Skeletons in the Family Closet

Welcome to the radio ministry at Cleveland church in Henderson Barnes goal is to make Christ visible Clearview is a place of genuine worship with ministries for all age groups and all people. For more information, visit us at 3485 Oxford Rd. in Henderson or visit us online@clearviewb.org now join us for this week's message by Pastor Otto several years ago. Nicole was really in doing her family history of the genealogy stuff and so she scoured the libraries she was on the Internet for hours and hours and we would go to graveyards just trying to match the tombstones with the names of family and all of that all over Georgia. She would be up late at night had notes scattered everywhere on the dining room table to me was quite a time in our lives as you try to connect this these genealogical dogs from this family to this family and that family and there this summer.

It was, it went on for months until she could see that she was getting frustrated and she came to me one day as I just don't know that these some of these people have just vanished into thin air. I just can't seem to get past them. I just don't know what's going on. She called up her grandmother in South Georgia and said can you help me and she is that.

Guess I'll try you took all her notes and we went down for Christmas and we went over everything. I remember her grandmother. She is 9192 now she said with a smirk. She said honey. Have you ever thought that maybe the reason you cannot find them is because it didn't want to be found. The point is whether it was in that family or not. Maybe just a family name. Everyone has some skeletons in their family closet. There are no perfect families.

If anyone ever claims or makes it out to be like they are the family man. It was just pure, clean, wonderful line.

All of us have some rotten fruits in the family tree.

We do, and this morning were going to learn how to deal with those embarrassing family moments in situations.

This is unlike the typical messages that you hear whether here or somewhere else.

This is not your typical sermon. I'm hoping that as I'm preaching to you from the word of God. It's more of a counseling session that you're looking at is going okay that makes sense. I get it, rather than just do this do this and do this. Okay so this morning were going to look at if family that we've been studying since last weekend. The family of Abraham and Sarah. They had some skeletons in their closet. Let's all stand together. Genesis chapter 12 starting in verse 10 know there was a famine in the land and Abram went down to Egypt to dwell there for the famine was severe in the land and it came to pass, when he was close to entering Egypt that he said to Sarah by his wife.

Indeed, I know that you are a woman of beautiful countenance.

Therefore, it will happen when the Egyptians see you they will say this is his wife and they will kill me but I'll let you live. Please say that you are my sister maybe wealth with me for your sake, and that I may live because of you. What in the world would possess a man like Abraham who was Abraham the man who left everything behind and launched out to follow God wherever he leads a man who was willing to take his only son and sacrifice him on the altar to God because God told him to the man who is known as a friend of God, a father to the faithful a possessor of heaven and earth, he would say honey.

Can you help me out. Can you like say they were brother and sister. Let me repeat that statement. Once again, and hopefully will stick and stay in your mind and your heart very simple statement.

There are no perfect families. We all have some skeletons in our family closet. We all have those if you want to use the metaphor of the family tree. We all have those rotten fruits hanging somewhere in our family tree. For some, there are obvious for others.

We have covered them up. We have hidden them, but they're there. The message is to help us deal with those skeletons and deal with those rotten fruits. But before we do that, let me ask you this morning.

Do you have some embarrassing family secrets. Some situations that are taboo.

We don't talk about them things that mom and daddy did her grandfather did her grandmother dinner somewhere way back there things that happen know my purpose in this message is not to get you to open up the purposes this.

How do you handle them. How do you think about your past, have you embellished your past. It would embellished means you made it better than it is. Here's another question. Do you blame all your failures on their shameful memories that also happens while messed up because of what this person or this person wasn't there. We also ask you this morning. Do you wear those embarrassing family situations or shameful events as a badge of honor. Some people do that and praying this morning that as we deal with these skeletons in the family closet that you would look at them to a whole new set of glasses and here's a deeper question.

The question I ask every week.

If you are saved, do you realize that you are now part of a whole new family. You know, before you get saved you have an earthly family that maybe perfect earthly family that may be horrible but when you get saved you are now grafted into the family of God. Listen to what it says in John chapter 1 verse 12.

And I hope these were just stay in your mind and your heart.

