"We have Met The Enemy ...and He is Us!

This is I am birth this is the nation's number one show for you as a family. Those you knowingly and willingly volunteered between of all the lovely worst disaster. How are you feeling doing. How's that working for you what's going on.

Are you heading into feeling overwhelmed. Are you struggling are you trying to catch your breath. All those things we talk about on this show because it is the show for you as a caregiver. There is no other like it is unrepeatable. Speaking of unrepeatable all of you lovely bees the barren of the board's assault of the cell is the role of engineering. He's the man who's never been impeached. He is John Butler the Celt of muddy disco everyone well okay so there their background check. Please don't which was by the by the way, not required for this gig back. It was discouraged if you would be on the show 877-655-6755 877-655-6755 is the number caller lab, John always gives us a dad joke. I hope you have one ready in case you don't, I've got one for you all well you know I'm going to deny you that particular pleasure because I have one loaded and ready for bears go ahead write.

What do you know why dear Peter, you know why elephants get you why. Okay so elephants right away never see them hiding in trees. So good at Python schedule right where it was about how to hide it was. This was not one of more well-known ones but there is to teach you how to hide it was set up as instructional video and they show this field where there's just a single bush in the middle of the field and they say this is Mr. so-and-so from Glastonbury and he is showing us how to hide. He has picked a good high yes very obviously blow it out as sound effects. It's terrible but so good at it, Peter. I will I get one for you and they will ground with the Mattapan for caregivers. We just last night will write what you know that's part of the big deal about this show is that we we talk we talk about things that are necessary for caregivers and one of those things that is really essential for human life in general. Later caregiver not is the ability to laugh and find anything, just in showing others a new band out home now is cultivate no they had called thousand and 23 MB, but they haven't gotten gig yet you that's a fair that specific that's just what you know because you can't really say your target your homework anymore right because it's all digital. That's the thing I and I all you can because mean he did take a megabyte out right 65 555 if you will. Part of the show. I John I've been thinking my and been thinking about what makes your show different. What what is it about hope for the caregiver what what you talk about what's going on what it some the things that I was think about that and then I had a reporter asked me a while back doing a story on me and they said, what is the biggest challenge you faced as a caregiver and and you look at the inventory of my journey as a caregiver, and you're looking at. Gracie has 80 surgeries both of her legs amputated hundred doctors, 12 hospital seven. Insurance companies $11 million and its ongoing we were just over at the process this week. She's going have to get a new socket for her leg.

It's not something sclerotic at it a wound on her honor. Limb amputated limb and is just there's just constant stuff. She lived with chronic pain there's there's cooking, there's cleaning. There's laundry, there's groceries. There's enough light tigers and bears oh my and and there's all the sinks and and yet I had to stop short and what you have been asked is that what's the hardest part of what's the biggest part of that was the hardest chemistry and I and I was able to answer with with extreme clarity.

Knowing what is mine and what is not mine to carry. That's the hardest thing for me is a caregiver because those lines get very blurred. I'm overreaching over expecting I want more I I don't want this.

I I feel resentment. Because of this, I was taken some calls. The other day on the Saturday show.

We do, and I started to see a pattern for so many the callers that we get in so many of the people interact with the caregiver in the in my own life and I think I've kind of luck to you and that one of the common denominators for denominators for all of us caregivers. Is this word resentment and ice ice and I'm just I've spent a lot of time pondering on this and you know the date Sybil what what is different about you show because I don't really get into the logistics of caregiving. You know that none of that we don't help you how to dress to care. Give rhino you know you won't because each situation being different and you know the best way to do that for your love, brightening world could I have the chutzpah to come into your life and tell you how to take care your love one anymore, and you can do with but and ask because my name is just right. I like to throw in Yiddish words. Every thought, yeah exactly what's on your schlep all you but I was think about that and I thought okay that brings me to my caregiver tip of the day & the fall man nice and is on it like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat all it is the day is coming. It's it's an admonition type of ship it's not a you say out. That's about a five dollar word that's good. Yeah, yeah, okay, I give that you can't push a wheelchair with clinched fist.

