Giving Your Child a Love for Adventure

Build your child's faith with clubhouse junior and clubhouse magazines from Focus on the Family boys and girls ages 3 to 12 will enjoy all the faith building activities from fun crafts and puzzles to character building fiction and powerful Bible stories investing your child's faith all year long. Subscribe today@focusonthefamily.com/kids bags clubhouse and clubhouse Junior award-winning magazines full of games of stories and God find them@focusonthefamily.com/kids may, my favorite trip was when my husband and I went to Hawaii and we got to feed the stingrays so things are family really enjoys his camping and just being outdoors in nature, whether that's in the forest or out on the beach somewhere over my 11th birthday my family had the opportunity to go spend a few days at the Opryland Hotel in Nashville and if you've ever been there. You know it is amazing and it was very exciting.

We went camping one summer down at the blood Museum, which is across from Fort Carson and the kids absolutely loved the hundreds of thousands of votes. One of my favorite family vacations was going to the Grand Canyon and I'll never forget.

When we got to stargazing the clear nighttime sky. It was so will having dentures are some of the best ways to strengthen those relationships with family and your adventure this summer is going to be a special trip.

Something as simple as going on a nature walk with your kids. However, it goes for you every day can provide the opportunities for special memories to be made today on Focus on the Family were to be exploring ways that you can have family adventures in a meaningful way with your kids and your hostess book as president and Dr. Jim Daly, thanks for joining us I'm John Fuller, Jeffrey years that you know this. My family enjoyed camping trips Jean. I think that was the best thing we ever did to bond as a family. It had some funny moments. I'm in the banging of my head on the slide outs and everything else are forgetting to shut the toilet valves and then realizing and the kids love that they howled and laughed at me constantly, pretty much down the something you alluded to John is that adventures don't have to be big, you know, you don't have to get that camper.

We were able to do that was a lot of fun, but you can do so many other things to experience a great adventure were going to talk today about how you can do that on the cheap. Really yeah and we heard some of the things in that open clip that are local.

Here the great things you can do and Greta Eskridge is can help us all think a little bit more creatively about the coming summer. She's an author and blogger and has written a book called adventuring together how to create connections and make lasting memories with your kids in a course, we do have that here. Focusonthefamily.com/broadcast or call 800 K in the word family and a granddaughter and her husband Aaron have four kids were so glad to have her here credit welcome to focus. I'm thrilled to be really good to have you for the moms and dads in the audience for kids howled there 1715 13 and 10 what a wonderful thing. I just think that's great.

Here is crazy, but it you've loved adventure. I think your whole life is something I believe your parents really instilled in you. In fact, you mentioned a rather life-changing trip you took with your dad what what happened when I was 16 my dad and I went to Indiana for six weeks. Know what prompted that you just have this desire to do that or was it a mission stripper pastor and he had gone on previous mission trip to Indonesia and had an opportunity got Indiana and he wanted to bring you long and just change my world and show me Jesus. Anyways, it's a great thing it is one of things Jean and I attempted to do as many missions trips as we could, and I'd encourage parents to do that. What was that impact is a 16-year-old girl. What impression did it make on how gosh it truly lies life-changing. I had such a new appreciation for things as simple as a refrigerator carpet running toilets ice cubes. It was just so says simple things to learn to be grateful and cannot take those things for granted but also it helps me connect with people in new ways. People that that I would seemingly have no ability to connect with because we are so different. Our lives are so different, so different languages. All of us think that because we could talk to one another and meet each other face-to-face we were able to forge these bonds and it was really remarkable. It's something and it's a great lesson definitely know that's a big venture. Not everybody can do that for all kinds of reasons. It can be a little expensive but what your definition of adventure is that's all over the map for parents right well I think that really important things to remember about that particular checklist now is my first flight as a 16-year-old was my first time leaving the country, is my first time leaving the state of California where I grew up.

So prior to that we did small adventures all the time going on bike rides going on hikes near home even taking a trip to the dump was an invention so that adventures can be small. It's not the size of the adventure. It's just the opportunity to connect while you're doing it. It's getting out of the everyday routine that is this because it is simple, but it's often outside of our grasp. As parents. For some reason it's either our schedule were busy we don't stop to think about how do we illuminate our kids world a little bit like you said it doesn't have to be expensive. So how does a parent get into a better place to think. Somewhat like a child think going to the dump to be fun. By the time your parents are going now that doesn't sound so how does a parent maintain that kind of attitude to say could be interesting if I set up a certain way. I love what you said about looking at the world like a child is when my favorite things about little kids is everything is wonderful everything is fascinating and exciting. Just yesterday we were here in Colorado Springs we went to Garden of the gods and there was a little boy he looked like is outside and he saw big rocking and he could step inside, there is like a crevice of the rock, and he said exploring was so excited about a crevice in Iraq if we can have that attitude as parents and we can remember that it doesn't take a trip to Disney World to excite her kids.

