Creating a Relational Legacy, Part 2

Some relationships are limited to a particular reason or season, so you have to learn all relationships are common, at least in the way you related to them.

You might know them the rest of your life. But some people play a certain role at a certain season and there in July for certain reason and you gotta discern that and learn how to work through that. How do you know when a key relationship is supposed to come to an end. Find out next on today's destined for victory with pastor Paul Sheppard hello and thanks for stopping by today pastor Paul and his wife Meredith remind us that sometimes relationships are only designed for specific reason and for specific season.

There are times when you see relationships and wasn't necessarily God's will. Sometimes it is the key is knowing how to discern which is which. Today's message is straight ahead, stay right here or visit pastor Paul.net to listen to destined for victory on demand. You can also download the podcast to Google or wherever you enjoy your podcasts now here are pastor Paul and his wife Meredith would today's destined for victory message creating a relational legacy. Now let's go back to our fee versus Hollywood you read the two theme verses from Psalm 90 verses 10 and 12 I 70 years by reason of strength and both only labor and some RL framing soon cut off and we fly away so he chat to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. A man and so we're continuing talking about how to create a relational legacy because were keeping the end in mind. This is all about getting ready for the inevitable. One day you and I are going to check out a year and Vogel say stuff about you and I'm trying to help you make sure what they say about you. So when looking at how the impact key relationships and I talked about five categories that I want you to think through as we are processing this. The first is your key family members both family members that you deal with on a regular basis both in your immediate family and even distant relatives. If you have regular dealings with them number to your key friends and acquaintances, and not all of us have friends because a friend loves at at all times and friends are certain type of person but a lot of us have acquaintances that we do interact with regularly. I want to help you with that relational legacy number three your mentors or advisors. I want to help make sure that you're dealing correctly and some of you need to invest in letting people be intentional about mental review and advising you some of us. Your problem is you too smart for your own good and what I mean by that is you. Not as smart as you think you are and you really do need the wisdom that some other folk are going to bring into your life if you allow that number for little note then David sometimes we we know we fly mentor, but what we really need is a friend and sometimes parents a breakdown in the relationship only trying to make a mentor, a friend that's good stuff, so make sure you know what it is you're trying to get and don't try to take a mentor and make him your best friend. They might have other people to admit.

So anyway number for your key associates and teammate. Some of us, all of us need teammates and Associates samples get done what we have to do in life and so you want to make sure those relationships stay sharp and it finally got to have mentees and apprentices.

People who are learning from you growing because of your influence in their life. So those are five key areas that you want to make sure your relationships are strong. Now we already covered some ground. I can't repeat. We talked about Matthew 18. Some of us have to learn how to work through conflict talk a little bit more about that today, but you gotta make sure conflict is just part of relationships. Quit getting upset and surprised when a relationship with a person who loves you and you love those sour sometimes that happens but sour doesn't mean permanent disconnection we gotta learn how to resolve conflict so that we can move forward. But here today what we want to continue this by talking about are few things here's one. Some relationships are limited to a particular reason or season, and so you have to learn not all relationships are permanent, at least in the way you related to them. You might know them the rest of your life. But some people play a certain role at a certain season and never in your life for certain reason and you gotta discern that and learn how to work through that.

So we were going to do is bring up a couple of biblical examples. One is in Genesis 21 verses nine through 13.

