Praying Scripture Over Your Child's Life (Part 1 of 2)

Sympathies family was not in a good place. She was failing as a wife and mother, but her rest was the last three whole never give up helping writing a G on Jim Daly today so these families thrive working together can help rescue and strengthen more families like hers give today@focusonthefamily.com/real family in the Bible.

In the New Testament book of James. It says the prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working and that includes the prayers of many faithful parents were asking God for help on behalf of their children. That's our topic today on Focus on the Family in your hostess focus president Dr. Jim Daly and I'm John from John a lot of moms and dads feel ill-equipped or inadequate in praying for the children. It just feels odd to some of us when you're praying I really give Jean a lot of credit. She has taught me how to pray for. She is a prayer warrior. That's what Jody Burton's as well.

She's a prayer warrior and she's heard from hundreds if not thousands of parents through the years about their fears about praying or their sense of inadequacy, whatever it might be. Every parent seems to have concerns for their children. A course God is right there in all of that, though we got to realize that it is ready to hear your prayers and your concerns about your children, and today we want to encourage you to grow in that discipline of praying for your kids and it's going to be really insightful and encouraging as well and I think we all feel alone in this journey of prayer from time to time. Jody burnt as you said Jim is a person who prays a lot. She's an author or speaker a Bible teacher and she's written a number of books on prayer and she's recently updated very popular title of hers, praying the Scriptures for your children discover how to pray God's purpose for their lives, and we have copies of that here give us a call 800 a family or check the links in the episode notes Jody, welcome to Focus on the Family, welcome back.

Really thank you thank you again. Thank you John, just a big treat to be that it's good to have you. You are passionate about prayer. You've written several books about it. Over the past couple of decades you I think I defined you well as a prayer warrior let me go right to it. How does your husband Robbie feel about this taught him like Jane very kind label that I'm not sure I deserve it you mean deal I pray I have to pray a lot yes I'm very aware of my own failings and inadequacies, and I think any parent will tell you we want God's best for our kids and so they almost any parent has the makings of a prayer warrior. Just because we want to bring our kids before the lobby asked me, not Robbie. What did you sometimes men and marriage would be intimidated by prayer warrior wives like maybe I'm not doing enough. Is the man that deep question to start because it really is. I think a lot of times men say okay what this is mom's job. You know she's the my sensitive mind, the more in touch emotionally. The spiritual stuff is on her and while God may have wired us that way I would just encourage any man is listening to take up that mantle jump and jump on and don't be intimidated about 10 to 1 of the reasons that we updated this book was because I heard from parents. Both moms and dads who would tell me that uniting drop in a home where people prayed. You know he's not outside a church.

It seemed like something you leave to the clergy, the varsity Christians is a little awkward. A little unfamiliar folks would say I don't want it to be that way for my kids, you know, I want to take the mystery out of prayer. I want them to feel free and available to approach God like you how I teach them. So whether it's a husband saying hey honey I want to catch up to you or whether it's a mom looking at her talent and thinking wanted to feel as awkward unfamiliar as it did for me growing up, we updated the book and included a lot of material a lot of bonus material in the back that really takes all the concepts in and brings it down to a kids level like you can pray versus Hebrews 313 encourage one another daily sent an easy one, that a little child can learn and despite what help me encourage people to you that is good. Let me ask you though you weren't always in this place where prayer was good strong discipline for you speak back to the struggles you have and why this became kind of a lightbulb opportunity to say I need to learn how to pray better as many people listening that don't have a robust prayer life. What are the struggles that people have that you what I think we all painfully aware right of shortcomings you would like to tell you right. We all have the start of innate understanding that we need help from outside ourselves, and I did grow up in a home where people prayed, but I will tell you that when our children were young and I was praying for them. My prayers were kind of double I hate to say that an answer.

God wasn't saying that I was boring and but maybe I was because it was a lot of blessed them, help them on their spelling test.

Help them feel better when they're sick, all legit prayers, good prayer, no, but I just felt like I wanted something that felt fresher and more empowered and when I began looking at the Bible as sort of a launching pad for my prayers when I would see versus in there and think that's what I want for my kids. Let me wrap my prayers in that language you know and and I tell the story a lot of times there I children used to get in the car and they would just put their feet each other space and they call on the front seat. This is the best seat and it got to where in fact our in-laws came to babysit one time Robbie and I were with him on a business trip. My in-laws came and the kids were going in the car and they broke out in this normal daily morning fight of who that is that where his feet were in his face and pop-up says you know, if I were staying longer than a week we would solve this. You wouldn't you would be talking like this every morning was to get the car and our daughter.

I forget how old she was at the time elementary school. She said will pop up thing you aren't staying any longer.

