Trouble at Home, Part 3

Is were watching a generation of sons and daughters were truly charged out of the family. Best, often unequipped to fly on their own and it's never been more challenging to help our children prepare for the realities of life today on Insight for living. Chuck Swindoll continues our study in the book of second Samuel, for the Bible gives us a glimpse into the life of David in this message.

Called trouble at home will witness the repercussions of David's rebellion in the way it traveled through his family tree. There are two kinds of problems that a family can endure trouble from without and trouble from within. David endures with his family trouble from within.

I don't think there's any way to write in the sacred record awful kill this man lived with. As he looked back over the months of working to travel through the night and trace the steps of the downward trend of misery because he send during that 12 month period of time when David so to the place he re-put the flesh produced.

Moreover, he reaped the consequences of his actions even though he had confessed to send a been forgiven for it.

Second Samuel chapter 12 the general prediction is the sword will never depart from your house now verse 11 introduces us to the first of eight steps downward in David's misery, marital infidelity that is the first verse 11. Behold, I will raise up evil against you from your own household. I will even take your wives before your eyes and give them to your companion, and he shall live with your wives in broad daylight. As a matter of fact, when you trace the prediction that is here into chapter 16, you find that is exactly what happened, his own son Absalom cohabited with his concubines. Where is it David first fell into sin and planted the seeds on the roof on the roof of the palace. As if to say, will rub his nose in it.

So they pitched a tent on the roof of the palace and it says Absalom went to his father's concubines in the sight of all Israel tell you that's a consequence to bear the shameful thing, let's go to the second back to chapter 12 verse 15 the loss of the newborn baby. Not only was there marital infidelity. There was loss of the baby.

Nathan went to his house. Then the Lord struck the trial that Uriah's widow boarded David is interesting, it does not call her, his wife, David's wife calls her Uriah's widow boarded David so that he was very sick.

Verse 17 the elders of the household stood beside him, verse 18. Then it happened on the seventh day that the child died. There is 1/3 chapter 13 verses 1 to 14 one of David's sons rapes his sister.

Now you will notice that on the half-brother is attracted to tame our half-sister.

The blood sister of Absalom. The reason I want to present. That is because Absalom comes to her defense later on. And now you know why she was to him very precious.

After the brother rape the sister. There was a sense of instant hate and he put her out and guess where she went to her brother Absalom. It says in verse 20 Absalom her brother said to her, has Amnon your brother been with you doesn't record an answer, but I imagine she nodded her head. Imagine that in the shame and disgrace of her experience.

She simply had the strength just an odd, now keep quiet. My sister, he's your brother. Do not take this matter to heart.

So Taymor remained and was desolate in her brother Absalom's house.

Verse 22 but Absalom did not speak to Amnon either good or bad for Absalom hated Amnon because he had violated his sister tame our step number four.

The brother hates a brother, Absalom and Amnon did not speak it says for two years. Verse 23 for two full years. It went on.

Now when asked something where in the world was David. Where is the father. Dad's we are living in the generation of the absent father not tell you the mother is not designed to cope as both mom and dad is not her place was never designed for the mother to be the sole source of discipline and authority but we are living in a generation of the authoritative mother who was taken the role that was never hers to take simply because the father has become occupied 16 hours and more a day somewhere else and when his home if the truth is known. He is addicted to the television set. You know me well enough to know that I'm not for throwing out all the TVs.

I'm not forgetting rid of all of things that happen on TV in all programs. I am saying dad's it's in.

That's amazing how little discipline we show in being unable to walk over and turn a little about 1 inch to the left toward cliques so much easier to start a sticker thumb in the book and look over our glasses and say no don't do that gets right back to it in the set that aside and deal with the problem but that's hard for the truth were known, we would rather say it's her job. After all, now making Jonah, so privileged to live in this kind of place I provided her but got a palace to David provide for his D number one there was a fabulous bad, but it didn't handle the problem at all. Absalom and his brother and he did so for two years I didn't even speak, whether good or bad. The result will verse 2:23 full years, Absalom starts his little deceptive plan, Absalom is quite a guy Voorhees.

He was awake a lot earlier than his dad went to bed a lot later played his father for a food will offer the plan were all of would go down to sheer sheet and the dad said not of that we should verse 24 Absalom came the king and said now you're serving as sheep shares. Please let the king of the servants go with your servant king said after know my son. We should not all go.

