Building Wise Friendships - Part 1

Welcome to the end. That's bad Catholic child family for Monday, October 17. Today's program reminds us of the important blessing of close friends at Franklin Avenue, building wise relationships, new law will devoted loving, genuine, true friends do you have these all have a whole lot was one with no lawyer will devoted true genuine friends you have all not talk about casual friendships, casual friendships could be many casual friendships can usually come rather quickly, but real, genuine, loyal, devoted, loving friends do not. Many of those they don't come quickly takes time to build what I want to talk about this message is listed. I will talk about building wise friendships those friendships that make a difference in our life as well as the life of the person who becomes our Prince. I want you to turn to just one single verse in Proverbs chapter 18 the book of Proverbs has a number of things to say about friendships, but also look at this particular verse 24 verses 18 chapter of Proverbs is what the Scripture says, the Bible says that a man let me just say this when the bombs has a man that means mankind man women who ever listen this a man or woman of too many friends comes the usual broker that means it's like to be there. The more friends you have, the better off you have a list of what he says, a man of too many friends comes the ruling, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

There is a friend who sticks closer than even a brother that when he says, a man of too many friends comes the run. What is it me, the word ruling here means to be shaken so badly that you fall to pieces when a person comes the Rhonda shaken so badly by something they dispel the pieces. What he saying is this, that this person who has so many friends that have many friends there friendships are broad but not very deep.

That is when things get rough they get going and so he says when this happens there is no one to depend upon the real genuine anchoring friend to depend upon, and so when the going gets rough. They are gone and so he says the person falls to pieces.

Do you have a friend who will stick by you.

No matter what. I am very grateful that I have a handful of friends who will stick by me no matter what they always agree with me, though they love the year so they loyal, devoted, faithful, true, genuine friends. Yes, and all the difficulties and hardships of our life. These people have stood with me, stood by me no matter what genuine, loving, loyal, devoted friends, and most people cannot find three of those kind of people in their life. That's what I want to talk about in this message and it was the thing for just a moment about this whole idea is certainly God's plan for the life of every single one of us to have genuine intimate friends, maybe not many but at least some close friends. A number of close friends, but those very very few small group that wanted to maybe three. Maybe if you bought that if you can do that genuine intimate friends and I want to talk about what's required to do that and when you think about those kind of friends and you think about what the Lord said when he said it is not good for man to be alone. He intended for us to build to develop to establish to have those kind of relationships that help fill up your life that God certainly can make all of us into one of us is adequate and sufficient within ourselves through himself when he desires. Not that we live's loan ranges, but that we live among friends and have friendships. For example, you can ask the goddess of psychologist the people who are sitting there week after week and month after month you have here listening to people's heart aches and burn the problems in all kind of councils they gonna tell you when the major problems in society today is loneliness. The fact that people do not feel closeness. They don't feel intimacy and they don't have that support, they don't have that undergirding they don't hear that encouragement, they don't feel that love middle since that acceptance there very lonely, they feel shut out and the only way to feel when you feel sure that you also bill shut in. As a result, some people have built their own walls and so when you build a wall around you to shuttle people out. Remember this, you also shut yourself into a very small world is very important that we develop and establish wise friendships. Not just any con but wise friendships now I want you to give you of the 15 chapter 1st Corinthians, because here is a very solemn warning and every parent should say this to their children and say it loud and clear, but this is a principal and a warning that I believe God gives us here in this 15 chapter 1st Corinthians and look if you will a very short verse. The 33rd verse says do not be deceived. Bad company corrupts good models. That is a person who is immoral or has very low ethical standards of who has very little standard is all and whose behavior and conduct is not what it ought to be. He says don't be deceived and what is he saying don't be deceived because many people are said when you know, I know that he is not a Christian or she's not a Christian but they're good people. Or I know that my boyfriend is not a Christian.

He didn't go to church.

He's not been baptized, but I would tell you, young lady, young man, when you say but what you had just confessed.

Is there something wrong with this data. Mom, I don't want to admit it, but something's wrong. He says listen. Do not be deceived. Don't let the devil deceive you into thinking that you can fellowship with that you can build a relationship with someone who is corrupted in their nature and did not affect you because our friendships under shown a few moments have a tremendous impact upon our life but listen to what he says. He says bad company that is you have to decide what is bad company and the question is bad company is anything that would trawl me away from the living God, whom I love and choose the serve and to whom all of us desire to please now what is the impact.

