Raising Kids That Count | Part 2

You tell your children the basic distinction between right and wrong. Listen to Adrian Rogers, you know. Sadly, we have a generation of kids today don't even know right from wrong is in their mind no distinction between a fixed standard of right and wrong is given how many of you have how many of you parents of grass about your kids not being able to read the 10 Commandments.

As you know, the prime educational institution is welcome to the word finding featuring the dynamic biblical lessons and insights from acclaimed pastor and Bible teacher Adrian Rogers. The book of Proverbs is full of wisdom for those who want to raise kids that counter the cause of Christ.

Part one of today's message past Rogers revealed that we are to give our children an example to live by unconditional love, constant encouragement and wise instruction. If you have your Bible turn to Proverbs chapter 1 as Adrian Rogers gives more instruction on raising kids that count. I want to talk to you today about some gifts that you can give to your children book of Proverbs tells us about these gifts, so let me mention seven of them if you like to have a gifted child. Okay, if you like to have a kid that counts her kidneys that count that will amount to something. The first thing you ought to give them is you need to give them an example give to them and example. Notice in Proverbs chapter 1 verses seven through nine.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge that they don't learn to respect God then I don't have a modicum of genuine knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law by mother for they shall be an ornament of grace under thy head, and chains about thy neck. Do not talk about an iron chain to drag around with him about a gold chain that will be something beautiful and in Proverbs chapter 20 in verse seven, the just man walks in his integrity, his children are blessed after him. I would say something folks your kids are going to learn more from your lifestyle than they going to learn from your words. You need to get to them. A godly example. Now that makes you nervous limited something. You don't have to pretend perfection. You know you not perfect and I got news for you. They already know you're not perfect. Did you know that a lot of things that they can't learn any other way. They Really learned in Sunday school, they can learn in public school they got to be demonstrated, what we're interested in with our kids. Well, sports greats, physical health, popularity, ability but who is teaching them character I married some character traits to contentment in the school and on contentment 101.

I then will get that college courage courtesy, discernment, fairness, friendliness, generosity, gentlemen's helpfulness, honesty and humility, kindness, obedience, orderliness, patience and persistence. Self-control pack thankfulness tightness wisdom where they can learn these things these things are not so much talk as they are caulked, we owe to our kids and example.

Now number two not only give to them. A godly example, but give to them conditional love.

I write these things down into 7-Up, you would have a gifted child. Give him unconditional outlook.

In Proverbs chapter 4 verses one through four. He children the instruction of a father, and attend to know understanding. I give you good doctrine forsake you. Not my law. Yes, that's fine. Good doctrine teaching law. Yes, notice this for I was my father's son tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. He taught me also and set him to me.

Let thine heart retain my words, keep my commandments and live you know we need to give to our kids love that is absolutely totally unconditional.

I have noticed that men who have fathers who did not love them do not really know how to give love to the kids. They have to be taught and we have to have a generation of men now who are going to mentor some of the men who never had a father to actually give them love and to show them unconditional love. We have to break that cycle.

Unconditional love doesn't mean that you give to a child everything you want.

That's not really love it all. True love is not giving someone what they wanted is giving to someone what they need, but there must be unconditional acceptance regardless of the child's misbehavior. I may not accept what you do but I accept you they need to know that enough so that when they are in trouble when they do misbehave, they still come to they will be afraid to complete that if they don't have a sense that my dad loves me no matter what I do. My mom loves me no matter what I do, then I go to share the mess ups with you then need to be that unconditional love and you know that love needs not to be merely words, but it has to have some physical attachments to short by touching short by sympathy when they have their problems and friend. They have the problems that you may think of the problems the kids have are not big problems. Good behavior problems that big to the kid and that's what matters. Cry with them when they hurt.

I win their little gradeschool romances breakup be concerned about them with all of these things. When a pet dies jabber attend the funeral for a turtle dog we had some of those that are homes in I know what it is all grown daughter in my arms and and and literally cry with her as she cries.

Show them sympathy and the point I'm trying to make is this that not only do you need to give them an example. You need to get to them on conditional love okay that was very you need to get to them. Constant encouragement you bless your children with encouragement when you regularly encourage a child what you're doing is giving to that child confidence and confidence is so needed. What you're really doing is blessing the child over and over again we ask our heavenly father.

What what is the one thing would probably say more than anything else. We prayed our heavenly father, God bless me God bless me. You want your heavenly father to bless you. I'm to New York child needs a blessing from his earthly father and that blessing is in encouragement. Learn to encourage these kids. Encouragement says I love you I I'm grateful for you, not necessarily because you achieved, but because of who you are brimming.

Give them an example give them unconditional love.

Give them encouragement.

