Total Togetherness | Part 1

Men and women are equal in worth before God with the been designed with divine differences about what I want to learn is different from a man merely physically, she is psychologically and emotionally different, and God made her different all-purpose and if you try to make her just like you are. You think that you had given her exactly what you would like to make a mistake.

God made her before and you will learn to just about your head up a big problem worth finding the profound truth of the gospel.

Simply stated, the messages Adrian Rogers last week would be in a series called superglue for the family, offering insights and lessons on how to turn our homes into little colonies of heaven.

God's plan for marriage is for man and woman become one flesh totally together as one in order to be this intimate men and women must have constant healthy communication. If you have your Bible turn to first Peter chapter 3 and will begin in verse seven as Adrian Rogers shares four steps we can take in our marriages toward total togetherness. How in God's holy word play center in first Peter chapter 3 have a moment when you began reading in verse seven where talking today about husbands and wives, and the relationship of husbands and wives of the title of the message is total togetherness. That is how to achieve intimacy and marriage to find out that the Scripture is addressed today primarily to the house because I believe it is the wives who desire intimacy more than the man and we men sometimes are so pardon me, fellows, stupid. We don't understand the needs of the life and really our own deepest needs God's plan for marriage is that man and woman become one. That means total intimacy is not merely talking about physical union but it is talking about intellectual psychological, emotional as well as physical dwelling together as husband and wife. Total togetherness. All right, let's see what God's word has to say about how to achieve that unity and marriage. I began reading here in verse seven. Likewise you husbands that he's already spoken to the wives and begins to speak to the husbands and he says likewise he husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife. As unto the weaker vessel and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers be not hindered.

Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one another love his brethren, be pitiful, be courteous not rendering evil for evil or railing for railing, but contrariwise blessing knowing that ye are thereunto called AG should inherit a blessing.

I go back to verse seven and look at that word well. Husbands well within the word well in the Greek language literally means to house together to live together in the same house account from two Greek words which mean house and we are to live with in the same house that is intimacy literally means letting somebody else in two your life this matter intimacy as I've said is more than physical. It involves the total person. It primarily involves this matter of communication. Husbands and wives, as we already said at such a difficulty communicating one woman winter lawyer and said my husband wants to see me lawyer says. Does he have any grounds or. She said he has about 20 acres on I said I don't mean that sin does he have a great sidedness. She said what he said a garage. She said nobody has a carport he said say what is your problem anyway.

She said he says we can communicate. I understand why communication there.

Fran is right in the center of this thing called intimacy and is all kinds of communication we need to communicate emotionally to tell the other person how we feel we need to communicate intellectually to tell the other person how we think we need to communicate socially to tell the other person what we like to do.

We need to communicate physically as a matter fact in and marriage when husband and wife come together physically. The Bible uses this terminology that thus in such a person knew his wife and that strange to talk about the physical act of marriages knowing someone, but sex is a form of communication that says I love you this way saying I love you, they cannot be put into words. It is total intimacy.

Now, dear friend marriage comes to its fullness is happiest is most wonderful state when we achieve total total togetherness, total intimacy and marriage. I see in our passage before us for things for status total intimacy total togetherness and marriage, and the very first of these is what I want to call phones. Now the Bible says here husbands, dwell with your wives according to knowledge that is well with your wives thoughtfully according to knowledge. Actually, we could translate this way live together in the same house with good sense literally lived together.

So go the same house with good sense according to knowledge. So many husbands are so stupid.

One man watch the football game on Friday night watch two football games on Saturday to own Sunday. His wife said to him, I think you love football more than you love me, he said yes but you had a basketball is living dangerously center on according to knowledge learned something about a wife. What is it mean to live with a car, according to knowledge, you get a new automobile. What you do you read the manual is a lie, while it takes what kind of deal.

It takes what the air pressure in the tires is going to be you watch the gauges and the gauges indicate the needs of that car I was driving my automobile. Another gauge came on. That said, check the oil pressure. I immediately went into a service station and said, would you check the oil pressure because the gate said this car has a need and why will that car to serve me I have to pay attention to the needs of that car and God's word is the manual and wife is constantly sending signals, but many of us know, read the manual and we pay no attention to the signals we pay more attention to automobiles. Many of the men do and they do to their own why they do not live with her wife.

According to knowledge. Now Jim and I want to learn that a woman is different from a man other than merely physically different.

