Trusting God in Adversity

Jesus has promised us that in this world, we will experience tribulation, sorrow, suffering Mary Herndon says most of us have areas of life where we think it would be unfair for God to visit us with sorrow or suffering. I think in life we have things like we really learned we would go to Africa and surfing with administrative rights support will do whatever I think if we're honest with ourselves. We all have an untouchable list. You can do anything else will go anywhere you want us to get not my child, not my marriage not my grandchild and everything felt like God was just in my finger's lease of the things that were heaviest on my heart heavy on his team. He cares about the same things we do. Sometimes the things that we grip the tightest are the very places he wants to get in there and work. This is family life today. Our hosts are Damon and Wilson Bob Pino fund of someone family life today.com what we do when suffering that is unexpected visits us when something that was on our untouchable list is all of a sudden being here today how one couple is learned to deal with that. I'm drawn closer to God's welcome to family life today.

Thanks for joining us.

I don't think many of us realize when we get married that there are going to be detours that are to come away times of sorrow and suffering that will hit us unexpectedly and most of us are probably not fully prepared for the detours when they come yet we say, for better for worse. And honestly you even when I got married and now is a pastors doing weddings. I don't think very many couples think they'll be much of the workplace think they want to think about it because it's scary to think what the worst could be when you're hopeful that your wedding day and you see the glory ahead and there is glory ahead, but there's also good to be challenge ahead and effectively to meet a couple today, who are a part of family life staff Chris and Mary Herndon speak at our weekend. Remember, marriage getaways, Chris serves as the chief operating officer for family life and gives leadership to a lot of what we do here. Their great couple and they been on a little bit of a detour journey. Recently they wrote about this in a devotional book that family life release recently called the story of us where it's a 52 chapter devotional, so a devotional week for couples to go through and they're not the only authors know you're in there. It isn't just the story of them.

That's right, you guys are in there I everybody there so we got people from our speaker team from our staff. You can find out more about the devotional on our website@familylifetoday.com but you were there when I sat down with Chris and Mary a small gathering recently and asked them to share a little of their story and the journey got 10 you guys have experiment on a journey over the last couple years.

That was an unexpected journey for you and it began with you heaven's medics are just sending Bible study and has some weird vision things really started a lesson learned much of it and over the next couple weeks, it would happen multiple times since. I finally between Chris and I and our daughter checked out in physician was like yeah I think if you started some other things going on and wanted us to get an MRI and we're thinking in the next eight weeks and using tonight, and so on.

The MRI said that ball golf ball size tumor is a brain tumor in this the center of my head right on my brainstem and Salic you remember when the called and said is a bridge in the offices of and are in the hospital that night they sent us to the hospital because the doctor said you get in and out there than anywhere else in so we did had a CT scan and it was clean and the physician said you really like to do an MRI. Sometimes it'll pick up stuff so we come back and see something on the screen MRI and I just remember looking at the screen is dumbfounded like I can only so they would not let us go home.

The conversation was we allow you to drive your wife to the hospital.

The hospital wants so you here immediately in a holy world with.

There's something in your brain after brain surgery that that put you on a journey to try to figure out what's the best process you want to bone MD Anderson in Houston for diagnosis and for treatment but were they telling you where did you have a sense of whether this was benign and malignant.

Would you know they had a very strong sense that it was benign.

That was an acoustic aroma which was very grateful for that. The difficulty was its location is manager said so it's almost like if you draw a line between your two years and is in right in the middle very difficult to get to and surgery would be extremely difficult, and it was about 13 hours and the risk associated with the surgery related to your hearing. My timber was tangled in three nerves that would be the nerve that controls her face your hearing nerve and your balance nervous or to get out.

They knew there's no way to get out without damaging seminaries and so they damaged my hearing nerve cell lost all hearing on one side and it's completely gone, which is good if there's a noise right you completely that my balance nerve on that side of my face was just talk about the fear I don't feel like when into it.

I don't remember that feeling like they got was preparing that this was going to be the end for me and member. I went to lunch once with Barbara Rainey and she was like okay I know what you're telling bias. What was the real story and I think when you going to difficult surgery.