But as many as received him, meaning Christ, to them he gave the right is like you give them a new birth certificate. He gave them the right to become children of God, to those who believe in his name.

When you receive Christ as your Savior, God gives you new adoption papers. Now you are my child not know sometimes we have so watered that down. It has become a cliché. We don't think about it that at this moment I am my parent's child, but I'm also a child of God. God is my heavenly father, with all the rights and privileges this morning. Does your life reflect those family traits the grace of God the mercy of God, the truth of God, the wisdom of God.

Everything that your father is everything that Christ is people see those family traits this morning. I pray that you will examine your hearts as we walked to this message so let's begin were studying the family of Abraham and Sarah. They had some skeletons in their closet. Our time is short. Let's jump right in step number one in Genesis 12 we just read the passage. There was a famine in the land of Canaan. So Abram took his wife Sarah are the names have been changed and he went down to Egypt. But before he entered Egypt, he had a talk with her.

It began with something like this honey. You look so pretty today when what is it something is this is that you fix your hair did you did you did you get a new dress late is what happens when men are usually complementing you like that. What's what is it you need something. We need a favor.

Can you do this for me. Can you make that call usually for me is that it offers a point I don't like to call for doctors appointment. Usually something likely made a call to me.

I don't know your schedule you really look pretty today Abraham not different for thousand years ago. Men haven't changed.

So he says can you do me a favor was okay. What is it but hold onto your hats, because this is unlike any favor.

You're so pretty when the Egyptians see you then try to take you also know that I'm your husband didn't kill me and take you. Can you help me out please can you live and tell them that you are my sister so I can live this is Abraham Ruben lot was captured by the Mesopotamian kings that came five kings came down, captured him, took him.

Abraham got an army of his servants together went after them defeated all of them and rescued his nephew and brought them back the same Abraham is saying. Can you please lie and pretend like were brother and sister. He's hiding behind his wife.

By the way, do you know how old they were at this time Abraham was 75 years old and Sarah.

I was 65 years old. He 75.

She is 65. Here's a point please and Mrs. a principal age does not eat of maturity I've done things that would not have been 10 years ago, but I don't know what possessed me to do that age does not always equal maturity, but praise God. If God can use a couple who is willing to do something like this. He can use us a man let's move on. Skeleton number two, sure. Genesis 20 now become to another incident which is very similar to the first one.

It's been 25 years since Egypt yelled, helping with the math. If he was 75. 25 years. He is now hundred years old. Sarah was 6525 years. He is she is nine years old. You would think by now hundred year old man would know better. But guess what, here we go again. No, Abraham verse two said of samurai, his wife, she is my sister sounded pretty good she is.

He lives in. So what did the king do this, the king of Qatar in Canaan. He ascended and took Sarah, she was be some woman 90 years old is like. I want that girl. So what happens here. Listen to verse 10 God comes to Abimelech in a dream and says that someone else's wife.

You are a dead man so I love the way Abimelech talks to him. I want to see what he says. Imagine this king sitting on his throne and hundred-year-old man is standing there like what possessed you to do this, you hundred she should know better by now you should not be claiming your wife as your sister, but listen to Abraham's response to this, he says, because I thought surely the fear of God is not in this place and it would kill me on account of my wife. So we are live, but now you get to see you real nice skeleton coming out of the closet. Verse 12 but indeed she is truly my sister humanity or sister do that sometimes people have a misunderstanding of ancient history. They think that about this time people were marrying the sisters and it was not a big deal.

Not true in the garden of Eden when God created Adam and Eve at that point. Yeah, it was acceptable for a time. This is way after the flood, things have changed. You don't have incestuous relationships anymore.

Okay, this is not normal.

That's the reason why even this incident is mentioned in here Melissa how Abraham tries to clarify, as if that makes it easier. Listen to what he says oh she is the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother. Oh, that makes it all right of course you have the same that were not the same mom.

It's all good now. Of course not.

She is your sister, but gets better and better.

Verse 13 and it came to pass, Abraham says when God caused me to wander from my father's house that I said to her, this is your agreement with me that you should every place we go you should say about me. He is my brother. This couple has been living a lie for 50 some years. The only two of those incidents are actually recorded in the Bible but everywhere they went, how do you think Abraham interview Sarah meet my sister and I can imagine the girls in the village coming in saying wow so you never married know who is that man is my brother every time the when in public. No display of affection.