She is psychologically and emotionally different, and God made her different all-purpose she is designed differently by her manufacturer. God made her different from you and if you try to make her just like you are. You think that you had given her exactly what you would like to make big mistake friend she is different. She's equal to you, but different. We need to learn that equality is not sameness God made her different and if you learn to adjust to that your head up big trouble. I heard some ships that were out of maneuver and the maneuvering at night and working to the captain said Capt. ahead of us. There is a large mass. He said will send them a message as to what you wish.

Tell them he said you tell them to alter their course 10° to the north and they sent out the message alter your course 10° to the north. The message came back and said you alter your course 10° to the south. The captain said send this message on the captain, I said all. Your course 10° to the north message came back, set on the same in first place you alter your course 10° to the south. The captain was a reset ship alter their course 10° to the north message came back and said I am a lighthouse you order your course 10° to the south friend list the man that doesn't learn to adjust his head for collegian in this matter. I mean there's some things you can change your why these ways if she wanted you to. She couldn't change if she wanted to. This is the way that God has made her I would take. She's different dimension for five ways.

The woman is different from a man if you're going to live with your wife. According to knowledge, you're going to have to learn these ways that she is different and she's different by design. For example, God has designed the man to be the leader of the initiator and God has designed a woman to be responsible. Over and over again. The Bible says the husband is to be the head of life, that is, the head is what initiates they hate is what gives leadership.

The man is designed to lead the woman is designed to respond and therefore the man is to be the initiator taken out to get a price to mature.

We love him because he first loved us. John is the one through the Lord Jesus, who has initiated that love and correspondingly, God has made the mail to be the initiator and God has made the woman to be the responder. Now this doesn't mean of course that the man is the boss in the whole, but it does mean that he's the lead and most women have a sense of insecurity when the husband does not lean back the husband does not leave many times a woman will take over the leadership. But when she does take over the leadership she always thinks less of her husband and she always thinks less of her self. Mr. you leading in your home.

Are you leading. If you are leaving your failing and what we so many times called bossy wife is really just a failing husband God made man to be the initiator he made the woman to be the responsible second differs not only should men and women realize that they different in the fact that the man is to be the initiator.

The woman is to be the responder, but men and women think different men tend to think logically. Women tend to think emotionally away just a moment. Ladies, I'm not saying that the man's way of thinking is better. It is different.

I am certainly not saying that the man is smarter than the will, but they come at problems differently and a woman many times will leave with her emotion. She will tell you how she feels about a situation and the husband will say no, wait a minute, stop what you say line it out to me.

1234 when he says that she will begin to criticize him and say that he is harsh, that he is uncaring that he is insensitive he is unfeeling he is logically cool.

He will accuse her of being. If he's not careful, unreasonable, illogical, and if he gets mad enough you call her stupid which she is not. She just comes at the problem differently at those you need to understand that about the female psyche.

Joyce tells me Adrian Dole listen to what I say listen for what I mean. That's frustrating guys. It really is what you have to bow man won't object to solutions to problems, but a woman when she's faced with a problem. She'll think about the people within that problem and begin to care for them is not to say that men are not emotional and women are not logical. I'm talking about.

However, a basic instinct in the nature of human nature. Let me tell you again the difference between men and women.

Men tend to be doers and women tend to be beers know what I mean by that is that men are more goal oriented in life. Men see goals and they move, they reach out Dave Drive for goals.

There's sort of a conquests mentality in man that has to be that way because God's design is that the man be the breadwinner is designed for that. God said to Adam, of the sweat of your face. Are you going to earn your living.

He has to have goals. He has to be driven by those goals, but the woman has to have that meeting instinct and that homing instinct and that maternal instinct. So God has given to her by nature. This instinct to be. She's more interested in being a mother being a wife. She's more interested in relationships than he.

He is interested in immediate results. She is interested in long-term relationships that can cause problem because a man who is goal oriented when he reaches one goal he wants to go to another even in Marion. He courts is why he does everything he can do to get her to marry him and what she married Sam Batson.

That's what she is is why Jason Street got caught and so he just believes that Penny grows old but it becomes her whole life and why she's pouring more and more of her life into him.