What is the impact of friendships in your life. Friendships can delight us and that is we should all have friendships that delight is that is. We enjoyed being with them. We enjoy fellow shipping with them.

We enjoy going places are. We have the same interest in life and so there's a sense of enjoyment is a sense of pleasure.

That is, every friendships certain ought to delight us because certainly something that we have in common. Some common interest is what brought us together to begin with a second, then use this and that is, those friendships can develop us. That is a good friendship can certainly help us to develop in our life and our personality. We learned of how to get along with people we learn how to give-and-take. We learned how to relate on the more intimate basis because so many people's relationships are very superficial. Are you doing good to see you and I will how are you it's superficial so the surface and there's nothing deep about it and that's why he says a person goat comes the ruin in great times of difficulty.

If all of your friendships of Earth's surface that because you will open your heart to them and so first of all, we said that those relationships will impact us by bringing us a delight.

Sometimes they develop laws and thirdly they drive us you say what you mean a good friendship can drive you and I don't mean driven in the wrong way, but simply this way and that is they highly motivated us when you have the right kind of wise friendship with someone that friendship will probably motivate you, motivate you have motivate you to want to do your best. That is this something about a friendship of close friendship that there encouragement and their commendation is encouraging motivating when they say to you, I just want to know the praying boy today I want to know that I'm going to be thinking about you when you go to that meeting on when you meet this person. When you face there. So when you deal with the situation was going to be tough on your dates this much and am praying for you and let you go do your best and I just want to not even count on me for something very motivating about that and so friendships can do just that they can drive us that likewise friendships can disillusion us that is here, someone that we have had a great friendship when we thought we have believed in them.

The blade denies they been biocide. At times, and then for some reason the other. They had out in the other direction.

Maybe it's because they choose to step away from God.

Maybe some other reason that we see them walk away from ours at a time in her life and we need their loyalty and their faithfulness and their love or just may be that someone has been your friend. They turn on you for some reason and we will always understand why people do that, but sometimes friendships can disillusion us now if you don't respond right you can say well if that's the kind of friend he is. You know what, I'm not trusting anybody else and I think many people have come to those situations in life where they have had broken relationships were there. They don't trust anybody what he could do that, or she could do that. Not opening my heart ever again to anybody on not only my spirit, I'm not going to try to develop new relationships in a range of because you know what you know ever know what paving on the next UK trust people and only will they go sometime those friendships can disillusion us. Not only that they could be worse. Sometimes friendships can bring on great distress.

They can distress us, especially for persons going through difficult hardship and maybe we're going through something and we don't like that person's loving is accepting is encouraging us like we need and so it can become the stressful.

All we see that person violating the word of God walking away from God and you have done your best to help them and encourage them.

Don't do that, you heading in the wrong direction. You're making a mistake and I'm telling you, if you do this you will be sorry you know what the negatives what you say what you do and for those of us who love people and and and want to have relationships. It's very distressing to see someone deliberately walk away that you know they gonna hurt and because of your care for them and love for them. We experience her.

Sometimes it can be distressful then I was say one of the word or two. Avoid one of them is, it can drag us down a relationship or friendship can drag us down, and that is especially if that person is very strong in their convictions and they begin to wonder. They begin to put pressure on you and they begin to try to convince you in persuasion. I think many people who have walked with God have built a relationship with someone and little by little, very little by little over a period of time. Their convictions got whittled away their desires to please God got whittled away and finally they found themselves that because of that relationship and because of the strength of the relationship and the loyalty they felt and the love and acceptance and because they can't seem to do without that friendship, they get drug down the same way they dragged away from their moorings and what happens is that the fellowship in the friendship loses its market loses its real strength, and before long their fellowship in the relationship is broken apart and someone almost destroyed someone else. Which leads me to the last word.

And that's destroy and that is unwise fellowship, unwise relationship unwise companionship on was unwise friendship can absolutely destroy a person's life they can become so distress they can become so disenchanted they can become so depressed in the light because of what's happened in that relationship. They make decisions that absolutely destroy their present life and their future because they couldn't handle what was going on now friendships are extremely important and intimate, loving, loyal, devoted friend, is a tremendous asset. They likewise have great impact upon our life as we take you through those seven words and so when you think about that and your choice of friends now. Likewise, friendships can be extremely rewarding. We say will how how am I rewarded in a friendship.