You started out there you know I remember around that time going through my Bible and I saw Ephesians 4 verse 29 and it says let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it would benefit those who listen. I read verse and I thought, number one, God's been spying on my family. Number two exactly what I want. So instead of praying God help my kids talk nice.

I could pray Lord no unwholesome talk that Leon Hobson talk to my mouth and I was much better as a mom and a driver don't make me pull over, you know that whole line but let it be beneficial that it would build others up great prayer is so true in those early days. You also looks like a really good experience with the group called moms and perhaps a little late taught you something. So what did they do. Are they still around. And what exactly are.

I love moms in prayer. They meet once a week for an hour to pray in their groups are based around school community so you don't have to know the other women in your group. You just have to get the same schooling and theirs are pregnant need for an hour and the thing that I love about their strategy is that they really do ground their prayers in Scripture. So one of my favorite stories in the book is about our prayer group are moms and pregnant than we had pray just kind of as a routine prayer that we could've Ephesians 5 verses 15 and 16 that our kids would be wise in the way they act toward outsiders that they would make the most of every opportunity we know what that looked like we know how God would answer, but that very week one of the children in the group teacher gave them an assignment to write a persuasive essay in your most the kids in the class are writing a persuasive little second-grade essay about why my mom to get a new bike or something, but this one child wrote a letter to a classmate saying here's why you should believe in Jesus. Here's why you need to get you in second grade and this was a kid that nobody was friends with. He was a real troublemaker. He got left out on the playground. All that and Hackettstown write this and then he asked the teacher the child can read the letter very well. He was struggling in school and the teacher said yeah you can read it to your friend out on the playground that that he reads this persuasive letter with 10 reasons and you know number one I will be waiting for you in heaven. Number two have anything you want and have a number three God loves you these different reasons.

This will second-grade are laid out let this child into the kingdom of what I believe God's answer to our prayer that our children can make the most of every young man is well. I don't know where the new believer is, but I do know the young man is grown up and he's gone off and served in the Naval Academy and he's just still loving the Lord and ask intimidation factor you speak to that hurdle.

Not everybody has that is the obstacle. But, you know, just intimidation.

Does God really hear me yeah really do my saying it correctly night. We all think we need to sounds. We thought we have to convince God like you said earlier may waiting drop in home when it was done or modeled for us the day God commands us to pray night and he does it because he wants a relationship with us. He wants us in the same way like I look at things like being in a marriage, for example, imagine you're married to somebody you say I love you but you never talk that your day you never tell your spouse you what you need. You never thanked them for what they might provide, or parent-child relationship. You say a child just a parent can just give you your food by your schoolbooks. Get your clothes if the child is never asked for anything or everything for anything. There's not that connection and that relationships. I think God wants us to pray because he's saying not only is that the way I invented to dispense blessing in your life. But it's also the way invented for our lives to connect so that you can acknowledge me as the source of all these blessings and that we can have that that relationship you're dependent on me and that's great because I want to provide for you. You know, I would imagine because it's true's wife.

We pray for kid salvation is that when they were younger that they would come to embrace the faith. That's probably the most common prayer for parents were some of the other things that parents that you've learned parents. That's a good question, and in fact before I wrote the book I knew what I was praying again like it be nice to each other, but I wondered what other parents were praying and I did the surveys, and this was before Facebook, before SurveyMonkey before really even email site did them the old-fashioned way.

When I wrote them a piece of paper and have one question and it was if you can ask God to do anything for your family, what would it be and so I would carry around my purse and give them to you if I saw you in the carpool line at the grocery store and tucked them into our Christmas cards. That year, and I got more than 100 of these things back and you can into your question, what parents want you know parents wanted that faith they wanted kids who loved God and his word, but they also wanted character traits, wisdom, compassion, kindness they wanted kids to be kept safely. And that's a big one for parents I want my child to be protected and be safe. And there were people, relationships, friendship, sibling relationships relationship with teachers, coaches, and there were a lot of parents who were taken, Longview and saying you know I actually am praying for my three-year-old marriage partner or for their management of money or time. All these things, I kind of took the top 20 needs a request that I saw coming and shape them into the table of contents and I start digging around the Bible be like okay just got this and you know you know as well as I do, and I know your listeners know what, there's not a need working to face a concern will have that hasn't already provided for and addressed in Scripture so true, and I think you know you mentioned was that one resident think that's probably outside of you know, knowing the Lord for spring.

The next most often prayer that I've offered for my boys that they would have with Solomon right falls from Allison that equips us to receive all God's other big it's a good one. You have a cute story about your daughter Virginia waving leaves while telling a Bible story what yeah well it was around Easter time and we need the Hosanna story and the palm branch leaves. I think the wreck who believes or something in her garden but she picked them up and they were out there.