Now it's time to give them wise instruction look in Proverbs 2 verses one through seven. Here's the instruction listen to my son, if thou wilt receive my words and hide my commandments with the so that thou incline thine ear and to wisdom, and apply thine heart to understanding. Yea, if thou Christ after knowledge and lift us up by voice for understanding, if thou seek is her, that is knowledge as silver, and searches for her as for hidden treasures then shalt thou understand the fear of the Lord, and find the knowledge of God, for the Lord giveth wisdom out of his mouth cometh knowledge and understanding. He laid up sound wisdom for the righteous, and he is up to them that walk up rightly, and then the corresponding passage Proverbs 22 verse six train up a child in the way that he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.

Now we give them wise instruction but wise instruction is always join the training by way when you children little it's always good to have family worship to start the day with the word of God. Now my wife and I tried all kinds of things with our kids family worship. I want to give you one of the simplest, easiest forms of family worship at all.

Why didn't discovered a long time ago. It is such a blessing. We just let somebody choose a proper one. The little children old enough to read our room shop. Choose the proper and they take the Bible and choose a proper bacon due to random or at like sometimes I do the book of Proverbs is basically the same as the number of days in the month to the proper from that particular day. If it's the 17th from seven chapter Proverbs and read a proverb, just one and let that child explain what he thinks the proper means than anybody else just talk about for a few moments. It is so simple, but what what you're doing when those children are learning those Proverbs and having to think about what it means that is distilled wisdom that is something that's just a nugget of truth that they can carry with them to school and/or but what I'm trying to say is, give them wise instruction.

Let that instruction be joined with training, train up a child I used to play football. I'll guarantee one thing friend nobody ever learn how to play football by merely reading a book about right.

You have to train the play football, you have to train to learn particular things ever watch a man train a dog hunting dog that is an amazing thing you have to train it all. I saw man the other day downtown had a dog leash little stick. He had a bird on the thing I thought my goodness, I want to be as any kids on what he does with his kids. If a man, which meant that much time with this kid as he does with his dog. I don't know but probably that man dies a dog up at night… Gives run while trying train give instruction line upon line, precept upon precept, the prime educational institution is the whole ghetto. Sadly, we have a generation of kids today who don't even know right from wrong.

They really don't. Josh McDowell said this, based on the church gives listen to this accordant is research, 57% of our young people cannot even say that an objective standard of truth exists that stretch kids. More than half of don't even believe that there is a fixed standard of right and wrong and 85% of our kids are liable to reason like this just because it's wrong for you, doesn't mean that it is wrong for me. Over half 55% agree with this statement. Everything in life is negotiable. There is in their mind no distinction between a fixed standard of right and wrong is given in the 10 Commandments, the messy question how many of you think is a disgrace that the 10 Commandments of been taken from the walls of America schools and some are trying to remove them from public places. Most of us would agree that second question how many of you have the 10 Commandments posted in your home, don't answer that be too embarrassing third question how many of you parents who grouse about the kids not being able to read the 10 Commandments in school militant command that some of you if I type, I would pull you out where you appear you could name the 10 Commandments in order. If I gave you a Ferrari try to if we do not give them wise instruction and that instruction is joined with training. Number five. Give them reasonable restrictions now underscore the word reasonable. Proverbs 6 beginning in verse 20. My son keep my father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother buying them continually upon thine heart and tie them around about dinette when thou goest to show lead they will now sleep is that you keep the when. Now wait just a short talk with the more the commandment is a lamp and the law is light and the reproof knows this. The reproof's of instruction all the way of life.

Now we set goals for kids at least encourage them to set goals for themselves. But we also need to give them limitation, there are some things that need to be denied. There are restrictions and we have a society today. The believe that's wrong but I would say that God had some children put them in the garden of Eden, and God gave them some limitations. God gave us some restrictions to his original prayer adamantly limitations don't bind the child really.

They set them right.

When you give a child limitations restrictions. He will push against him. If they did have that child will have no confidence whatsoever.

He will feel unloved if those restrictions move and if you don't put limitations on them. He will allow somebody else to do the same thing.

It is an amazing thing.

No limitation on the child implies that you have rejected that child and that's the reason so many children are conquered by somebody else. Now limitations today looked on the something bad but they're not. And sometimes we as parents need to stop trying to win a popularity contest and just simply say there are some restrictions now don't make a lot of little rules make a few big and keeping matter fact I tried when I was bring this message.

I tried to think about what the big rules were not home and basically only two but they were ironclad.

Number one no dishonesty.

Don't you ever lied to me that's cool no dishonesty number two. No disrespect, no disrespect, and special event, not disrespect your mama while I'm around now there's some things I look the other way that some things wink at the sump.

Don't tell me a lie. No dishonesty have no disrespect mother some subsets of those things but but has some limitations. Have them real all right now you owe to them. Restrictions and find out what they are now the next gift to them. A listening ear. Proverbs 18 verses 13 and then following.