This would be burdensome to although he urged him he would not go blessed and then Absalom said. If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us this data been on target. He would know that Absalom is not spoken to Amnon for two years to be rather thick as a father did not know that the son of the sun for two years and then David not look talk about lack of discipline.

Absalom encouraged him. Verse 27 and Amnon. He let Amnon and all the king's sons go with.

He urged many what he badgered the big play, he intimidated to use guilt, and the father does the right kind of priority, the right, time is a victim of his guilt and kids manipulate and intimidate and before long the dads giving in, go ahead.

Just leave doing. Look at what happened, you won't believe it.

20 Absalom commanded his servant, saying, seeing out when Amnon's hearts Mary with wine when I say to you, strike putting to death no fear I've commanded you. 29. That's what they did but that's not all the servants of Absalom. Did Amnon just as Absalom had commanded that all the king's sons arose each mountains. Mu fled. It was while they were on the way that the report came to David, Absalom has struck down all the king's sons and not one of them is left if you tracing the steps down. We now have Absalom murdering Amnon a brother murders her brother internal strife. The sword will never depart out of your out of your household.

David and here he is groaning under the ache of it all that. That's not bad enough, another step Absalom verse 33, 34, when the report came back all the king's sons are dead.

Verse 34 Absalom fled, so we have number six rebellion and runaway Absalom's on his way and while he's away.

By the way he went to granddaddy's house.

Verse 38, Absalom fled going to guess your that's where his granddaddy lived may act as dad was a king in glacier. He can't live at home to go back to granddad while he licks his wounds and sets up his plan to rebel against his daddy and that's precisely what he does. Step number seven Absalom leads a conspiracy against his father while chapter 15 will 1428, Absalom lived two full years in Jerusalem did not see the king's face. He sent for Joab and he wouldn't calm, so we sent a second time and he still would be calm and then through another chain of events. Absalom got on the king's doorstep and began to steal the hearts of the people you read the record for yourself.

He stood at the gate of the king and his people came to seek counsel, David Absalom short-circuited he intercepted them as they came hug them and kiss them and wonder hearts and got them on his side, said bad things about his father and before long he had the majority vote, and of all things. It says in verse 14 David said to all his servants. Verse 14 of chapter 15 arise and let us flee. Otherwise, none of us shall escape from Absalom doesn't charge the sun. It happens every time parents on the run is a book written by Beecher and Beecher husband-wife team and if they give strong advice to parents today. The adult center, home of yesteryear made parents the Masters and children, their slaves, the child centered home of today has made parents slaves in children.

The Masters there is no true cooperation in the master slave relationship and therefore no democracy neither restrictive authoritarian technique of rearing children nor the newer anything goes technique developed the genius within the individual because neither trains him to be self-reliant. I listen. Children raised under arbitrary rules become either spineless automatons or bitter revolutionaries who waste their lives in conflict with those around them with children who know no law higher than their own passing fancy become trapped by their own appetites.

In either case, they are slaves is precisely what happened. Absalom some number of years ago. The headlines read in this article. Sons says parents failed him. So he sues them for $350,000 in Colorado, a young man sues his parents for damages for $350,000 is 25-year-old fellow because it didn't raise them right on any ideas about getting aside, I wonder how many kids just just to ponder the thought would feel they have the right to sue their parents. That's not the answer. Certainly Norm saying that's always a parents fault. I think the scapegoat of our days always mom and dad are often mom and dad that that's unfair what is it going to take for the blinders to be removed the shades to be lifted and the truth to be seen by but parents in putting together a family tell you it is devastating in our era. Everything in the world comes in place of the essentials I counseled with a young man a number of years ago said in my office and with the curled lip, grim face stared coldly at me as we talked about his home.

I've been he'd been sent to me by his parents and I could hardly break through that thick hide and I said to him tell me about your dad, and he uttered an oath and in cleared his throat and looked out the window and my dad. He said my one great go to killing.

