E-Harmony vs. Disharmony, Part 1

Standing at the wedding and exchanging their tearful files a bride and groom anticipate a lifetime love them while, but sometimes tragically, that is how their story plays out when life takes over an intense pressure began to eclipse.

There romanticized intention for Mary the same two people begin to see separation is the only way to find relief today on Insight for living Chuck Swindoll's teaching from Matthew chapter 19 on the insight Jesus gave about marriage and divorce. Chuck titled today's message eHarmony versus disharmony. I often think what a privilege is to have a copy of the Scriptures in our own language. Available in so many versions and texts, fonts, and inconvenient ways of reading it so easy to take it all for granted we have the very word of God in this magnificent book we call the Bible so easy to take all of that for granted is in it and we've had all of our lives. We never know the day in this great country where we have not been able to find a Bible and turn it read something Jesus said or something.

Moses wrote or some event that took place in Joseph's life or or David or Elijah or one of the disciples we we we have a vignette today in Matthew 19. Sort of a slice of life that occurred that has become a believer not a battleground because of the subject matter. It has to do with marriage and divorce and I say before we get into it that no single sermon will answer all the questions but perhaps your your interest will be Pete and you will pursue answers by turning again to what will be reading as well as related sections that are called parallel passages. First Corinthians 7 addresses the subject Ephesians 5, first Peter three Deuteronomy 24 Genesis wanted to so sprinkled through the Bible, the subject of marriage and sometimes even marriage and divorce or are addressed and we are wise to hear what God is written, but let me add as I will today in the message. There is not only the ministry of the word where we study verses of Scripture. There is also the ministry of God for he uses wisdom and common sense experience, knowledge gained through pain to help open our eyes to truth. So let's while we love God's word and and bow before it is, it instructs us must be careful not to be guilty of bibliology three, where we worship the print on the page and limit everything that relates to our decision to a verse here a verse there a statement made here or one there that we put together in a system of thought that makes sense to us. All this to say life is very complicated. Marriage is very complicated and the breakup of a marriage is humiliating, heartbreaking, sad, disappointing, tragic, leaving people in its wake, including children, as well as those in the family who who ate as it occurs.

All of this to say let's be sure. As we read the Scriptures that we see a bigger picture about life than just what is written in this single section. Okay I say all that.

So you won't pick up stones to stone me when we have finished because I'm going to take you into a journey that you do not expect, but hopefully it will help all of us understand with greater wisdom what God would have us know and do. I will send it right. Matthew chapter 19 verses one through 12 is the section were looking at. I'm reading from the new living translation similar to the one you're using, but different in various other ways, but reliable. Nevertheless, Matthew 19 when Jesus had finished saying these things. He left Galilee and went down to the region of Judea, East of the Jordan River. Large crowds followed him there and he healed their sick. Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question.

Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason, haven't you read the Scriptures. Jesus replied, they record that from the beginning God made them male and female, and he said this explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife and the two are united into one since they are no longer two but one let no one split apart what God has joined together, why did Moses say in the wall that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away. They had Jesus replied, Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your heart hearts but it was not what God had originally intended, and I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery unless his wife is been unfaithful. Jesus disciples visiting him. If this is the case, it is better not to marry. Not everyone can accept this statement Jesus said only those whom God helps. Some are born as eunuchs.

Some of been made eunuchs by others and some choose not to marry for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this. Who can look again at the last line was a lot of grace in that line.

Jesus isn't poking his long index finger into your sternum saying accept this and believe it and go with it. He says that anyone accept this.

Who can keep that in mind as the tone I want to said as we go with the subject to study the book of Matthew Chuck Swindoll.

Be sure to download his searching the Scriptures insight world.or/studies. Another message from Chuck titled eHarmony versus disharmony four-year-old Susie was so excited she could hardly stand.

She was sitting in her preschool class hearing for the very first time. The story of snow white.

She can't wait to get home and tell her mother about it and her favorite part of the story. She just jumped into. She said you know, Prince charming came on his beautiful white horse and he kissed snow white back to life and you know what happened in my why yeah, honey. She said they they lived happily ever after. No, no, they got married in childlike innocence gluten-free schoolgirl spoke the truth without even realizing it.

Getting married and living happily ever after, are not necessarily synonymous. Several years ago I was bringing a series on marriage and the family and there was a lot of interest in it and following the service. The line was long and one of the individuals who would set through the service and Harley taken his eyes off of me didn't wait in the line but just walked ahead and reached over and handed me of a very carefully folded note handwritten one sentence. I waited till I got home to read it and I unfolded it and it read the most difficult years of marriage are those following the wedding well if aliens differ. Those who live in unhappy marriages would be quick to say that there is a short distance between eHarmony and this harmony but marriage really is not all that it's cracked up to be on the other hand, those of us who have lived for decades with the one who has been our partner for life and have known a lot of the joys of marriage, not to mention some of the challenges as well would be quick to say that this individual is not only our marriage partner. But our very best friend. Perhaps that's why I love the story of the marriage between Sir Winston and Clementine Churchill, the former prime minister was once asked if you had your life to live over again what would you want to be after 55 years of marriage.

Sir Winston quickly replied with a twinkle in his eye. I would want to be Mrs. Churchill's second husband is easy to forget the reality of an unhappy marriage goes all the way back to the beginning of life in a home because sin landed hard on the very first couple and changed everything. Adam and Eve had known nothing in that place of innocence, but beauty and harmony in a closeness and intimacy so much so that they existed naked with one another and were never ashamed not only physically unashamed but emotionally unashamed. There were no ugly secrets. There were no dance, and broken places from the past that they dragged into the marriage there were there were no trivial reasons to break up or even significant reasons for.