You can't push a wheelchair with clinched fist and I thought about that for us is caregivers because I think so many of us struggle with this resentment term and I want to unpack this exit and if this is something you're going through right now if you want to just you want to just come and get it out on the table and talk about it with no federal caregiver and and and just hang out with it. 877-655-6755 or love. You know, yeah, and that's what we will see there's a caregiver out there. We deal with resentment as just humans in relationships.

And as we talked about on the show. There's nothing super special about the message that were giving like to caregivers. It's that these are things that people deal with all the time that are not caregivers but caregivers do with them and everything is cranked up to 11.

It's just the worst thing every everything is so is it really is and it it's and I think the the and I think that's the key is that that we don't deal with anything that's that much different from anybody else is forced conceptually wise principal was preset wise we deal with things that that everybody deals with what we deal with mononuclear level and and what is made by show different in my message different from I think anything else I've heard that they're not. I've got another looking casino IR a caregiver right now and you need it. You need to find a show before you did the ship, but I took a king to come up yeah I had wanted it were in the season of Epiphany is January 6 was right forever. Yeah, what kind of town where were Epiphany, Circus Circus, Epiphany, but it's I came to this of this understanding that the real battle for caregiver. It is the key. What is the real battle and I think that so many of us look at the external is a real battle. If you look at if you look at the things that are going on in our country and if you look at Rush Limbaugh for example number one radio host in the world you in order to be successful this. You got to have an enemy an enemy for Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity. These guys are his liberalism. That's the enemy. The enemy for Dave Ramsey's debt. That's the enemy. The enemy for the Democrat party is the Republican Party to change for you.

I want to change it. Oil actually the foil adversary yes yes this is the delivery constantly. Yeah, you got to constantly engage your audience in help them fight this common adversary right because you talk about this on the show before it like it's not about they are there, it's don't go there in the will and are okay here is the foil for what is well is caregivers. It's a little bit more than that.

In our case we can't point to a geographical thing I was thinking about the wars and so forth. When when when we were fighting in World War II. We knew where the enemy was.

We knew who the enemy was the when he got to Korea and then he got to Vietnam and now Afghanistan. All that he gets a little bit murky, so it's hard to know where where's the enemy who is the enemy here for us is caregivers host the enemy and it turns out just what we have met the enemy and it is it is us and that ran in it were talk about. I am my own worst enemy. Gracie and all of her physical challenge and so forth is not my enemy. Her condition is not my enemy that these are challenges that we have to face in this world that we live in is caregivers but Alzheimer's is not my enemy Parkinson's is not my enemy or your enemy.

These are also things that are way beyond us to be able to fight the enemy is is if you if you go to start looking at diseases and afflictions and things that are bad as your enemy, then you're going to end up being just spent and and overwhelmed by this because life is full of those things into easy trap to fall into. We had a caller couple weeks ago that was dealing with a bipolar husband and that is a particular and I have a friend who do without for many years and it is a good she married very young and this end up being just really resentful sort of thing and end at but but bipolar disorder was not her enemy.

It was the you know the way she dealt with it and the things internally with her that were the enemy and came through that yeah, these afflictions expose the enemy yeah and there you go and and and and we find that it's us that we cannot fight things that are beyond us to fight. And yet we think that we can, or at least III spent a lifetime of that and that's I goes back to that question with reportable – and what your biggest challenge I am my biggest challenge. Knowing what is mine to fight was not meant fight knowing what is mine and what is not mine and I struggle with this mightily and I talked to enough caregivers have learned they do to you know that they that my fellow caregivers that and in you enough talked about this week.

We struggle with okay what is mine and what is not you. You've expressed the same sentiment that is this mod to fix.

Is this a concern or is this a responsibility what you know where to host a difference between those two things is crucial to what we like.

It's a concern or a responsibility and so I I've come to this understanding that resentment which is our reaction or response to unmet expectations becomes a critical battlefield for us is caregivers. This is where we engage the enemy. And guess what, it is our own. It is, it is us is me. I am my enemy in this regards so I can't build a coalition to fight me what I have to do it. Learn to do is be at peace with certain things.

