For Want of a Mom and Dad

Pastor author and Bible teacher Alan Wright resistance to temptation does not come by great willpower, but by extraordinary self-worth. Make sure you know how to get our special source right now could be yours for your donation this month to Helen right ministries as you listen to today's message go deeper as we send you today's special offer.

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More on that later in the program. Now let's get started with today's teaching here Alan Wright when you become a Christian Bible says that you have been adopted as a son or daughter. What that means is that that you you not only are no longer an orphan, but you belong to God forever and even more than that. It means that you have been made in air and even more than that the Scriptures is a co-air with Christ himself and so much of spiritual growth is coming to believe it coming to accept it coming to have ears to hear the amazing promises of God, for the Lord is speaking to us just like we were trying to speak to Sasha and say no you don't need clutch onto everything you don't need to be be fearful of other people. You don't need to become self absorbed. You can be open, you can be free. I'm going to take care of you. We had some dear parishioners in a church I served previously that had a ministry in the orphanages and what they would do Jenny and Ernie Rucker they would go into the orphanage in the way that the Lord had shown them to help these orphans open up and talk to them was a go in and asked the orphans to write poetry, they just give them blank paper and pencil as I write a poem and is it is done at Orion.

It doesn't have to be. You just had to be you just express yourself through through a poem, it's like a piece of art and so they would gather these poems and they were beautiful and they put them into little books of poems from the orphans, and one that struck me as much, as any was a little boy and he wrote a poem he called it the want of a mom and dad.

He said moms and dads are wonderful for those people that has a mom and a dad parents that guide and teach you the right way, not the wrong way. As for me I never knew my mom, my dad drunk all the time.

I don't know what it's like to have a mom and dad and dad to wrestle and play with mom to tell me everything is okay when something is wrong. Parents really care for me once it will help me not abuse me. I wish I had a mom and dad, why can I have a mom and dad like all the other kids that could be one of shame's primary mottos, like all the other kids. We need a mom and a dad.

We need a mom and a data and I don't care what the spirit of the age seems to be saying now. God made a design that were male and female, and it is through a man a woman come together in marriage. God designed all of society to be ordered, and a child is designed for a mom and a dad and when you don't have both a mom and dad.

There's something that's missing is I've shared with you.

I was in fourth grade when my dad left home. I never see my dad cry. Up until that time and he just said. That's not to be living at home anymore and he said I feel like I failed. I'm sorry there was no other explanation.

Nobody ever suggested to me Alan, it's your fault. Nobody said that they think they did, but to the child's mind it's impossible not to have the thought. What's wrong with me. What he wouldn't leave her there were some wrong with me. This is how the process of shame-based thinking begins, so we now have it where in our culture in America that about 50% of people will have at some point lived in a single-parent home.

What I'm saying is that the reality is that this leaves a wound and part of God's design is is violated, and this is at the point blame at any of our parents. This isn't that this is about finger-pointing and this isn't about saying that children that that have single parents that the gods not to be able to to bless them mightily and blessed, but it is to say that we need to be honest about about the wound is there see mom and dad in mind as a different route is different physically. We are souls are different meant male and female circumference and and and without without risking what I don't risk the overgeneralization of of what the different genders are all about, but we could say this that mothers are so nurturing and and and this is proven by the fact that the child in our family when our children were little. I felt like I was a very nurturing dad.

I was very I was very affectionate – but when they get boot on their knee, they run into their run right past me every time. Where's mommy what is it about mommy mommy's nurturing mommy's got some kind of nurturing love to to show some kind of acceptances there and and that nurture is so so so important because it it it it is in the place where you are loved unconditionally. That's the place where you learn to trust love this Psalm 22 verse nine, you brought me safely for my mother's womb and led me to trust you at my mother's breast. There is something that happens when you come into the pros a little baby and you can't do anything for anybody you're cute, you're just helpless all you do is cry and wet your diaper and yet and yet your you got a mother is feeding you and holding you and loving you. I think part of what the psalmist is saying is that when you are loved. Despite the fact that you have an earned it.

That's where you learn to trust.

That's where you begin to say.

Maybe I could trust.

Maybe, maybe not everybody is out to get me.

Maybe I don't have to just be all on my own trust is born in the in the womb of real nurture and unconditional love. But we also grow up were not supposed to just stay forever.

Just in the place of just being nurtured we are nurtured so we learn to trust so that we can move on also and make a difference in life is so interesting that Paul in first Thessalonians chapter 2 within a matter of just a few short verses he mentions how they were like a mother and like a father.

We were gentle among you, like a mother caring for little children and we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God we said we were like a mother cares for you, but were also like a father who encourages, who comforts who urges you onward is one of the things that happens is that when you experience a mom and a dad, literally and/or spiritually, you experience both the nurture that assures you. You can trust but also you have a voice that's calling you up into destiny and we need both and without both with an orphan mentality we are going to be in one way or another we are going to be lacking trust and lacking confidence of what we can do in the world.