Here's what it says and seller. Saul the son of Hagar, the Egyptian, whom she had borne to Abraham's golfing. You'll remember that when Isaac being weaned, which means he's a product in Bible times are probably many is right around two years old he's being weaned, and his older brother Abraham had with Hagar is now a teenager and the teenagers looking over at the little boy and he's golfing and making fun and Sarah who is Isaac's mama had the baby had 90 years old, which means she's a mom and grandma and great grand mom all wrapped up in one. She had the baby. As you see this other woman's teenager market. Since this couple don't know what that was like. And look at what the Scripture says here. Therefore, verse 10 of Genesis 21 therefore she said Abraham cast out this bondwoman went and her son for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son Isaac, and the matter was very displeasing and Abraham site because of his son watch this were talking about relationships that don't always stay the same. Verse 12. God himself said Abraham. Do not let it be this pleasing in your sight because of the land or because of your bondwoman and all the married women have this underlined in their Bibles whatever seller has said to you. Listen to her voice for Isaac your seed shall be called, and then God tells them because he knows he is distressed about his oldest son, yet I will also make a nation out of the bondwoman son because he is your seed but look a bit glacé and put out, put a baby out with that relationship as it has been done. Every now and in a relationship is done and when it's done. You have to realize God himself says if you do it my way. Sometimes you will have to dismiss someone from your inner circle, even though they were in there for a while when the season is up, and you begin to see the signs of it. That's when you have to be willing to say Lord I will give this person that you because at the end of the day, we can ensure each other's future sometimes had to put somebody in the Lord's hands is what the Lord told Abraham given me, take care you sound aware about it but he got to leave this house, so God said an effect on the way going, but you don't have to get up you want to say something more about that because I know you can relate to the Sarah and Hagar part of it just says the Lord would be important to learn the leave I see things, to relationship, and it took me a very long time to learn how, as a Christian, everyone who came into my life was supposed to stay in my life and it was my job. Good Christian to keep them in my life and so I went through a lot of undue and unnecessary conflict internally, not with people back internally trying to hold onto something, trying to mandate quote unquote Christian life and keep people in my life that their season was simply so I would encourage you as you well and make sure and listen to the word that you look at relationships in light of Scripture and see that it is okay when people grow up high, but we keep our unity in our fellowship in Christ. Some people are no longer very close range that they will always be my brother and sister in Christ. That's good so sometimes we have to realize that when a person can't play the role they used to play you still wish them well and there's something you can do practically Abraham sent them away would provisions, but he had to send them away and let him go and he couldn't be running down behind me just see how they doing that was in this place. He had to give him to the Lord your some people that you gotta get to the Lord and when you do, he will take care of them. Now let's go to another case them as my wife to lead on this one chapter 1 verse 14 you'll remember the story of a man named Melinda let with his wife Naomi and their two sons left Bethlehem during a famine and went down clear down to another place Moab where they lived for years during the famine in Bethlehem among God's people course.

Moab did not among God's people, but they went down there only to you Sam.

I wonder if that was God's will know more about it.

Sometimes you gotta realize that Romans 828 is always an effect even if God himself and on the go. He knows how to work all things together for good. So we went down the Moab, but all three men. The data limit leg and his two sons died. The signs had married down in Moab now these girls are widows and they only the matriarch is a window grabbed my wife read verse 14 and talk you through that okay start of the sound Ruth chapter 1 beginning verse 83 214 Naomi said to Hank to daughters-in-law go return each to her mother's house, the Lord deal kindly with you.

If you have doubt that dad and with me. The Lord grant that you may find rest, each in the house of her husband so she can't stand again lifted up their voices and wept, and they said to Hank surely he will return with you to your people, but Naomi said turned back my daughters. Why would you go with me. I dare still sons in my womb, that they may be a has-beens turn back my daughters go I am too old to have a has been. If I should say I hope if I should have a has been tonight and should also bear signs would you wait for them until they were grown which you restrain yourself from having has-beens now my daughters, for it grieves me very much for your sakes, that the hand of the Lord has gone out against me, and verse 14 says that they let their voices and wept and kissed her mother-in-law that Ruth climbed coming up next. The rest of today's message creating a relational legacy with pastor Paul Sheppard and his wife Meredith. If you've never stop by our website pastor Paul.net. I invite you to do so today, you'll find all of Pastor Paul's recent messages on demand plus a host of great resources or online store, including books and DVD messages from Pastor Paul learn about the ministry about all the great things friends like you are doing for your prayers and financial support.

It's all that pastor Paul.net and if you love listening to this program, we know you'll enjoy watching selected video clips by subscribing to pastor Paul on YouTube for more details and links to all of his social media visit pastor Paul.net. The book of Ruth gives us a great example of what healthy relationships look like one daughter-in-law chose to stay with Naomi the other did not hear more about historian can help you in your own relationships in the rest of today's message creating a relational legacy. Once again, your pastor Paul and his wife. This story this story has ministered so much to me because it shows a godly example and of a relationship hiding of the ways that it is very gracious. Goodbye and Naomi says to her daughters-in-law and that is walking away the Lord deal kindly with you as you have doubt with the gag meeting hi has been at her signs and with me. The Lord grant that you may find rest each in the house of her has been so she can't stand it up their voices and wept. Why I like this is because I will walk away you know the Naomi Roland Harnack now you don't hear of her bad mouthing work by you know I gave you my son and I am walking away from me. It reminds me so much of the movie actually it was the movie mommy dearest and when I'm Joan Crawford and one of her boyfriends were breaking up. She's begging him to stay.

The bottom line is he just said I will always speak well of you that in my journal that night because I realize that you don't have to part ways in an ugly way.

Naomi, she uttered a benediction. She laughed as she ran she prayed over her. There was a kid.

In exchange, she didn't cut ties and cut her out of her high.

She kissed her and they went together they look that up their voices and she gave a blessed benediction.