Sometimes you think, what's the worst that could happen here and I remember the feeling as a believer if you wake up in the arms of Jesus. Bad thing. Thanks for your family but personally that's not bad if things go well, that's awesome to I think with brain surgery. You think the worst case scenario would be if I wake up and not me again and I'm not able to be a mom or a wife in the same way that I was before and you want to be a burden to your family and so that would have been the worst case scenario about you yeah think I would align with that thinking, but I would think of her middle daughter in prom and she were able to get married that her mom would be with her and it's amazing where your mind goes 13 hours. His presence was always there.

We have experiment with Mary and have her tumor always looked at people in in situations like this and go where does that strength come from thinking when you're not in the moment you think I don't know that I have and I realize that if you're not in the moment.

You don't need but in the moment God provides and so you can be outside the moment thinking. I don't know that I'd be that strong. But in the moment your that strong because God loves you with grace in your weakness.

His strength is his perfected so living now with a disability are there, you find it challenging to find yourself going down why why this why is this my life to challenge anything you have to laugh to hold my hearing about it. I think especially the Western world. When difficulty comes your way, we sometimes have a tendency I just wanted to go away as quickly as possible, with no fallout and I think from the very beginning.

I just pressed upon our life in our hearts that our lives are not our own, and that he really can be trusted and we went into it with the prayer like Lord, brain tumors are too hard to help us to walk the journey. Well, don't waste our teamwork and help us to be a blessing in other people's lives and shape our character through this in some way so that was our prayer we do work in the store, to some degree we can remember. And it's almost a man or woman, I think tumor and they're walking it in Mary's has opportunity to encourage their uniquely we talked before, when our kids were still at home.

We talked about the fact the kind of grit your teeth and send this but I said to Mary on one point it would be easier for me if you were suffering was something that if one of our kids was suffering was something I think that's just because we know were grown-ups were adults we know we can pump it up. Your kids are going through it. It's a tough deal. You have that experience happen then the year after you have had your surgery. So tell her what happened with your son and we picked Charlie he was gone for a weeklong camp in Arkansas. We picked them up on Saturday morning and had about an hour and 1/2 drive back home in Little Rock and he just fell asleep in the car which for him is not necessary completely unusual just probably thought you have sleep or poorly, that we Saturday to Thursday he would always run fever in the afternoons. It would give him that one it would break Thursday Mary took into his primary and said is probably a virus that will run its course in a few days by Sunday if you still running a fever called me and he was we did and he the doctor said, thinking to Children's Hospital little admitting checking out. Make sure everything's okay and run a barrage of tests and about two days later they had determined that he had developed Mercer bacteria that had just settled in the middle of his liver.

Somerset is that antibiotic resistant foreign staff no idea where it came from. We since he had a tooth pulled in May in preparation for braces to teasing one of the infected recalled his dentist and she gave a matzoh cylinder some very simple today's letter was gone.

He really didn't think about it, but if we had to guess that's my right so he's in children so diagnosed with Mercer. It's been about a resistant so they didn't know what to do and we watched our son and a guy from healthy kid to having right now is hundred and 40 pounds in getting down to like 92 in a feeding tube in his favorites would get to the point where you getting medicine for fever. Instead of going down at Bella is his vitals were tanking in they were doing everything they need to do and it wasn't working and we we knew it was serious. We learned in the first week was their worldly 15 reported cases of someone with Mercer in the liver and he was the 51 beautiful people are already severely compromised with leukemia or some other really life threatening illness and your right knee Children's Hospital integrate hospital clues. They did not know the course of treatment in every day.

He was just getting worse and worse and as a parent you just feel helpless and you're right about that comparison of a spouse, and your kid. It is different, you talk about that you came to work sense is that I went to work, but Mary is a mom used to leave Charlie and would spend the night in the hospital every night. We still did have a daughter in she's a senior at the time said I would go and staple 10 o'clock at night and then I would. Typically, the doctors would round about 9 o'clock in the morning and am a morning person so I would go into the office and I will work for an hour and 1/2 and then try get hospital every morning and then gauge what the day would enfold Rob to stay in have continued to support or if it was a kind of a holding pattern day I would go back to the office that morning back into the parking lot that the seven 9045 our program for North Bay at 730 to 8 and this is July 18.

