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The word appear that hopefully will help you to handle. Shame is the word identity what is identity for a Christian you identity is who you are in Christ unless you understand that and truly believe that you will struggle when people in your life. Don't affirm that people don't validate you unless you know who you are in Christ. Who are you in Christ. You'll redeem your blood bought. You have been forgiven. You are a new creation in Christ.

You are more than a conqueror.

You are a child of the heavenly King, unless you truly believe that people don't like your picture makes for a bad day you have a bad that you take it out on those around you is her portion of the upcoming sermon entitled related by Dr. Robin on shop could be church here clearing our goal is to make Christ visible in the way that we worship in the way that we serve others we love to see it. One of our services at 3485 Oxford Rd. For more information on our church physically BBC.org, but for now this week sermon relatives, family members and loved ones. We all have them. Don't wait and we all love them they would do anything for us. We would do anything for them. Having said that, there also the very people who drive us crazy, specially man during the holiday season.

Someone said it this way.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close knit family in another city, adding they they may have a point.

Now if your family is wonderful.

You guys get along love each other. That's great. Pass this message on to someone else. But maybe you do need to hear this message because in today's message were going to learn that even Jesus had to deal with a crazy earthly family. In fact, throughout his earthly ministry. They thought he was out of his mind.

Jesus used wisdom and grace in relating with his family and that's exactly what you and I need we need wisdom and grace. If you have the Bibles with you turn to Mark chapter 3, starting in verse 20 and less salt once again stand for the reading of God's word. Mark chapter 3 starting in verse 20 then the multitudes came together again so that they could not so much as eat bread when his own people heard about this they went out to lay hold of him for this said he is out of his mind. They're talking about Jesus.

He is out of his mind than his brothers and his mother came, and standing outside. This sent to him calling him this is verse 31 in the same chapter and verse 32 and a multitude was sitting around him in this said to him, look, your mother and your brothers are outside seeking you.

But he answered them, saying, who is my mother or my brothers, and he looked around the circle at those who sat about him and said here are my mother and my brothers for whoever does the will of God is my brother and my sister and mother would you bow your heads right now, right where you are never given your life to Christ say a simple prayer that says Jesus I don't everything in the Bible her and everything about who you are and why you came but I know this much I need you in my life. I need you to come into my life.

Forgive me of my sins and take over. I repent. I believe I confess that I'm a sinner. You are the Savior, the perfect Lamb of God who died for me, was buried, and rose again and I will live for you from this day on now. Thank you for saving as many of you know I have been pastoring for about 21 years and through the years people have come to me for counseling in all kinds of issues and situations, but in my experience were the major issues that people struggle with is family relationships now family. We love them.

They give us a sense of belonging to give us a place to go on special days on holidays.

We have a family get together. We have a family reunion coming up is an awesome feeling to have the people in your life you know your past good and bad in this still accept you for no other reason other than were related, our family, or a family member can also be a great source of consternation or pain in our lives, their family members or a family member who for one reason or another, has turned toxic and has been for a long time and people like that usually use two weapons that we get a focus on this morning and they are.

I called them weapons of mass destruction in the first weapon is the weapon of shame is often done in family circles. Shame something in your past that is brought up to shame you or the other weapon and sometimes both are used sometimes they overlap is blame shame and blame. These are two things that family uses and they are destructive, their horrible and even though Jesus came for the primary purpose of redemption. Keep in mind he is fully God. He too had a family that used shame and blame against him, but he dealt with them with wisdom and with grace. It was up to me I would just be like your God. You don't exist anymore, and yet he didn't do that, he used wisdom and grace and we need to do the same. So let's go back to that starting in verse 20 we just read this passage, then the multitude came together again so that they could not so much as eat bread to understand what this means we need to back up to verse seven of the same chapter Mark chapter 3 in verse seven it says, but Jesus withdrew with his disciples to the seat and a great multitude from Galilee, which is to the north followed him, and from Judeo which is to the south and Jerusalem, which is the capital right. This is the place the holy city, and are doing me and beyond the Jordan, and those from Tyre and Sedona. So not only people on this side of the Jordan, the Westside but also the side when Jesus began his ministry.

