Melody in the Home | Part 1

The music of marriage men and women sing the same song take different we have a generation of our very mixed up.

They don't know whether being raised by a feminine man or masculine woman. What we see today is really a tribute to the failure of man divorce epidemic, sexual abuse, promiscuity, social awkwardness, emotional distress, and suicide. I think primarily is laid at the feet of the man and man must assume responsibility to Leavenworth between the insightful lessons in sound biblical teachings of Roger this month were studying God's design for marriage and how we can put the music back interrelationships God made men and women different so that he might make us one in marriage. Marriage ought to be a duet not a duel.

We sing the same song but we take different parts in the music of marriage. The man takes the lead and the woman takes the harmony.

If you have your Bible turned out of the book of Ephesians chapter 5.

Beginning in verse 18 as Adrian Rogers reveals what it takes to have Melody in the home. Ephesians chapter 5 is a music chapter and that we began in verse 18. The Bible says and be not drunk with wine. When a success would be filled with the spirit speaking to yourselves and Saul and Helms and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, giving thanks always for all things unto God and the father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God lives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord for the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word that he might present to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself for no man ever hated his own flash button nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord the church, but we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife and they too shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself in the wife see that she reverence her husband harmony in the hole we told you that in order for there to be music and music that we like to listen to.

There must be melody. We sing the same song.

There can be harmony. We sing different parts they ought to be rhythm where we sing it together. So, what an illustration of what marriage ought to be, and the music of marriage. Now we were talking this morning about the fact that God made men and women different that he might make us one and how that we sing the same song, but the man sings one part and takes the lead and the woman sings. The other part and harmonizes with her husband, but the things that I have given to you about the differences between men and women. I'm just going to take days off just to remind you that God teaches that the man is to be the provider and the woman is to be his helper number two.

The man is to be a protector.

The woman is to be a nurturer.

She's the one who gives life and the man is to take the lead and the woman is there to give beauty and enhancement to the home. Therefore, the man is more physically strong. The woman is more tender and more fragile in her nature. Now, God made us different that he might make this one you know Peter says where to be heirs together of the grace of life. That is, that together we inherit the blessing. I don't believe that you can inherit the blessing amounts are without your wife, and she cannot inherit it without you. God wants us to inherit those blessings together. Now let me give you some dynamic directions and we leave the book of Genesis and we come out to the apostle Paul and see how Paul took what happened in Genesis and the story of Genesis and he brings it over into the New Testament and tells us how this should apply to us, right here in the New Testament, may I say differ in that we have a generation of kids today who are very mixed up. They remind me of the rooster who saw a plate of scrambled eggs and said to the hand.

There goes our crazy mixed up kids. Now we have a group of crazy mixed up kids. Not all kids but we have a lot of them today. They don't know whether being raised by a feminine man or masculine woman.

There has been a blurring today of the distinction between the sexes. Most of it brought about by the radical feminist the radical feminist are but a tribute to the failure of man to be the kind of masculine men, that they ought to be. We have a generation of miniature men rather than mature masculine men and what we see today is really a tribute to the failure of man.

The divorce epidemic, sexual abuse, promiscuity, social awkwardness, emotional distress, and suicide. I think I merrily is laid at the feet of the men, and when he failed God did not primarily blaming God blamed Adam for Eve's failure, and man must assume responsibility now. With that in mind, let me give you five things that we men must do so many times when we come to Ephesians chapter 5 the women went so my cell is going to talk about being in submission again will dear friend I won't tell you. Ephesians chapter 5 is a much tougher passage on the men rightly interpreted. Let me tell you what you must do if you would be a masculine, not a midget miniature man if you want to have mature masculinity.

If you would like to be able to demonstrate to your son to your daughter what God's original intent is and what the divine design is going to find it right here. Number one, number one, Sir, you must assume responsibility.

Look, if you will, in verse 22 wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord for the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church and he is the Savior of the body. Now recall that sometimes the chain of command, but the chain of command is not the best way to describe that what we're really talking about here is the chain of responsibility to be the head literally means that you are responsible for doesn't mean that you exist to have your needs met.