He may be pouring less of his life in her after the courtship than he did the first rain, so we need to understand the psychological differences, take something out men tend to be inward thinkers. Women tend to be outward. Talk value doesn't mean again that women don't think admin can't talk. I certainly am not talking about who is the more intelligent but man don't like to talk as much as women do. Men just wait and you have this idea here of the silent mail and the talking bout fellows we need to open up and communicate and talk some more and girls don't talk so much what we need is more talking thinkers and more thinking talkers and we need to see that both of these natures have their weaknesses in both of them have their strengths now man because he is goal oriented looks for success but a woman because she is relationship oriented. She looks for security. Therefore think about how man sees his job as an extension of himself. I mean, the man can hardly separate himself from his job if he's failing this job. He has a great sense of lack of self were entities achieving in his job. He sees himself because he is goal oriented as being fulfilled and were something but the woman, the woman sees her home is an extension of herself, and therefore, if a man pays no attention to the whole. The woman is going to feel that the man is really rejecting her guys when we fail to fix the little things around the house. The leaking faucets we fail to do those things that she'd been asking to have done over and over again. It's not the leaking faucet is not the door that will close good. It really bothers her. It's a way that you have said to her I really don't care about your life and the things that pertain to you. You see the woman when her house is cluttered. Her life is cluttered when the problems at home she has problems at home with the man sees all and simply as a tool.

Sometimes a place to park a launching pad for him to go out and do these other thing we need to understand that while manner, success oriented women are security oriented. Nothing wrong with either one.

God put both together because we need go now husband needs to learn more about his wife and he learns about his automobile well with them. Number one, number one, thoughtfully. Okay according to knowledge. It literally means libido good sense number two well with her not only fully but well with her. Thankfully, thankfulness is the second key the total togetherness look at the Scripture. Likewise you husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor to the wife BC.

That means to give her honor it really means to express appreciation to your mate. That's it. To give honor means to set something aside is having great value. Somehow you have to get across to your wife that you value her that she is worth to you that she is attempting you that she is God's priceless gift and therefore you are going to grant her the respect due to her and position in her life, and you must give this honor. If you don't give it to our great place in her life is going to be avoided and how do you give your wife on whether several ways that you can give her honor.

Number one, you can look her right in the face right in the eyes and tell her how much you value her how much you appreciate her, and when you do when you tell her how much you value her and how much you appreciate her include those physical qualities.

Her attractiveness, her beauty, her charm, her grace, but go beyond those things. If that's all that you deal with should be threatened by because you see up there in the first part of this chapter, the Bible's tells women to have the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the side of God of great price and that meek and quiet spirit is not corruptible what God is saying is that the outward beauty is fading and failing, as it does in all of us and that outward frame is failing.

But when you praise your wife and when you honor your wife say darling. Thank you for your tenderness sweetheart thank you for your wisdom in dealing with the children darling, I appreciate your industry and taking care of the bookwork in our house are darling. I saw you the other day and thus and such a time. I was overwhelmed at your patient & current praise her and give her on her character traits let the children know that you honor her lecture children here. You praise their mother is one of the finest things you can possibly do. Her children praise her and her husband also rises up and gives her honor. Proverbs 31 says and you to do that in front of your children praise your wife before her friends never cut your wife down in public before her friends. It's humiliating. It's degrading. If you have a call to pick with her.

Certainly you can do it at home in a loving confrontation give her on her right let her know how much you value her how much you appreciate her.

How would you like To go out and hire somebody to do what your wife does. If she is a homemaker.

Do you think that you would just find a person offhandedly who could do these things to be a meal planner and nurse a counselor comforter, policeman, and the judge to settle disputes between the kids a wardrobe consultant of budget and financial planner a teacher or tutor a cheerleader, our spiritual advisor and nursery worker, seamstress, rococo made a gardener and administrator interior decorator and chauffeur and a historian in all of these things that she is a confidant, a companion, a lover and advisor and encourage your partner comfortable.

She's all of these things happy is the man who learns how to express Thanksgiving.

Nothing will do more to intimacy in a matter than for you to recognize those character traits and achievements in your life and you honor her coming up tomorrow will report to this important message from Adrian Rogers but maybe this lesson today has stirred up something in your heart that burdens you at Leavenworth finding one of our great honors is to come alongside you, and pray with you and for you if you can go to our website LWF.org/radio and scroll down to our prayer wall. There you'll find the option to submit a prayer request or pray for others. This resource is one of our favorite ways to keep the ministry in the community praying continually for one another's needs. Let us hear from you today after like to order a copy of today's message in its entirety. You can call 1877 love God because the title total togetherness. This message is also part of the insightful series superglue for the family that complete for message collection. Call 877 love God or order online@lwf.org/radio or write us at Leavenworth finding box 38, 600 Memphis, TN 38183 you may not know, but you could also purchase our new Bible studies, much like this message in our online store for information on that. Go to LWF.org/radio. Thanks for studying in God's word with us today if you like to start receiving daily devotions and links to the program sign-up for our daily heart emails do that online.

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Total togetherness right on love, buying before we go.

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