I think there are lots of ways and first of all if you have a good friendship with someone you feel accepted by them. All of us will feel accepted all of us feel the need of being accepted feel the need of being loved and so acceptance is part of a reward of developing a good friendship. Secondly, there is the whole sense of love.

If you have a good fellowship with someone a good relationship and a good friendship for love that person. Now some people's love for you may be different kinds of love.

It may be the love of about one man for another in the right way.

A godly fashion.

It is love the guy. He does loves you because you have so many things in common. You know how to talk to me to not relate to one another and so you since their love, which is always the extreme encouraging and then certainly one of the rewards building a -wise of friendships is change and that is when you develop a relationship with someone. The real genuine friendship we change when challenged by them. Their challenge by us and so what happens change takes place.

Good change takes place. That's why he says bad company corrupts good morals but when you have good company.

It strengthens the models and strengthens your Barbara internally, it strengthens your convictions. It strengthens your love and devotion for Jesus and for others and what he wants you to do in your life.

Also when the rewards of a good relationship is intimacy and here's what happens. Casual friends can be appealed.

The surface, but intimacy is that degree of friendship that reaches its deepest level. That's the kind of friendship we have very few intimate listen and intimate friendship where you can say anything you want to say to the other person without fear of judgment or condemnation or criticism are suppressed. Couldn't believe such a thing of you, if you have the right kind of friendship, then I can ever say that because you know why they brought a larger imperfect and so they're not disappointed then not hurt then not shamed and I don't walk away then not just look surprised they can say well you know we all go through those things in life and so understand where you are, we go pray through this. I'm a walk we get through this we going to get through this and we don't come out on the side you will be fantastic and all. That's the kind of reward that comes as a result of having that intimacy and then there's fruitfulness. That is when a person develops real godly wise friendships, something happens to their life, they begin to be more productive. They begin to be more fruitful one because they become highly motivated, stimulated, energized, something goes so they have more energy, more excitement, a more fertile about their life there excited about life there happy about life that contend there was something is going on that person's life is absolutely phenomenal. They know that this change this going on this intimacy that's developing this. All of this is doing what causing them to be more productive, more fruitful in their life more enjoyable, easy to get along with everything about the person changing then there is a sense of security. One of the rewards of true, genuine, loving, loyal, devoted friendships, security because all of us are going to go through difficult times in her life and when we do one thing we need. When the storm comes. We need those people who will stand with us who will stand around us who stand in front of us. When the criticism and all the rest, those kind of friends who know where imperfect but their friends genuine friends. There's something very securing about having an intimate relationship with one or more people you know you can depend on. No matter what you may be absolutely dead wrong and then I can tell you that you're right, but they going to say you know what I don't agree with that.

I don't think it's a good idea but I'm going to go with you no matter what has nothing anymore reassuring in life other than the Lord Jesus Christ himself, and I have a godly friend who says I'm going to stand by you.

I'm going to pray for you.

I'm gonna trust the best for you and I'm going to help you everywhere you possibly need help to become the person God wants you to be and to help you walk through this circumstance, the situation your life you have been friends like that is the one of the rewards of real genuine friendship is a sense of security in the time of stone.

Then there is spiritual growth.

When you and I develop wise friendships is what's gonna happen.

We can talk about our mutual interest. Well, when two believers get together once a mutual interest and mutual interest is the things of God and that is who our Lord is and how he operates in her life and how he answers prayer, how he works in life, how he stands is in 6000 prunes as in sculptors doesn't and how he designs their life and how he deepens us and how he uses pain in her sorrow and difficult the trial and tribulation.

How he takes these things the boulders and make as a godly person is he wants us to be what happens in a friendship is that we are able to grow spiritually because having developed that intimacy you can share a heart we can say here's what's good I don't understand what God is doing in my life and oftentimes he will help the other person and he will give them an inside your life to help you understand what you're feeling and why you believe what's going on in your life.

So there are very, very rich rewards in developing wise relationships wise friendships and I will repeat one the greatest asset you not having a life of those devoted, loyal, loving listen, godly friendships that God is placed in our life and they weave cultivating and then we reached out to and God has developed that in their lives and their life together. Thank you for listening to building wise friendships. If you'd like to know more about Charles Stanley were in touch ministries that sign intestate OIG's podcast is a presentation in touch ministries Atlanta, Georgia