So what shame does is shame leaves us with an inward lack of confidence an inward sense that because I'm flawed. I can't totally trust others and there's a limit to how God could use me in the world and what what grace dies in the picture you get of this when you have the father's favor upon your life is that it changes everything about how you perceive yourself enables you to endure adversity except honors forgive others and live a life of grace towards others.

Nobody and the Scripture typifies this more beautifully than Joseph Allen Wright will have more teaching moment from today's important series something is holding you back to imprints and could change everything. Is there someone you referencing step missing need a timeless power on the faith filled vision spoken over I will never rise to our God shall afford confidently under the favor of fees, I turned to face every curse and blessing in your life and empower the people you have contact us today. Pastor Alan Wright snooper the power to Blacks we have are very special when you make a gift of $40 and more talent write ministries send you two copies of the beautiful had had a for you and one for you to share as a gift and expression of our gratitude for your generous gift will also include a DVD to important teachings with additional content. Pastor Alan, your gifts only against this ministry possible. So please partner with us to help us reach thousands of people every day.

The gospel and the grace of Jesus Christ. And when you do, you'll become empowered to change the world power year draws to a close this final month of the year partnership, seven 877-544-4861 come to our website. Pastor Alan.org blessing your life discovering God's grace filled vision for your rights reading your heart with grace and encouragement. Allen writes a daily blessing. It's free.

Just a click away. Pastor Alan got away these teaching now can you once again is Allen writing. No Joseph just such a remarkable story that prefigures Christ in so many ways. We don't have time obsolete. All the stories, maybe many of you are familiar with it. If you're unfamiliar with the story of Joseph. He is the favored son of Jacob because he was born to Jacobs truelove, Rachel, and the story picks up in Genesis chapter 37 and at verse two we read in Genesis 37 to Joseph being 17 years old was pastoring the flock with his brothers.

He was a boy with the sons of Bill Hinesville pause father's wives and Joseph brought a bad report of them to their father. Now Israel. That's Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his sons because he was the son of his old age, and he made him a robe of many colors, but when his brother Saul that their father loved him more than all his brothers, they hated him and they could not speak peacefully to him and Joseph had a dream, and we told it to his brothers. They hated him even more. This is a story about this this younger of the brothers Joseph who is the apple of his father's eye and the other brothers are so envious of the father's favor upon Joseph and what happens throughout Genesis chapter 37 is that they hated him at at verse four winces they hated him all the more, they couldn't speak a kind word to him. You're getting and anatomy of shame see the brothers are ashamed that they are inwardly feeling condemned because they don't feel there father's love. Look at the contrast look at those that have a father's love and those and and Joseph Joseph as his father's love and the brothers who don't and you begin to see the anatomy ashamed they hated him the can speak a kind word to him after the multicolored coat. The text in verse five they hated him all the more you get to verse 23 and now you see that they conspired against him. In verse 23, Joseph came to his brothers. They stripped him of his robe. The robe of many colors that he wore. They try to strip away the symbol of favor on his life.

Shame will always try and some way or another to remove them somewhere else there there favor on them with the idea that then I can feel better about myself and then they take him in verse 24 they throw him down. There's a picture. Shame trying to bring another one down you always understand this is some I try to bring you down is because they already feel low and want to bring you to their level. Literally what their literature is throwing them down into a pit and then they sell him at verse 27, 28, they sell and as a slave. Some people that are happening by on the way to Egypt. So now you see the whole cycle of shame.

They ostracize them.

They hate him.

They conspired against him.

They they then they then are art are stripping him of the symbols of his favorite throwing him down bringing a blower and finally they treated like a thing.

Shame when it reaches its ultimate it looks upon other people not as people, but his things to be used. Solomon slavery they let their dad believe that Joseph is dead.

They let their dad grieve and this is far as I understand that Joseph is gone forever, but the remarkable story grows. From there, because Joseph is taken in Egypt and there's favor on his life and even though he's a slave in Potiphar's household. He has a deep sense of the favor that's in his life. A dream that's in his heart and his father's love.

And there are three moments in his life that are absolutely remarkable in Joseph like that. I just absolutely marvelous in the first one is in Genesis chapter 39. Take time to turn to these text. You can look them up later and read and think about the story of Joseph, but in this moment Potiphar's wife tries to seduce a lower Joseph. If anybody of any man could have rationalized and just said to himself, I might as well indulge in this been sold as a slave. I've got no future. I might as well just have a momentary pleasures of the flesh. If anybody could rationalize it would been Joseph but instead Joseph resist the temptation runs away from Potiphar's wife and what he says there is. He says no one. This is in Genesis 39 versus eight noises. No one is greater in this house that I how can I do such a thing.