How thousands upon thousands of people were going to him and was he doing with them. Listen to verse nine. So he told his disciples that a small boat should be Ready for him because of the multitude, lest they should crush him. All they were trying to do was get to him and just touch him, because if you touch him. You could be healed. Jesus was not some charismatic figure who just loved a big following you follow me, hereby follow me I am your leader. I am you grew. That's not what was happening. Of course, thousands of people following him because their lives were being transformed if the reset listen to what it says in the verse 10 he healed many so that as many as had afflictions pressed about him to touch him. Something else was happening. Listen to verse 11 and the unclean spirits whenever they saw him they fell down before him and cried out, saying you are the son of God.

People were demonically possessed of hose that still happens to this day the demonic world is very active and it controls and it tries to destroy lives and even Christians. You may not be possessed but you would be terribly influenced if you allow evil into your life.

Here's what I'm saying to you everything Jesus was doing was to transform and help people.

It was changing lives, but what was the response of his family were talking about the extended family listen to verse 21 but when his own people heard about this now. Who are the own people. These are not just Jesus's immediate family. These are the extended family.

We talk by extended family were talking about people living in his hometown hometown of Nazareth, just like even today small communities.

Every body is related. That's why you never talk bad about anybody. You never know it might be 1/3 cousin her.

Her second cousin or whatever. Even now in different parts of around here you go through communities thereby seems to have the same last name right this somehow they are related. So what happens word gets back to Nazareth, where Jesus is from that that he is doing all these things. So what is the reaction listen to verse 21 again.

They went out to what to praise him now. One of the do they came to lay hold of him.

The word is cried tail which means to seize him.

They were going to bind him up violently take him and do what take them back home like even mine. Thousands of lives are following Jesus. The sick are being healed. A demon possessed ours being set free and family. This does extended family back home is like we gotta get them out of NY. The snow again in verse 21 is said he is out of his mind.

The word in Greek is X histamine. It's a combination word of X is the same word from which we get a word exit exit means what you're leaving your leaving your departing histamine standing so he is standing but his mind has left him as that happened to you. Maybe not physically but verbally and even emotionally.

Sometimes family members have a way of telling you we don't approve of folks if you're doing something wrong. If you're about to commit an affair or addiction, your family members should step up – that should be the impetus that tells you I can do this because I have to phase. Grandma have to face my cousins. I have to phase family members. I cannot act this way, but unfortunately many times we have success in life. Whatever the successes you found somebody to love. You are in a good business. You bought a new home. You are new car your kids just graduated your your family is doing well.

Instead of being happy for you what happens many times family members have a way of saying are you will Modelo say well done. There was a RUL, are you okay you look so good is validation's affirmation that that we are looking for an and same thing in Jesus's ministry. His family refused to validate to the contrary, they came to lay hold of him now. Why were they like that. Let's back up to Mark chapter 6 for a moment, because here we get a context he gives us a context of why this extended family. These people in Nazareth did what they did. It was a big town. By the way, is like one caution light town Nazareth was not very big. Well, let's go to Mark chapter 6 and verse one to get some context and he went out from there and came to his own country's old stomping grounds and near Nazareth and his disciples followed him. And when the Sabbath came in… Jesus is hometown as a little boy he went to the synagogue. He went to the synagogue every Sabbath so Sabbath comes he goes the synagogue. What happens many were hearing him. He began to teach and there were astonished saying where did this man get these things they know him, but when he learned to talk like this and what wisdom is this which which is given to him that such mighty works are performed by his hands now. Mention of this. So you're awake.

Listen to the next verse is this not the carpenter didn't say is this not the carpenter's son.

Grandma Joseph was a carpenter. Really he was a handyman. The word really doesn't mean carpenter like working with wood necessarily but he was in on the common odd jobs, man didn't say this is Joseph son because we know this boy is it legitimate by the way, there are no illegitimate kids right there just a legitimate parents sometimes it their family members who have a way of bringing up stuff just to put you back in your place about Ms. listen very carefully.

I don't care how much Bible you know how much you love John MacArthur and Charles Stanley and Adrian Rogers will be BNR good gun matter, but if you do that kind of stuff you are living in sin if you like the shame people. Christ is not the Lord of your life no matter how much you claim you need to repent. Is this not the carpenter because it is no longer there.

