Anger and Forgiveness - Part 1

And that's contacted Child and family Monday, October 10 you feeling angry because of the actions of someone who hurt you in today's podcast still discover the only cure for a wounded heart. The series letting go of anger continues. The Bible says he kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven you, but that's not always easy as it and so I want to encourage you to listen very carefully because this message absolutely. If you listen to it by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Change your life but even more than that. I put it like this, it will set you free. Many people are very angry and know it. Many people are very angry and do not know it in the living enslaved by an attitude because you see anger or bitterness, hostility, all of these are very enslaving attitudes and no matter who you are and where you are as long as that's in your life. It's like this caustic poison is leaking through your entire system, and while you may not show it on the outside of the inside it's eating away at you because physically you cannot avoid the consequences of anger somewhat.

You listen carefully for your essay. This is the fourth message in our series on letting go of anger. We talked about the whole idea of how do you know what you're angry and nodded in the consequences and then the third one was about what I want to finish up today and that is how do you handle anger and somebody says what you just asked God to forgive and that's it. No that's not it is not that simple. Sometime it's very difficult and I want to begin with the whole idea of clarifying some meetings.

That is some definitions that is what do we mean if I should ask you will what is forgiveness, you'd say, well, you just don't hold it against the minimal something like that so I want to give you three definitions that I want to encourage you to write down so you can relate to them. Anger is a strong feeling of intense dysplasia, hostility or indignation. As a result of the real or imagined threat or insult, frustration or injustice toward yourself or told someone who's very important to notice. It's a strong feeling of intense dysplasia, hostility, indignation, as result of something you imagine happened to something that happened that's what anger is about. So once forgiveness about well forgiveness.

Watch this carefully. Is that giving up of resentment and rage are part of anger, expressions of anger, the giving up of resentment against someone and our right to get even. No matter what is been done to us. If you don't understand what forgiveness is this saying will make a hold it against them of all your forgiven saying your forgiven and experiencing forgiveness is two different things that giving up of resentment against someone and our right to get even. No matter what has been done to us is the surrendering of my right to hurt you back if you hurt me if I really and truly forgive you. I give up my right to hurt you back to pay you all for what you did to me now.

What is unforgiveness, unforgiveness is the deliberate willful refusal to give up one's resentment and right to get even based on the wrongful thought somebody needs to pay and this is the thing that oftentimes keeps people from being forgiving. Somebody's got a pay is what he did to me is what she did to me is what he did them.

My wife or my husband or my child. Somebody's got to pay unforgiveness demands payment by somebody.

Forgiveness says don't hold against them. That is, I don't hold it over their heads to pay me back for something that happened I watch this is the giving up surrendering what Paul says lay it down but it is not putting aside our right to get even with someone so with those three definitions in mind so that you understand what true forgiveness is what unforgiveness is. There are some obstacles oftentimes to forgiving people.

That is, it isn't always as easy as it sounds. And so what I want us to do is to look at this whole issue of how do we handle this matter of anger in our life and what do we do about so there are some situations and some attitudes that make it very difficult and that one of them is this is first of all, one of the obstacles, the forgiveness is wanting to forgive somebody listen once you really and truly want to forgive.

You can, but it's an obstacle until you do a second obstacle is this, and that is rehearsing whatever they did to you and you know there people you hear them they'll say let me tell you what so-and-so did they tell him they tell her in two weeks later they're still telling it months later they're still telling years later people are still talking about what so-and-so did to them. And the truth is rehearsing it is a hindrance to forgiving and then of course the whole issue is pride. If anybody needs to go to anybody they should come to me. Not me. Go to them so pride oftentimes is a major issue, keeping us from being forgiving in her life and then sometimes fear.

Fear of what will fear they'll take advantage of if I go tell them that I'm asking them to forgive me for something or they'll reject me or I'll look like I'm just being weak and so are with those attitudes are a person is not more than likely going to do it and them when you think about somebody says well you know they'll misunderstand all of these are excuses for not dealing with the issue you may be misunderstood. You may feel rejected. You may be rejected.