They can have the opportunity to climb on a rock and it will rock their world. As I headed amazing gift to give our kids that an to step into that mode. As a parent, it really I think lightens our load. We don't have to plan something extravagant. We just need to get down on their level and see what they like and what likes them.

Yet it does take up attitude adjustment. I think we get down to the budget more to do is we have to do, pull yourself out of that intentionally and think about what's a way that we can have fun this weekend. Let me ask you in the book you mention this idea of stretching, probably both yourself and your kids what were you getting at with using adventures to stretch yourself while I think that discomfort is something that you genuinely and generally try to avoid true comfort can be a real gift. I think discomfort draws us to God because we think I can do this on my own any outside help.

I need God. Discomfort draws us to one another because we realize we have to rely on one another, so discomfort is really connecting connects us to God, it can access to each other as a family we want that so much discomfort. Also helps us realize that we can do hard things, so discomfort that stretching is a gift and one of my favorite things about all the adventures we take is to embrace the misadventure like he said at the beginning of our talk here about the things that went wrong and they make great stories later. That's what will say as a waiter next to me maybe like frustrated that we say it will make a great story later and we sorta hang on to that as the hope to get through. Always as we laugh about it later. And those are like those are the details of our family right are our epic adventures that were kind of a flop were really bad in the moment but they turn into such great stories and memories later on. You headed outside the comfort zone and this one is really interesting to make the bus trip in downtown other moms and kids. I was, I winced a little bit with that one, because safe the balance having adventure thinking about kids being safe and what did you do on the bus trip well I think for that particular line. It definitely was stretching because we were writing like public transportation into downtown LA on purpose. On purpose little kids for the first time altogether. We are a big group so I think that that safety help it wouldn't have been something I would've tried on my own with the 53 and one-year-old.

And you know on how they got altogether and it was growing, stretching and uncomfortable at times but also such a valuable learning experience. One of that particular things that was difficult was that one moment on that. The train it was just us in a person who was clearly homeless and they were hidden under layers of blanket sitting in a wheelchair and all he could see was the feet sticking out underneath and as you can imagine someone who doesn't have access to paving facilities that the owner was strong and it was hard for our kids and the kids that were five and three and everyone noticed and and so it was a moment for us to gather with our kids all the moms huddled with their kids and we help them have compassion for this person who was obviously living in really difficult circumstances, but also as moms we could have compassion for the person and compassion for our kids how we handle with grace.

It was a growing experience but it was good credit. Let's talk about technology that can be a huge distraction to the focus we do a lot of programs on technology and the kids use of technology and frankly the parents use of technology in a course. You see that restaurant you see in your home. We are resetting with their own screen and hardly anybody is interacting. How do you recommend we overcome the challenge of connecting as a family and not through our devices.

That's one of the biggest driving forces for why I wrote this book because I think that we are so distracted. We just live in distracted and disconnected time and I think a lot of times. Technology gives us a false sense of connection because we feel like through social media were connecting with other people but it's not a true connection, and so if we can get away from the screens and do something that really fosters that face-to-face connection or giving a gift to our kids are teaching them that it matters, and I think that when we invite our kids to do something that is actually engaging were not just throwing down the gauntlet and say no more technology but then we don't offer them anything in exchange. That's not a very, very engaging opportunity takes effort right said me say were going to go on a hike today were to go experience something you really do something different in invitation.

That's exciting. Any change so I think technology has a powerful ruler. We need to have a powerful lure with the invitation to adventure and to connect anywhere in your book adventuring together. You identified some common parental mistakes that we make your touching on one right there that we asked them not to do something but don't provide an alternate. What are some of the other things we do as parents we need to be mindful of well my favorites is as parents we often think as our kids grow up, they reached the teenage years that they don't want to connect with us. They don't want to have that time and I think that that's just not the truth.

In fact, when my kids were little, I would often be at the store with a five-year-old, a three-year-old, one-year-old's pregnant and people would look at me and they think I'll enjoy it now because when they're teenagers that will be awful and I rebelled against.

I thought that my story but I knew I had to figure out a way then to write a different story. So as my kids have grown and reach the teenage years now and in the midst of them. I realize they do want to be with me and they want to be together as a family. So as parents with kids who are teens.

We often think they need their own space think they just want to be with her for their friends need to give than that, but I think we need to pull them into us.