It was 10 days after we figured out what was going on with Charlie and the atrophied tremendously.

That was the first day that Ron and man were sharing about their story and their story, what is the loss of their son Connor who at age 12, died from Mercer infection from a staph infection.

This yet and we knew the story very intimately in their sharing that on date 10 is unfortunately when I lost Connor and I am sitting in the car listening this program and about 745 when they say that I just had this question only you getting ready to go into work and it just don't know me again that this is day 10 for Charlie suffering a car going to the hospital and is one of those days I think we have them all worth submittal snapshot in your mind of your life. You go back to surveys is the kid or whatever you can see it in color. You know what you can smell it. It's just one of those days that was one for me and in the afternoon or work Charlie does have a conversation and he just says to me like I don't think I'm ever to leave this room and tell your first reaction is complaining of these in the hospital would 10 days line in the bed he can't get up his miserable. He's throwing up all the time. You can keep food down.

He got a feeding tube, but when I looked at him what he meant was like this is to 10 o'clock Seleucid and Brian yesterday morning shared a question Jesus asked his disciples exact same question Jesus as a 20 minute drive home when I'm doubting angry, helpless Chris say I am stating my faith.

It is Jesus who drove a little bit deeper for me. So that was a 10 on day 23 continued to digress the decision was made that he need to be airlifted to Cincinnati in one of the toughest things in my life have ever had to do was watch the door close and the second aim is to go back to the hospital car was middle daughter and I got in the car the next morning we drove 10 hours to Cincinnati to join them. He spent another 30 days. Cincinnati, the good news is, there was a breakthrough just because there was no one else like him.

There was no protocol of how to treat himself know when you have a surgery. Sometimes they give you all the things that could go wrong and for us it was a blank sheet of paper because they didn't know what what it would be and he was taken the strongest antibiotics five or six highest taxes in and so is a mom I think reached the point we are like we knew Nan and Ron we needed the risks so I think have to process these things on on difficult levels and no my moment is my Abraham and Isaac moment you know that control is an illusion. You have absolutely no control here and remember wrestling with God.

You know what he was asking me, do you believe that I love.

Charlie is much as you do and if I chose to take him home which he still think and I think in life we have like a reeling Lord we would go to Africa and surfing with administrative rights support will do whatever I think if we're honest with ourselves. We all have an untouchable list. You can do anything else will go anywhere you want us to get not my child, not my marriage not my grandchild and so I think there are things that felt like God was just in my fingers lease at the things that were heaviest on my heart are heavy on his team. He cares about the same things we do. Sometimes the things that we grip the tightest are the very places he wants to get in there and work if we will just give them access and so on. We know God doesn't love us or our child. More than that child across the hall. His story was done and differently and so we had to get to the point, you know, like the Lord. If Charlie got to go be with Jesus. That's great for him something up. I would never get over is a mom has to trust that you are good and you are you have a plan. We were all in Little Rock praying for you guys and hearing reports will try this now that didn't work. This work and this was kind of the not try this was to breakthrough medically. What they do. There was some resident in Cincinnati who had read a study about something in China and had never been done before and there wasn't any new he would and under every Monday and Thursday. If it drains directly into his liver and would inject myosin into his liver set it off for several hours and let it out at the end of the day and so he was put under anesthesia two times a week for couple weeks and his fever finally broke. It was like the first time in like 60 days there's been no fever, and so it was, it worked but she is now in medical journals whose story you think my send the cocktails they were getting in his PICC line or touching any liver damage, any issues there is a small scar from where the tubes were placed that's his new normal, but his liver is functioning normally. Now Vegas for him systems taken a hit. We have to work to get back up and he had stepped right this year and giving antibiotics.

It really doesn't touch.