You may feel we can all these things may be true but all these will keep you from being liberated. What we are talking about is freedom from the enslavement of anger, hostility, bitterness, resentment, all the things that happen, the person's life when their unforgiving and so this will keep you from being forgiven if you are not careful. Then of course you always get negative advice will devour you here is what I would do. I would go to them. I just want to oftentimes your so-called friends, listen, they sometimes want to protect you want to defend you but sometimes friendly advice is not godly advice.

You have to discern between the two.

What you don't need to do thus and so when the truth is that exactly what God wants you to do and then of course there is partial forgiveness and that is a look I can forgive him for this and this and this. But not that partial forgiveness is like partial obedience.

Partial obedience or disobedience and partial forgiveness is unforgiveness.

And so things that people think such as these, oftentimes keep them from seeking forgiveness and working things out in her life and then somebody's is like just don't feel like what if you wait till you feel like forgiving somebody who's hurt you more than likely you're not gonna do it. And then of course the whole issue is I tried it didn't work are how long is it going taken so what they want oftentimes is they will be able to say what I forgive you and that's it. That settles it. It's one thing to say it is something else to experience it in your heart and so as you think about some of these, you might ask yourself is that my attitude is that the way I feel and then one of the things that a person will do oftentimes to avoid genuinely forgiving is this bill. Think about the situation. What that person's head of what they did though say well they probably didn't mean that it was probably a mistake and so if you tried to justify somebody else is wrong to you in order to not face forgiveness than what you do you still enslaved by an unforgiving spirit telling him to show you in a moment. Unforgiveness is a very, very critical, dangerous thing. Not only does it affect all your relationships that you physically, but listen to this passage of Scripture and I would like you to do is likely to turn to Matthew chapter 6 you've read the Lord's prayer amendment times.

I'm sure Liz that's the pattern prayer really this six chapter of Matthew, I want you look at this for a moment Jesus has just talked about how to pray and is giving them the pattern that our father who art in heaven, and so he comes down to the last part and it says and forgive us our debts or at trespasses so our sins against others. As we also have forgiven our debtors at trespasses and do not lead us in the temptation, but deliver us from evil. For yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. Then he says watch this carefully. This is a conditional sentence for if you forgive others for their transgressions toward you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others.

Then your Father will not forgive your transgressions that makes this one of the most critical statements in the Bible. If you forgive those who wrong you the father will forgive you if you refuse to forgive those who wrong you the father will refuse to forgive you, else clarify something. This is not referring to salvation. The Bible says in Ephesians chapter 289 that, for by grace you been saved through faith that not of yourselves, it is a gift of God not of works lest any man should boast. And so we not talk about salvation were talking about our spirit toward someone else, our willingness to forgive someone else for what they've done. And so what Jesus is saying here is this that my unwillingness to forgive someone else.

My refusal to let go. My refusal to lay it all down places me in a position whether heavenly father will not forgive me of my sin.

This has nothing to the salvation has to do with your daily walk, salvation's acetylation that think about this for a moment because people read this and they just read rhetoric.

This could be any clearer.

For if you forgive others for their transgressions toward you, your heavenly father will forgive you if if is a conditional thing. But if you do not forgive others than your father will not forgive your transgressions that is that serious or is it not his.

What it means. If the father is not forgiving toward me for something that's going on inside of me that means my relationship with him is not right and that is the sin and living in willful known sin is a condition God will not answer our prayer it. Watch this if he dared he would be condoning sin agreeing with sin, which would be out of his character.

I don't think people realize how absolutely critical it is to have a forgiving spirit because it affects every aspect of your life and I think one of the reasons many people are not blessed in their life is because they have anger. They have hostility, something happened. Maybe way back yonder or maybe yesterday and you just can't forgive, they don't deserve it. This is what they didn't and they deserve the field of the blood of this phenomenon you all you doing is causing yourself pain unforgiveness like a boomerang. It comes back to you and you're the one who works unforgiveness is a critical detrimental destructive attitude that absolutely will destroy your life and separates you in your fellowship with God separates you in your fellowship, not your relationship is say once you say so we need to be very careful about how we think about what Jesus said because we always look at that prayer and think that's just wonderful. But here's what he says.