Learn to let go of certain things learned not to fight certain things and accept what is accepting reality is extremely difficult for us is caregivers. It really is to talk about that some or 877-655-6755 877-655-6755. This is hope caregiver murder will you ever struggled to trust God when lousy things happen to you. I'm Gracie Rosenberger in 1983 I experienced a horrific car accident leading 80 surgeries in both legs and became I questioned why God allowed something so brutal to happen to me. But over time the questions changed and I discovered courage to trust God that understanding along with an appreciation for quality prosthetic limbs led me to establish standing with help more than a dozen years we been working with the government of Ghana and West Africa, equipping and training local workers to build and maintain quality prosthetic limbs for their own people on a regular basis. We purchased ship equipment and supplies and with the help of inmates in a Tennessee prison. We also recycle parts from donated lambs. All of this is to point others to Christ. The source of my help and strength, please visit standing with help.com to learn more and participate in lifting others that standing with them.com.

I'm Gracie. I am staining with help as a caregiver. Think about all the legal documents you need power of attorney will, living wills, and so many more than about such things as disputes about medical bills.

What if instead of shelling out hefty fees for a few days of legal help paid a monthly membership and got a law firm for life while we are taking legal representation and making some revisions in the form of accessible, affordable, full-service coverage. Finally, you can live life know you have a lawyer in your back pocket who at the same time is an empty it's called legal shield and its practical, affordable and a must for the family caregiver visit caregiver legal.com that's caregiver legal.com. Isn't it about time someone started advocating for you www.dotcaregiverlegal.com on independent associate caregiver. This is murder. This is the nation's number one show for you as a family live on Sirius XM 131 family talk channel you will be part of the show 877-655-6755 877-655-6755. That is my wife Gracie with John Erickson taught him that Andre Crouch classic.

Through it all, but a tremendous arrangement they did of the song just was throw stuff for new records resilient and you can go out to hope for the caregiver.com and see and see how you can get that today they were talking about you with the Count of Monte disco himself am drinking out of my brand-new mug that I got up having some hot chocolate get snow coming at all.

Here in Montana job. It's been snowing all day long we are experiencing a little bit of Indian summer right now here in Nashville because you've course are in Montana drinking out of your band plastic mug this is. I didn't hire me. Yesterday the Babylon be the sedative. What about favorite publications in their motto is not all that you read the back of it. Fake news you can trust that the fantastic hide. I I love a good I love it. A well turned phrase like no business and they are so good at it there so they really that was very grateful that they they sent out an excellently distant of the subscriber, but I may write, write what you have a special subscriber you been contributing or submitting things as I write. I do my go of the been published in USA Today and web MD the Chicago Tribune, Fox news guidepost always others.

But when I get published in the Babylon be, then I will have arrived. You will know then you will feel confident like phoning up we are now that's a level of confidence I'm looking for to have yet that's what you can phone up. Weird Al would like. No reservations.

You're not really experiencing a lot of resentment in your life and that's what we talk about for diggers of these is this this issue of resentment and I think that I was talking my father about this by dad's a wonderful ministry meeting on the show. He has these are wise wise wise man wise man, and he said it hold up. He said hold up both your hands and and I said okay and he said on one side, one hand is rejection in the other hand, is resentment. And most people live in between those two hands and I told you he's wise man as Roscoe, that's it, but it is obviously it he ease been ordained now for six almost 60 years as a minister and he has spent the better part of his entire ministry between those two hands with people and in dealing with rejection and dealing with resentment and and I think that when you are a caregiver for someone you're not your everybody deals with this everybody deals with, but other people have a lot of other people have time. The episode ends. There is no longer the acute episodic event happening rightly think the ink will dry on the divorce papers the grass will grow on the grave and the wound will heal from surgery, but when you're caregiver for chronic impairment. It's relentless. It doesn't go away and not overlooking your you you look at this this journey and you realize it can be decades, and for me it has been exactly in the resentment can be mass or compartmentalize with time.

We can cut us stuff that a little bit. You can callous over that mouse, you can dress it up yet dress it up a little bit but when you're caregiver you're in the cute, in particular when you're dealing with things there really chronic and suffering others. There's chronic issues going on.