Then the son of Mary didn't send Mary and Joseph, Mary, and brother of James Joses, Judas and Simon and his sisters here with us, so they were listen to this word was the work they were offended. The word is scanned the lid so from which we get our English word scandal. Remember, the scandal from 30 years ago. Yeah I remember that this boy is a product of that scandal in a crazy real still isn't helping anybody she became going crazy. The son of God, the one who sits at the right hand of God became fully man and they are bringing up his past as a scandal.

It blows my mind. The problem was shame listen very carefully and some of you if your family is great. I hope this is a mess it up very so keep it going.

Pray for God's protection around maybe is about to be messed up. That's why God brought you here today, but I'm talking to those who might be struggling with similar issues here as I want you to remember some people will never get over your past. Stop trying to convince them. Some people will never forget. No matter how much of a hero or a hero, and you may be hometown heroes are far are few and far between, and sometimes of the view, hoping they'll build you a statute may happen after you die is a question is that you do you like to shame people do you like to put them back in their place here something I want you to hear grow with people you know what it means to grow with people. It means this stop treating people like you treated them 20 or 30 years ago when they were down and out. Now I'm saying this doesn't know my heart.

You gonna try to be prideful but I'm to sharing my heart our churches to be very small so we all remember those days 20 members was a good Sunday and and so I was working two jobs. Nicole did too. We would try to survive and you had I we knew some people would call and you know just talk down Paul down just to she does like that little arrow small little church on the other side of the tracks. That's not an amount to much… You felt it at anybody here understand what about what you feel in some eyes talking down to use as a funny thing. Our church is growing by the grace of God. Dozens of amazing things. I give him all the glory.

Do you know some of the same people still come around in the try to talk the same way you what they're trying to do their try to remind me you're still the same. Nashik shrugged their arm off and say don't do that. I give God the glory.

This is not a pride issue, but this is about you bringing your toxicity into my life I can have that he listen yet do the same thing with family members when the try to put you back there and you'll place you have to cut, gotta get your off can go there somebody getting this what happened over here and I listen.

Listen, this is very powerful. My my challenge to you is if you are the person who does this wrong with you with the people in your life. Don't think that people are still where there were 20 years ago or even two years ago. They will appreciate you far more if you treat them with respect and listen.

They may even give you credit for where they are today, and yet Jesus is extended family.

By the way, did not do that now. How did Jesus respond to this. Listen to verse four but Jesus said to them, our time is running away. A prophet is not without honor except in his own country, among his own. I'm making this up.

This is in the Bible is that my own relatives. My earthly relatives cannot treat me with honor and in his own house. Now keep in mind all this was a fulfillment of prophecy that there is a double drama that is taking place.

Of course, one drama is happening in a particular time and place, but on the other hand, Jesus is step-by-step, fulfilling every prophecy of the Old Testament and the prophecies found in's and Psalm 69 verse eight I have become a stranger to my brothers in an alien to my mother's children.

I have become. Now go back to verse five Mark chapter 6. Now he could do no mighty work there, except that he laid his hands on a few people who were sick, and healed them. Now listen, reversing this very powerful and he marveled there many things in the Bible. I don't understand this is one of them. Jesus was fully God fully man at one time he knew, past, present, future. He is sovereign. He is all the omnis put together, and yet at that moment is going wow this is quite amazing there shaming me.

He marveled because of their unbelief, but then he does something that he went about the villages in his circuits teaching. He didn't stay there and say I wonder what I can do to please them or put a word up here that hopefully will help you to handle shame, and is the word identity what is identity for a Christian you identity is who you are in Christ unless you understand that and truly believe that you will struggle when people in your life. Don't affirm you when people don't validate you unless you know who you are in Christ. Who are you in Christ.

You'll redeem your blood bought. You have been forgiven. You are a new creation in Christ. You are more than a conqueror.

You are a child of the heavenly King, unless you truly believe that when people don't like your picture. It makes for a bad day and when you have a bad day, you take it out on those around you. You have to walk with Christ. You have to read the word you have to pray on a daily basis basis.