So I tried once a failed next on the seething with emotion and began to describe time after time after time after time. His dad ridiculed embarrassed took advantage of beat didn't trust putting down to where that boy is now in Absalom taller than his dad just a matter of time. Tell you David is under the awful strain of all of this and if that's not bad enough, the final straw. Joab murders Absalom chapter 18 verse 32. Here we are at the end of a whole series of things in the sword is not a party from David's house and here he is living in the backwash of the carnality are the consequences of carnality ruing the day he never even looked at Bathsheba and Karen all year of deception and finally in the backwash of the rape of a sister. The conspiracy of a son. The rebellion of a son hatred. The murder and he sitting alone, no doubt perspiring to the point of exhaustion and incomes. The report, verse 3218 32, the king said to the Cushite. This is the run of the team from the battle isn't well with white with a young man, Absalom sees guilty over this boy couldn't handle him a nice concerned that he somehow get it back together. The Cushite answered, but the enemies of my lord the king and all rise up against you for evil be is that young man, which is a gracious way of saying that boy is dead. I look. The king was deeply moved to the most tragic parental account and all the Old Testament deeply moved book where he went he went to the chamber over the gate and he wet and he said as he walked look at it. Walking up and down all my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom died instead of you all. Absalom, my son, my son be not deceived, God is not mocked.

Whatever a man sows, that he will reap if you have taken lightly. The grace of God.

If you have trip through the corridors of the kingdom like a like a little child picking and choosing sin or righteousness. It will thinking. Grace covers it all.

You missed it. My friend, you missed it is a matter of fact, it's quite likely there has begun the process of consequences. You too thick to realize that you were harvesting the bitter blossoms of the your seeds planted way back. What is it going to take what is it going to take in the family of God to turn our lives in his great grace back to his beautiful plan. Well it is going to take saying no to good things and fun things that satisfy you, dad, mom or kids. It's going to take a honest and an honest admission of the truth either to a friend or to the parents themselves are the kids. Whichever the relationship need is an honest admission and declaration. This is out of whack.

This has gone on time after time after time, and I I cannot go on like this. Some of you this very evening are living in a compromising situation and just with a skinnier teeth. You just sort of skipping along Norsk skimming along the surface, hoping it'll never catch up. But God is not mocked. It has caught up part of the catching up is the misery that you live with and I do not attempt to take it away. I don't lay a guilt trip on anybody. I'm saying the God brings it. It is from the Holy Spirit and is between you and him let's pause now and spell. David is a is a beaten man strung out sobbing as if he lost his mind.

Every crutches removed is at the bitter end. The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ. If you've never met the Lord Jesus. Of course I point you to him, turn to him tonight. Turn your life to him broken and bruised in twisted and confused is laid out before asking to give you the grace to face realistically and straight on the consequences her father in the quietness of these moments together. I ask that you would somehow put together the pieces that that only you can do. I cannot in turn our attention to to your son, our only claim I only hope of father I I plead with you to stop the process in the sand and some lives that are here. Only you know who they are and to cause us to see that our holy God is not mocked. I pray first for disciplined moms and dads. I pray for that to be balanced with a very sincere and deep love only you can bring give us the ability Lord as you forgive us to forgive ourselves so that we have a clear mind in realizing that you will take us through in your grace will sustain us serious. This is tonight.

I pray that there might be some dads raised up who will for change be dancing in take the role of leadership that is theirs whirlwind. They are reaping. I ask that you would slow them down and bring them to their knees. I asked that for myself tonight. Our father we wait on you to do these things.

We trust you for this for this in the name of Christ.

This may be the lowest moment in David's life. He's truly come to the end of himself and in the coming programs. Chuck Swindoll will continue to describe the timeless lessons that emerge from this painful season and David story. This is inside for living and Chuck titled today's message trouble at home to learn more about this ministry, we invite you to visit us online@insideworld.org it's possible you readily identify with David's painful mistakes or maybe you been on the receiving end of someone's betrayal on the authority of God's promises. We believe that he can redeem your painful circumstances. As you learn to embrace the truth. Chuck wrote a highly acclaimed book that promises to be an inspiration in your daily pursuit of God's best. It'll help you prepare for unexpected temptations for anything that might derail your growth in Christ. Whether it's the temptation to compromise or a struggle with jealousy and envy every follower of Christ needs to gain a strong hold on the wisdom of God's word, the title of Chuck's book is strengthening your grip. Chuck addresses 16 relevant topics such as managing your money.

Coping with the aging process making time for leisure and setting proper priorities.

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The preceding message trouble at home was copyrighted in 1978, 1988, 1997, 2009 and 2012 and the sound recording was copyrighted in 2012 by Charles R. Swindoll. All rights are reserved worldwide. Application of copyrighted material for commercial use is strictly prohibited