Gracie is in pain every single day there's there's chronic crises going on on a regular basis. Not every caregiver deals with that. For example, right and you will some some people that are doing with things that have kinda plateaued and everything's just kind of pretty much dealing with some sort of cyclic thing like what I mentioned earlier, which is quite something like bipolar disorder or send you something like that. Like like so many times, everything will be fine and they'll feel like you can take a break and then Vince then then then the whole thing explodes right right right well then you didn't go to the energy you go get your brake pads. Change you realize, oh no my transmissions out at our place that that's another to grand you know will inwardly when the thing with the thing continues to be a source of angst and suffering and challenges in heartache and grief in all those kinds of things.

There's this there's this reality that we start to form in our mind. Like limited. This is it fair I didn't sign up for this. I don't want this. This is not what I thought I was getting into. I do have a favorite book of the Bible. Joe may not seem fair to the a lot of things may not be fair, I get that it may not be what you thought you were signing up for, but in reality it is what you signed up for it if you married someone is exactly what you set up for.

If you bring a child in the world. This is exactly what you signed up for to bring this tell the world nothing is going to be perfect, but it doesn't mean that you have to be miserable and when week and resentment comes from a place of entitlement.

I deserve this. I want this. I I'm I deserve this I guess is the best word right we talk about the list is longer to me except that like I can expectation reality and the expectation is this is owed to me this is reality is that many not be owed to you. It may or may not, even if it is owed to you. It may not. It may not, and in what what exactly is owed to me means that that that that becomes sought of him unpacking this little bit.

I want to stay with me as caregivers because I don't want to do. I don't want to bring you down with it. But I want us to understand what the real battle is because sometimes we put our loved ones face over our real enemy. Sometimes we put our family members face over our real enemies like that I can do to show to show you but we need to take those mask often see the enemy for what it is that we can better deal with this and we can learn to be content we can.

Not easy.

But what is this Peter Rosenberg is hope for the caregiver 877-655-6755 caregiver here 776-5567 55 877-655-6755 I am with it is always himself the barrel of the board. The count of muddy disco John Butler were having a robust discussion on what exactly is the enemy for us as a caregiver exactly it went where's the battlefield who is this this nefarious nebulous individual that were fighting and I'm 34 years in my journey as a caregiver and I have come to discover this is who was" source that quote that I have met the enemy, no. I was actually I know it's not this guy, but I was looking up I Peter can see me because were on FaceTime right now so I he sees me with my phone out and what I'm looking out in your sleeping now. Only now I hope by but I was looking up quotes from one of my favorite songs to soothe the art of war. Art of war as a him and okay so I I've been reading Sun Tzu and I did that a while ago, but right now I've been reading the meditations of Marcus really and I can't recommend enough. It's completely off-topic doing and how they hop your way beyond mere yeah man hey Calvin and Hobbes is the height of of like bike deep thinking and really important things that we need to be aware of bids for you. I know will you actually was not spaceman six but I was also looking up gadgets that's a different thing I know, but I was looking at stuff about about the enemy and the like.

The Supreme Court of war is to subdue the enemy without even fighting that sort of thing and were worth.

I haven't thought this through very much in this context, but the way you put this as as far as identifying the enemy and I want to say it was from World War II that your porn quote yet. We have met the enemy and he is he is us and I don't know will give you some of the calling with that look. I carry I carry this this box in my pocket that has some knowledge of the world just on it and I can click around and and yet we learn at the alley and he is us.

You will the point of all of this is that if it and this is what would I go back to what this reporter asked me about her show everything else is that I go at this thing from a different perspective for my fellow caregivers and myself. And remember, I don't love anything out you all that I am not struggling with working through and tried to only process in my own life.

I don't write because the show is not for everyone else. It's for Peter by the parents about my guys can't help them out.

So I but I was think about this. What why we do the show the way we do it. I have come to this conviction.

This is not a opinion, this is a conviction of mine that the real problem for caregivers is in the heart and our hearts are often train wrecks and if our heart is is a mess. If it's a dumpster fire, then guess what the rest of us will eventually be as well our wallets, our jobs are marriages or relationships or for every emotion you have lower physical bodies be a mess me that's one of the landmines in my book 7 caregiver landmines is this excessive weight gain and the weight that we gain in our body is a direct correlation to the weight that surrounded her heart and the weight that surround our heart is often fueled by resentment and I I wanted to just unpack that little bit because I think what happens is is that we are broken people and resentment becomes our opioid to avoid having to feel some of the things we don't want to grieve through or or let go of her so forth and so we keep wearing resentment patches on this because it makes us feel stronger than we really are and will is so so if you're so good to feet is a delicious, righteous sin.