He says if you don't forgive your brother if you don't forgive others.

The father will not forgive you. And so we not talk about salvation were talking about our spirit toward someone else, our willingness to forgive someone else for what they've done. Now turn to the 18 chapter of Matthew, and that here Peter deals with the whole thing 18 chapter beginning in the 21st verse is not what he says. Then Peter came and said to Jesus, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him up to seven times. Now Peter thought he was being pretty good at this point because the rabbis said three times. Subpoena thoughtful heartbeat that what about lords by forgive them seven times. How does that sound well he got a little jolt because Jesus said, I sent you 70×7. Mohammed, is that 490 you've turned about and how many times you count them up. So let me ask you this. How many times have you sinned against God, 400 and 440.

Why did Jesus say 70×7. He had a very specific reason the site and he didn't mean 400 9010. What did he mean his raiment Peter on not giving you a measuring rod so you can decide how long you can be forgiving or unforgiving because by the time you reached 400 you forgotten all about how many it is in fact most of us went out many times ago and all of us would have to fall the category got.

I can't count how many times you had to forgive me for some so what was he saying Peter, there's no end of forgiveness 70×7. We think about seven make a complete number and he reason he said 70×7. Is Peter not giving a measuring rod because there is no limit to forgiveness. You may not like somebody but forgiveness and liking them is two different things. Then what he did he settle this by giving him a parable and I will read adultery, but do so to give you an idea what he say in the 23rd verse Jesus said after having said that though this reason, the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. Now put in modern terms. So here's what happens. This man owes his employer $10,000 and so he calls for the debt to be paid and so the man says I can't pay it. You know, give adhesives, please be patient with me. I can't pay it now but I will. And so the employer says okay I'm going to be compassion to you and the I'm going to forgive you. So this man goes out and somebody owes him $100 versus $10 and he finds the guy that owes him $100 and he says then you need to pay up pieces like a pair throw him and his family in prison. There was whatever's necessary, just do whatever is knows that he can't pay the man said please be patient with me, which is what he said but now he's unwilling to do that and so here's what Jesus said then summoning him, his Lord said to him, you wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me should you not have also had mercy on your fellow slave in the same way that I've had mercy on you and is Lord, moved with anger, handed them over to the torturers until he should pay repay all that was owed to my heavenly father will also do the same to you.

If each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart not from your lips, but from your heart. Now that's a very strong visitor.

A parable is a truth is a principal and so think about what Jesus said.

He said I forgive you for all the things that you have done to me your 400 $0.91 against this man's one sin and you won't forgiving you see the truth is you and I have no justifiable reason not one for not forgiving others for what they've done to us or what they will do. There's no justifiable reason: the Scripture not want. He did say except if and but when he said you forgive father forgives you, you don't forgive others in forgive you this man mistreated his slave and would not forgive him. And Jesus said in this parable sinned into the torturers for him to pay and what he was simply saying this is a very dangerous thing for a person not to be forgiving and I think we we handle it rather lightly and we say we are forgiven. Listen to me again forgiveness from the lips can be meaningless unless that forgiveness is a true, genuine expression of the heart and I'm fully convinced that many, many people are suffering there suffering in their finances, their suffering and the relationships there is suffering on the job there suffering in their home and with the children you, you name it.

Unforgiveness is the divider unforgiveness. By its nature is the destroyer. It is an in slaver and sometimes people never deal with it. They don't want to because they say it was so unfair. I did this I did that and look what they did to make God doesn't expect me God expects me to forgive. It may take me a little while. He expects me to forgive. He will enable us to forgive no matter what. What did he say if I'm not willing to forgive then what happens is he's not going to forgive me. That is, I can't be in a right relationship with Jesus Christ and have an unforgiving spirit told anybody no matter what's going on in the same old thing comes up, but if you only knew.

I met a lot of people there a lot of things in life spends enough amount of the note. Yes, you can thank you for listening to anger, and forgiveness. If you like to know more about Charles Stanley or intense ministries, intense data lighting. After the presentation, intense ministries in Atlanta, Georgia