You have to have a living breathing relationship with Jesus Christ, unless you have that you identity is going to always drift towards isolation or whatever someone wants you to be as go back to Mark chapter 3 in verse 31, something else happens is extended family from Nazareth comes and does all this because they are trying to shame him, but then his brothers and his mother also came. Now how did they come. Maybe the hometown crowd went and told them hey look, we can do anything with him. He is surrounded by thousands of people he would try to get hold of him and Dragon home they'll kill us but listen to what they do. Verse 31, and standing outside Jesus was in a house in Capernaum. They did not go in.

They stood outside a somebody may say will maybe he was too crowded in there. This was not a crowd issue. Okay, this was not because he was too crowded to walk into the room is a how do you know that maybe crop will listen to the next verse, and a multitude was sitting around him and this said to him what luck, which means what big is a loved your mother and your brothers are outside seeking you know why they were doing that they were refusing to come in by refusing to come in.

They were refusing to endorse his success if you grew up in a home like that.

If you have parents to do this.

I'm so sorry.

Their problem was blamed they were blaming Jesus, not a Jesus respond.

I love this is a so great. But he answered them, saying, who is my mother and my brothers but he answered and he looked around in a circle of those who sat about him and said, here are my mother and my brothers were whoever does the will of God is my brother and my sister and mother very powerful, which means this Jesus did not submit his ministry to his family's approval. If your family is doing that to you nonetheless is because you are messing around your getting into moral things or addiction in their trying to guide you. That's one thing what I'm talking about that they're trying to control your life.

What is God's vision.

If you're a believer. Every person has the vision to seek and to save that which was lost. If we were to end this message here, you know what this message would be us against the world us against family.

If you have a great family wonderful if you don't have a great family know who you are, know what God has called you do forget them. But the message doesn't end because Jesus did not and his ministry on earth with honor who I am. This is what I came to do. He ended his ministry with grace is out of you know that will how did he and his ministry with his mother. We remember in John chapter 19 Jesus was hanging on the cross, giving his final statements in our room of that and who was standing there before him and is says not. There stood by the cross of Jesus, his mother and his mother's sister and us couple other people when Jesus therefore saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing by. What is Jesus due from the cross. He looks at his mother and says mother, behold, your son, and he looks at the beloved disciple, John, and says this is your mother and listen folks, you never go wrong showing grace about his brother's well.

Paul tells us a little bit about it in first Corinthians chapter 15 in verse four Paul is giving us the gospel in a nutshell, he says, Jesus rose again the third day according to the Scriptures, that he was seen by Cephas meeting Peter than by the 12. After that, he was seen by our 500 but now listen to verse seven. After that, he was seen by James. Now who is James James was Jesus's brother member James and Judas and couple other names and what happened because of that, James became the pastor of the mother church to meet mother church is Jerusalem and he wrote the epistle of James.

When my favorite books in the New Testament it what that tells us that Jesus did not stop with identity and vision. He went on to demonstrate grace towards his family. Me to come and pray. Coming in praying, does not mean my family is a mess coming and fraying is saying God wants you to use me. I want you to work in my life. Remove any bitterness in my heart a human or family that needs prayer. You may know a couple that needs prayer.

Even though an agent family member who needs prayer you know someone who's just become cantankerous. Whatever happened at that event I remember watching this conversation at dinner table at a family reunion where one person said to another runt from the I never liked you is not funny. Honest.

It was horrible. I feel so bad for this person under what you've done, but this is not right and that person claimed to be a Christian and I said last night and on the way out. The lady said yeah my brother-in-law said that to me so I don't like. If you've done those kind of things you need to really need to be repenting's not right does not represent Christ grace grace puts the other person first and doesn't generally thank you so much for listening to this week's sermon. How do you do with your family. When we know our identity and wing of the vision that God has given us. We can do with our family in a way that honors God in a way that brings glory to his name.

For more information and for the sermons, notes, check out Dr. Shaw's blog and have it on shop.com for more information on Clearview check out our website@clearbbc.org starting February 9. We have an exciting new Greek course. This will take place on Sunday nights at 6 PM will be going through Dr. David Alan Black's course called Greek for everyone, led by Dr. orthodontia.

This course is designed to teach everybody in the church from leaders to lay members alike how to read and understand the original language of the New Testament.

This is such an awesome investment into your spiritual life it'll change the way you read God's hope to see you there. February 9 at 6 PM