Why Mothers And Fathers Matter

This is family policy matter program is produced by the North Carolina family policy Council of profamily research and education organization dedicated to strengthening and preserving the family enough in the studio.

Here's John Rushton, president of the North Carolina family policy Council and thank you for joining us for family policy matters. It is our pleasure to have David left with us on the program is David is a research fellow at the Institute for family studies, and affiliate scholar at the Institute for American values and coinvestigator of the love and marriage in middle America project, which is a qualitative research study into how working-class young adults form relationships and families. David blogs and I believe in love.com and family studies.org. His work has appeared in media outlets such as the Wall Street Journal, the Atlantic online and first things David is with us to discuss a new report from the Institute for American values center of the American experiment and the Institute for family studies, entitled mothers bodies father's bodies how parenthood changes us from the inside out. We will be talking with David about some of the reports. Key findings regarding the differences between mothers and fathers as well as the similarities and why and how they work together to produce the best family environment for children.

They were welcome to the program will thanks for joining us today to tell us briefly about the origins of this report and its purpose. Sure, well, 2008, the Institute for American values and the Center for American experiment family. They invited about 40 researchers from across the country for three days at the University of Virginia to review commission papers and to engage in a structured conversation about the question what is apparent and as we all know that is there is all kinds of debates now about we need mothers and fathers, do we need father is what role do they play in the development of their children and relieve this initiative. The idea was to bring together scholars to look at the evidence and see what the what the sciences are telling us about the role of mothers and fathers.

Development of the children and specifically to bring together scholars from the natural and the social sciences.

So you're bringing together on neuroscientists. For instance, bent and putting them in conversation with sociologist. These are two groups of scholars that usually don't talk to each other because they're one. Neuroscientists are looking at the brain and sociologists are looking at stats and looking at and talking to people. So this really wanted to kind of bridge the divide and see what the sciences are telling us about parenthood, contains 10 key findings regarding mothers and fathers in parenting in general and we won't talk about several of those findings today. The first two findings deal with how motherhood and fatherhood changes the brains and bodies of both moms and dads and I can certainly testify as a parent of two children, two teenagers, in fact, that my mind and how he has has changed a lot during my parenting years. If you will. David gives a few examples of how becoming a parent physically changes both mothers and fathers sure what you know you don't have all parents are aware of the obvious kind of changes in a lot of sleep, a lot of times you might fear something retired and of course as a as a woman becomes pregnant.

She her body is changing very little weight but interesting thing that the sciences are showing us is these kind invisible changes that are happening inside of mothers and fathers bodies during pregnancy and after the birth of children. So for instance let's talk about fathers during pregnancy. If the father is living with the mother and is involved in the mother's life.

Typically what happens with the father is.

He experiences a surge of the hormone prolactin.

Now that is interesting because prolactin is the same foreman that helps mothers make milk and scientists are still trying to figure out what exactly this surgeon of prolactin does for men, but it made many scientific has something to do with the help fathers to bond with their with their children and note this is happening during the pregnancy.

Then after birth again.

Fathers who are involved with their children and with that, the mother of the child.

They typically experience a decrease in the hormone testosterone and course. Many of us know that testosterone is associated with end of the aggressive behavior to a decrease in testosterone studies show is associated with more responsive parenting. For instance, when they went. Scientists watched on the file of fathers in an and lab settings. Fathers with lower test drop testosterone where I held Beatty test all the longer and fathers with higher testosterone and this is despite the fact that what is one study found that men would have higher testosterone were more likely to become fathers than men with lower testosterone by after those high testosterone men became fathers, they experience significant drops in net hormone and so really this is an amazing kind of discovery when you when you put all this together. What you see is that really the men are hardwired for more than just sex. Fathers bodies are physically hardwired to connect with children. It's like when a man becomes apparent. His body is prewired to help him to connect with his child. If provided, that the father is is involved with the child's life. We humans have found success with the strategy. Some dogs and I quote a cooperative breeding, strong force David and explain what it means and why it's important and I really I prefer the term of the report also uses the term cooperative parenting which I pretty use it and that really cooperative breeding a cooperative parity that just is a way to describe the way that human mothers and some other primates raise their offspring with the help of family men members and of course humans is typically up with a father and as we all know it takes several years for human child to become independent and this is long.