He that answer the matter before here if it is folly and shame to him, the spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity. That is his weakness but a wounded spirit who can bear. I mean if if the child spirit is broken is terrible. The heart of the prudent ghetto knowledge and the ear of the wise seek knowledge. You have to be willing to listen when they walked in tall now. Many times they won't talk. Our oldest son is a dear kid 11 but there time when he's like the Sphinx is one talk and then suddenly and always be after midnight. Open up and talk and talk and talk and talk and does not say this is a golden moment would sit there and listen you have to be ready when they are ready and you have to make time to take that that daughter that granddaughter on a date. Glad to come out to me you want the best thing to do. If you have a kid that just won't open up to begin with. Take a moment drive drive hundred 50 miles may want to get to say anything and suddenly it will begin to happen where you can talk and listen to these kids and make it happen. Be ready. Don't be in a rush, listen to them, never be too busy to listen to your child specially a teenager. Give them a happy environment.

Listen to Proverbs 15 verse 13 a merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken, the heart of him that hath understanding secret knowledge, but the mouth of fools feeders own foolishness. All the days of the afflicted or evil. But he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast. Better is little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble there with better is a dinner of herbs at the baseball plate will love is that a stalled office.

That's filet mignon and hatred there with his wife, a vegetable plate is better than a steak dinner if you have love. If you have enjoy. If you have happiness. Let your whole be with laughter and fun to raise kids being firm be fair and be fun. Don't be ashamed. If you have a sense of humor. Psychologist tell us that a good sense of humor is one of the highest signs of intelligence and laughter lubricates the home and let your home reading with laughter. This first talked about those. I have a broken spirit I when the string is that the spark disaster enthusiasm.

The fight is gone. Mama talk about course unclean laughter.

The Bible warns in Ephesians 5, verse four. Neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, or jesting, which are not convenient but rather giving thanks you said is God believe in laughter give you verse Genesis 21 verse six and Sarah said God has made me to laugh so that all that here will laugh with me. God gave her son in what she called her son Isaac and what Isaac means laughter. By the way, learn to laugh at yourself, learn to laugh at your problems. You have limited life when I was a kid that in Florida we had a terrible hurricane become through and my dad was out there with the other men nailing up plywood on the windows and doing all this stuff and the wind was chill moved my bed came in. He shivered all the electricity was often my dad came in the house and shut the door against the wind. I'm a little more. Their eyes wide wondering is our house going to blow away. Is this it my dad so cold he's looked at my mother and said I give five dollars for a cup of coffee.

My mother went to to fill the pot with water put on the gas stove making cup coffee forgot we had a gas go. He looked at her recent pocket and gave her five dollars and we just had a big laugh.

The big lie just a time of tension is learn how to land friend listen, you have a gifted child.

If you give a child the seven gifts and I promise you on the authority of the word of God to make a difference in your home. I thank God for Christian home. I don't know anything any better than a Christian home your home that exist so you do your business. Your business exist. So you have your home and I tell you this, that God ideally wants everybody to have three home she know what they are a family home a church home and heavenly home.

Jesus is the greatest homebuilder. Satan is the greatest homewrecker God wants you to have a family home.

Maybe you and often.

Maybe you divorced, maybe a separated would you need some kind of a family home, community, church home. Placing her brothers and sisters in Christ and then you need to know that you know that you know when you die you going to heaven to the father sense that Jesus is the key to all three. You have to know the Lord Jesus Christ. If you like to receive Jesus Christ, I invite you to pray this prayer after me.

I don't just repeat words. Make it your prayer dear God, thank you for loving me. I need to be say I am a sinner by sin deserves judgment, but I need and I want mercy Lord Jesus, thank you for paying for my sin with your blood on the cross. Thank you that you suffered bled and died for me that I might be saying thank you Jesus Lord Jesus. I open my heart I receive you now by faith is my Lord and my Savior come into my life. Forgive my sin clinch me forgiving saying I receive it by faith, and that settles in your name. I for if you prayed to receive Jesus Christ just now we want to celebrate with you and invite you to our discovery, Jesus page on the website you find answers there. You may need about your newfound faith. We have a response section as well. You can share your testimony with us or let us know how this message has helped you in your spiritual walk. Go to LWF.org/radio and click the tab that says Discover Jesus welcome to God's forever family.

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Call us at 1877 love God and mention the title raising kids that count. This message is also part of the insightful fortifying your family series for the complete collection, all six powerful messages: number 1877 love God or you can order online@lwf.org/radio or write us at love worth finding box 38, 600 Memphis, TN 38183 Adrian Rogers said a vegetable plate is better than a steak dinner. If you have love, joy and happiness. If you want to raise kids the camp for the cause of Christ. Remember to be firm, fair, fun as reminder, you can receive daily devotions and links to my daily message programs. When you sign up for our daily heartbeat. Email LWF.org/join us next time.

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