Nothing because these this couple is living a lie you how common that is supposed honestly brother and sisters type situation, but people live a lie because they have made an unholy pact. Be very careful about agreements that you have made before you got saved agreement that you have made in fear and selfishness and stood up prayer and faith listen.

They are devastating is so much easier to say God I made that decision before I got say that I will never do this are never no go here never got now I'm following you.

The rules have changed. If I may add 1/2 truth is still a full line.

It never works out when you hide the truth. This couple door line for all these years, it caught up with them. Let's move on. Skeleton number three Genesis 26. This time Abraham is not the in the spotlight. It is his son Isaac. And so what happened in verse seven, the men of the place asked about his wife would the sun do same thing that he did. She is my sister, for he was afraid to say she is my wife, because he thought less the men of the place kill me for Rebekah because she is beautiful to behold when something is wrong in this family tree is it there's a principal I want you to remember is not original to me. Someone else said it, but I think it's so true, whatever you do in moderation. Your children will do an excess if you live in moderation.

Don't expect your children to be honest, a big lie in excess if you have a filthy mouth in moderation.

Your children will have a filthy mouth in excess this is just how things work. This only by the grace of God that you can reverse dad that your parents were not what they were supposed to be. But listen, you are walking with God it happens, happens all the time but it's only by the grace of God. Isaac copied his daddy by the way, the moderation excess situation.

Abraham sorta lied but Isaac really live because Isaac and Rebecca were not brother and sister were cousins. We see this before we go to the second half. The deeper part of the message. Do you have an unflattering past and your family history. Are there some scandalous moments in your parents and grandparents sometimes even great-grandparents life.

Here's here's my message to you this morning. Take hold.

If God can work with Abraham and Sarah even hope it was an incest even though their children did something sort of similar. Of course they went to their own country of people who followed God just like they do it. Of course I understand all of that.

The point is this.

If God can work with that group.

He can work with you but it's good little deeper. Why did Abraham, and later his son Isaac, do what they did and I mean the real reason behind why they claimed their wives as their sister is alarming. They were scared more than that I was to be a detective for the next few minutes I have a theory. Amber Hamm did not lie just to save his skin. I believe that he misunderstood what God told. I want you to think again and read again with me. Genesis 12 verse one when God called him this is what God said to him, he said, get out of your country from your family from your father's house to a land that I will show you.

I will make you a great nation.

I will bless you and make your name great and you shall be a blessing I will bless those who bless you I will curse him who curses you and you all the families of the earth shall be blessed. I wonder if Abraham mistakenly taught that God intended to bring his blessing his plan into the world only through him everywhere they went. The plan was to protect him yell still with me. The plan was, I need to be protected. I need to stay alive. Abraham was not a coward he was thinking that he alone was crucial for God's plan to Sarah help me out here because of the kill me.

God's plan is going to be in jeopardy. So lie.

I know you live and move on. But I can live to and go ahead and have the child on whatever needs to happen. So God's plan will not fail as a melanoma going to know if that's too much. Have you ever read these three chapters Genesis 1220 and 26. I encourage you go home and read it all the way here. One thing to find right up from the top. God never condemned Abraham or Isaac for what they did. He never said Abraham. How dare you live Isaac home with you. He never ever condemned. Would you like to know who he condemned the people who got live to let me read to you what he did in Genesis 12 after Pharaoh took Sarah with him. The Lord plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of samurai Abrams wife is like God.

This is not fair. The dude lied okay and were getting punished for him.

Guess what happens a second time. The second skeleton incident. Genesis 2018. The Lord had closed up all the wounds of the house of Abimelech.

I love this phrase because of samurai or Sarah Abrams wife God actually punished. The other group.

The second unifying is that God actually blessed Abraham and Sarah, and Isaac and Rebekah each time they went to Egypt they lie. God punishes the Egyptians and he blesses Abraham and Sarah. They lied to Abimelech, and the walkway with gold and silver. They got more blessings like wait a minute, God, this is not fair. We have judged them wrongly. God saw their heart. God saw the heart of Abraham.