They want to be with us even if they initially push away. They really do want to be with us as parents we don't need to make the mistake of thinking our kids, especially as teens don't want to be around us. We need it. We need to continually invite them in talking today on Focus on the Family with Greta Eskridge and her book adventuring together how to create connections and make lasting memories with your kids got copies of that here at the ministry of us a call 800 a family or the link is in the episode notes Greta one of the great observations you made about parents and encourage them in the book is don't freak out.

Don't kind of over plan and that's something I really appreciate that because I think we can become formulaic and we thank you note your family time has to be this or devotional time has to be this and you know kids are quick style you know they can smell style and if you are if you're too regimented that approach with kids.

I don't think they resonate necessarily some kids might, but I don't think. Generally, kids are to resume with those 7730 devotional time to read three chapters in the Morgan do this. It needs some spontaneity doesn't and some unplanned support. I love that and I think that that's for me why adventure is such a powerful way to connect because it's different every time and even if you're doing the same trail you've done before. It's going to be different every time. And in that differentness.

It engages our senses engages us emotionally, physically, spiritually, and that creates that differentness that we need to help them not feel like the drudgery of okay this is already.

Instead, we know that this is to be something different it's going there's going to be some element of excitement and that is that Simon is a great tool. It's a great motivator. Let's get to some practical application so so your mom and dad elementary school-age children. What are some things I get started too much free time to do the homework that's good, but another watching stuff on the screen until dinner and then we are better than they do their own thing and then we hugged each other and say good night and I want to shake up now so how do I get started like any two things right away for the weekdays or weeknights when it feels harder he think the how can I possibly fit an adventure into that thing adventuring through books is a fantastic way to engage the whole family and you don't need to yell me to pick about that you think is going to teach them a lesson to pick a book that everybody's just can enjoy. As you know I was thinking that so that right you get meaningful and purposeful and meaningful and purposeful, but that the purpose and the meaning might simply be that were connecting and so pick a time in those evenings when you feel like an adventure really together and you go on an adventure through book and I'm telling you it's a powerful connecting tool to read books together adventure through books and then when you have a little more time sand weekend or you've picked it may be a day off of school. Whatever it is you could plan something else. I think one of the most simple, affordable, and unique ways to connect is to hike with your kids. We hike together weekly, almost as a family and like I said before, you'll find it's different every time and so simple, but there's a really wonderful thing about hiking together when you're off and away from self service that takes the technology out out the window.

You don't have to worry about it, but you're also able to connect in a way that is different because your walking shoulder to shoulder and I find a lot of conversations happen. Those moments sometimes our kids are not so ready to talk about those deep things when were sitting face to face and they feel certain pressure. But when you're just walking side-by-side and you are engage with God's creation. Your heart is open and it just allows for conversation. So those are two simple things you could do with elementary school students age students and you can have adventures easily yet again, we can overcomplicated which is the thing that probably then discourages us from doing right rather than just go something simple. You also mentioned growing your adventures which I think fits in her nicely if you start simply with a high, how do you grow adventures. What is that mean, and then how do you apply that to your own children now while I think you go from hike to say weekend camping trip okay and you invite them to learn how to make a campfire or set up the tent sleep in a tent, I would say even pushed beyond taking out the camper go in a tent that is an adventure just waiting to happen.

In fact, what changed us was a bear outside said let's get some hard wall that was known as a quick decision. I agree, and then suggest taking up a notch. It doesn't have to be your camping and you know they're infested what you could simply take them camping there was a bear horrible with ounces and definitely. But I bet that they are memory you right through adventure. It's all the better site and growing yet and invite into that say what would excite you. How can you take our families adventures to the next level. What do you dream of doing repairs on one different parts but because our plates are full and we get that but were encouraging you to crack open the ideas and routines we can get into routine though even on these adventures you can get into that rut that I alluded to, what suggestions you have for parents to avoid the routine of the adventure.

I love looking for new places to go places we haven't been before, so that create that requires energy from that and you got a look around. I got a get on the Internet researching atop the other parent.

But I think that that finding new places to go, even if they're not far from home, but it's when you haven't been to yet or challenging yourself that 3 mile hike and usually only had one can do it or going to the museum. I know lots of parents we feel like session.

Your kids are small like Museum sounds terrifying.

If your kid touches that priceless piece of art and all the alarms go off and they look everyone's like they did it take your kids to museum. But what if you create an environment where you just there for an hour and you're giving your kids the opportunity to experience a new thing and that will be stretching for both of you to return to their little over some kind of tarantula place.