See Virginia and our younger son Robbie and we were all just mess around in the yard and I overheard her telling the biblical narrative of Jesus riding on the donkey and coming in and she went through the whole thing even to the point. She said Bobby know and they put in the hills in his hands and nails and she had so much passion just as about a four-year-old telling this story, and she finished and she handed Robbie the leaves and you tell the story Robbie and I thought to myself as that's what we want. We want our kids to know God's word to know God stories to history because I'm not getting it in our culture is not Scripture, and even today's churches. A lot of times are not teaching the Bible and pray that my kids will know and love Scripture because back to your point about wisdom choices are to be all abounding and to know which way to go in Philippians 1 we pray that you may have wisdom and depth of insights he can discern what is best to be coming up against these choices whether there four years old 14 years old or 40 years old and you know what to do and Scripture is what will equip them to do that.

Jody this next question really comes out of the heart from being a believer right to know the Lord at 15 years old and my football buddy on the high school football teams parents gave me my first softcover Bible and they wrote in their John 1010 a lot of their lives on in the Bible. I was raised in a Christian home, some looking through first John second John third John finally got a job sometime but the Scriptures straightforward and in the reason I'm mentioning this is its me. One of the most applicable Scriptures in the world we live in today and it says the thief. Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy. But I've come.

But you might have life and life more abundantly. So when you're looking at the context for our children. How do we as parents resist the devil is a good model and how do we pray something positive for children that they too may have that kind was yeah I love that varies. John 1010 in a different translation. Some say I've come to give you a rich and satisfying life and abundant life. It's a good one for our family, our daughter Virginia lives big and she loves that verse one time she was traveling abroad and my husband had given her read her the riot act about being safe and and what to do and what not to do when she's with a bunch of friends and we get a picture. She sent us of herself strapped to a guy whose name was Ali waited 90 more than that. Jumping out of an airplane and on her palm. She written John 1010 but II love that when I feel like for our kids. They need to know that Jesus is fun that when they put their trust in him that they are can have a rich and satisfying life. Not saying a life without problems. He obviously never promises us that in fact those of us who follow him a long time, sometimes know you hit more hard knocks and falling and then it feels like but I'm all about making Scripture making a face doable and fun for kids at the back of the book I share strategies for that one my favorites is we call it and and you growing up in a home where he didn't know the Lord would love this.

We caught the happy hope game and it's just after dinner and it's really a spin on sharing a praise report or a prayer request but you know, for kids they hear what your praise report or what your prayer request you know that can be a little intimidating and a little like all great there was mom on her church platform again or if you have a friend at the dinner table like say your football buddy had invited you to his home. You might've been a little intimidated if his mom and said what your prayer request and so it might happy hope game and it's just simply tell me one thing that happened this week you happy about.

That's a praise report now and tell me something that you hope this can happen will. That's a prayer request and whether the kids know it or not, as the parent. I can take those things back to my prayer Journal later and remember to pray for them and I love there's another Pete Greg.

He read a book on how to pray and he made the point that God sometimes listens to our casual conversations and receives them as prayers and he takes out of Malachi 316 where Scripture says that those who fear the Lord talked among themselves and listened and heard, and I love the idea that God is listening to our dinner table conversations and so only playing the happy hope game. He knows that as a mom, I'm listening to you say, I'm really happy that we won the football game and he knows that I'm saying thank you Lord for giving in that time of fellowship and that when you are also on Astro to go the that parent who's listening right now who is struggling with 13 major roads moving in a really bad direction. Maybe drugs are in the home, slightly like that and that to me is evidence of John 1010 as well. The steel destroyed part. This is the destructive path. A child can choose and it's can occur sometime in that the loose change your share. How do they pray with any confidence is right now in the moment it looks hopeless. It does look hopeless and I I was that parent. We had four kids and I think probably anybody has more than one get even if you have one, get you know they make things wrong dates that happens you know it doesn't just as you have a Christian home didn't mean that you have these guaranteed straight narrow kids.

I would say that parent first of all, you're not alone.

God knows exactly how you feel.

He's watched us make the dumbest decisions walk the wildest pads and he loves your child more than you do. You might think that a your reach either physically because they're not home or even just emotionally there, sitting across the table, but they don't want to listen to you, but they never had a God's reach and so I would just encourage that parent to just keep lifting their child before the Lord, bringing his name her name, their needs and trusting that your heavenly father who loves them more than you do power than you do in our prayers. They laid on the tracks for God's power to come through.

We don't do the fixing the providing we wish we could but I love my favorite parenting prayer.

When I had teenagers was out of Philippians 213, Paul says it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose and as a mom. I so felt like it was on me. I need to work in my kids so that they would will, and act they would desire and do good things that we can't write none of us can, but God can. And so I would to seek work in Virginia's heart to well and to act to line up with your good purpose. Let me ask you, in that context is a mom mom's.

