there, feeling my heart racing racing popping feeling like it's in a burst out of my chest.

I was scared to death and I just prayed and I felt like a light opened up in the top of the room and it just gave me such a glimmer of hope that God was truly there and was just there for me and so the next day I made a phone call to my grandparents and explained the situation in the allowed me to come live with them and so it was later really important role in your life. They made out yeah yeah for sure yes of the year they were and they wanted the kids out of the house at that time and my brother and I my older brother and I lived with them growing up due to my parents being divorce and some of that going on. My hope, my home so they wanted wanted to have an empty home and so by them allowing me to come back. II saw that as God's hand in them just immediately seen yes without even without any hesitation. And in that time I just kind of got away from everybody and everything in my life and my grandfather kept playing Scripture into me and arguing with getting arguments and I would have my worldly view and on different things and he would come from a biblical point of view and he never backed down and he fought that you yeah just he fought for me. It's amazing what some of the absolutely and you know the interesting thing is, my grandfather is is not my my blood. Okay, so he erased my father. He came into Lita family home and as his own and in the same way he did that for me and so I just saw the importance of doing that for other people, regardless of if there blood or your family.

I think we get so caught up in in just isolating ourselves to reach out and help only family and it's like there's some way other people out there that need our help in yeah so it was that process that got started shortly after my brother had passed away from OxyContin Xanax and it was just a little bit too late. I once had to start was asserted to clean up my life. I went back and try to reach out to him and was trying to help him get out of that life and in the overdosing and he was in the hospital was telling everybody. The only person that he wanted to see at that time was me and so I went to Solomon prayed with them and talked with them and just kept trying to tell him your God was his answer to get out and about three or four months later, he ended up passing away so I read another yellow really not use 22. Any castaway yeah and then I have had another younger brother that spiraled out of control. From that incident. He ended up on the streets homeless on heroin and mass so and were seated to the so today I he's gone back and forth. He acknowledges that that the Lord is the answer for sure and he isn't currently in a program and is about to finish think he has about less than a month left in the program that is in and yeah I'm excited to see so he is in a very good place right now and that that back-and-forth that yo-yoing so many of us know that either your own experiences or through family members or friends that have gone through that and that's not just the heavy part of life right and again I so appreciate her illness both of you and this is where many people live and the pit. They're trying to climb out of Lindsay I do in Sean jumped into the slave to nothing and the other work that you're doing here through and the foundations plural that you set up describing for the listeners what's happening what you accomplishing through those things safe. Nothing is two parts, hence the name slave to the number two nothing and that the first part is helping with fighting addiction. So let me prevention again or enough different rehab center is different and there's a lot of different great organizations that are out there to fight substance abuse and addiction so support many of those, like the children's foundation.

This is set up to support the foundations organizations that are there to the grounding of helping people and the other part is human trafficking.

It's it's huge. I think a lot of people think more people realize now that you know five years ago we started. I think there were a lot of people that thought that was 1/3 world problem and that it wasn't here that it's huge. It's absolutely huge and so I think you know as being able to spread the awareness in our stores with the can drive both causes you and we have information out and then being able to support these different organizations. There fighting to prevent sand fighting to rescue and set people free now that was part of the vision God gave me far army of love ministry and just part of my purpose and calling is just seeing the captive set free, healing the brokenhearted, breaking the chains just all of these different genetic here and now. All of these verses in my head and felt like That's that. So we have to do on the same page and so beautiful to be able to do that. Take the hard work of 30,000 people think of that 30,000 people working hard every day. The number and then, with a portion of the profits you're helping others.

That truly is the Christian message right take what you can to help others get through this life and hopefully to meet the Lord in the process. That's the course of the change can occur and I just I so admire that. I really do appreciate both thank you for being with us and so good. And again thank you for your openness about who you are and what God's done in your life on this. You and that's how we concluded our conversation with Lindsay Snyder and her husband Sean on this episode of Focus on the Family and Jim. It really is inspiring to hear how God brought both Lindsay and Shawn full-circle using the pain and the brokenness of their past to equip them for a really vibrant ministry today and it's a good reminder to all of us in the Christian community that no one, no one is beyond the reach of God in human terms. It'd be easy to write Lindsay and Shawn off as hopeless cases they've made too many mistakes.

You might think and nothing good will come out of their lives. You might be thinking about that with your own prodigal child. But God can and does work miracles, and we've certainly heard that these past two episodes and if you or someone you know is in that way would stay there. The prodigal wandering far afield from following the Lord, there still hope for redemption and restoration in that life in your life that we'd love to be part of that process and we can connect you with one of her caring Christian counselors who will listen to your story.

Pray with you and provide resources to get you back on track and we can introduce you to the love and forgiveness that Lindsay was talking about in Jesus Christ and we have a free booklet.

It's called coming home.

It provides you with the basics of what it means to have a personal relationship with Jesus and how you can become part of God's family, and that's also available as a digital download. Contact us today so we can share this good news with you and request a copy of coming home and connect with the counselor if you need when you call 800 the letter a in the word family 800-232-6459 Ward check the show notes for more and if you're able to help us out financially. We sure would appreciate that your ongoing support help strengthen marriages, equip parents and share God's love vigils and families who really need.

So please be generous with Focus on the Family coming up next time will be navigating the complex world of dating.

I think it's very easy to get caught up in the clutter of what you assume relationships are what you want them to be so any options of you know we we see people hanging out. We see people we see people dating intentionally or what I would call biblical dating on behalf of Jim Daly and the entire team. I'm John Fuller for joining us today for Focus on the Family join us next time.

As we once more. You and your family thrive