Yeah, delicious, and to feel righteous about some something or someone, or some situation has done this to me and we feel wrong, like the wrong the more evil the situation is and the more egregious the violation on our person that makes that debt them in our minds can correlate to just turn into what clearly we are on the side of good and righteousness.

We have been unjustly persecuted in the right and animal end. And someday my goal for myself and my fellow caregivers is that one day we stand at a great that's the first goals that we actually make it there to the strength of our left we don't want them to have a living out of sight yet that's all reality I get it yet that we don't stand there with Clint's fist at ourselves at our loved ones and God family and friends, and God and in the thing is is that we can easily do that and in the journey for caregivers and write this down every was was just right. If you're if you're driving a car just trying to get the podcast will be out of the podcast yeah it caregiver podcast.com over just go to the goat… It will be there but but here's the deal. Write this down your challenges as a caregiver. Do not stop at the grave. Okay, they are not stop there you go to process what happened to you as a caregiver long after your Loveland has died, a promise you this. This will happen but you don't have to be miserable about it. That's a choice.

Misery is a choice acceptance is also a choice and asked I would only ally is the I would say that not just acceptances chose a choice, but growth growth is a choice and and I and I am if you allow me to swerve just to hear just I will tame gently touching a man you could get an end of metal and look at our country right now we are having a convulsion over one particular group that is not willing to accept a certain reality. Whether you like the manner, not man, is president and one particular group has struggled to accept that from the moment it happened and look at the convulsion you think that's a problem. Guess what, there's more coming.

If you're a caregiver or or even if you're not you give this point there convulsions that are waiting to happen to you and this could happen to our country as we get this aging baby boomer population that really hasn't quite landed full throttle yet it's coming and we get special needs children and then we got all the other normal sicknesses. We got alcohol as we got drug it we got all these things going on and you won't think there's a convulsion in the halls of Congress, wait till the convulsion hits with these things. Yeah, and I like that in that yes there are so many things going on politically and we we get so towards about everything and it's so it's so important to all of us because it is important, not diminishing that in the slightest, but these are kinda symptoms of really accelerating society.

Think about how you know even just things like your technology has accelerated over the past 20 years. I'm I haven't said this on the shelf. I'm 38 years old right right yet I so's will and I I but I've I've lived through some of the realities while I noticed about why yet that's that's a different story for a different time, but just the technological advancements that happened during my short short time I have a 12-year-old daughter who knows everything about technology and and yet you this this it's it's it's it's advanced so much in that time and all of those things that we that we deal with all of the trend that the vast transitions that we deal with our our representative in our our politics and and things like that. But think about how much that is going to affect not just politics but every aspect of the way that we live his people and caregivers are.

It's all here held all the pieces are there and in if you want to see a glimpse into the reality of a caregivers life every day. Watch the impeachment hearing go back and just watch it start to finish because that's the reality is that I have no desire to positive that again, but that level of dysfunction and denial, and in justification and resentment and all these kinds of things that are coming out you could just see what happens to this is the human condition when things happen that we don't like we don't want. We don't feel like a right we become indignant and then it we allowed to become resentful to us. We got to call real quick here but anyway, before I get to the colony. Just finish this one thought with caregivers. But you know what it doesn't have to be this way you are not in bondage to it. You can learn to be peaceful in the midst of this think Elijah was chased by Jezebel.

Eddie fell asleep and took a nap.

Jesus fell asleep in the boat. He took a nap in order to be peaceful. Daniel slept in the lines. Then there is a biblical precedent for sleeping in the midst of crisis and resting, and we can do that.

I Lesko Trinity of South Carolina how you doing I'm doing excellent and first off, I wanted tell you who did that quote oh I actually look this up Trinity but I'm a let you have this because it is beautiful.