Because you the head. It means you exist to meet me now husbands. We cannot escape that responsibility. But in your margin. First Corinthians 11 verse three.

The apostle Paul says, but I would have you to know that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is the man and the head of Christ is God and our problem is today that we have so many men who have not assume responsibility they have wanted to have headship without responsibility. Now, when your wife is told to be subject to you that mean she's to look to you for doesn't mean that she's there to be a servant, but she is there to have those basic needs met by you. The fact that she submits to you means that you have. Therefore the responsibility to take care of her and your leadership is to be servant leadership wives submission does not mean inferiority valve, the devil would tell us that if you are in submission.

Your inferior that's a lie out of hell. May I tell you that in Philippians chapter 2 tells us that the Lord thought.

Another thing to be grasped, but to be equal with God, yet made himself of no reputation took upon him the form of a servant, and became obedient and the Bible says wherefore God has highly exalted him, Jesus took the long way and God exalted him. The devil took the highway and God has brought him down and will bring him down to the very pit now what I'm saying is this that we are never more like Jesus.

When we have a submissive spirit will never more like the devil when we have a rebellious spirit that it God the father is the head of Christ, the son does that mean the Christ, the son is inferior to God the father, not at all. God the father, son and Holy Spirit are coequal and coeternal it would be sheer blasphemy and a distortion of the basic Christian doctrine to say that there is inferiority in the Godhead. And yet, eternally, the Lord Jesus Christ is in a state of submission to the eternal father. Now the woman is not at all inferior to the man when she is in submission to the man what Christian submission is this simply and plainly is one equal, voluntarily placing him or herself under another equal that Jesus Christ may therefore be glorified. That's only one equal, voluntarily placing him or herself under another equal, that God may therefore be glorified. Now so many times we talk about husband and wife is a partnership, but partnership is not the best way to describe David McClellan was here in the gave us a course in the role of the man in the family and one of the illustrations that he gave was tremendous. He said, don't think of the family with husband and wife as partners because when you have a partnership that you don't really have a head what you have.

Decisions are made all kinds of ways by votes and so forth and whoever gets the most votes in all of that, then that's the way the decisions are made for the Corporation.

What a husband and wife are more like an analogy that we can fit in with is not partnership but a the husband and the wife all the team must take a football team.

That's a good analogy of the relationship between husband and wife now a football team has a quarterback. I used to play football and a lot of time I played quarterback and the quarterback direct's between now who says that the quarterback is to call the place will coach says the quarterback is to call the place does that mean that the quarterback is the best athlete on the team, not necessarily so there may be other people on the team who can run faster than the quarterback have more agility, more natural ability than the quarterback but the quarterback called play simply because the coach said so does that mean that the husband is superior to the wife know he's just simply the quarterback of the team because the coach says so that's all is teamwork.

It doesn't mean that he is more competent than his wife. My Joyce is more competent than I am in a lot of areas and I just have to admit it. Now I can do something she can do, but she and some areas is more competent than I am and Joyce takes care of details in a home that would be difficult for me to take care of. I suppose I could do it but I'm so grateful that she is competent in those areas. But God the coaches still said that on-call point when I would call a play in football many times people would come back to the huddle and a guard would say I can move this fell out a wide receiver might say I move on it.I am free get the ball to me. I'm for somebody else would say I believe it's only three are doing the right of the middle" wasn't all that he also has to listen to the coach or just simply may send in a play that is all over you is due at the coach says he just may make up his own mind. This is the best way to run, but he calls the play, not because he's the best athlete just simply because the coach says somebody has to do it and it's better for everybody to be going in one direction after you come together now learn this man when were talking about assuming responsibility. The husband may delegate authority but not responsibility.

You may save your wife. My wife takes care of the finances, primarily in our house. I hardly ever write a check.