I don't think they were dangerous. They were like, you know they let the kid were all on their own or their only through four children have go to the hospital but in the boys remember the day that was one of their big adventures but no hands-on kind of application that idea of tradition and not what I love now and what we've experienced as a family doing the things we've done is now, but when we sit and have dinner together. This is the conversation you remember when that was so much fun when that happened I think that's the payoff for the parent right in that context, you're creating memories that last a lifetime. Literally one of the benefits I've felt in course Trent and Troy are not married. We don't have grin grandchildren you, but it is particularly true as really expressed how he wants to create those kind of environments so you really creating legacy adventure when you do this because your children to grow up there most likely going to get married there most likely to have children around those traditions run yes I love that. Thank you for saying it because I think we need to ask parents have a full vision of what our relationship with our kids can be. It's not just for when their little it's not just for when they're teenagers it into adulthood. One of my most cherished parts of my life is that I still have a relationship with my parents. I love to be with and I still adventure with my dad two years ago my dad invited me to go on a trip to Greece with him for two weeks with a lot of good places we have a lot of fun. I hadn't been on out of the country since my kids were before I had kids had gone away from them in two weeks and for that long. Am sorry I had been away from my kids for that long of a time for two weeks.

It felt like a lifetime that he and my husband encouraged me base. They both said you need to have this adventure. And even as adults we can connect with our parents and I think for my kids to let have a full vision is parents connecting with our kids throughout their lifetime. Your grade. I keep in right near the end here, but I keep coming back to the attitude of the parent. This is what it's all about their things when you do these adventures that will trigger trigger you and you got to relax on that stuff. I member I would just get really intense about setting up the camp and getting things done.

We get the course. We started late and out of the house so by the time we got to South Dakota to pull into you know whatever It's already 7 o'clock.

Jean's answer about dinner. We got for the kids so can I get in the trailer get going. Okay I'll open up the trailer which I would do connect all the lines in the invariably denied, but my head on everything come back with lump-sum bleeding and the but you got to relax is the point of making got a make that fund even in the misfortune of things that will happen. Flat tires hitting beer.

I did hit two dear mother. Hopefully I'll screw with the trailer. You've got to just take a deep breath it's okay Lord help us to have a good time even in the midst of chaos and that's what you're learning about and the kids are to learn from your attitude, so I guess I'm coming back at the end here to say speak to the parents heart about their attitude and what you have to do to maintain a good godly attitude in the adventure. There are so many opportunities to show that number one we turned in times of struggle and there is nothing too small or too big to turn to him, so it might just be we Mr. exit and I get a figure out how to turn around and get back and say kids can you guys pray in terrifying experience so so there's just so many opportunities for us to invite our kids into relationship with God and in into relationship with us and one another as siblings. While we are out on these adventures and were creating a habit of connecting to God, and those moments are creating habitus, connecting with one another in fostering a relationship together in the context probably the best place is how in all of these great adventures do we bring God into it in a way that the kids will respond. I can't think of a better place to get to know God out in his creation. EC has power.

You see his creativity he see his love and his care for us. He's an artist and over and over again. I have said to me, kids.

We get to know God by as their creator we get to know our creator by experiencing his creations.

I think we can adventure anywhere but I have to say have a special spot in my heart for adventuring outdoors because it draws a so close… A great read of this is been so good. It has inspired me for the summer.

I haven't come up with many creative ideas yet so to be working on it over the next few days I know bidders will try to use the Bears and do other things with. Thank you for being with this wonderful book adventuring together to create connections and make lasting memories with your kids and it's true I'm on the back end of it now with two boys 20 and 18. This is what our family experience was built on.

I'm so glad you put it into a book for others to learn from you and we encourage you to get the book we got that here at the ministry of the details are in the episode notes or give us a call 800 the letter a in the word family and we do have a free resource for you on the website.

It's apparent the assessment it takes a few minutes for Rita to fill out and it'll show you where your strong as a parent and may be an area or two of growth, perhaps adventure is one of those areas: a stop by view the website to find out the seven traits for effectively parenting your kids and how you can grow in greater what a great book adventuring together how to create connections and make lasting memories with your kids. What a wonderful resource, and right here at the beginning of summer.

We want to get it in your hands if you can make a gift of any amount will send it to as our way of saying thank you for joining the ministry here if you can afford it. We believe in adventures, so I will get a trillion trust others will cover the cost just in touch with dinner number is 800 K in the word for coming up next time on this broadcast ways to orchestrate greater peace and that is probably one of the most powerful statements. Why, why is somebody thing. Why are they hunting you if we can go to the Y, then we can see the humans involved in and read with compassion on behalf of Jim Daly and the entire team.

Thanks for joining us today for Focus on the Family I'm John Fuller inviting you back once more help you and your family thrive fine on your kids just a click away ventures and Odyssey club find trusted faith building and attainment safe online club features almost every episode ever special monthly club only episodes in content and Focus on the Family clubhouse magazine subscription. Sign up today I'll club.org/radio