This is close to their heart and I'm sure some doubts true but I'm just saying the moms are talking to my Jean. The same thing and you are so often that fear and control can take hold of you and it's very hard to say Lord okay to give my child over to you right now and that the is followed up by certain behavior changes right, you reduce your control and make sure you trust God in certain ways, you become more faithful toward your parenting of the child and that is a process is speak to the mom who is struggling in the battle between fear and control and trusting God for the outcome. Yeah that that's such a good question and one that I wish I could say I had learned once and for all. Would it be great if we can say that I trust you and then you know we screwed that courage to the sticking place and it's never left new all different degrees didn't embrace new degrees, new problems crop up God's faithful one. In one situation and another child or another event happens and you gotta take it right back to the drawing board.

You got really did a gentle but hard work in me, as I said to him, Lord, that went dark. Things were not going like they would in my kids lives for a season on their making some bad choices and there were just some bad things happening that maybe weren't a result of a choice but and I remember saying, Lord, trusted you know you're a good guy. I know you love my kids. It's going on and he looked at me and he just said you know Jody you can trust me you trusted in an outcome he trusted in your agenda how you think that things should work and in your timing and he said yeah this is painful, but trust me because I see the big picture and I'm shepherding and leading, and as Romans 828 reminds us working in all things for the good of those who love me and Jody in that regard. Right at the end here and I think a good take away for the parents. Listening right now would be suffering plays a role in jobs economy. It accomplishes something deep in people and it's not that we run from it. We should runs right but how to equip our children to abide in that.

Yeah, yeah. While that's a big one is such a big one and I think you know we can check ourselves into thinking that doesn't want us to suffer. But like I was just reading this morning in Philippians 1, and Paul says tell the believers he's like you've been counted worthy to share in his glory and his suffering and like what you mean I should be thankful that I get to count happy to be in his suffering, but he does use it to refine us to shape us and it's no fun and it's for a parent. I think it's really hard to watch your child suffer. There's nothing harder, but we just can be confident that God will use all of that, the good and the bad is good purposes and I think in doing that when you can get to the place, then the Scripture that says my burden is light. My yoke is easy, that's evidence of that. When you can really abide in the difficult circumstance.

Trusting.praying for your child. Leaving in the future of the child, even if they're in the volume of easy. I don't know you might, listening to all she says. Just trust me and I would encourage someone to if there in that valley in that dark place to reach out to a friend.

I really believe in the power of multiplied prayer says where two or more come together. I'm in the midst, and there were times in our kids growing up years when there tell the story in the book when her son was in kindergarten and he struggled so much with self-control that I just wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes and put them out on the street corner because I'm like he's gonna wind up there anyway, so why bother trying to parent him or raise him to be godly because I give up and I had some girlfriends who came up alongside me. People in my moms in prayer group and others said you know you don't have the faith right now to believe. For this you can even see the needle moving will pray for you will lift up your son will carry that burden while you and with you and I'll tell you they did that for me for over a year and and got moved. He moved, and I will say if you met my son now is 25, you would never know that he struggled with self-control. Self-discipline with anger issues were all it wasn't this instant answer. You know he was a high school athlete, a college athlete. I think sometimes that's the other thing you know that the passion that's in there that can come out his anger can also be a passion that in the hands of God can allow for victory in the sports field unites two different sites that point so I would just say hang in there, but get yourself some friends will carry that with you for this beautiful approach and we need to be different were not the one in the valley with the one that's always with those who rejoice and mourn with those in exactly right Jody.

This is been terrific. I think you've caught the theme of what were talking about here. Come back again tomorrow. Continue this discussion and talk about maybe technology and how that interferes the busyness of life how that interferes with praying to God really think about.

I can't believe I'm as guilty as anybody else how we get distracted in our prayer time, whatever that might be working to hit some of that busy mom and the only time you have to praise when you're loading laundry maybe or doing some other thing working and coming home and trying to care of the kids get it working the coverlet next time and I want to encourage you to contact us here Focus on the Family on you know, multiple levels. If you're in need of our counseling department. It's free. We will call you back usually have to do that and will talk with you about some ideas and things in Roger with resources even to get to the better. Next up also and will send a copy of Jody's book playing the Scriptures for your children if you can help us in the ministry of service. A gift of any amount seriously any amount and will send you the book is our way of saying thank you on behalf of those families you're going to touch the partnership be very helpful and I don't join us next discussion were phone call away and hundred K word family or click the link in the episode notes and let us know how we can help Jody again.

It's been great to have you with us will be back next day. Thanks and on behalf of Jim Daly, and the entire team. Thanks for joining us today for Focus on the Family and plan to be with us next time.

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