I think he's none to seminars and take a while for those things to work again. Please think you're funny to wash his hands level as you think about what you been through your health issues. Charlie health issues and the mission that God has called you to to effectively develop godly marriages and families to change. No one home at the time. How has what you've gone through affected your thinking about the mission that were part of me.

I think it family is the Trojan horse. I was recently with a group of women and went around as our our last day together with what is your prayer request is got to show my heart. How can I pray for you every single person in the room. It was here's what's going on in our marriage. This is where I am with my children was all prayer request about the family and so there is a tender spot in the heart of every human who wants their family to go well and so because of that, you know, once life is poorly people are willing to hear about God and Jesus in ways that when life is perfect. They're not that we know that intimately like it's a sacred spot to be in the long with families through hard things and really, life is not about the good things are the bad things that happen to you, but what do you do with others and we we quickly realize that our lives are not our own, and there's always an army watching you remember when Charlie was sick, especially since we had all of our international staff and from all the different countries and I'm reading all the prayer request to him and we had the blog I looked at it this morning. It was like 55 countries. Following his story like that.Ian like he realized it, you have the opportunity to show life is going great so be when life is poorly and you handle it differently than everyone else. I think that's when people are like tell me about this Jesus, how how can you become when life is chaotic. John Piper said if you're pregnant next-door neighbor something good happens families as well. I was lucky, and in the fact that something would happen if you use I will praise the Lord that doesn't cause your next-door neighbor to go know more about Jesus, but when you go through trials and you say bless the Lord your next-door neighbor does not need you need to explain that to me) is, take away fall for me this weekend that it me last night that the characteristic of God does not change the circumstances and how that provide a just peace and point people do not know him.

When they are in the valleys where we been listening to a conversation I had not long ago with Chris and Mary Herndon speakers that are weak and remember marriage get away. Part of the staff. The team heard family life sure about the journey that they been on and we've said so many times. Matthew chapter 7 says if your house is built on sand. When the storms come you're really in trouble. Big great crash, but if you are working today in the column to build your marriage to build your family on the rock. When the storms, and they will come your house can stamp it is really difficult to build a foundation in the storm, you do it before the storm.

Knowing their coming and we've seen Chris and Mary story and there storm reconciled because they had a foundation I Jesus I love how Chris tended to because he talked about how God's faithfulness never changes.

He's always there with us for us fighting for us sometimes it doesn't feel like it that he's always there circumstances or to change God's character won't change and that's our anchor. That's our rock in the midst of the storm. Chris and Mary shared the story as a part of the new devotional that family life is put together a 52 week devotional for couples. There's one devotion each week for 52 weeks and these are devotions that are written by couples who speak at our weekend to remember marriage getaways. Some of our family life, staff and team the devotional is called the story of us. You got a devotional or two in there about one. This is just a great tool for couples to continue to direct their marriage toward God by once a week reading the devotional together praying together as a couple, and we'd love for you to get a copy of the story of us couples devotional go to family life today.com to order, or call one 800 FL today to order your copy of this devotional again.

It's called the story of us. You can order online@familylifetoday.com or call 1-800-358-6329 one 800,000 family L as in like them in the word today to get a copy of the story of us couples devotional and you've heard her say this before, but the time to build strength in your marriage is not when the storm hits its before the storm hits you build the foundation when things are going well. So to to be in a devotional like this once a week throughout the year.

That's part of how you build a foundation or maybe get the video series. We talked about this week. This is how you build a foundation so that when the storms come. Your marriage can stand strong in those storms again go to family life today.com for more information about the devotional. The story of us or about the vertical marriage video series featuring Dave and Ann Wilson.

The five sessions that are available on vertical marriage website again as family life today.com or call if you're ready to order these resources.

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Working to hear a remarkable story of a young woman whose life got derailed early in her life as a teenager and how God ultimately rescued her from traffic, powerful, compelling story. Tomorrow I want to thank our engineer today. Keith Lynch along with our entire broadcast on behalf of our hosts Dave and animals about the pain see that next time for another edition of family life, family life today is a production of family life of Little Rock, Arkansas crew ministry help for today hope for tomorrow