Dependents and nurturance in which the child is dependent on mother and father, but we take all this for granted, but this is very different from what happens in most species of males typically are just there for conception and then they're gone and only about 510% of mammalian species are the fathers there to help, but in humans. The father's role is of course critical to the development of children as will talk about later, and so on.

This idea cooperative parenting is is very very important is just referring to the fact that mothers depend on help typically father to raise their children, mothers and fathers are similar is. Can you talk about that and explain why some I consider this to be a new finding, so to speak, you know.

Typically, mothers are associated with morbid nurturing parent and it but recent news. The report discusses a study of that psychologist by the name of Ross Park who is a well-known fatherhood expert while sparking his colleagues.

They conducted studies in which they watched dads interact with their newborns and they also watched moms interact with their newborns and they found that and I quote here that fathers touched, looked at vocalizer rocked and kissed their newborns just as much. As far as as mothers did and Ross Park and his colleagues.

They concluded that that dads were just as responsive to their infants behaviors and verbal cues as mothers were, and just as capable of providing important nurturing care and this is important because the report also discusses that scholars call the kind of parenting style that is associated with the best outcomes for children. They call this authoritative parenting and authoritative parenting it is describing the powerful mix of affection involvement structure and coherent and consistent discipline.

Those four things that is associated with a very good outcomes for children and studies are showing that dads for all four of those things. They're very good at providing all those things on to their children as our mother. Traditionally, we often think about how mothers and fathers and the smoke is already built or are different in their parenting styles talk a little bit about the research project and what it showed.

With respect to how parents interact differently with their children yeah yeah and so there. As we discussed, there is important ways in which mothers and fathers. A similar but there is also the wonderful ways that there different and many mothers and fathers don't need studies to tell them this but studies have in fact confirmed that dads for instance, are much more likely to throw the children up in the air.

Other much more likely to in their interactions with children there more physical there more playful, surprising and kind of risk oriented and as report says the father's style of interaction with their children seems geared to push children out of the nest. By contrast, numerous studies have found that mothers are more vulnerable and more affectionate or predictable comforting and protective with their children in that style of interaction seems geared to make children feel at home in the next children need both and mothers and fathers in their different parenting styles provide those things. So again it it points to this this this can think about how dads are hardwired to connect to their kids in a way that is somewhat distinct from the way that mothers appear hardwired to connect with their children important finding distinct yet complementary differences between them and as the report states. These similarities and differences have quote from the report. I have found shape in marriage think this is a really powerful statement in the report and another thing the report speaks of is that more than any other institution of marriage predicts whether both a mother and a father will be involved in a child's life and to what extent talk more about this finding about how the mothers and fathers really found her father shape in marriage right or service. We were talking about this idea, cooperative parenting and in order and we children appear hardwired to tentative connect with their moms and dads and similar distinct ways. But the key is what brings the mom and dad together and make sure that this that this unit is able to stick together and that is marriage and we know the science is pretty clear here that when the parents are married, they are much more likely to report having a good relationship with the children. Children were likely reported privilege parents as well and they married. So, for instance, one study found that 65% of children of divorce, report a poor relationship with her father, as compared to 29% of children from non-divorced families, and 30% of children of divorce report approve relationship with their mom as compared to 16% from non-divorced families, so when mom and dad stick together. Children are much more likely to enjoy a bond with both mom and dad and that's important because as we've been talking about children need further in development. The contributions of both mom and dad we're out of town for this week go to learn more about this new report mothers body swallows bodies to read more of your research and articles about marriage, family, etc. are all mentioned to link there is American values.work and you couldn't there's a link to the report there and also I believe in love.com and where my wife and I both frequently blog people's websites for our listeners who are interested and I would encourage you to go and avail yourselves of the information on both American values.org again, American values.org as well as I believe in love.com again that's all I believe in love.com David Locke, thank you so much for being with us on family policy matters. We really appreciate your time and your great insight. Thank you so much for having sex family policy matters is information and analysis, future of the North Carolina family policy Council join us weekly discussion on policy issues affecting the family. If you have questions or comments, please contact nine 197-0800 or visit our website and see family.org and