They lived in innocence until sin came in from the coming of sin in their lives all the way to this very day. The presence of sin has done its best to ruin every marriage if it could let me be quick to say that there are those who live together as long as they possibly can. But for justifiable reasons. They finally break it all and that rather even live the rest of their lives alone than to try to make it in the mystery of what has been for them. Heartbreaking.

Horrendous life with another person and then admittedly there are those who, for the most trivial reasons in the wedding in the marriage and move on in life and find another partner and another trivial set of reasons. In that relationship and find another and then before I could go on and on and it's affected not only life in the secular world it's affected the church. That's what is changed in my 50+ years in ministry. There was a time when it was not quite as much an issue in the church as it now is for there is hardly a difference between the secular world and the issue of divorce and the church world and the issue of divorce, chances are good that half of you listening to me today have been through the sad debilitating experience of a breakdown in your marriage, and his heart as it is to look back on it and is humiliating as it feels you remember it with sadness and heartbreak it's affected your children it's affected your family. It's affected those who were once close friends. Unfortunately it may have even affected your relationship with others in the church and here we find ourselves now dealing with it again when we come to Matthew 19 before I get into it and I will get into it fully was sort of set the stage for it because that has something to do with why the Pharisees say what they say.

A little later on in this question answered time with Jesus first as a geographical description of where they are always note that when you get into a chapter. If geography is mentioned.

Always have your maps handy from the back of your Bible to trace where you're talking about so that your oriented will save a little time but not turning today but I'll try to describe it so that will all understand we read when Jesus had finished saying these things.

He left Galilee. That's up north in Israel, he left up north. Eddie went down that self coming down to the region of Judea east of the Jordan River generally surrounds the sea of Galilee. The river Jordan connects that CD with the Dead Sea unit runs its course from the Sea of Galilee south to the Dead Sea. There's a west side where Jerusalem is down for the southern part when you get into Judea and there was an eastern part which is the land known as Korea TER EA so there over on the Peruvian side. The east of Jordan and there we noticed the crowds and followed in and there he again is healing the sick. It must've been wonderful. No matter where we went. There were crowds no matter where the crowds or how many there were healings. It must've been a time of rejoicing.

For those who had been sick as well as the loved ones who brought them to Jesus. So here are the east of Jordan in the land Korea we have a gathering of rejoicing people as there is healing in Jesus without any showmanship whatsoever without accepting one coin for his work, for he did not do it to be seen or to get rich. He did it out of love for those who were hurting and in his healing of them. There are these who rejoice over it. But there is a smaller group in the in the crowd that isn't rejoicing and isn't smiling there.

There to find a reason to accuse him to discredit him that they might arrest him and put him away.

We know that the public doesn't know that. But we know the book of Matthew we know the Bible we know all of this is moving inexorably toward the cross. That's why he's moving toward Jerusalem he won't be back in Galilee again.

But the Pharisees who knew their Bible though they didn't live the truth.

They certainly added to the Scriptures with their 600+ rules and regulations.

They were the consulate legalists. They were the people who stirred up controversy and here is no exception.

The Pharisees came I read in verse three. They tried to trap him with this question. Look at the question. Verse three. Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason. However, they frame the question like that because that was the growing opinion of that day.

Most rabbis taught that it was based on the teaching of the school of Hillel HR double LDL Pelayo, the school of Hillel was a liberal to the core and those who taught there and those who learned from those rabbis carry the message into Galilee, into Judea and all over the land of Israel that marriages for the least reason you can imagine, able to be broken by the husband.

By the way, never by the wife in the Middle East in that Iran the wife of woman was a thing not valued, not respected.

Truly an unworthy creature so you never read of the woman divorcing her husband, your read of the man divorcing his wife will not get it any better. I'll be here at 3 o'clock so will leave that alone. But obviously it was a was a bad idea and the bad plan and a bad part of that culture. Anyway, what were some of the reasons they gave for divorce.

Hold on. Talk about trivial. They taught that if the wife spoiled her husband's meal bird, his toast, he could divorce her. I was reading this list to Cynthia.

She thought about it for about a split second and said, but had a bad husband not burn his toast every day. But that's not inspired, so we move on. If she went about with her hair unbound he could get a divorce if she spoke to me in the streets, but her husband wasn't with her. The husband could divorce her if she spoke disrespectfully of his parents. He could divorce her if she raised her voice in a disagreement without a note that she could be heard by the neighbors he could divorce her. Here's another one. If the husband found a woman more beautiful than his wife and caused him to little longer.

Find favor in his wife he could get rid of the wife and marry this woman that he felt was more beautiful.

It was those in the dozen other trivial reasons that double take the time to name Jesus. Do you believe that you believe that for just any reason a man could divorce his wife. There was also another school of thought is on the other extreme, it was called the school of show my SHA EM MAI show my rabbis show my taught and is very conservative that under no, for no reason whatsoever was divorce ever permissible ever, under any circumstance. It was the most narrow hard-line position one can imagine it was. Not only unpopular it was, in fact, unscriptural or that is not the position of Scripture. We are fully aware that today's subject deserves far more time one half hour program were devoting Monday and Tuesday to addressing this serious issue of marriage and divorce, so please keep listening.

Chuck Swindoll titled this study. Matthew 19 eHarmony versus disharmony and to discover the resources we have available on today's topic, please visit us online@insightworld.org in recent days. You've heard me make the observation that this daily program is widely known as the centerpiece to Insight for living ministries. But after a half-hour, and when the program is over your listening doesn't need to stop here. In addition to this Bible teaching program.

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Join us again Monday. Chuck Swindoll continues his message titled eHarmony versus disharmony right here on Insight for living. The preceding message eHarmony versus disharmony was copyrighted in 2017 and 2021 and the sound recording was copyrighted in 2021 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. all rights are reserved worldwide. Duplication of copyrighted material for commercial use is strictly prohibited