I don't touch the books she handles that she takes the money puts it in the bank writes the checks does all of these things pays the bills. All of that I have delegated that authority to her and she has the authority to do that. But while she has the authority she does not bear the responsibility I want to listen. You see there's no way that I can escape the responsibility so therefore if it all works out good. She is to be praying but it doesn't work out good I am to be blind & is he I can delegate the authority but I cannot escape my responsibility. That doesn't mean that a wife who is a member of the family therefore is inferior to husband him anyway. She may be superior Joyce as she don't want to be cool with me. She's not coming down for anything. There is the failure of men to assume responsibility now know husband therefore demands his headship did you know that the Lord Jesus Christ does not demand his headship as you know that the Lord Jesus Christ does not force his Lordship on you.

He doesn't I mean if he forced his Lordship on us. We all be a little better and we are in some ways, but we would be regimented and mechanical. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the church and and we don't demand headship.

You see, respect, and trust are earned and the Lord Jesus Christ is definitely earned my respect and he's earned my trust and so if you are husband and that you are having difficulty assuming headship in your home doll head for trust, don't shoot for trust shoot for respect lecturer wife learn to respect you as a man of God as a loving person is regular show and I want to tell you that trust will come automatically. We as husbands have to assume responsibility. It is this responsibility assume it's a safety net for the woman to respect the headship of the husband. He may delegate authority but not responsibility sir. There is no way that you can sidestep your responsibility so number one assume your responsibility, sir, you are head that does not mean a chain of command nearly so much as it means an assumption of responsibility number two number two best difference between the sexes means that you as the husband are to let your wife know that she is number one in your life.

The Bible says. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself some translations. I gave himself for it. Your wife must know that she comes before the children she comes before your own mother. Your own father for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife Joyce notes that she is number one of all human beings 5 million people in the face of this earth in my life. She is number one. I am nobody on the Senate out. I am number one and Joyce is like that gives me a sense of security to think that of all the people who ever lived today and have ever lived.

There is one person who loves me more than any other person on the face of the earth. What a feeling that is my heart that she loves me. That way, and she is to know that I love her that she is number one. I need to treat her.

Therefore, as Christ treated the church that Jesus gave himself for the church. Now the third thing. Not only do you need to let your wife know that she is number one but thirdly you need to ProTect your wife from emotional trauma.

Look, if you will hear in the same chapter, the Bible says that he gave himself for it. Verse 26 that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word that he might present to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their own. Why now.

This means that you are to protect her from emotional trauma and damage that your job and your responsibility, sir. You see the word spot that the Lord might present the church to himself without spot what that word spot means trash refuse dirt. It's your job to keep things from being dumped on your wife trash being dumped on her.

You have to be careful that you're not the guy that dumps on her that you come in and leave me and just unload on your wife things that maybe she cannot bear right at me very carefully because she doesn't want you to share your hurts with her. She doesn't want to know where you are hurting so she can come in and weep with you and caress you and care for you, but you have to be careful the things that you unload on her, especially, I would say sorry. One of the things I've learned most important time that I spend in the day is the first five minutes after I walk in the house at the end of the day. I mean if I go right to the house and go right to my study or go right through the house and go right to the news or whatever. I have failed Joyce, I need to go right to Joyce. I need to put her in my arms I need to hold her. I need to tell her that I love her. I need to call her on the phone before I get there and tell her I'm coming and that I can hardly wait to see her that so very important that five minutes it says to her you are number one. I'm not coming here to trash but I've come here really to take a load off of you and that I might present you myself without spot and then the next word is wrinkle the essay that and the word wrinkle is an interesting word. It speaks sort of an internal womb, a trauma that shows itself literally sometimes on the face. I'm not talking about the normal wrinkles that all of us get and the laugh lines in the crinkly places around the eyes, because we've laughed a lot through life. But I'm talking about. Sometimes the trauma that comes to a woman who has lived with a man who is been a midget man who is not really loved his wife is your I can sometimes spot these women you see them with their faces.

The countenance is tense and drawn. Because of these internal traumas they've not been loved as they ought to be love. You can see sometimes that pain just written on the face, husband is to ProTect is why my assignment from God sir, and your assignment from God is to make your wife a more radiantly beautiful Christian and with that, we conclude today's portion of this powerful message will hear part two tomorrow. If you have questions regarding your faith in Jesus.

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