I like that is eight hours yeah John and I now live in and I :-) whiplash with what I would've the quote: we have met the enemy and he is us. Yet American naval officer Oliver hazard Perry in 1813, Commodore Perry, absolutely. I elevate these well but all of the real quote as well go with what we did. The real quote we have met the enemy and he is ours, yet I got I got the context wrong and to the content as we can be and we own the enemy is as far as a conquest, but that I'd miss misquoted by saying we have met yet is hard to she's talking about history's got the right, as usual, I think that when you're trying to there's culture now and I'm still recovering from my injury, I watch too much TV in the current push on and is get what you deserve and I don't know what if you are a loved one has experienced the symptoms of mesothelioma, you may be entitled to financial compensation deserve what I deserve what what I think I deserve all kinds of and so I know caregivers are sitting around watching TV, but it might be on and there hearing this message repeatedly, even if they're not consciously hearing it in a tent city is Ruddy Dangerfield said that he's with the godly till we got it deserve a break, but I so much because there is that since of your entitled, you're entitled, you're entitled and if somebody says that your title doesn't necessarily mean that you are number one and and and I think that there's this this in the resentments come from this entitlement mentality that we get that you know we deserve better than this, and we may deserve better than this. It may be, but it may be also delayed for a season, and there may be something going on that is that his soul enriching and joyful and deeply meaningful in the midst of it that were so busy trying to avoid because it's a little bit of work and it's a lot of pain and dynamics going on but anyway I want to take up much of your time but no right to the occasion on research exactly our series.

Why was of this is that something else I was thinking about that. I believe I the past months or whatever it is that there is a thing about risk that we don't like we want like them and that's what you're talking about time dipping the political right. We want all of the rewards with none of the risk. It doesn't happen that way for us is caregivers is a peaceful contentment and joyful life. No matter what's going on around that's the report. Can we get there. Yeah, we can do we have to let go of some of the things yes we do we have to let go.

I can't play the piano with clicks for to make good music and let go of this hope for the caregiver. This is the show for you as a family caregiver will be like as a caregiver.

Think about all the legal documents you need power of attorney will, living wills, and so many more then think about such things as disputes about medical bills. What if instead of shelling out hefty fees for a few days of legal help paid a monthly membership and got a law firm for life while we're taking legal representation and making some revisions in the form of accessible, affordable, full-service coverage.

Finally, you can live life know you have a lawyer in your back pocket who at the same time is an empty it's called legal shield and its practical, affordable and a must for the family caregiver visit caregiver legal.com that's caregiver legal.com. Isn't it about time someone started advocating for you www.dotcaregiver.com on independent associate. Have you ever struggled to trust God when lousy things happen to you. I'm Gracie Rosenberger in 1983 I experienced a horrific car accident leading 80 surgeries in both legs and became I questioned why God allowed something so brittle to happen to me. But over time the questions changed and I discovered courage to trust God that understanding along with an appreciation for quality prosthetic limbs led me to establish standing with help more than a dozen years we been working with the government of Ghana and West Africa, equipping and training local workers to build and maintain quality prosthetic limbs for their own people on a regular basis. We purchased ship equipment and supplies and with the help of inmates in Tennessee prison. We also recycle parts from donated lambs. All this is to point others to Christ. The source of my help and strength, please visit standing with help.com to learn more and participate in lifting others that standing without.com. I'm Gracie. I am staining with help and hope to hear family talk to 131 Malloy grade must have gospel recording order for us to have a love that reportedly did suffer for new record, resilient, and you can get a copy of that to the house very easy go out to hope for the caregiver.calm hope for the caregiver.com and you see words you picture Gracie's new record and you will also see a little bit more about the organization that sponsors all of this for this whole show was called staining with hope and is the presenting sponsor of the whole show stay with hope has two program outreaches for the wounded and those who care for them for the wounded is for Gracie's fellow amputees. My wife give up both of her legs. As result of this wreck. She had back in 83 and she said she wanted to create a mechanism to provide quality prosthetic limbs to her fellow amputees. So we do that we do that with the help of the inmates of Tennessee prison run by core civic one of their many faith-based programs and they have prison segments all across the country and this one with the inmates coming in. They help us recycle prosthetic limbs. We collect used limbs from all of the country go to this prison in the inmates disassembled the force so that we can take the parts the feet.