You see what he saying he is saying God is put me in a position of favor is a slave, even how can I knowing what God's done for me. How can I do such a thing and sin against my master.

It's amazing, but is a slave and he saying I have too much self worth to fall into the sin right now and here's here's the lesson from this that great resistance to temptation does not come by great willpower, but by extraordinary self-worth. When people think that we need shame in order to resist sin.

What they're missing is that it is actually the inward shame and condemnation that makes is likely to give in to temptation. But when we are affirmed with it and Joseph was so affirmed that when the moment of temptation came, he was able to resist. I'm also I'm also amazed that he was able in another moment to accept a great honor is what happens is Potiphar's wife accuses Joseph falsely they put Joseph in prison and now he's only been a slave is only been forgotten by his family but is been at his ease incarcerated terrible conditions he's imprisoned seemingly forgotten and and yet there comes a moment were because of his capacity to interpret dreams and Pharaoh hears about it.

Pharaoh brings them to interpret a dream that Pharaoh's head and when Joseph gives this this heaven sent interpretation of the dream Pharaoh is so taken by that, remarkably, in Genesis 4141 Pharaoh says I hereby put you in charge of the whole land of Egypt, and what is amazing to me is that Joseph could go from the prison to the pinnacle of leadership without hesitation.

Can you imagine having that sense of inward affirmation where it went. In one moment you been beaten and abused and accused and and everybody in the world's try to make you feel like you're worthless and the next moment you're offered the highest position in the land and something in him said sure I can do that.

I have a hard time just accepting some of the little honors in my life because of the party goes on and off like an' whales could probably do this better fetuses. Yes, sign me up God wants for us to have so much inward security that when the time comes. To be promoted or used in some special way. We say yes type always that I've learned to be content in all circumstances. There many moments there's a there's another moment though. That is incredible in his life.

Of course, and that is there is a reunion that eventually takes place between Joseph and his brothers. They come in they don't know it forces Joseph.

Joseph has the right to exterminate them. He has the right to prison, then he is a right he is the leader of Egypt, second only to Pharaoh and his brothers come and finally, he reveals he says it it is I it is Joseph your brother whom you through into slavery and the brothers are so afraid of course there Frank and you get to Genesis and chapter 50 and you hear the words of sweet grace from Joseph. Don't be afraid. I'll provide for you and I'll provide for your children because only the person who has known Grace can show grace and all through all those adversities, the son who had the father's favor was able to resist temptation was able to accept honor and was able to be gracious with those who would hurt him the most about father's favor and knowing it and knowing that you are adopted, the gospel is about favored son is about a son in whom the father said I am well pleased. It is about a son who had no intent to harm anyone, and only loved and he lived as one who was loved, and yet some hated him and falsely accused him and punished him and he in the end had more than enough power to call down a legion of angels to eliminate everyone that wanted to crucify him, but instead he said, father forgive them.

How could Jesus do this he could do this because he was the son of the father. How much more that your heavenly father want you to know that you're his son, his daughter and heir air. Jesus Christ Alan Wright in today's teaching for want of a mom and dad in our series for yourself. Be yourself sick with his pastor Alan is back with a parting good news thought for today's teaching just a moment something is holding you back if you could change everything. Is there someone you referencing step missing me the timeless power on the faith vision spoken over I will never rise to our God shall pass forward confidently under the favor of fees, I turned to every curse and blessing in your old life and empower the people you have contact us today pastor Alan Wright snooper the power to Blacks. We have a very special gift of $40 and mortality my ministries listening to copies of the beautiful had had a one for you and one for you to share his expression of our gratitude for your generous gift will also include a DVD to important teachings with additional content pastor Alan your gifts only against this ministry possible. So please partner with us to help us reach thousands of people every day gospel and the grace of Jesus Christ. And when you do, you'll become empowered to change the world power year draws to a close this final month of the year partnership for this call us at 877-544-4860 come to our website pastor Alan.org blessing your life discovering God's grace filled vision for your signing rights reading the rest your heart with grace and encouragement.

Alan writes a daily blessing. It's free.

Just a click away. Pastor Alan got away right now with pastor and how and in a this is what we talked about the where the home, but really the most of his childhood comes back into play in this topic is a little misleading. The statistics that sometimes people say most marriages end in divorce.

That's not true, but it is true that the majority of people will at some point in their life live and a home that has experience brokenness in the marriage so it's touched many many many of our listeners right now and I want to leave you with the thought that the great astonishing truth that John in his old age, wrote a little epistle. How great is the love of the father has lavished on us that we should be called children of God. Your identity is not a broken one. Your identity is not even year from a broken family.

Your identity is in Christ, you are a child of God is your father and your his adopted and a co-heir with Christ himself. That's who you really are.

That's how you can be healed from the shame of brokenness of the past. Today's good news message is a listener supported production Alan White ministries