God saw the heart of Sarah, and he knew their reasons for doing what they were doing because they were trying to be faithful to God, by the way Sarah misunderstood as well.

You know that your rim of the time she brought her maidservant to Abraham and said look I can give you child. Maybe you can try with this unit. What she was thinking. It doesn't have to be me as long as you have a descendent and you do what God is telling you to do God's going to bless you and bless this world.

So if you have done this, you have so raised yourself up as if you are the one who is walking with God wife is just there, or vice versa. Wives, you have done this, but you are so spiritual so godly I love Jesus and I love to say and guess what your husband he just daddy did.

I just want him to be there. Shame on you. Let me give you some suggestions to deal with the skeletons in your family closet number one.

Be honest. Be humble. Don't forget where you came from. You don't have to blasted everywhere. Neither do you have to brag about your past Miller do you have to embellish it.

Just be honest with us, to be honest, nothing. Be honest with others. Sometimes not worth sharing. Don't make yourself look better know make yourself look worse. Be honest with God.

Be honest with yourself. Here's number two.

Don't copy the wrong things.

Someone in your family has done will granddaddy did.

Granddaddy was wrong for doing that.

You don't have to be like that can have a name, and on that. You don't have to be like that.

By the way, time is running away, God blessed Abraham and Sarah when they left Egypt.

God blessed Abraham and Sarah in Canaan. God bless Isaac and Rebekah lit listen listen each time God blessed them. It also had some negative because it's wasn't Egypt that Sarah found Hagar if they had never done that deal. She would have to Hagar. It wasn't Egypt that lot was so enamored with the world and he came back in Abraham's that will pick what you want. He's in a move that looks more like Egypt and he picked Sodom and Gomorrah never ever say well you know it all worked out in the end know. Be careful we careful when you make the wrong decision, God will work everything together for good, but keep in mind there's always that call is so much better to obey God. Amen so much better to do things all the way God's way, half-lives, half-truths, never truly work. Here's another one except the humanity of your parents. Some of us need to come off our high horse and how we judge our parents. I did this several years ago I went through this this this season in my life where everything us look back at my parents. It was black-and-white it was. It was cut and drive. They were and they blew it over there no lower right get RC mom mom and daddy in their faults and their mistakes and in the cracks in the wall. Guess what happened. The older I'm getting the more the cracks are getting filled up to get guess what's gonna happen. Sometimes a field field sympathy for them is like good gracious markets are all right but going on out there to be with us how in the world to handle, except that your parents were humans who make mistakes who were selfish, who said things that should not have been said who did things that should not have been done. Give them grace skeletons in the closet show the skeletons some grace. God showed you grace God showed Abraham and Sarah grace. He said I see the heart. If I were God, I was set a whole Abraham boy you're done, you're out of my plan you're gone.

God says no. I see his heart. I know what he's up to that old boy you know. Learn show grace to your parents is another one when you follow God know that he will always work all things together for good. He always does.

If you let him. He will take the messes of your life. The messes up your past. People take the skeletons and just like Elijah. He will bring breathe life size equal he would bring breathe life into the skeletons. If you let I can give you many stories and many illustrations of men and women throughout history who had a terrible past. I want to do that.

I will give you one though.

This man had four women in his family tree.

One of them way back in the family tree actually tricked her own father long to sleeping with her and had a child and that's part of the family tree. Another one was a prostitute. Another one was a descendent or a part of a family that was born because of a father sleeping with her daughter.

Another one was an adulterer who was part of a plan to kill her own husband, talking about Jesus as the family tree of Jesus and amazing that if you read Matthew chapter 1. The genealogy only for women. I mention all four of them had a scandalous past is when God said it's time to bring my plan of the world I would begin with a brother and sister was wrong with them but hey I want to use them and then there's another mask mask another mask why because God specializes in messes. They were not right for what they did but that's what God that's amazing Grace, thank you so much for joining us today skeletons in the closet.

Every family has them. It's what you do with them.

When you turn to Jesus Christ. He gives you the grace and the mercy to handle the past. For more information visit us online@clearviewb.org and for today's sermon notes my blog site@rbdonshaw.com