The pile on the knees screws the adapter's connectors all the Stuff and we can ship it over to West Africa to the Republic of Ghana. We been working there for 15 years and were going back. John, I have this summer ship going out this this month the right right yet is how it will with this this summer, and day were to take a trip over there were taking her that is it above or below the equator. It's it's 90 miles north of the city of Accra is it's it's right there baby is okay III haven't said this before but I do want to take a quick mention that this is something that really pleases me about the program that you're talking about is it is proof that those who are marginalized and imprisoned are not any different from any of us sometimes just a different wardrobe. Yeah, just different wardrobe and ideally a little empathy and compassion can go a really long way because you are there but for the grace of God's will and and you know what I have an end when I go over there to see the guys I will hear back repeatedly in a house Gracie were praying for her.

These are inmates that are praying for my wife these of these are meaningful things and you having hired now. This is like just consider that next time you encounter some slides and they have core civic has great programs to help transition them out content go to core civic.com if your employer that needs some some good workers to come in who deserve a chance. They really do. They've earned the work in the legs for people in West Africa think they don't get to work in the shop unless they've earned the right to be around tools and things such as that exactly exact and so yeah give them a short work of having the the the head chaplain for all of core civic for the dozens and dozens and dozens of prisons to be on the show really talk about some of these programs coming up. Hopefully this month and it's it's a great program to do that with people and so for the wounded and those who care for them and that's what the show is the for the wounded of those who care for. That's all about standing with hope and if you want to stand with hope today in you click on the link there with Gracie's records go to the giving page for whatever amount, whatever is on your heart will send you Gracie CD. It's a great memory tax deductible amount. Whatever Texas will send you Gracie CD that I think you'll like it anywhere want to wrap up this discussion about resentment because I think and it will circle back to this we were going to come back to this is that it's a perennial theme. Yeah, yes, and end it is so easy for us to to feel a sense of entitlement and then discouragement, which leads to this resentment went when we have unmet expectations. I get that been there done that got the T-shirt. When we trust God with the circumstances were in it's okay this is where I am. I'm going to accept this reality. I'm not going to fight against it. I'm not about to put my enemies mask on other people I'm stuck in a do that I'm going to learn to be content in this.

I will accept this for what it is. Reality is a tough companion, but it is an honest friend. Okay, if you can. If we could just hang onto that thought and realize I'm not the fight gets however hateful it may be go back and read Eli Viso go back and read Victor Frankel if you want to see people learning to be at peace in the midst of a nightmare.

The Holocaust and so forth.

Go back and look at Corrie 10 boom and Betsy tendon in the hiding place. There are lots of hateful realities in this world but hateful realities do not necessarily mean we have to become hateful people we just don't. My wife lives with more pain that I've seen anybody endure and she's in her 37th year of this. This is a this is a tough place for her and her body is just broken orthopedically. She's a train wreck which is not hateful. She's not mean-spirited she's not bitter.

I think we spent so much time trying to feel better that we missed the opportunity to be better in the midst of this, and I watch Gracie to leave this wicket were up against the club. I will leave you with this picture.

After her second amputation. This was way back in 1995 she told her surgeon what you gotta take it off. This legacy is killing me. She'd Artie got to the first four years earlier, and so much of what she deals with today as it is is result of us trying to stave off amputation and finally Gracie just put the kibosh on all of it and said look, I'm getting rid of these legs are killing me. I don't know what's on the other side of the operating room door, but I can't live like this anymore and I'm gonna trust who's on the other side of the operating door. She give up her leg and she came out of surgery. I'll never forget this. I saw her coming out of surgery with her laying on a gurney half anesthetized both legs gone.

One of them is now in brand-new bloodied bandage with tubes and everything else and she had her hands lifted to heaven laying flat on her back, lifting his David singing in that amazing voice reversing praise God from whom all blessings flow. What does she know that I need to know what the she know maybe you need we don't have to feel better in order to be better. We can let go of some this resentment will talk about this tomorrow and show you get the book.

Also as well for the caregivers all@caregiver.com healthcare today's a great day starting health of Petersburg scene actually