We can have the same kind of maturity and attitude when we part ways with people that we live us good stuff. Now notice the wisdom of Naomi. She said when when the girls first wanted to go with her. She said wait a minute. I know we been together these years. As you been married to my sons, but this is a new season where I'm going I'm going back to what for me is hold that places not hold for y'all. Y'all have never been the Bethlehem you are not of Israel. And so it's not hold for you. Why would you follow me to what will be a foreign place for you and then look at our wisdom. She said even if I word miraculously to get married and await have to Moab all the way to become the first cougars makes no sense left to let the ladies come in later. Right now y'all need to just stay put, says you got a point. You have to be okay with the people recognize and agree I can't go with you into your future.

Some people walk which you find in your past and present, but if the time comes when God is sending you in a certain direction and they don't. You gotta let him go and give them the same benediction that Naomi was willing to give or have you ever tried to drag somebody into your hooch or who had no business going with you. There. If you have you already know you could preach this part of the sermon, but the fact is, some people are there for a reason, or for season and when that seasons up when the reasons for Phil wish him well. Say hey God be with you and M go somewhere y'all don't have the gift of goodbye, but after service. I'll be right here sitting in my ability services nonstop pulling my chair like there's some still distant and I'm grateful if you need the gift of goodbye, I will just touch out this way that you and and the anointing of goodbye will hit you. I have learned that some of the best words you can get used to our good by. See you later then some good words y'all call some people just don't belong anymore. Sometime you see it in their face in attitude you hear it in the words of somebody who's physically there, but they're not there then none is over you like that anymore. So we all had a bad breakup quit letting them be bad if you gotta go to gotta go.

I know I got shoulders were saying about all them shoulders everything you belong at the why you will get on your nerves and your little one with him on impact. Let me get back to the word quickly. Sometimes when the season is over.

Most people don't just disappear walk away with never any explanation with never a farewell to be formal and Naomi and her daughters-in-law.

It just where you don't have to visit pain and discomfort.

And you know it makes people go through changes when you said we just disappear from their lives with no explanation at all and it may not feel good to say you know we get going into different directions. I love you but you know I'm just moving on to cite these women.

Naomi was going back to Bethlehem and or upon stayed in my lap so I like to say as believers we are supposed to love one another and to treatment another well so my word here is don't those people don't just disappear out of their lives without saying anything and causing them told under what happened. What went wrong.

Never answer, then I don't know about you, and experience that with people just just hearing you work in relationship with them and I call. I've made phone calls sent Leonard into the house, not open the door is a horrible testimony and one of the things that we sat in the very beginning when I pastor Paul was talking about this series keeping the end in mind. I share this scripture last week from Proverbs 10 in verse seven, the memory of the righteous, but the name of the wicked will rot and we want to leave good legacy even in our relationship. We may have had conflict, we may have had a season come to an end, but we don't have to walk out of each other's lives in an ugly way we can bless one another by doing it God's way is another key point. Try to help you create your relational legacy. There are some relationships where conflict has created a significant problem. However, choosing to throw the person away is usually not God's will say that again there are some relationships where conflict is greatest a significant problem. However, throwing the person away is usually not usually when we're throwing folks away. It's out of our flesh feeling and it's not necessarily what God would have.

Thanks so much for being here for two days destined for victory with pastor Paul Sheppard and Meredith Sheppard to hear any recent message on demand, including today's teaching, creating a relational legacy visit pastor Paul.net that's pastor Paul.net's a great site to find out more about destined for victory.

You'll find resources or online store there or you can make a safe and secure donation in appreciation of your generous gift today. Pastor Paul will send you a booklet that goes hand-in-hand with the message or hearing. Creating a relational legacy pastor Paul America spent three days talking about what God says about how we can improve and strengthen our personal relationships. That's the message you heard today and will continue to hear all this week.

Will this booklet highlights the major themes of that message.

It's called creating a relational legacy. It is our gift to you this month by request for your generous gift to Destin for victory. So, call 855-339-5500 or visit pastor Paul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destin for victory PO Box 1767, Fremont, CA 94538.

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The destined for victory ministry team would like to join you in prayer from the homepage of pastor Paul.net use the contact us feature to let us know how we can pray for you while you're there we should ask for pastor Paul's monthly letter of encouragement. Yours, at no cost or obligation to create a strong and God honoring relational legacy.

You must always put people before prosperity property and personal say that again to create a strong and God honoring relational legacy you must always put people before prosperity property and personal ambition. That's tomorrow with pastor Paul Sheppard and his wife Meredith share their message creating a relational legacy. Until then, remember he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory