Built to Last, Part 2 (cont'd)

What good music teachers about relationships will find out next on this Monday edition of Dustin for victory hello and thanks for tuning in just a few moments, Pastor Paul Sheppard takes us to the life of David as he shares his message built to last before he get started he joined me now from a studio in California pastor.

We celebrated Father's Day on June 20 he got me to thinking. I'm sure listeners are curious about this as well when you look back in your childhood and even your young adulthood.

What would you say is the most important lesson you learned from your father. I think I would say of all the lessons I learned. He taught me how important humility is. I see preachers and I see folks who have broad exposure much broader than exposure. I have and sometimes they seem to struggle with pridefulness and I've even seen so few that a civil Lord that that just looks a little too much like arrogance for me. I'm not anyone's judge, but I am mindful of the fact that we can appear to the world like we are full of ourselves. If we appear full of ourselves and we're not showing them who Christ is, because even have any room to show good.

We are showing ourselves all the time and so my dad taught me if you stay low even if you fall, you won't have far to go, and I love that, and I have lived that so when I've had my times of falling and failing. I knew the way up is down, hit the ground. Honor God admit where you have been and let the Lord restore and bless your life. My dad taught me that, and I'm forever grateful for that lesson. Such a great reminder Pastor Paul. Humility precedes almost every good thing God longs to give us, including our salvation in Jesus Christ, thanks for the great word of encouragement. Speaking of fathers and the wisdom we gain from them. This month we have two very special gifts to share with you yours for your best gift of $25 or more to Destin for victory. During these critical summer months. The first is Pastor Paul's book why God created dad's an insightful and inspirational look at the subject of fatherhood through the lens of Scripture. The second is the audio CD attribute to my dad a message delivered by Pastor Paul following the death of his father. Men and women alike will be inspired by these timely resources.

That's why God created dad's and attribute to my dad our gifts to you this month for your best donation of $25 or more to Destin for victory.

Please call 855-339-5500 or visit Pastor Paul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destin for victory PO Box 1767, Fremont, CA 94538. Again, our address Destin for victory.

Box 1767, Fremont, CA 94538. We will remain different people but God wants us to walk together, pray together grow together serve together so that together we can get more done than either one of us can get done along. That's the will of God for your life. If you've ever heard two people singing in harmony. You get a sense of what relational oneness can and should be each person sings a different key in his or her own style, one that stands alone and has a life all its own, together they produce something better than what they could alone.

Today on Destin for victory. Pastor Paul Sheppard reminds us of God's will for us when it comes to our relationships that in our diversity, we will establish harmony with one another is Pastor Paul. Now with the rest of today's message built to last. When a child is born into the world. They are born, legally helpless only have to depend on others everything when you show up you are dependent, by the way, is why those of you who are still walking around about your self-made need a reality check. There is a self-made individual on the planet. There's no such thing as showing your ignorance about your self-made to get to the place where you could be smart enough to think that you that you think you are all well by my bootstraps.

Somebody had to buy you make an you will totally dependent we all start out totally dependent you stage as you begin moving to a toddler you are still in the you stage dependent. You say you message you take care of me you love me you are me you make me feel good. You give me what I want you to take responsibility for my comfort and welfare when I member you stage myself and security come directly from you as a dependent human being is because you make me feel good about myself now is a proper time for that right way that is God's design.

We want parents. That's why God gave you children needing give you children for you to preach all this because we have misdirected to see little teenagers on TV baby I'm purposely trying to get pregnant so I can have somebody to love me where misdirected as the people in life. She brought her here have not equipped to properly thinking human being and so let me help you understand something that's not God's plan at all… Give you children for you. Children are a heritage of the Lord God gives you children because he has a plan for them and their lives, and your job is to bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord God with all their heart malls and wisdom and understanding, and affirmation so that the sense of our God has graded them to be world and make a difference God gives you children so that you can out of a job and bring them to the place where they're ready now to live life in his will for you. I've said before and it bears repeating that if you don't ever feel adequately praised and thanked by your children. One day God will say well done. I'm telling you, I love my parents growing up, but once I became a married man had mold. My parents became much smarter much smarter and much wiser things I didn't understand.

I came to understand and things I said I would never say to my children because I really when I was young and mean it wasn't wisdom.

One day the Lord is going to say well done good and faithful servant is your job as a parent to instill a sense of conditional love them I love you just because you are you because you are the object of God's love and God's representative in your life in human father and mother, not just my mother's job had to be part of it because God wants you to be active in telling you you don't create a baby and off somewhere be there to be part of them coming. Understand who they are, so that you stage and it's a natural normal stage in our job is to build them up. Teach them that they'll love that sense of self-worth and security doesn't come from you. It will come from anywhere you stage a person's position is I don't know who I am until you tell me and you stage in a dependent stage. If you don't like me.

I'm devastated. I'm completely devastated because I need that message from you now. We are to grow out of that and grow into a second stage which is the independent stage dependent stage is that you stage the independent stage is the stage. The message from you to me this is a normal natural stage to move into impact. It is absolutely necessary to become the people God wants us to be.

We must get to the place where I no longer need you to tell me who I am no longer need that.

So if a child is being developed properly it will get to a place where eventually they began to take pride in who they are, they began to have a self identity.

I stayed seated in children when they come first to a button-down close but I can know when you see that Guardian when you see that rejoicing that moving in the right direction and some of you have taken very intentionally. Some of you on trying to help you now know what you don't know the movement into mass, I can't be an extension of their 24, 25 year old is become normal in the progressive make a big issue at times to place what they want to try to okay you know we sold a few times when they raised are doing it right. It since I'm doing this. Learning this we learn together. We learn something like a big deal. Something may come to make all want so that you can sell it right will need you to button the closing make you will be right back with more.

Today's Destin for victory message from Pastor Paul Sheppard, senior pastor, destiny Christian Fellowship in Fremont, California.

Be sure to listen to the broadcast on demand@pastorpaul.net that's Pastor Paul.net and there to find a host of great resources in our online store you want to build healthy godly relationships, but don't know how. Stay with us now for the rest of today's Destin for victory message built to last.

Once again, here's Pastor Paul cream of wheat was my love was the food of the gods I love cream of wheat all growing up there was no cream of wheat in the house.

It was a problem in my mother got cooking cream. She brought me in watch what I do, show me one time and then she said I want you to do it and trying to tell me and she walked me through it and I mean in a matter of she had me know, and she was of the cream of wheat business and I cannot live with some cream of you will never starve around me.

We can store and get some cream of wheat when the message you stage my validation no longer comes from you. I'm now getting the internal message in the stage. I get to a place where because my validation is in her because I stamp my own ticket validated parking place when you stamp your own ticket in life, I validate myself that I help to consult about this and if you don't get it right and the only people 2025 3540 4550+ years steel know what it is to be in the independent stage walking around looking for somebody to validate from you syndrome and I'm telling you it is not God's will. You gotta get some light into your life and use me no problem. You try to bring you and me, not in the popular when you come when you meet you when you get to the place where you say, like me, she loves me.

Problem call somebody you will will somebody else is problem is not a problem. All somebody that they don't really want to be there. Not a problem at all.

Thank you for let me know your actions speak louder than words. You know when people start and you know you try to Jim about what you know really going to get some time just to get straight on, where things are and you go fishing like that and what you get is what you know like you to I think you, special paragraph all I probably wouldn't pressure on you that have no business putting on you. You are free to explore whatever is in your heart.

Whatever you're looking for wonderful hangouts and fellowship. That's why you gotta guard your heart and your body with all diligence emotional sense. You don't get body parts to somebody who's not committed to you please pass the pole back in the dark ages somewhere. No you said somebody you the Bible says when you've given yourself to someone you become joined to the problem and I seem to hate each other and can't break up because they violated this principle and so physically and emotionally invested in the wrong person not know they have been together about one element somewhere and be something like Something why because we been playing with fire, and the wise man Solomon said you can't take fire and not be burned, so you gotta get to that independent stage where I don't need you to tell me who I am. I know why and when the message I get from you is other than what I know to be true know how to dismiss the message you are giving you the wrong message hello and tell you nothing will be anything wrong answer wrong. You just got that one wrong you go to jail do not collect $200 you let me tell you something, God has a plan for you to move. Why is this important because only people can make the choice to move into the stage God is bringing Jonathan and David into and bringing us into and some of our relationship and that is the interdependent state independent to independence to into dependence. Interdependence is a stage only to independent people can move into if you try to build an interdependent relationship with a person who was emotionally dependent. You got a problem because you can't depend on them. It's all depending on you because they did get some things early in life, they still don't know who they are, they still don't know what God is trying to do in the life they still have a sense of self identity and think you're building a mutual relationship, and all you're doing is creating a blame.

A codependent relationship and so you've got to visit the people that God would bring in your life who know who they are, would say I know what I am bringing you into my life so you can tell me why I'm not bringing you into my life so that I can make you like me or I become like you remain different people but God wants us to walk together, pray together grow together serve together so that together we can get more done than either one of us can get done alone.

That's the will of God for your life. That's how you create a relationship characterized by oneness you make sure that there is that sense of self. Jonathan embraced David because Jonathan lacked understanding of who God made him the beat he knew he was Saul's son. In fact, later on were going to see that he is willing to give up what he could have easily considered his right to the throne because Jonathan and Saul son could have easily said to be the next King's but he was so sure of who he was going to see him say to David, I know that God has raised you up as the next king, he said, and I'm going to be second to you.

You can only get there when you know you are not dated by the goodness of other people from dependence to independence to interdependence.

These are the three stages of growth in each is essential in grooming us for what comes next. Thanks so much for joining us for today's message built to last.

If you'd like more information about the destined for Victor ministry or this month special offer for all that are able to give the most generous gift this summer visit Pastor Paul.net that's Pastor Paul.net problem with many of us don't graduate from the school of independence and a lot of us stay independent probably staunchly independent and I'm telling you this is not God's will for your life. That's tomorrow with Pastor Paul Sheppard shares his message built to last until then, remember he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory